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15 things I learned from 02/28/2011 Raw

7287 Views 57 Replies 42 Participants Last post by  Chris_Walmer
1. If The Undertaker will die if he loses his streak, which is impossible seeing as The Dead Man is already dead.

2. If Triple H loses his match against The Undertaker, he will die. A little too dramatic Trips, but hey, whatever it takes to make the crowd give a shit about you.

3. Sheamus not only got his ass kicked by Triple H, but he got Pedigreed through a table. But fear not, Fella fans. Do not cry......DO NOT CRY! The Celtic King has yet to be buried.

4. Evan Bourne beat Mayonaise in 30 seconds. NOW he's buried.

5. The only thing I learned from The Viper's promo is that he wants to cripple CM Punk to the point of no recovery. Somewhere out there, a paraplegic stopped being an Orton mark.

6. Somewhere, in this ring, at this moment, starting right now, somewhere, at this very moment, happening here, starting right now...a soft knee bump to the head...caused the knockout...of McGillicutty.

7. If Jerry Lawler touches Michael Cole, he's fired. But if they touch one another, they're both fired. But if Jerry Lawler touches Michael Cole, he's fired. But Michael Cole can touch Jerry Lawler, and not get fired. Um, what?

8. Jack Swagger is going to train Michael Cole. There will also be a special guest referee of Cole's choosing. I'm willing to bet here to the first person that says it's Jim Rosse: If it is J.R, I'll donate 5,000 credits to you. If it isn't Ross, then I'm going to laugh at your ass for making the useless bet in the first place.

9. Toilets are called Johns because, like John Cena, they are full of crap. You'll find this failed joke and many other infamous botches in Alex Riley's soon-to-be-released best-selling book Going A-Ri: How to Eliminate Yourself and Attack Black People, coming to WWEShop.com whenever Riley is future endeavored.

10. FINALLY, The Rock HAS COME BACK to Buffa....you know he's in Hollywood right?

11. Yabba Dabba Bitch > John Cena's entire rap. End of discussion.

12. The Bella Whores won a 30 second Battle Royale to challenge for Eve Torres's Divas Championship. The stipulation? Whoever sucks Vince's dick the hardest gets the title shot.

13. When comes down to choosing between the man who gave him the two best matches of his career... and the guy that played the game, beat the living shit out of him on multiple occasions, pretended to be his friend so he could boost his own career, and milked him for everything he's worth all the way down to his last moment on Raw before retirement...Shawn Michaels chooses the latter.

14. The Miz's excuse for attacking Daniel Bryan was that he did it because he could. In reality, Bryan's finger had been inside Gail Kim, and Miz managed to prevent those kids from sniffing it.

15. After 9 months of playing his NXT Season 2 Rookie, and later his official apprentice (June 2010 - February 2011), Alex Riley is no longer The Miz's sidekick. If this, along with Michael Cole's eventual loss to Jerry Lawler, isn't another indicator that The Miz is turning face after WrestleMania, then I don't know what is.
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· You're better than that Cole.
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The only thing I learned from Raw is that I need to reconsider my willingness to fork out money for a Wrestlemania ticket if this is the so called 'future' of the WWE.
YOU DAMN RIGHT BUDDY!

-You got mid-carders like The Miz as WWE Champion
-Dolph Ziggler who gets outperformed by Vickie night after night is a former World Heavyweight Champion within 7 minutes.
-Jack Swagger, a former WORLD CHAMPION will not be competing at the biggest stage of them all but instead just be an announcers trainer and let them hog the spotlight.
-You got Sheamus who received the most memorable backwards push in WWE History as his credibility is fading badly which he may not even recover.
-You got Daniel Bryan not doing anything with the United States title.

Yep this is the future of the WWE. You better be prepared for it cause I’m sure as hell not. :p
 

· Banned
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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
The only thing I learned from Raw is that I need to reconsider my willingness to fork out money for a Wrestlemania ticket if this is the so called 'future' of the WWE.
As much as I hate to say it, I'm starting to agree with you. WrestleMania XXVII is so far shaping up to be a bad PPV. Normally, I buy it. But like the other PPVs, I may end up watching it online instead.
 

· Banned
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Hmm...

- Buffalo, NY has one of the worst wrestling crowds of all time.
- Triple H overacts in his promos even worse than he does in his movies.
- The amount of baby oil Randy Orton pours on his body before entering the arena seems to be increasing by the week.
He should just have a bathtub full of it at Wrestlemania and incorporate it into a special entrance.
- Having an actual match on Raw is a special treat these days.
- Having people be in the actual arena is also a special treat.
- Even though Alex Riley's career was on the line tonight, there's no need to show his reaction or even his face as Raw goes off the air. The same close up of Miz walking up the ramp that shows every week will do.
 

· There is no duty we so much underrate as... being
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I learned that I want Steve Austin to run over the room in which the creative team "works" next week with an extremely large vehicle.
 

· Registered
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I've learned a lot from this episode too:

Buffalo, NY will pay their own hard earned money to go to a WWE event but don't expect them to give a shit about said event once there.

Michael Cole really wants to know what King thinks of "that".

The Miz couldn't careless that his apprentice who has helped him win so many matches is now fired.

Sometime's the commercials can be better than Raw itself.
 

· Banned
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I've learned a lot from this episode too:

Buffalo, NY will pay their own hard earned money to go to a WWE event but don't expect them to give a shit about said event once there.

Michael Cole really wants to know what King thinks of "that".

The Miz couldn't careless that his apprentice who has helped him win so many matches is now fired.

Sometime's the commercials can be better than Raw itself.
I actually thought it was very in-character. He's definitely a selfish heel type.
 

· Stay Grapey!
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Hmm...

- Buffalo, NY has one of the worst wrestling crowds of all time.
- Triple H overacts in his promos even worse than he does in his movies.
- The amount of baby oil Randy Orton pours on his body before entering the arena seems to be increasing by the week.
He should just have a bathtub full of it at Wrestlemania and incorporate it into a special entrance.
- Having an actual match on Raw is a special treat these days.
- Having people be in the actual arena is also a special treat.
- Even though Alex Riley's career was on the line tonight, there's no need to show his reaction or even his face as Raw goes off the air. The same close up of Miz walking up the ramp that shows every week will do.
one shitty show and a bad reaction to said shitty show doesnt make it a horrible crowd of alltime
 

· There is no duty we so much underrate as... being
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Well, a few posts ago you did say, "It's lame and nobody cares."
 
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