Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady) - Wrestling Forum : WWE, TNA, Debate League, Wrestling Videos, Women of Wrestling Forums
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Old 12-09-2012, 11:59 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

Asenath finds out she can have sushi delivered to her home (what a concept), gets excited, makes thread, drops hints about how she does yoga so nobody will think she is a gluttonous fatty or anything:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Asenath View Post
I literally never have to EVER put on a pair of pants that doesn't have "Yoga" on the label ever again. YOU GUYS.

I may be a little more excited about this than is normal.
You only wear yoga pants because they have an elastic waistband. Most normal people enjoy having clothes that look good, maybe you'll find some one day.

Asenath explains the wonders of rimming (licking a person's asshole with your tongue):

Quote:
Originally Posted by Asenath View Post
There's more nerves in that part of the body - on men and women - than just about anywhere but the clitoris. And if everyone's nice and showered and hygienic, it's not any more dirty than the rest of the body.

And there are dental dams, in case you're really concerned. And if you can't find one of those, you can always cut open a non-lubricated condom and use that as a barrier for your tongue.
This post is the stuff of nightmares. Literally nothing I can say will matter so moving right along...

Asenath says creepy guys (please read the quotes above one more time for context) are the reason she will always be alone:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Asenath View Post
So, first of all, we all know the OP isn't going to do anything but be gross until his girlfriend realizes he's a Category 5 creeper and dumps him. It is, however, part of the reason why I am a future forever alone cat lady. The butt thread is the other reason. I don't like gender based assumptions, but damn.

If anyone intimated I should pay for babysitting with sex, I'd just shut that person out of my family's circle. That line gave me the wiggins. Ugh.
A response by Dr. Nicholas RUSH :

Quote:
Originally Posted by MILA KUNIS' CHRISTMAS EYES View Post
fairly certain they would prefer to be paid less if it meant you never said the word sex and you were fully covered up in a burka/niqab/hijab/whatever
Asenath wishes to plan complete strangers on the internet's weddings, think I saw an episode of Criminal Minds that started this way:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Asenath View Post
If you need any help throwing together a wedding so quickly, I like to think of myself as an armchair quarterback in the planning department. Holler at me for some totally non-professional advice.
Yes because the only wedding you're going to plan is someone else's. I suppose its better off you get your ideas out there because no guy is going to stick a ring on you. Actually your ideas include how to rim so might be better off to sit down and shut the fuck up.

This one is for the lucky fellas out there wondering how to attract an Asenath of their own:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Asenath View Post
Also, Thierry Mugler A*Men is like catnip to me. Prrrowr.
Bitch please, any guy speaking to you would get your panties dripping so much you could drown a toddler in them.

A final word from Asenath on what her life COULD BE:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Asenath View Post
And also, I'd be a makeout queen if I were surrounded by attractive people at the height of physical conditioning 300 days a year. The end.


Anything I say here will be even more of a cheapshot. So I'll bite my tongue, much like anyone you try to make out with so they can sneak away to get their tongue sown back on.

The end.
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:01 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

Misogynist.
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:01 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

Eww, she wears yoga pants?


HAD NO IDEA THEY MADE THEM IN SIZE ELEPHANT
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:02 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

my shit looks better
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:03 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

Quote:
Originally Posted by How the Roddy Stole Christmas View Post
Eww, she wears yoga pants?


HAD NO IDEA THEY MADE THEM IN SIZE ELEPHANT
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:05 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

.............Meh.
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:08 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

also the thing about creepers is ironic since she was defending bill demott having dudes to take naked stink faces in WWE developmental rings. also as for the put a ring on it bit you should've brought up they probably don't have rings for those sausage fingers. same reason oprah has never been married. i guess she could always use a rubber band.

anyway good rant CP. glad you finally nutted up.
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:11 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

Quote:
Originally Posted by SCRILLA CLAUS View Post
also the thing about creepers is ironic since she was defending bill demott having dudes to take naked stink faces in WWE developmental rings. also as for the put a ring on it bit you should've brought up they probably don't have rings for those sausage fingers. same reason oprah has never been married. i guess she could always use a rubber band.

anyway good rant CP. glad you finally nutted up.
except he really didn't
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Old 12-10-2012, 12:13 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

only semi related

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Old 12-10-2012, 12:18 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Asenath (or as she's known in the chatbox, creepy dental dam lady)

Chatbox?......What Chatbox?

Oh & ummmm...Why the sudden urge to go nuclear on the woman? lol
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