You all need to listen to me, and you all need to wrap your tiny, reptillian brains around the concept that I'm laying down. You see, when I joined this forum I was under the impression that it was because we were all wrestling fans. Because we shared a similar interest and wanted to talk peacefully about that interest in a civil and calm manner.
And me? I'm more than willing to do that. I hope you understand that, because I am a good person, I am an honest person, maybe the last honest man on this whole forum. I am the only one here who has the guts to tell you people the truth, to tell all of you the hard truths that you have hidden away from, retreating from reality behind a wall of scatalogical jokes and pornography.
Oh yes, the pornography. You didn't think I noticed, did you? Well, I did. I noticed how you leer over women, I noticed how you degrade them, rate them as if they were an object instead of a living, breathing creature. Do you know how pitiful it looks when you sit behind a wall of anonymity and insult a woman because of the size of her breasts or some imperfection that stops you from masterbating to her image? You are chauvinists, you are a fetid pool of sexist trash and if I had my way, each and every one of you would be violently penetrated in the fashion enjoyed by Socrates, Aristotle and all their heathen ilk.
Shame on you, shame on all of you. And shame on those who picked on a simple man, a kind man, a man with obvious learning difficulties who had absolutely no idea that you were ridiculing him. You think it's funny to pick on the mentally ill? You think it's brave and courageous to start a campaign of hatred against someone who does not have the wits to fight back? I think it's indicative of your vindictive, cowardly nature and serves as a withering condemnation of this entire forum.
Who do you think you are? Who do you think you are to humiliate someone who is far less fortunate and lucid than yourselves? I hope one day you see how disgusting your behaviour has been and on that day, upon reflecting on all the cute little sigs you made bearing his image and all the sniping jibes you made at his expense, I hope you vomit in your mouth and swallow the vomit, even though the taste of the vomit will only be one tenth of the bad taste that you have left in my mouth.
So, you like picking on people? You like easy targets? Well try it on me, try it on someone who is your intellectual superior, try it on a man who is more honest and sexually desirable to women than you will ever be. I am polite, cultured and can speak select phrases in German. I am the result of thousands of years of civilisation, whilst you all merely represent its regression into sexual depravity and the tragic days of the freak show.
I came to this forum hoping to find intelligent life, hoping against hope that I would finally find my equals, instead I am confronted by the same rampant idiocy I find rife in this Godless society you have all created. But I give you one last chance to prove that you are worthwhile human beings, otherwise I will be forced to further heap scorn upon you, your ancestors and any descendants you may infect with your polluted genes.
So in fifty words or less, I demand an explaination as to why the people of this forum deserve to live.