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post #1 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-15-2018, 10:18 AM Thread Starter
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Donnie watches ECW 1993

I've been wanting to do this for a LONG time and I never got around to it, but fuck it, this is FINALLY happening. I have every TV, PPV and live event from 93-01 on torrents instead of the Network, reason being is because the Network has messed with the music and cut stuff out and it just isn't ECW to me. So, I'm going to do it like this.

Technically ECW started in 92 but there is very little footage of it and Hardcore TV didn't debut until 93, so we'll start there.

Also, there will be a MOTY and WOTY decided on a point system because I like doing things like that, and it's a fun little thing.

NWA/ECW Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, since 16/11/92
NWA/ECW Television Champion: Vacated
NWA/ECW Tag Team Championships: The Super Destroyers, since 23/6/92

ECW HARDCORE TV
5/4/93
Philadelphia


During the into we see guys like Bulldog, Anvil & Volkoff. Only Anvil will ever show up in a review, I think.

Our commentators are Jay Sulli and Stevie Wonderful. They call it "THE ECW", which is off-putting to say the least. Future WCW mole and current ECW president Todd Gordon makes his way out with the TV title in hand, he announces a tournament for it starting tonight. He also says a third man will be joining the booth, AND MY MAN, HOTSTUFF EDDIE GILBERT MAKES HIS WAY OUT. FUCK YEAH. Todd cuts him off and says he won't put up with any of his shenanigans

He says we will see the actual third man as he throws it to footage from Quantum Leap, where we see Terry Funk beating the fuck out of some dweebs. Funk makes his way out and Eddie loses his shit screaming about how Funk is old, Terry says you have to be tough to run in his gang and he would challenge him to fight in the ring, but he wonders how it would look if an old man was to kick his butt. Fair point. Eddie backs off and leaves as Funk puts over Philly and the company.

Match#1 Super Destroyers w/Angel & Hunter Q Robbins vs THE HELL RIDERS
SD's come out to the Halloween theme, which means I have to like them as a rule. Actually, scratch that, they suck. Classic generic, muscle head goons in black masks throwing weak strikes and doing basic power moves. One of them hits a flipping senton to win
1/2*

Post match, Funk interviews their manager, Hunter Q Robbins the third, he keeps calling him a turd, much to Q's annoyance and instance that he be called "Mr" Funk keeps saying it until Turd leaves.

WE GET A HYPE VIDEO FOR SURFER SANDMAN We see footage of him wrestling Lawler and Kerry Von Erich.

First round tournament matches tonight will be Snuka vs Larry Winters. Tommy Cairo vs Wildman Bellomo.

Yeah, Snuka works here as do a few other old guys hanging on to the spotlight as long as possible. They're good name recognition at least

Match#2 Wildman Bellomo vs Tommy Cairo (ROUND 1)
Wildman has a dude dressed as the Grand Wizard with him, but it's not him on account of deadness. Cairo is undefeated and goes by "Ironman" They have a pretty sloppy back an forth to start, and it hits me how LONG the next year of shows is going to be but it's worth it, because I know it gets better. It improves a little as Tommy moves well and throws some decent strikes, and Wildman does a lot of headbutts. Not GW causes a distraction and a Johnny HOTBODY runs down and tries to attack Cairo, but he moves and Bellomo gets knocked to the outside and eventually counted out
3/4*

HOTBODY tries to attack but Cairo fights him off.

Match#3 Rockin' Rebel vs Tony Stetson

Damn it, I hate Rebel. He's famous for having a legit promoters license in Philly and using it to weasel his worthless ass onto shows, he'd do this for years with CZW. He's also a little famous for an incident in 95 where he was told he was going to win a battle royal and face Shane, only to have everyone throw him out first. He stalls a lot and does nothing worth mentioning or writing anything about. I'll just say it's not horrible as I want it to be. Tony is decent enough with the basics and he even has a nice top rope legdrop. Sadly, he has to put this mope over as Rebel takes it with a pin with his feet on the ropes
*1/2

Post match, Jay interviews him and mentions he's the #1 contender for the ECW championship He says he's ready for Sandman and he will take the belt and his career.

Before his match, Snuka comes out and says he's singed a contract with HOTSTUFF EDDIE GILBERT. Jay asks if he's a manger and Eddie says he's not that, he IS in charge of Hotstuff International and Jimmy is the first of many.


Match#4 Jimmy Snuka w/Eddie Gilbert vs Larry Winters (ROUND 1)

Jimmy is very, very washed at this point but he's a "name", so we're stuck with him for a while. He actually falls over after HE hits a backdrop
Splash mercifully ends it after Eddie trips Winters
Dog poo on your shoe

Funk gets on the mic and says there is room for improvement when it comes to his commentary and he'll get better at it soon. WHAT A GUY. Wildman and not Wizard run out and scream a lot before getting into the ring ad beating the snot out of an unnamed jobber. Good angle even if Wildman blows.

Todd Gordon comes out and says Sandman will be here next week Funk signs us off with "Adios, Partners'

And thus ends the first ECW Hardcore TV episode. Hope you enjoyed it, and you enjoy the next few months of reviews.
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Last edited by Donnie; 11-16-2018 at 04:43 AM.
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post #2 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-15-2018, 01:08 PM
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Re: Donnie watches ECW 1993

Shite review, do more lucha

I always wanted to do something like this but I can't stick to a a project long enough . Loads of crap to be had watching ECW but there are bound to be some gems. Hope you keep this up (like your WCW/NWA watches). Will be reading.
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post #3 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-15-2018, 04:49 PM
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Re: Donnie watches ECW 1993

I'd go for torrents too. WWE censoring stuff like "Surfin' USA" and "Whoomp! There It Is" makes it a no deal.
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post #4 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-15-2018, 07:18 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Donnie watches ECW 1993

Quote:
Originally Posted by MC View Post
Shite review, do more lucha

I always wanted to do something like this but I can't stick to a a project long enough . Loads of crap to be had watching ECW but there are bound to be some gems. Hope you keep this up (like your WCW/NWA watches). Will be reading.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yeah1993 View Post
I'd go for torrents too. WWE censoring stuff like "Surfin' USA" and "Whoomp! There It Is" makes it a no deal.
Sabu is the real lucha guy, MC Thanks for reading


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post #5 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-16-2018, 01:52 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Donnie watches ECW 1993

NWA/ECW Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, since 16/11/92
NWA/ECW Television Champion: Vacated
NWA/ECW Tag Team Championships: The Super Destroyers, since 23/6/92


ECW HARDCORE TV
April 12th, 1993
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania



I should have mentioned that Snuka was the ECW champ in 92, but I don't like talking about him unless I have no other choice.

Wonderful again introduces Gilbert as the third man in the booth, but Sulli cuts it off and shows some footage of Funk on Quantum Leap beating that Scott Baio fucker up.

Terry makes his way and an argument breaks out with Eddie, Funk says maybe Eddie can stay because that would mean Terry would have both arms free to kick his butt. Eddie laughs it off, so Funk pours water down his shirt and he runs off.

Match#1 Johnny Hotbody vs. Glen Osbourne (ROUND 1)

HOTBODY is working a narcissist gimmick, while Osbourne is doing an Ultimate Warrior ripoff one, shitty make up and all. He even wrestles as "good' as Warrior did. Johnny isn't much either, but I like him more than this goof. Lots of weak looking strikes without a lot of fire or care behind them, just a really boring opening portion. Johnny maybe has it won off a nice looking German, but he elects to do more damage on the outside with a suplex on the concrete and a flying shoulderblock to follow it. YEAH, DO STUFF. After that, Johnny sits in a sleeper for minute or two before Glen fights back but the ref gets knocked down, so Johnny kicks Glen in the dick and nails a piledriver and has it won but he again elects to keep going, he tries a Superplex but Cairo runs down in revenge for last week and trips him and Glen hits a terrible splash to win.
*

Post match, Funker interviews Glen and he does the Warrior voice and some screaming. Man, fuck this guy.

Match#2 Larry Winters & Tony Stetson vs Samoan Warrior & Chris Michaels
Winters and Tony are the #1 contenders, so this is a showcase for them. They aren't very good but still better than half the guys we've seen. Winters moves alright and does well, while Tony is pretty bad as he botches most of what he tries or he throws really weak strikes. The jobbers get a little offence and it's not very good either. Early ECW is not very good, I guess is what I'm trying to say. They hit the future AMW'S Death Sentence to win
*1/2

Post match, Funker tries to interview them but Q shows up and talks smack to them, they grab him but it's a VERY obvious trap for the SDs to attack from behind. They fight in the crowd as Funk holds Q back. Good angle, even if I don't want to watch the actual match.

Funk and Jay talk about Sandman wrestling the main event and how he'll be a great ECW champion. They throw it to another AMAZING hype video set to Big Shot by Billy Joel. Again, real music HELPS so much and it's a major reason why ECW has to be watched like this.



To further my point he comes out to "Surfin USA" and it really sells this whole deal.

He speaks to Funker and cuts a very over the top babyface promo about how happy he is to be here and how he'll fight for the people. Terry says he's a good man who helps kids and he really likes him.

Match#3 The Sandman (C) w/Peaches vs Kodiak Bear (ECW Heavyweight Championship)
Bear looks like Big Josh's big brother. Peaches is Sandman's real life wife, Lori and while she's not all that important at this point, in a couple of years she will be VERY important. This a fine enough showcase for the champ. Bear isn't much but Sandman sells well for him and makes him look good. Sandman has a SWEET missile dropkick to take back over before he wins with a Million Dollar Dream.
*1/2

Funk sings "Mr Sandman" after the match.

Match#4 Eddie Gilbert vs JT Smith (Round 1)
FUCK YEAH, FUTURE FBI MEMBER JT IS HERE. This rules, God Bless these two. They have an awesome punch off to start before they go to the outside where Eddie blasts him with a chair shot to take over. He really beats the fuck out of JT, who dies on everything because he's the best. They fight all over the building and it's really fun. Eddie uses the ring bell on JT as Funk stands up and scream at him, but he doesn't get involved. JT fights back with punches as he does some good punch drunk sells. He tries the Moonsault but Eddie moves and goes back to beating him up. They keep trading punches but Eddie gets something out of his pocket and KO's JT to win
**3/4

Jay tries to tell the ref what happened so Eddie spits on him and leaves.

More of this and less of the shit, ECW.

Match#5 Tommy Cairo vs DARK NINJA
Damn it ECW, this is what I don't want. The tape actually fucks up briefly which feels like the Wrestling God's trying to help me. Cairo is again decent and the Ninja bumps well and does alright stuff. Before it can get good Tommy hits a flash German to win
3/4*

HOTBODY runs out and attacks and they fight off to the back. Another good angle with a match attached I don't want to see.


Terry interviews Gordon and they announce the semi finals and final will take place next week.
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Last edited by Donnie; 11-16-2018 at 04:43 AM.
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post #6 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-16-2018, 03:23 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Donnie watches ECW 1993

NWA/ECW Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, since 16/11/92
NWA/ECW Television Champion: Vacated
NWA/ECW Tag Team Championships: The Super Destroyers, since 23/6/92


ECW HARDCORE TV
April 19th, 1993
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania


TONIGHT THE SEMI FINALS AND FINALS OF THE TV TOURNAMENT.

Once again, Eddie walks out and speaks. He says he knows he isn't the 4th man and he would like to apologise to Funk for his actions, they both come from wrestling families and he's sorry for what he did and he respects him. Funk comes out and says he wont accept it, and he won't turn his back on him. Eddie says sorry again and leaves as Wonderful follows him to the back.

Match#1 Super Destroyers w/Q & Angel vs Super Ninja & Canadian Wolfman
Wolfman is a fat bald dude that looks like an extra on Justified or SOA. SD's again do meh clubbing and it makes me want to watch Demolition's WWF run again, so I can remember how good clubbing is when done right. They move into power moves and they do a little better at that than anything else they've done. Still not very good, though. This goes on for a while because no matter whose in charge of ECW, time management is a mess. Senton finally ends it
1/2*

Jay tries to tell me that didn't take long Only a few months until Joey shows up.

Post match, Funker interviews them. BUT NEVERMIND THAT SHIT AS EDDIE ATTACKS FUNK FROM BEHIND WITH A CHAIR. HELL YEAH. HE CLOBBERS THE SHIT OUT OF HIM AND CHOKES HIM WITH IT UNTIL WE GO TO BREAK. Awesome stuff.

Match#2 Jimmy Snuka w/Eddie Gilbert vs Tommy Cairo (ROUND 2)

Eddie is wearing a cowboy hat which I imagine will be the highlight of this. Actually, never mind, because the real highlight is Eddie joining commentary doing a Terry Funk Impression. The match is a crappy as you think. Snuka blows and Tommy can't do anything with him. Eddie keeps getting involved and he's the only saving grace as he bumps like a madman. The ref gets bumped and HOTBODY tries to attack but Tommy fight him off, it gives Snuka enough time to hit a shitty punch and the splash to win
Fathering Tamina



Eddie does his amazing impression again before he says he will take ECW over and he will win the Heavyweight Championship and Jimmy will win the TV title. He says Funk has been put out to pasture and this is HIS TV show.

Before his match, Eddie tries to get Glen to go home with his 20 kids and 5 wives and whatever other weird stuff he's into. Glen refuses so the match is on.


Match#3 Eddie Gilbert W/Tigra vs Glen Osbourne (ROUND 2)

Because Eddie is the best he figures a straight match with this dick will be bad, so he bumps all over the place before brawling on the outside for a bit. It's fun only because of him. They go back inside and Eddie continues to control it and Glen is good at getting his ass kicked at least. He comes back and Eddie again bumps well for him, one of the least selfish guys ever. He uses the object on his hand again to KO the kid and it gets 3. YEAH...Oh, that asshole Jay tells the ref what happened so he reverses the decision and Glen wins
**
Sadly, this means Snuka vs Glen in the final

Post match, Eddie grabs Jay and goes for the kill, BUT FUNK HITS HIM WITH A CHAIR AND BEATS THE PISS OUT OF HIM IN REVENGE. FUCK YEAH, THIS FEUD. Eddie bails so Funk goes after Wonderful and screams about them making a fool out of him. He says NO ONE will tell him what to do and he wants to kick some ass. HE IS AN OLD MAN, AN ENDANGERED SPECIES. HE IS A ONE AND ONLY. HE IS TERRY FUNK AND HE IS THE MEANEST FUCK IN TOWN, AND IF EDDIE WANTS TO SHOOT AT HIM HE CAN DAMN WELL SHOOT AT HIM, AND IF HE WANTS TO WRESTLE HIM THEY CAN DO THAT AS WELL. Terry Funk is God.

Jay interviews Peaches about her kissing Sandman last week. She says he's the champion and she likes him and we'll have to see where this goes.

Rebel makes his way out and demands to speak to Peaches, he asks what Sandman has that he doesn't. He talks like a real slezebucket and it feels very natural for him. He tries to force a kiss so she slaps him.

Match#4 Rockin' Rebel vs ?
Rebel is mad so he beats the shit out of the jobber and it's not the worst thing ever. He wins in about 30 seconds with a Spinebuster
1/2*

He grabs Peaches by the hair and drags her to the ring, he again tries to force a kiss but Sandman makes the save. Tigra runs out and claws at Sandman's eyes, AND REBEL BREAKS THE SURF BOARD OVER SANDMAN'S HEAD. JAY SCREAMS "HE COULD BE DEAD" Please die and get replaced by Joey. Awesome angle, showing this is where ECW's strength lies and what will take them to the top. Best part is that Paul isn't even booking yet, so it can only get even better from here.

Match#5 Jimmy Snuka w/Eddie Gilbert vs Glen Osbourne (ECW TV CHAMPIONSHIP FINALS)
This is very, very bad, that shouldn't shock you at all. Snuka is horrible and Glen sucks almost as bad. Gordon joins commentary and goes back an forth with Eddie. Snuka can't bump anymore as he slowly goes down or gingerly flips over, just a wretched piece of shit. Eddie/Glen should have been the finals not this crap. The ref gets bumped and Eddie elbows Glen in the head and Snuka hits the splash to win the belt
Nia Jax's wrestling ability

Backstage, Wonderful is standing outside of Sandman's locker room. He tries to speak to him but Peaches opens the door and says they're waiting for the doctor and Sandman might have a concussion.

To end the show we learn that Don Muraco is debuting next week


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post #7 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-16-2018, 04:26 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Donnie watches ECW 1993

This took place in January and I should have reviewed it first, which is my bad. We see wrestlers backstage watching on and I spot a young "NO GIMMICKS NEEDED" Chris Candido This is also a fancam which is important because that will be a HUGE part of ECW's identity, and it's also something that will nearly kill the company 4 years before it actually does die.


Eddie Gilbert vs Terry Funk (I QUIT MATCH 23/1/93 BATTLE OF THE BELTS)
Eddie has an unnamed woman with him, SO THE REAL WOMAN COMES OUT AND CHASES HER OFF. Eddie stalls like crazy and it dawns on me that a heel stalling really is a lost arm form that needs to be bought back. Funk finally gets him and beats the hell out of him in classic Terry Funk fashion. Eddie takes WILD bumps on the floor and for a dude whose body was slowly breaking down it's ballsy as fuck and also dumb, but I love him so I can't hate him. In an amazing moment, Terry gets SO out of control he tries to fight the ref. Eddie throws amazing punches so Funker goes to the arm to cut him off, and beats the snot out of it. Eddie punches his way out of it. I LOVE how real this fight feels because of hard they're working and laying everything in. Speaking of, Funk has his head SMASHED into a table and it gets very hard to watch after the second hit. Eddie uses a metal object to further attack the head and it's brutal as fuck, especially when it looks like Terry is bleeding from the ear. He belts the fuck out of him with the mic and just WREAKS Funk's head. Just a gross ass kicking made even better by Terry Funk selling like death and Eddie being a viscous bastard.

Funk fights back with his amazing punches that look to just about KILL Eddie. He gets revenge for the table when he DDT's Gilbert onto it and smacks his face off as hard as possible. Funk calls him a piece of shit and demands he quit, Eddie won't, so Terry slaps the taste out of his mouth. HE HITS A BRAINBUSTER RIGHT ON THE FLOOR. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.
They keep killing each other and it gets harder and harder to watch in the best way possible. EDDIE THROWS A FIREBALL RIGHT IN FUNK'S FACE. OH MY GOD YES. Terry's screams are SO difficult to listen too. Eddie calls him crazy and the way his voice breaks as he sounds almost afraid puts it over the top. They use wooden steps and Funk no sells a shot and starts screaming 'YOU THINK I'M CRAZY?" over and over and Eddie looks terrified. He again tries to kill him but Funk won't die. He manages to tie Gilbert in the ropes AND HE SMASHES HIS KNEE OVER AND OVER AGAIN WITH THE WOODEN STEPS. FUCKING HELL. Eddie yells that Terry is breaking his leg and that's he's killing him. After another half dozen shots to the knee, Eddie FINALLY quits.

Jesus Christ, that was absolutely amazing.

****1/2

Funks collapses on the floor and starts shaking like the deranged lunatic he is as people yell for help. A bunch of people come out and check and a few of them start arguing with each other about what to do when Terry starts shoving people, they back off and let him walk out under his own power.



WATCH THIS NOW.
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post #8 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-16-2018, 10:10 AM
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Re: Donnie watches ECW 1993

I never knew this match existed, let alone the show. I've now found it on the RF site, so will be ordering that too.

Thanks Donnie
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post #9 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-16-2018, 12:03 PM
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Re: Donnie watches ECW 1993



Now that Funk/Gilbert match has piqued my interest after a full on @Donnie ; splurge review. Turns out I've had it on a Funk comp all along (dated as 1993/01/23) so I'll dig it out.
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post #10 of 13 (permalink) Old 11-16-2018, 12:17 PM
 
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Re: Donnie watches ECW 1993

You ever think about starting up a youtube channel. Might as well make some money off reviewing it even if its alittle
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