Vince gives me a comedy gimmick
Join Date: Jul 2008
Ridiculously long receipts
What is now with receipts?
I recently went to two stores-Home Depot and Shaws (Supermarket)
At Shaws I bought ONE item-at Home Depot 4. BOTH RECEIPTS WERE THE SAME LENGTH. They were nearly the length of my elbow to the tip of my middle finger.
Let's dissect the Home Depot shit-ball:
The Home Depot receipt at the top had a HUGE Home Depot logo. What the fuck-Am I going to FORGOT where I went?
Next was my itemized listed.. pretty small. Then a barcode. The next part was an excessively long warrantly explanation. What the fuck happened here? This used to be on the back. Turn it around--HOME DEPOT HOME DEPOT HOME DEPOT. Fuck.
Next up? "LIKE US ON FACEBOOK" with their WEBSITE address, facebook page, Twitter page and youtube page. No..I have NO IDEA the internet exists nor did i EVER think you fuckheads sell your shit online.
Long *********** line... then.,,
"Enter your chance to win a $500 gift card".
Bunch of more bullshit...including a code, a VERIFYING code, then another website offering discount windows whom HOME DEPOT sells their windows.
In fairness, the Shaws receipt had coupons on the back.. Coupons full of non-sensical fuck-poop like a $39 oil change, Free HBO for a Month for signing up for Dish Network, or the best one was an ad for Shaws Pharmacy-now with Generic Viagra. So if I can't pop a boner while watching HBO porn on Dish Network at 4am I can take some generic viagra and lube my car.
Is this required? I bought ONE item at Shaws-COFFEE. Whats the chances I return my K-Cup Breakast Blend coffee?
Excessively long receipts are bullshit.. Oh I should buy recyclable bags? For MONEY? How about not making my 4 item purchase a map to the Legend of Zelda in Hyrule.
Renew my subscription...bwhahahaha!!
Last edited by SP103; 11-26-2012 at 04:27 AM.