This is not funny. Not one bit. There is no smile on my face. My expression is stern. My Nordic blood has been angered unto boiling.
You ruin the credibility of this section with such nonsense ramblings.
You can't hear me from wherever you are in Australia, but I am speaking these words as I type them, and my tone clearly suggests to the person next to me that he should move away before my rage envelops him. I may have to sacrifice several goats just to satisfy the bloodlust this disgrace of a rant has filled me with.
I would continue, but I fear that the utter seriousness with which I approach this will give me a stroke.