Bend her over and give her a good seeing to mate

 

Cheers man, big help haha!

Seriously though, what do I do?

 

If she's constantly upset and angry and depressed after a month, run for the fucking hills, brother.

 

As insensitive as it sounds, I was thinking the exact same thing. I personally just don't think that's the sort of stuff you'd want to be dealing with in an only month old relationship.

 

A passive aggressive woman, WHAT A FUCKING SHOCK. Having dealt with this type of woman almost exclusively, there is nothing you can really do. If she suffers from depression to the point of cutting, she needs help and you aren't qualified to help her. My advice from years of experience with this shit, fucking run. I don't get the feeling you will, though, so strap yourself in and enjoy the shit tsunami's that are constantly going to be coming your way. I was in a relationship like that for over 5 years and it drains your fucking soul. I'm just now with someone who is willing to talk things out and be calm and rationale and the difference is fucking staggering.

 

A passive aggressive woman, WHAT A FUCKING SHOCK. Having dealt with this type of woman almost exclusively, there is nothing you can really do. If she suffers from depression to the point of cutting, she needs help and you aren't qualified to help her. My advice from years of experience with this shit, fucking run. I don't get the feeling you will, though, so strap yourself in and enjoy the shit tsunami's that are constantly going to be coming your way. I was in a relationship like that for over 5 years and it drains your fucking soul. I'm just now with someone who is willing to talk things out and be calm and rationale and the difference is fucking staggering.

THAT's the type of person I am and I wish she would be! Is it really that bad, seriously nothing I can do? Because she understands how I feel, and it's not like she's a bitch or anything to me, she treats me really really well, but she does cut herself and does get depressed a lot :/

 

break up with her. Harsh, but the best outcome. Sounds like a bitch, sorry.

 

Why don't you tell her that because she's yours you want to make her happy and when she isn't it's a reflection on you and in turn makes you feel bad. Turn the tables on her and tell her your unhappy as she won't tell you the problem that you may be able to fix. You in turn become moody or short with her and if she cares she may tell you whats up! She may like the attention and then fear lack of it when you do the same.

I know this will sound harsh but are you sure she really wants to be with you? she's not just being a misery for you to sack her off on purpose is she?.

 

Never really thought of that actually, that last part..

I dunno I personally think she wants to be with me.. she was a friend of a friend and I didn't even know her until she started talking to me, and she was the one who started liking me first. She did have a situation where she told her friends she was worried that she loves me more than I love her but we're past that now.

 

You can wish all you want, if she's depressed all the time to the point of cutting, her wires are crossed and she needs help. I dealt with this for over 5 years, as I said. You can beg, plead, yell, scream, cry, everything. She won't get help unless she wants to. And one day she will stop treating you so well once the honeymoon period wears off. It will drain your soul over time, trust me. You love her and all that shit now but talk to me in 5 years of that depression bullshit. You won't feel the same, you'll grow to resent her. Again, my advice, give her a chance to make a real effort in getting better. It will take time. If she refuses, run for your life. Don't get dragged down into her hell with her. Trust me. Misery loves company.

 

She needs professional help. There's only so much a person can do to help another, and she isn't opening up to you so the best thing you can do is ask her is she wants professional help. Take her to the doctors and see if they can recommend any psychiatrists or something.

Honestly, girls like that will take you for a ride to hell and back if they don't sort their depression out. Maybe ask her parents to talk to her if she won't talk to you.

 

Trouble is though, I'm pretty much the only person that knows about this.

You can wish all you want, if she's depressed all the time to the point of cutting, her wires are crossed and she needs help. I dealt with this for over 5 years, as I said. You can beg, plead, yell, scream, cry, everything. She won't get help unless she wants to. And one day she will stop treating you so well once the honeymoon period wears off. It will drain your soul over time, trust me. You love her and all that shit now but talk to me in 5 years of that depression bullshit. You won't feel the same, you'll grow to resent her. Again, my advice, give her a chance to make a real effort in getting better. It will take time. If she refuses, run for your life. Don't get dragged down into her hell with her. Trust me. Misery loves company.

You make a LOT of sense man. It does seem like she's getting less and less interested in wanting me to come out and see her, as it used to be the other way round, she'd want to see me all of the time! I did have this idea of giving her the whole "harsh truth" speech.. saying something like if she doesn't start being more open with me or stop doing what she's doing then I'm just going to leave. Trouble is though, and here's the kicker, when I was asking her to just be open with me, she told me that out of the people she's told stuff too in the past have just left her and walked away, and I told her that I love her too much to just walk away, I told her I wanted to try and help!

 

Don't try to figure out her problems and solve them, try to make her forget about her problems.

 

Have you considered that if you've only been seriously seeing each other for a month, she doesn't feel ready to be open with you about her issues? Pressuring her to talk is the opposite of the way to build trust. Show that you're there by being there, but letting her come to you when she feels like it.

 

Yeah I have, I've told her that she doesn't need to rush to tell me things REALLY REALLY serious.. It's just, whenever she's upset or something in general, she won't even tell me IF anyone upset her if you gt me?

Try to talk to her about her past, man. Sounds like she has some serious issues from childhood. Probably needs to see a therapist though if it's at the point she's cutting.

Or break up with her if you'd rather not.

Yeah I have, she's actually quite open about her past. Nothing BAD like a shit childhood (as far as I'm concerned), but she's opened up about small problems from her family, so by her opening up that kind of stuff, I think she would have said something by now.

 

Try to talk to her about her past, man. Sounds like she has some serious issues from childhood. Probably needs to see a therapist though if it's at the point she's cutting.

Or break up with her if you'd rather not.

 

Cheat on her, tell her and break her mentally and emotionally. Then, she is yours.

Trust me on this, I'm a professional.

 

You aren't gonna change her, dude, so my advice would be to suggest that she see a shrink, or you break up with her. I've dated insecure girls, and have close friends who have done the same, and it never ends well. You feel badly for them, but honestly is it something you see yourself dealing with for the rest of your life?

 

seeking advice on a wrestling forum for relationship advice is like going to a dentist on how to fly a plane though isn't it?

 

Not really, it's easier for people to speak openly at times with people they don't know. You never know who has been through the same as you.

 

Not really. I'd like to think that a majority of people (no matter how retarded they act on here) have at least gone on a date before, or at least have friends of the opposite sex to know what makes females tick.

 

If a girl won't even share her sorrows with you I don't know if she trusts you with her true feelings,I mean all who love me share their sorrows with me and girls who I know actually like me talk to me about deep stuff all the time.I wouldn't say dump her I'd say you should pretend to get angry when she's not sharing her sorrows with you for you to help,If that "angers her" and has her thinking you're the one who did a mistake just leave her.You don't want to be somebody's bitch,Manhood is to never be any woman's bitch.

I've been with my girlfriend for a month now, seeing her for a lot longer and I love her to pieces, she's amazing in EVERY way!

I lol'd,Sorry but I couldn't resist.

 

Just relax, be happy, do what you want to do to be happy, if that's the most important thing to you, get 'through' to her, ask if she feels needs anything, and most importantly what is actually that 'bad'? Don't get stuck in a mindset of what you're told and the cliches surrounding this kind of stuff, everything can be what you make it to be personally.

 

@ TheStudOfEngland - The joke was that not very many wrestling fans would be good with relationship advice because we are wrestling fans, but that is also true. ~

 

She has a penis.

 

I knew it!

 

Don't breakup with her, you've only been going out a month. Give it a little time to see if she will open up to you. Obviously don't spend years with a nutter like Walls did, but you can't expect anyone to just dish up all their personal crap within a month of dating.

 

Sounds to me like she has AIDs but doesn't want to tell you, because you probably have AIDs as well now.

 

Okay since I've seen her, I basically told her that I'm not going to keep forcing her to tell me what's wrong, I'm just going to try my best to cheer her up whenever I know she's feeling down.

I'm still not sure though I mean.. have any of you guys ever had a relationship where you REALLY love the person but it just doesn't feel right? We're SO different on our opinions as well and I have NO idea what to do!

 

Here's the thing. You can't make someone change. Insisting your partner open up to you, when they have defined trust issues, is the top way to make them clam up. You have to really mean it when you say you won't pressure or work on her. And even 'working' to make her happy may come across as pressure.

If she has mental health issues, it may not be as simple as you cheering her up with actions. If she has trust issues, continuing to discuss it - even as you're saying that you're not going to pry - may push her away.

Just be yourself, and let her be herself. And if that's not enough, you may not be right for each other.

 

Unless you see a dramatic situation take place, give it some time. It's only been a month and some people take longer to warm up than others. But, at the same time, let her know that it frustrates you if she won't tell you what's going on.

At some point, she's going to have to shit or get off the pot. You'll know when that time is, and then you can decide where to go from there.

 

Wrestlingforum: THE GO TO PLACE FOR RELATIONSHIP ADVICE.

 

Showtime I have a story for you. Can you help?

TeaZy/Tantrum whatever the fuck you call yourself shut the fuck up, you're 12 and you don't know shit.

OP, just talk to her and let her know you are there, this is something she has to deal with on her own and she has to decide to trust and open up to you.

 

can I help you with your story? of course.