Re: Bah Gawd - Good Ol' JR's Impact Wrestling
Impact Wrestling opens up with a long look at all the action from last week’s one and a half hour long live special. Since there is too much to cover in just a short opening video, we only see the highlights of the show, starting with Alex Shelley returning to defeat Chris Sabin and become the new Television Champion. Then to the tag team title match where it was revealed that Gunner was the one taunting James Storm as well as being on the side of D.O.C. & Knux, since in the process he helped them win the tag titles. Then highlights of a very physical triple threat match for the world title between Bully Ray, Jeff Hardy, and Magnus with Bully Ray once again becoming world champion. The video finishes up with a look at the Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Jarrett match where Sting made his shocking return to Impact Wrestling, saving Kurt Angle from a further beat down at the hands of the Jarretts. That’s where we start off tonight because soon the video finishes up so the show can begin.
Panning over the entire Asylum, the cameras eventually settle back down on to the announce desk where Mike Tenay and Jeremy Borash welcome everyone to another edition of Impact Wrestling. Since there were no matches announced before the show, there is no card to run down so Mike and JB simply start talking about all the new champions in Impact Wrestling. Before they can finish however, they are interrupted by the theme music of Jeff Jarrett.
Jeff, followed closely behind by his wife Karen, comes out to the ring clearly not happy. Not only did he lose his match last week but he was not able to finish the job of taking out Kurt Angle completely because of the return of “The Icon” Sting. Once the Jarretts arrive in the ring they obviously ask for a microphone.
Jeff does not mention Sting at all, choosing instead to completely ignore him all together and focus on Kurt Angle who he feels stole a victory from him. Since Jeff is Impact Wrestling Vice President, he could fire Kurt Angle on the spot for disrespecting him like he did but he knows the backlash of that would be huge so he’s chosen a different path. Instead, Jeff wants a rematch. He is not asking for this match, he is demanding it. He says that if Kurt Angle does not come out to the ring tonight to face him for a rematch, he will then have cause to fire him and he certainly will not hesitate to do so. The crowd boos this immensely but Jeff doesn’t care, he is giving Kurt Angle thirty seconds to come out to this ring and face him otherwise he will be fired. Ten seconds go by, no Kurt Angle. Twenty seconds go by, still no Kurt Angle. 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, no Kurt Angle. Right as Jeff is about to channel his inner Vince McMahon and say Kurt Angle, you’re fired!, Sting’s theme music hits. The crowd goes insane as the Icon slowly makes his way down to the ring. Sting tells him that Kurt cannot answer his call because he’s not here tonight, he’s at home recuperating from the attack that Jeff and Karen put on him. Jeff continues to seem disinterested in Sting and continues to try and call out Kurt Angle. Sting gets more and more in to Jeff’s face, telling him that Kurt is not here. At this point Jeff is really angry and starts confronting Sting directly. He tells him to plain stay out of his business otherwise he will be fired. This doesn’t bother Sting at all, he remains right in Jeff’s face. Pretty soon Jeff changes his mind. Instead of wanting to face Kurt Angle again, he challenges Sting to a match tonight which of course, Sting agrees. Huffing and puffing away, the Jarretts then exit the ring as their music plays in the background. Soon after that the camera cuts away.
Before cutting to commercial Impact Wrestling cameras catch the new world tag team champions D.O.C. and Knux arriving at the Asylum on the motorcycles but they are not alone. Also arriving with him on a motorcycle is Gunner. The three men park their bikes and head inside as the camera cuts to commercial.
Coming back from commercial, we see the new T.V. champion Alex Shelley talking directly to the camera.
Alex is telling the camera man and the world that now that he is T.V. champion, he intends to be a fighting champion that means he intends to defend the title as much as possible, starting next week live on Spike T.V. Once Alex finishes his announcement, he starts walking away from the camera. Before he can get too far however, he is jumped from behind by Chris Sabin, his former tag team partner who he beat to become T.V. champion. Luckily for Alex, the two are not fighting for very long when Impact Wrestling security break the two up. Shouting at each other, Chris Sabin challenges Alex to a rematch for the title next week, which in the heat of the moment, he agrees to. Once the two have been pulled far enough apart, the show can transition back to the ring area.
Coming back to the ring area, we see the tag champs D.O.C. & Knux as well as their new partner Gunner standing in the middle of the ring and Gunner has a microphone.
Gunner starts off by saying that James Storm wanted to prove that he was the toughest S.O.B. in professional wrestling today but he was proven wrong. Gunner, D.O.C., and Knux are the toughest S.O.B.’s in professional wrestling and there isn’t a damn thing that anybody can do about it. To prove that, he is calling out anyone from the back, besides James Storm of course, anyone who may want to get a beating. It isn’t long before someone answers the call and that someone is Jeff Hardy.
Match #1: Gunner w/ D.O.C. & Knux vs. Jeff Hardy
Gunner seems surprised that of all the people that would answer his challenge it would be Jeff Hardy but hey, that doesn’t bother him at all because he has the massive tag team champions to back him up. Jeff enters the ring, the referee calls for the bell, and the match can begin.
Almost instantly, Jeff Hardy takes command of the match. Despite feeling extremely confident, Gunner does not seem prepared at all which isn’t much of a surprise since he had no idea who is opponent was going to be. Still, he doesn’t appear to have been prepared at all for any match against anybody. With encouragement from his friends on the outside, Gunner does manage to start fighting his way back in to the match ever so slightly, at least to the point where it’s not embarrassing him anymore. Jeff clearly knows that his high paced, aerial offense is the key to keeping Gunner confused and off of his game so he keeps that going. Gunner has no answer for Jeff so he must rely on his friends on the outside once again. While the referee is slightly distracted, and while Jeff is climbing to the top turnbuckle, D.O.C. pushes him off and back into the ring which allows Gunner a temporary window of opportunity to take advantage. Gunner does but his window is not open for very long. Despite the outside interference from earlier, Jeff fights back and regains control of the match. Once again Gunner is in need of help and once again the help comes when Jeff returns to the top turnbuckle. This time Knux tries to push him off but when he does the referee sees it and immediately calls for the bell, Gunner has been disqualified.
Winner via DQ: Jeff Hardy
D.O.C. and Knux immediately enter the ring and join Gunner in arguing with the referee. To his credit, the referee stands his ground and does not back down. This isn’t too smart on the referee’s part however as D.O.C. and Knux soon get tired of dealing with him so they simply toss the referee to the side and set their sights on Jeff Hardy. Luckily for Jeff, before they can do anything, James Storm comes running down the ramp and D.O.C, Knux, and Gunner scatter. James helps Jeff to his fight and once he’s back up, the two stare down D.O.C., Knux, and Gunner as the camera cuts to commercial.
Coming back from commercial, Impact Wrestling transitions to the backstage interview area where Taryn Terrell is standing by with all three members of E.G.O., Christopher Daniels, Kazarian, and Bobby Roode.
Taryn starts off the interview by asking the obvious question, where does E.G.O. go now that they’ve lost out on both the tag team and world titles? Daniels and Kazarian are the first to speak. They give the standard answer of how they are disappointed that they fell short in their attempt at the gold but they’re not giving up, that Bad Influence will soon have gold around their delicious waists yet again. When Taryn turns to Bobby Roode, he doesn’t seem too talkative. As a matter of fact, he doesn’t say anything at all for the first few seconds. When he finally does, he asks Bad Influence how they can live with themselves after being such losers. Bobby’s comments take them off guard and they’re not quite sure how to respond. Bobby says that not only did they not prevent Bully Ray from becoming world champion again, they couldn’t even win the stickin’ tag team titles. Kazarian is the first to take offense to Bobby’s statements saying that at least they made it to the tag team finals, when the same sure can’t be said about Bobby and the world title. He also seems to remember that Bobby wasn’t much of a help either in preventing Bully Ray from becoming champion, as a matter of fact he was just as responsible as anybody. That statement seemed to have set something off in Bobby’s brain as immediately he attacks Kazarian, tossing him through a monitor directly behind them, knocking him out. This leaves just him and Christopher Daniels alone to fight it out. Slowly the brawl starts to go away from the backstage interview area and down the hallway, then into the entrance tunnel, then out of the entrance tunnel and down the ramp.
The brawl between Daniels and Roode has now spilled out in to the ring area. Impact Wrestling security attempt to break the two up but every time they do, they find their way back to fighting and the process repeats itself. Finally one referee steps in and says he’s had enough. If they’re insistent on fighting, then it might as well be made official. The referee then calls for a bell and the impromptu brawl becomes an impromptu match.
Match #2: Bobby Roode vs. Christopher Daniels
Now an official match, the two keep on fighting on the outside of the ring. They have now moved close to the ring, battling against the guard rails. No one man has the advantage but initially Bobby Roode does seem to be the one in control of the pace of the fight. Despite controlling the pace, Bobby doesn’t seem too interested in putting Christopher Daniels away, rather he seems content inflicting as much pain as possible. Although he has control, the longer he lets Christopher Daniels stay up right, the worse things could potentially get for him. Every once in a while Daniels will get a burst of energy and fight back, evening the odds a little but soon Bobby stops it. This pattern repeats itself several times before Bobby finally does realize that he needs to take more punishing measures if he wants to take out Daniels for good. He begins to repeatedly whip Daniels into the steel steps, back first as well as the guard rails. With Daniels severely crippled, Bobby looks to put him away. Sliding a steel chair in to the ring, Bobby tosses Daniels in there as well. Despite pleas from the referee, everyone knows what Bobby is about to do. He lines up Daniels with the steel chair and hits a powerful Double R spine buster, slamming Daniels down back first onto the steel chair. Initially the referee does not start counting the pin but after threats from Bobby Roode, he starts counting 1, 2, 3.
Winner: Bobby Roode
Bobby Roode stands over the now crippled body of his former stable mate as the referee reluctantly raises his hand in victory. With both members of Bad Influence taken out, at least at the moment, Bobby Roode will have to go about the process of trying to regain the world title by himself. As Bobby begins to exit the ring he is stopped in his tracks by the sight of the new Impact Wrestling world champion Bully Ray and his girlfriend Brooke standing at the top of the entrance ramp. As the camera cuts to commercial, we see a shot of Bobby and Bully staring each other down as Bully holds the world title high above his head.
Match #3: Jeff Jarrett w/ Karen Jarrett vs. Sting
It is now main event time. In a match that was made at the beginning of the broadcast, “The Icon” Sting returns to Impact Wrestling to face “The King of the Mountain” Jeff Jarrett. Standing up for Kurt Angle who was injured last week at the hands of the Jarretts, Sting stepped in and answered Jeff’s challenge. First man out to the ring is Jeff Jarrett, followed closely by his wife Karen. The crowd boos Jeff loudly which only serves to piss him off. Once Sting’s music hits however the crowd goes nuts which angers Jeff even more. When Sting enters the ring, Jeff immediately attacks him as the referee calls for the bell.
Jeff Jarrett has the obvious advantage here in that he is not only Impact Wrestling vice president, but this is Sting’s first match in several months so he is a little rusty. Jeff has complete control of the match for some time because of it, taking advantage of Sting’s rustiness. Despite having control, Jeff does not do enough to limit Sting so as the match goes on, Sting starts to gain more and more strength and shed off some of the rust that was plaguing him earlier. Now that Sting has fought his way in to the match, Jeff starts to panic. He becomes reckless with his move set, trying to think of anything that will help him gain back control. He can’t think of anything conventional so he does the next best thing, he uses his power. Threatening the referee with termination if he disqualifies him, Jeff begins playing dirty, hitting Sting with low blows as well as exposed turnbuckles. The referee has no choice but to simply look the other way as Jeff starts to cheat his way to victory. Despite Jeff’s cheating, Sting does not go down without a fight. He kicks out of every pin attempt and even manages to hit a few moves here and there. Since Sting isn’t going down easy, Jeff decides to use his other secret weapon, his wife. Karen gets Sting’s attention. When Sting goes to confront Karen, she throws some sort of powder in his face which must have blinded Sting. Jeff takes immediate advantage, getting Sting in position and hitting The Stroke soon after. With the Jarretts yelling at him, the referee then gets down and counts 1, 2, 3.
Winner: Jeff Jarrett
Following the match, Karen enters the ring and celebrates with her husband like they just won a major, hard fought match when in reality Jeff used his powers as Impact Wrestling vice president to get the victory. Now that he realizes he can do nearly anything, what’s next for Jeff Jarrett? The camera fades to black while the Jarretts remain celebrating in the ring.