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Old 10-29-2011, 04:48 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default When everything is going right...

So yeah as I stated in a previous rant I think, I've been dating this girl for 2 and a half months roughly now and I'm completely happy with how things are. I make her happy, she makes me happy and we're always there for each other. But there are two problems. First she wants to start a family, already. I'm not ready to take on the responsibility of raising a child. But she doesn't seem to either get it or want to understand that.

She constantly brings up how good I am with kids, especially my nephew and a valid reason for having a child right now, but says I'm being selfish when I tell her the reason I'm so good with him is because he's not mine. I don't have the responsibility of having to plan my day around him, I don't have to worry if I have enough money to make sure he's taken care of the way he should be. And I don't have to wake up early because of him. I'm just not ready, and because she's pushing it so much I feel like we're going to slowly be pushed away from each other.

My other problem is my ex, the first girl I ever said I love you to, recently contacted me on facebook, which surprised me with how I ended things, saying she misses me and she realizes now she made a mistake with how she treated me and she wants me back. There are a few things wrong with this. First, I'm in a relationship with somebody else right now, second we both cheated on each other for the majority of our relationship, we both knew it, but we both knew the others meant nothing to us. Fuck when we started dating she was already seeing somebody else, like she is now too.

She keeps throwing in my face how we both loved each other, how I treated her so good and she took it for granted and now she wants a second chance to make up for the first time. She tells me all the time the last 3 months have been horrible for her relationship wise because the guy she's with isn't me.

Now I'm torn whether to stay with the girl I'm currently with because there is a trust wall there, I've never done anything to want to break that trust and she hasn't either, to the best of my knowledge and deal with the starting a family situation because other then that I love where things are going with her, but the thought of a baby, after just turning 23 that doesn't fit into my plans right now. Or do i go with my first love, because no matter how happy I am right now, I do still have feelings for her and I always will, but I don't know if it's worth all the trouble all over again. the way things ended was pretty bad too I said a lot of things I never should have said to her and i do at least want to apologize to her for that if nothing else.

Or the third option is to tell both of them I need some time to myself to think things over. This was my dad's idea, and the more I think about it the more it seems like the best option. It'll give me a chance to see what I want. Do I want to have a family, do I love her that much yet? Right now I don't feel like I do love her because we got together 2 weeks after I broke up with the other one or do I want to go back to what I used to have and take a chance that things will be different this time. My only fear with the third option is when I make up my mind neither one will want to be with me because i didn't give into them right away.
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Old 10-29-2011, 04:50 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: When everything is going right...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Styles View Post
I've been dating this girl for 2 and a half months .

Whoa brah.... thought you were gay
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Old 10-29-2011, 04:56 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: When everything is going right...

Whatever you do, don't go back to your ex for a relationship.
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Old 10-29-2011, 04:59 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: When everything is going right...

I don't see why you need time to think anything over, seems pretty damn obvious to me what to do. Forget about the ex, that sounds like a horrible choice all-around. What you need to do is tell the chick you've only been seeing for less than 3 months she needs to hit the damn breaks. Already talking about kids? Fucking hell. If she doesn't like it then you're better off cutting ties and looking elsewhere (NOT THE EX-GIRLFRIEND).
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Old 10-29-2011, 05:01 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: When everything is going right...

If you really need to ask what to do in this situation, you're a fucking idiot.

It's quite clear that the ex is a fucking loser who is just saying what you want to hear to she can take you for another ride. She cheated before, she is cheating now, she will cheat again.

Bitch has AIDS, keep the clean, new girl.
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Old 10-29-2011, 05:04 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: When everything is going right...

Bitches ain't nothing but hoes and tricks, man.
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Old 10-29-2011, 05:11 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: When everything is going right...

Oh I've seen this rant before
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Old 10-29-2011, 05:29 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: When everything is going right...

Quote:
Originally Posted by CamillePunk View Post
I don't see why you need time to think anything over, seems pretty damn obvious to me what to do. Forget about the ex, that sounds like a horrible choice all-around. What you need to do is tell the chick you've only been seeing for less than 3 months she needs to hit the damn breaks. Already talking about kids? Fucking hell. If she doesn't like it then you're better off cutting ties and looking elsewhere (NOT THE EX-GIRLFRIEND).
See I know it seems quick to a lot of people, but with our core group of friends, everybody had a child early in their relationship, my best friend and his girlfriend got pregnant 2 weeks into their relationship, 2 of my friends waited like 2 months and the other guys actually lasted 5 months I think before they got pregnant. I've known this girl for 4 years, the one I'm with now, she knew everything that went on with my ex, she was really my shoulder to lean on for those 6 months I guess you can say. I never did anything with her while I was with my ex, but she knew about the other girls, and as soon as I broke up with my ex, I think like 3 days after she told me about her feelings, we talked about it for like a week and decided it was worth giving it a shot, I told her I'd never cheat on her and I meant it. So maybe things could work out, but she needs to understand where I am in my life, I don't have time for a child right now. I'm interested in getting out there and having fun, getting drunk on the weekends I see how my friends with kids are, they can hardly ever come out and enjoy themselves and right now I don't want to become like that. I'm young, still a little immature I think in the sense I'd rather have fun with my girlfriend and not have to have the burden of responsibility of a child right now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Catalanotto View Post
If you really need to ask what to do in this situation, you're a fucking idiot.

It's quite clear that the ex is a fucking loser who is just saying what you want to hear to she can take you for another ride. She cheated before, she is cheating now, she will cheat again.

Bitch has AIDS, keep the clean, new girl.
It's not like she was the only one cheating, I was heating too. I was cheating because to me there was no trust in the relationship. How could I trust somebody who got with me while they were with somebody else, or took me on an emotional roller coaster ride for 12 months (we dated for 6 but were a thing for a year) you know telling me she wanted to be with me, then we needed to be friends cause she was happy with her boyfriend, then she wanted me, then she loved somebody else, then she hated all guys, then she loved me, she wanted to be with me, I was the one for her, then we needed to be friends, and it all got to the point where it became too much for me and after knowing her for 4 months I was sleeping with other girls. From day one of our relationship we both cheated on the other, and we both knew it, but we cared about each other and we knew we had each other at the end of the day, and that's what's going through my mind right now is the fact she really was my first love, as fucked up as it sounds, the relationship had so many bumps and unnecessary hurdles to overcome and I felt we did over come them.

Part of me wants to give her another chance because these are things I've never heard from her before, I've never heard her tell me I was the one she wanted to be with forever, it was always I was the one she wanted to be with right now because we both weren't mature enough to realize what we were doing to the other one was wrong, no matter if at the end of the day, after sleeping with somebody else we went home to see each other, and part of me feels I owe it to myself and to her to at least give her another try.

And yes I know people on here are going to think I'm being naive, or an idiot in believing anything she has to say, but she's apologized for cheating on me, and for putting me on that roller coaster and I do believe that she wants to give it an honest chance this time.

But I just don't know if it's worth giving up what I have with the other girl to give her a second chance.

Rereading that post, I think I answered my own question. (highlighted the part that answered my question so people don't think I'm gonna go back to my ex)
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Old 10-29-2011, 05:33 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: When everything is going right...

If you have no trust, why would you bother? The answer should have been very obvious and if you both were cheating, you both clearly didn't want to be in the relationship (though I don't see how you cheating was suppose to be positive in any way, nor help the situation).

Good luck with the new chick, she sounds like a much better catch.
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Old 10-29-2011, 05:33 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: When everything is going right...

hopefully all these women have accepted God as their saviour before you allow them into your life.
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