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Haven't got time to conjure any up at the mo, but I'll pitch it to ya. It's that time of the year and you've WWE Superstars in your circle of friends... what would you get them for the big day? Something they need? A joke present?

It's all up to you!
 

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Asuka
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Sheamus: a tan.

Jack Swagger: Speech therapy treatment

Alex Riley: A semester at college. The moron could use the education.
 

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Randy Orton - medicine,how is humping the floor every time you going to attack someone, healthy?

John Cena - new merch,purple,orange,dammit they are too flashy xD

Sheamus - a hair cut

Natalya and Miz - new titles
 

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Triple h - a Shovel
Randy Orton - a pair of pants
CM Punk - Diet Pepsi machine
Daniel Bryan - A tie collection
The miz - he's wwe champion, he already has everything he could want
WWE Divas - Plane ticket's so we could hang out
Darren young - Cena merchandise
John cena - i'd get him a cheap, ugly ass hooker and use his credit card to pay for it all
VKM - TNA merchandise
Husky harris - slimfast
Laycool - rat poison
Zack Ryder - boyzone cd
Mark henry - a heavy duty treadmill
Big show - an all you can eat coupon for KFC
Yoshi tatsu - new ring gear
Tyson kid - something to shave that thing off his head
R truth - throat lozenges for that sore throat
Vladimir kozlov - Vodka
Sheamus - a sunbed
melina - Plastic surgery treatment to fix that jaw
Michael Cole - see "laycool"
Big zeek - nah screw it i'm too afraid he'd get pissed if he doesn't like my gift
Jomo - Gilette razor blade to shave that beard
Evan bourne - i'd buy him some credibility if i could
Dolph ziggler - peroxide
Kane - His old mask
Christian - i'd drug VKM to give him the world title
Taker - a brand new harley or a miracle cure to injuries
Dashing cody rhodes - Make up
Trent barreta and kaval - more TV time
Alex riley - Jack daniels or a "get out of jail free" card
ADR - what do you buy a man who kayfabe has everything?
Drew mcintyre - charisma
Edge - some rated R porn or something along those lines


TNA:

Jeff hardy - Cocaine
MAtt hardy - A mental health check up and if he's lucky, some grapes and unlimited internet access
Ric flair - clothing that do not come off...ever
Hulk hogan - A baldness cure
AJ styles- a face turn
RVD - marijuana
Orlando Jordan -....
Vince russo - does he deserve anything?
Dixie Carter - an in depth business plan explaining the importance of MARKETING compared to bringing in more "Talent"
 

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SWAG/SPICE
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I would buy Cena a heel turn. And I would buy AJ styles and samoa joe a WWE contract.
 

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I have read zero responses yet, so forgive me for rehashing the obvious jokes that others have already made.

Anyway, I'd buy...

Daniel Bryan: A tie.

Triple H: A shovel.

Christian: A swingset... maybe then someone will be forced to push him.

Koslov: Rocky IV on DVD - this guy needs to use the IF HE DIES, HE DIES line already. Maybe this will give him the idea.

Beth Phoenix: A protective cup...

Heath Slater: Some hair dye.

CM Punk: A case of diet soda.

ok that's enough crap jokes.
 

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I'd buy Alicia Fox new ring gear. The stuff she currently wears is an eye-sore. Pretty glittery stuff like Maryse!

CM Punk - comic books and more old school tattoos.

Michael Cole - a swift kick to the face.

Chris Jericho - a free voucher to come to my house and chat to me all night so I can bask in his awesome.

Randy Orton - my vagina in a box.
 

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I'd buy Alicia Fox a custom made Undefined Divas Championship belt.
 

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Linda McMahon- A senate seat.

Hornswoggle- Life insurance.

Randy Orton- A lifetime supply of baby oil.

Sheamus- Limes (and way too many of them).

CM Punk- A competent Straight Edge Society.

Michael Cole- A lump of coal.

Chris Jericho- A tapeworm (preferably gelatinous).

Michael McGillicutty- A.....um...I'll get him....I...ahh...A GENESIS.

Alex Riley- A really, really big keg.

R-Truth- A ZOOKEEPAH costume.

Ted Dibiase- Non-kayfabe cash.

Matt Striker- Something pretentious and irrelevant, to complement his announcing style.
 

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Here's my random list of things I will buy or give this Christmas:

- DiBiase, Gabriel, and JoMo - shaving cream and razor
- Daniel Bryan - neck tie
- Kaval - a winning streak
- Sheamus - Snooki's tanning bed
- Michelle McCool - excess carbohydrates
- Maryse - some of Layla's @$$ :p
- MVP - the TNA World Heavyweight Championship
- Christian - the WWE/World Heavyweight Championship
- Chris Jericho - hypocrites, parasites, and gelatinous tapeworms
- WWE venue security officials - a pay raise so that they'll do their job
- Jack Swagger and Cody Rhodes - thpeech impediment therapy
- Matt Hardy - liposuction and/or tummy tuck
- Jeff Hardy - a year in rehab
- Vickie Guerrero - slimming pills
- Dolph Ziggler - a new name
- Wade Barrett - FCW wrestlers as his new henchmen
- John Cena - a life outside WWE
- CM Punk - Jim Ross as his broadcast partner
- Michael Cole - a low blow
- Kane - his father
- Raw creative writers - a plaque of appreciation for coming up with mostly good Raws this year
- Smackdown creative writers - that same plaque, to their heads for a mostly boring year
 

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Linda McMahon- A senate seat.

Hornswoggle- Life insurance.

Randy Orton- A lifetime supply of baby oil.

Sheamus- Limes (and way too many of them).

CM Punk- A competent Straight Edge Society.

Michael Cole- A lump of coal.

Chris Jericho- A tapeworm (preferably gelatinous).

Michael McGillicutty- A.....um...I'll get him....I...ahh...A GENESIS.

Alex Riley- A really, really big keg.

R-Truth- A ZOOKEEPAH costume.

Ted Dibiase- Non-kayfabe cash.

Matt Striker- Something pretentious and irrelevant, to complement his announcing style.
I was going to say Limes.
 

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Ted DiBiase - A personality
Kane - Manequin
Triple H - A Son
David Otunga - Wrestling trunks that make him look more serious businesss
Joe Hennig (Mike McG) - Half his dad's mic skills
Todd Grisham - Jar of enthusiasm
 

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WWE Superstars

Sheamus - Lobster heads, Limes and a Tanning bed
Christian - The World Heavyweight Championship
Jomo & Gabriel - Shaving cream and a razor
CM Punk - Diet Soda
Cody Rhodes - Kneepads
John Cena - A new moveset
Edge - Rated R porn
Husky Harris - Slim Fast
Michael McGillicutty - A ticket to the next TNA Genesis PPV
Triple H - A heel turn
Tyler Reks - A reaction from the crowd
Tyson Kidd - A haircut
Natalya - A night with me
Chris Masters, Zack Ryder and Kaval - A winning streak
Michael Cole - A kick in the bollocks
Primo - Charisma
Trent Baretta - A PPV match or at least a few SD! matches vs Curt Hawkins
Curt Hawkins - A PPV match or at least a few SD! matches vs Trent Baretta

Former WWE Superstars

Jeff Hardy - In-ring ability
IRS - MITB briefcase
Gangrel - An actual bath filled with blood
SCSA - A lifetime supply of beer
Al Snow - A snowmobile
Matt Hardy - Slim Fast
JBL - A job back on the SD! commentary team
 
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