Largest arms in the world, BROTHER!
Join Date: Dec 2004
Re: Official DVD/Match/Show Discussion Thread
OK, I did this in the TNA thread and I'll do it here for WWE.
The Top Ten Worst PPV Matches of 2012. Now for TNA I actually had a little bit of trouble because most of the bad PPV matches were mostly blasse. I didn't feel like there were any matches that were stunningly awful to the point that I'll remember them a decade later because of how bad they were.
Fortunately (or unfortunately, I don't know) I did not have that problem with WWE as I knew right where to go for most of the spots. They gave us some shiny turds this year, some of them high profile matches.
So here we go, the Top Ten Worst WWE PPV Matches of 2012!
10) Daniel Bryan Vs. Sheamus: World Championship at Wrestlemania XXVIII = I'll be honest, I actually laughed my ass off when they did this 18 second match at Wrestlemania. I knew the IWC rage was going to be insanely high and the thought gave me the giggles. I didn't care about the match to begin with for a lot of the same reasons that I don't care about most World Title matches in general, but an 18 second opener just made me "And the point of this was what exactly?". I usually say there doesn't need to be two World Titles, this match sort of justifies my stance.
9) The 2012 Royal Rumble Match = "It will be the end of the World as you know it" That one statement from Jericho instantly peaked my interest for the Royal Rumble PPV event. I thought "what does he mean?" "is he going to go after Punk?" "is there some other shock that I can't even think of?". With Jericho in the Rumble match itself, I thought for sure he would win it and then close the show with whatever it was he hinted at with his statement. But no, Sheamus just won and that was that. Nothing interesting happened at all. So the thing I tuned in for turned out to be a wasted opportunity and the rest of the match felt empty as well. It felt like they just loaded it with guys to get nostalgia pops (Hacksaw, Road Dogg, etc.), bad comedy entrants, & guys whose names I couldn't remember. And they also did a bad job with the marathon man spot as Cody & Miz lasted the longest and I forgot they were out there half the time.
8) Cody Rhodes Vs. The Big Show: Intercontinental Championship at Wrestlemania XXVIII = The ending to this one pissed me off more than Sheamus/Bryan did. And the sad thing is, I knew in my gut that it was coming. So they build up Cody as IC Champion and actually give him something interesting to do by mocking Big Show's Wrestlemania history. They could have taken that throughout the year and with future opponents until Cody suffered his defeat at the hands of a new star or a hot babyface (Ryback anyone?). But no, Big Show has to have his Wrestlemania moment. So great, instead of running with a strong heel champion, you gave Big Show the belt in a match that nobody is going to remember in 5 years. And the sad thing is, the rematch at Extreme Rules was booked exactly how this match should have been. So I thought "OK, maybe they can salvage this" but no, they just had him drop it to Christian the next PPV completely out of the blue. Whatever.
7) John Cena Vs. The Big Show: Steel Cage Match at No Way Out 2012 = So lets turn Big Show heel, make him a monster again, and then have him lose his first match right off the bat. That's a good idea! It just cemented how pointless the Big Show turn was as they just had Cena beat him for the 80th time. The match itself was boring and slow and featured more overbooking than I care to recount here. It was just an exercise in pointlessness.
6) Eve Torres Vs. Layla Vs. Kaitlyn: Divas Title at Hell in a Cell 2012 = I usually don't pay much attention to the divas matches. Yeah they are typically bad, but they are unimportant filler, so who cares? But this one seemed really bad. It was pretty sloppy and centered around a storyline that I just couldn't bother to care about.
5-3) Sheamus Vs. Alberto Del Rio: World Championship Matches from Money in the Bank, Summerslam, & Night of Champions = So not only do I just flat out not care about these guys' characters, but in the ring, they clearly have no chemistry. These matches were just flat out boring. There isn't any other way to say it. I fell asleep during the Money in the Bank match and the Summerslam match featured a very stupid finish that only served to frustrate me because I knew it meant at least one more match was coming. By the time they did their third match, I was just ready for it to be done.
2) Santino Marella Vs. Ricardo Rodriguez: Tuxedo Match at No Way Out 2012 = When I saw this on paper, I thought that it was either going to be hilarious, or it was going to be a complete disaster. There was no middle ground. Sure enough, it was a disaster. It was unfunny, it came off poorly, and only served to reinforce my belief that WWE can't do comedy.
1) John Cena Vs. John Laurinaitis at Over the Limit 2012 = They closed out a PPV with this. I am dead fucking serious. Not only did I not care for the story at all whatsoever (it was about as awful a rehash of Austin/McMahon as you can possibly have) but the stakes meant nothing to me. As I've said before, I don't care at all who is in charge of the show and I feel modern wrestling companies spend way too much time dealing with authority figure character. All of that aside, the match was just bad slapstick from start to finish and featured one of the most obvious "see it coming a mile away" turns ever and it only served to continue this story that I didn't give two shits about to begin with.