Re: Bah Gawd - Good Ol' JR's Impact Wrestling
The show begins with no pyro or anything really special. The camera simply pans over the capacity crowd as they cheer loudly. Eventually the camera settles on Mike Tenay and Jeremy Borash who welcomes everyone to tonight’s broadcast. The company has hit the reset button and now tonight we start from square one and what better way to kick things off than by an address from Impact Wrestling’s new President, Good Ol’ JR, Jim Ross.
Ring announcer Christy Hemme introduces JR who gets an unbelievable reaction from the crowd in the Asylum. JR pauses briefly at the top of the ramp to acknowledge the crowd but he doesn’t waste time, he soon heads straight for the ring. Once in the ring, Christy hands him a microphone.
JR starts off by welcoming everyone who’s in attendance tonight as well as those who are watching at home. He thanks them for their patience over these last several months as this company regrouped. It’s been a long and bumpy road for everybody involved and he can’t thank the fans enough. The crowd once again erupts in applause. He says that Impact Wrestling has not given up on its goal of becoming the biggest and most successful wrestling company in the world, they are just going to do it a different way now, by not trying to recreate the past. JR continues on but eventually he is interrupted by the music of Bully Ray.
Oddly enough, Bully Ray comes out to the ring to the old Aces & Eights music instead of previous theme song. Bully also still has his woman, Brooke Tessmacher, firmly in tow.
Bully gets in the ring and gets right into the face of JR. Bully tells him how dare he come in and ruin what Bully had. Bully was the world champion, running the show with his gang Aces & Eights, and now that JR comes in, all that goes right out the window. Before Bully can do anything, he is stopped by the music of Bobby Roode. JR, Bully, and Brooke all turn around to see Bobby Roode and his E.G.O. stable mates Chris Daniels and Kazarian, standing at the top ramp. Bobby says that yes, all of what Bully said was true, he was the world champion, he did run the show, but that was all in the past. Now that the Aces & Eights are no more, the Main Event Mafia is no more, Dixie Carter is gone, Hulk Hogan, everybody, there’s no one to stop the Extraordinary Gentleman’s Organization from taking their right place atop Impact Wrestling as well as the entire wrestling world. Bobby finishes his statement by saying that he can’t wait to go through Bully Ray to get it either. Bully then tries to taunt E.G.O. to come and face him in the ring but they don’t and the segment ends with a stare down between the two parties.
Transitioning away from the ring area, we go backstage where new Impact Wrestling backstage interviewer Taryn Terrell is standing by with the Bro-Mans, Robbie E and Jessie G.
Taryn starts off the interview by simply asking the Bro-Mans what they hope to accomplish in this new Impact Wrestling? Robbie E says it’s the perfect opportunity for underdogs such as themselves to gain a footing and make a mark because everybody is on the same level. Jessie G then steps in and says no, not everyone is on the same level, the Bro-Mans are on a different level, a level only for them, a level of total awesomeness. Robbie E agrees and the two begin hyping each other up by telling each other just how awesome they are, etc., etc. Taryn tries to get a word in but can’t before the Bro-Mans step off camera.
Match #1: Bro-Mans (Robbie E & Jessie G) vs. D.O.C. & Knux
Coming back from commercial, already in the ring are Knux and making his return to Impact Wrestling, D.O.C. The Bro-Mans come out to the ring all excited until they turn and see who they have to face. They attempt to run away but D.O.C. and Knux chase them down and drag them back into the ring.
D.O.C. and Knux first choose to pick on Robbie E, while Jessie G cowers in fear in the corner. D.O.C. and Knux wisely keep Robbie E in their corner, away from Jessie G because they know the first time he gets an opportunity, he’s running and tagging in Jessie G. They were proved right. The smaller Robbie E is able to squeeze out of D.O.C. and Knux’s grip and run to his corner to tag in Jessie G. As expected, Jessie doesn’t want to enter the match anymore than Robbie does, so the two begin arguing. The arguing ends when Knux grabs Jessie and tosses him to the other side of the ring. Jessie fares a little better in the ring against these two monsters due to his slight strength advantage over Robbie E but it’s not enough to save him or the match. Jessie tries to fight back but it’s ultimately too much, eventually succumbing to a power bomb and the 1, 2, 3.
Winners: D.O.C. & Knux
An impressive showing by the two former Aces & Eights enforcers and a less than impressive showing by the Bro-Mans who argue with each other all the way back to the locker room.
Transitioning away from the ring area, the cameras go to the back where we see a car pulling up. Out of the car steps the returning Olympic Gold Medalist, Kurt Angle. The world is waiting to hear what major announcement Kurt has and how it will affect himself as well as Impact Wrestling going forward. Stay tuned.
Coming back from commercial, the lights go out in the Asylum as Kurt Angle’s theme music begins to play. As Kurt makes his way out of the entrance tunnel the lights come back on and the crowd goes wild. Faint chants of “welcome back” are heard. Kurt, who’s return from rehab was postponed due to the sale of the company, is finally coming back and with an important message too. He steps into the ring and is immediately handed a microphone.
Kurt waits for the crowd level to go down before he begins to speak. Kurt basically parrots what JR said earlier about Impact Wrestling, except this time it’s about himself. Kurt thanks his fans for supporting him through his time in rehab as well as well as continuing to wait patiently as his return to the ring got pushed back. Kurt then shifts gears and talks about how when he was in rehab, the realization hit him that he’s getting up there in age and that he may not have much time left in the ring, at least at the level that he’s become used to. He says the last thing he ever wants to do is become another one of those wrestling legends who is forced to wrestle in front of ten people at some high school gym. He’s going to continue wrestling at his best, until “the time comes”. Once it comes, it’ll be over for him. Kurt then drops the microphone and exits the ring.
An odd promo from Kurt Angle for sure. He gave no real announcement other than when the time comes; it’ll be over for him. Whenever “that time” is only Kurt knows.
The show then quickly transitions away from the ring area to a video package of “The Cowboy” James Storm. The Cowboy talks about how he’s been one of the toughest people in the wrestling world for a long time now but it’s now time to prove it. He’s officially on a mission to prove that he is indeed the toughest S.O.B. in the wrestling world, past and present and it all starts tonight when he takes on Hernandez.
Match #2: Hernandez w/ Chavo Guerrero vs. James Storm
Coming back from commercial, we see Hernandez and his tag team partner Chavo Guerrero making their way to the ring. The crowd doesn’t seem too interested in these two, only giving them a luke warm reaction. That all changes when “The Cowboy’s” music begins to play. The crowd again erupts when James Storm steps out of the entrance tunnel, beer in hand. He downs the beer and proceeds to make his way to the ring to face Hernandez.
Early on in the match both men appear very evenly split. Each is about the same size and although Hernandez might be the strongest, it’s not by a whole lot. The match very quickly transitions into more of a stiff, psychical style, each man trying to out-muscle the other. Hernandez does have the slight advantage, having Chavo Guerrero in his corner, giving him tips and advice. Hernandez uses his slight strength advantage to slowly but surely wear down James Storm. This proves to be an effective strategy for him, since it appears that Storm is losing strength by the second. He ends up misjudging his opponent however. Once he feels he has Storm down enough, he decides to try and put him away. Hernandez lines him up for the Border Toss. But when he gets Storm up, Storm begins to fight his way out. Storm gets back on his feet and the match is back to begin even again. After a brief back and forth, Hernandez turns around for just one second and when he comes back, Storm hits him out of nowhere with the Last Call super kick, knocking him out right away. Storm covers him and gets the 1, 2, 3!
Winner: James Storm
Storm chooses to celebrate his victory with yet another beer. As Chavo helps Hernandez out of the ring, Storm enjoys his beer as the crowd cheers him on. Once Storm is done he begins heading towards the back. However, before he completely reaches the back, the lights mysteriously begin flickering on and off, and not by accident either. Nobody, including Storm, seems to know what’s going on so he simply shrugs it off and finishes heading towards the back.
Before the commercial break and the main event to follow, we get a backstage segment in the E.G.O. locker room. Bobby Roode is warming up for his match against Bully Ray and Chris Daniels and Kazarian are trying to cheer him on. As they are offering tips, Roode stops them. He tells them that they better not ruin anything for him or there’s going to be hell to pay. This match is about him, not them. Afraid, Kaz and Daniels promise to not screw anything up. Roode then finishes lacing up his boots and heads out the door. Kaz and Daniels soon follow after.
Match #3: Bobby Roode w/ Chris Daniels & Kazarian vs. Bully Ray w/ Brooke Tessmacher
It is now main event time. Tonight’s main event features two former TNA World Heavyweight Champions in Bully Ray and Bobby Roode. Both are looking to establish themselves as the top guy in the new Impact Wrestling by getting a win tonight. First out to the ring was the last TNA World Heavyweight Champion, Bully Ray, followed as always by Brooke Tessmacher. Next up is Bobby Roode, who steps out of the entrance tunnel alone first but he is soon followed by his E.G.O. partners, Chris Daniels and Kazarian.
Once the bell sounds, both men explode, trying to gain that first strike. Bully gains the advantage first but it doesn’t last long as Bobby fights his way out. This match goes back and forth, switching off between Bully dominating and then Bobby dominating. This doesn’t change until the match spills out to the outside. On the outside of the ring, trying to babysit Kaz and Daniels while fighting off Bully Ray proves to be too much of a challenge for Bobby Roode. Bully uses everything on the outside to his advantage, from the steel steps to the guard rails, to even his girlfriend Brooke, distracting Kaz and Daniels so they didn’t try to interfere. Bully is very much in the zone as well as in the driver’s seat. However, once the match goes back into the ring, things start to turn differently. No longer able to exploit the outside, Bully loses his grip on the match, allowing Bobby to fight his way back in. Although Bobby fights his way back a little, he’s still not able to gain back control of the match. This makes Bully feel a little cocky. He decides prematurely to try and attempt a Bubba Bomb. He gets Roode up but Bobby has some fight left in him, and he wiggles his way out. After yet another back and forth, Bobby tries to hit his own finisher, the Double R spine buster but he also fails. It now appears that whoever can hit their finisher first will win. Bobby tries, and fails, Bully tries, and fails, neither can seem to get it. Bobby Roode then gets an idea. When the two are on the ground, he quickly latches in a crossface on Bully, directly in the middle of the ring. Bully fights to get to the rope but with all his mite, Bobby pulls him back. Bully reaches and reaches but he can’t quite get to it. He is forced to tap.
Winner via Submission: Bobby Roode
Bobby quickly exits the ring and is joined in celebration by his E.G.O. friends, Kaz and Daniels. Brooke checks on her man who staggers to his feet. The show fades to black as each man once again stares each other down.