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Old 10-06-2012, 04:27 AM   #31 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)

Just show reruns of the attitude era.
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Old 10-06-2012, 05:26 AM   #32 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)

Quote:
Originally Posted by CMojicaAce View Post
Main Event: John Cena on commentary as he announces a huge main event. Out comes none other than PRESIDENT OBAMA! He talks about how he is tired of that jackass Mitt Romney talking nonsense about him. He calls Mitt out. They cut a promo for the ages until, George W Bush comes out! He talks about how Obama stole his spotlight and how he banged Obama's wife. Obama slaps Bush. Out comes Vince Mcmahon. He tells how he will run for president in 2016. They all laugh. He declares that they have a No Holds Barred Match right then and there. They all agree. As the match is about to start, Vince announces the special guest referee: Big Dick Johnson. The match begins. Eventually, everyone is bleeding heavily, and Obama nails the Canadian Destroyer on Mitt and pins him. Obama celebrates as he points up to an American flag. Confetti falls down as Guile's theme song plays. Then, out of nowhere, Mario Balotelli comes out and hits the Rough Ryder on him. He celebrates like how he did against Germany as the camera focuses on him. Raw goes off the air.
That would actually be frikkin' awesome.
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Old 10-06-2012, 05:49 AM   #33 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)

Every match be a Bra and Panties Match, and every segment a bikini contest or strip tease

Main Event:
Live execution in the middle of the ring,
Likely candidates if the IWC had their way:
John Cena
Sheamus
Santino Marella
Brodus Clay
The Great Khali
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Old 10-06-2012, 07:01 AM   #34 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)

Vince Mcmahon comes out and announces:

Ladies and Gentleman, i myself am bored as shit of the product today, and thus, i don't care who the champions are, every SINGLE F**KING title is now vacated! Tonight we will have separate battle royals with the same superstars to determined who will be the next champion, just cause i feel like it.
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John Cena faces Undertaker at Wrestlemania [ ]

Sheamus and Cm Punk are the 2 World Champions [X] -Wrestlemania 28

John Morrison wins World Title [ ]

John Cena losses cleanly [X]- Wrestlemania 28 Rock Beats John Cena


John Cena turns heel [ ]

Shawn Michaels returns for One More Match[ ]

Daniel Bryan beats a Main Eventer cleanly [ ]

BTB:
http://www.wrestlingforum.com/booker...l#post10519764
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Old 10-06-2012, 07:23 AM   #35 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)


LMAO with every sentence XD ! this is gold bro !
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Old 10-06-2012, 07:25 AM   #36 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)

All they have to do is debut Dean Ambrose, saviour of the WWE.
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Old 10-06-2012, 07:33 AM   #37 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)

Ok I've used the "WF Official opinion collater" to accurately predict what will SAVE WWE!!! according the forum as a whole.


1. Have heels win every match, regardless of logic or how good they are.

2. After all the heels have won the matches, turn all the faces heel. Because heels rule and faces suck because they are PG. This will result in a mind warping time zone situation where every wrestler is a heel and must win every match.

3. Speaking of PG, have every match feauture random blade jobs and chair shots to the head. Coz that's what they did the Attitude Era.

4. At least 80% of every show should have CM Punk in the ring on his own talking.

5. Fire everyone who weighs over about 300 pounds, because they don't have good workrate like Tyson Kidd.
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Old 10-06-2012, 08:38 AM   #38 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)

Quote:
Originally Posted by A$AP View Post
Mid way through a divas match, Triple H just comes out and starts beating the shit out of like 4 of the Divas with his eyes closed.
Pedigrees for all.
Walks to the back with his eyes closed. Cameras follow him.
Goes into his locker room and back to sleep.
Cops are looking for Triple H in the arena while he's sleeping but Stephanie gets there first.
Wakes him up. He doesnt remember anything.
Every week, he assaults a different woman/group of women in his sleep.
This all leads to Stephanie getting him into a meeting with Dr. Some-generic-name-that-all-the-WWE-doctors-have. This ones a woman.
She consults him and asks him why he's been beating women in his sleep.
After a long pause, he opens his eyes, says that hes been awake all along and hits her with a sledge hammer!.
#SWERVE #RATINGS #TRIPLEHWOMANBEATER
LOOOOOOOOOOOL XD !
THIS WAS SO FUNNY TO ME DAMMIT !!
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Old 10-06-2012, 08:40 AM   #39 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)

Quote:
Originally Posted by CMojicaAce View Post
Main Event: John Cena on commentary as he announces a huge main event. Out comes none other than PRESIDENT OBAMA! He talks about how he is tired of that jackass Mitt Romney talking nonsense about him. He calls Mitt out. They cut a promo for the ages until, George W Bush comes out! He talks about how Obama stole his spotlight and how he banged Obama's wife. Obama slaps Bush. Out comes Vince Mcmahon. He tells how he will run for president in 2016. They all laugh. He declares that they have a No Holds Barred Match right then and there. They all agree. As the match is about to start, Vince announces the special guest referee: Big Dick Johnson. The match begins. Eventually, everyone is bleeding heavily, and Obama nails the Canadian Destroyer on Mitt and pins him. Obama celebrates as he points up to an American flag. Confetti falls down as Guile's theme song plays. Then, out of nowhere, Mario Balotelli comes out and hits the Rough Ryder on him. He celebrates like how he did against Germany as the camera focuses on him. Raw goes off the air.
LMFAO
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Old 10-06-2012, 09:29 AM   #40 (permalink)
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Default Re: How to give RAW the biggest ratings ever (Joke Thread)

Haha this thread is beginning to deliver.
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