This is only for comedic purposes and not meant to be taken to heart.. so people flagging this as inapropriate, take a chill pill.
1. They refuse to accept the fact that most non-wrestling fans they encounter have never heard of CM Punk
2. They refuse to accept that CM Punk is not God.
3. They spam the Living Colour video of Cult of Personality with ''CM Punk sent me here!'' , much to the anoyance of In Living Colour fans that don't give a shit about wrestling.. and CM Punk
4. They hope science gets the steppin' on time travel so they can go back to the Wrestlemania 22 main event in Chicago and chant ''CM PUNK'' during both HHH and John Cena's entrances/match.
5. Since CM Punk got over, they now like to pretend like they've been supporting him as far back as his ROH days, when throughout 2010, barely anyone was complaining about Punk's lack of push.
6. They like to say 'pipebomb!' at the end of each sentence when they're 'shooting' on people IRL,
7. They think CM Punk is the next coming of Stone Cold, John F Kennedy and God.
8 When playing a WWE video game online, they get pissed that an opponent chose CM Punk before them, therefore creating their own CM Punk to prevent future tantrums.
9. They take criticism of CM Punk as personal insults
10. They think every town but Chicago sucks, unless a crowd outisde of Chicago is chanting for CM Punk
11. They dislike Zach Ryder deep down, but give him a free pass because CM Punk endorsed him at Comicon
12. They hate on their parents for not giving birth to them in Chicago
13. Even after hours of explanations, diagrams and helpful video learning guides, they still can’t understand why more people would sooner cheer and support Cena, Orton and HHH over CM Punk
14. Since CM Punk changed his theme song, they all of a sudden consider 80s music ''cool''
15. They get pissed when people ask them what the ''CM'' in CM Punk stands for, even though most of them don't really know themselves
16. Despite not having a damn clue who Colt Cabana is outside of a google search, they actively protest against his firing
17. They consider the Straight Edge Society the most underrated and overlooked stable of all time... even though at the time they didn't even bother watching Smackdown
18. They are campaigning to get ‘Cult of Personality' instated as the national anthem
19. Every Summer going forward will have to be the Summer of Punk, or it basically didn't exist,
20. They also turn their nose up at any wrestler active or retired that isn't CM Punk, unless said wrestler praised CM Punk on Twitter.
21.If one of their friends claim to enjoy wrestling, they quiz said friend on their knowledge of the life, career and influence of CM Punk before deciding whether to take their claim seriously
22. They stopped supporting Coca Cola products and switched to Pepsi.
23 They think Luke Gallow's firing was a grave injustice, yet they would always change the channel during his matches.
24. They think Beth Phoenix is the coolest diva to be banging CM Punk, therefore she is worthy of praise
25. They consider Maria Kanellis's only claim to fame is being ''the chick that dated CM Punk''.
26. They repeatedly write Good Humor-Breyers h and hassle/threaten them to get back into the WWF ice-cream business
27. if their entire wardrobe consisted of CM Punk t-shirts, they'd be happy and use that as bragging material to their friends
28. They no longer look down at short order Cooks at waffle house.
29. They think CM Punk is untouchable on the mic, and overlook the fact that his delivery is often monotonic and trite
30. They think CM Punk invented ''breaking kayfabe''
31. They think CM Punk got buried eveytime he loses a match, even though in said match he was booked to look very strong and/or got screwed due to outside interference
32. Their hatred for Randy Orton started with him beating Christian for the WHC, but the disdain intensified when they realized that he won every single match during his feud with CM Punk
33. If CM Punk isn't the WWE champion for more than a month, they conclude that WWE creative ''dropped the ball''
34. They rebeled against their parents all their lives for preventing them from doing drugs, but they now adhere to Straight edge-ism, and awarded their parents some brownie points
35. They think there's a real conspiracy backstage trying to hold Punk back.
36. They think that all of Punk's promos are a complete shoot.
37. They consider a CM Punk segment to be crap if Punk didn't get the upper hand.
38. They like to send their friends and familly members the MITB match, even though said people told them that they weren't interested.
39.. They think that CM Punk carried John Cena during all of their matches
40. They consider every CM Punk match to be flawless, and if for some reason the match was a botch fest, it was all the opponent's fault.
41. They have a tendency to randomly quote lines from CM Punk in totally unrelated conversations
42. They think all future WWE films should include CM Punk in the main roles
43. They consider the Killswitch Engage song ''this Fire burns to be nostalgic classic.
44. They would stalk Airports just to catch CM Punk when he lands.
45. they now think Dwayne Johnson's return this year was irrelevant because Punk's rise to main event status eclipsed all that.
46. They like to rewatch CM Punk segments on Youtube until fatigue hits and it isn't physically possible to stay awake
47. because of reason 46, they think sleep sucks, that it's completely unneeded and is proof that there's no such thing as ''intelligent design''
48. They think PPV buyrates should go through the roof now that CM Punk is main eventing
49. They think Miz and R Truth are steeling CM Punk's storyline
50. They refuse to aknowledge CM Punk's tenure in TNA, and they think it should be completely erased from the history books
51.Despite CM Punk resorting back to the status quo as of late, they'll still defend him thinking he's ushering in a cutting edge new product
52.They now hate ADR because his lack of crowd reaction makes his matches with Punk look bad
53. They dislike the whole roster because they're taking away from Punk's airtime
54. When they apply for a job, and their future boss asks them to sign a contract, they expect a table the table to be turned over
55. They think insomnia is cool because Punk doesn't sleep
56. They pressure RF and Kayfabecommentaries to secure a shoot interview with Punk even though he's currently under contract, and they regard his shoots with ROH as the greatest of all time.
60.They think Ashton Kutcher stole the line ''you got Punk'd!'' from CM Punk
61. The think Punk could legitimately run for office, and win
62. They think CM Punk is the new measuring stick of what a perfect wrestler should be, even though wrestlers that are more well rounded than he is wouldn't stand a chance as his equal
63. They now believe that the word ''ass'' is what was missing from the current product to make it good
65. They think him being follically challenged fits his image
66. They think WWE crowds should all be seen with white t-shirts, with no exceptions
67.Since ''CM Punk'' isn't a popular trending term, they threaten to boycott Twitter
68. They want the canceled script for the WWE serial killer movie involving CM Punk to be leaked on the internet, just so they can stick it Stephanie McMahon and her poor judge of character
69. Despite Punk being Champion, they still resent WWE creative for not putting him in the most important and relevant storylines
70. They tried to sue THQ for removing his Pepsi tattoo in the videogames
Again, this is only for the lulz, i'm actually one of the biggest Punk fans out there