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Old 04-30-2013, 05:02 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default World Russo Entertainment



I was planning on continuing with WWE the Sitcom, but until I have enough ideas to go full-fledged with it, I feel like going a slightly more serious route. WELCOME TO THE RUSSO ERA.

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Midnight. April 29th. Raw has gone off the air one hour, and is fuming with how the show went. Alone in his dark office after everyone else has left the arena, Vince stares at his 1980s cellphone. There's only one man who can fix this mess, the man he swore he'd never call again...
More to come.
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Old 05-01-2013, 09:51 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: World Russo Entertainment

Let me guess... It's Eric Bischoff? no wait... it's BOB BARKER?
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Old 05-01-2013, 10:49 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: World Russo Entertainment

Oh man this may be even better
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Old 05-01-2013, 11:13 AM   #4 (permalink)
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I am looking forward to this, I enjoyed WWE:The Sitcom, so this should be good.
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Old 05-01-2013, 05:41 PM   #5 (permalink)
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The moment you've all been waiting for. The man Vince McMahon decided to pick up the phone and call was none other than...JIM CROCKETT. SWERVE!

Nah, the person he called was Vince Russo, just thought I'd set the tone already

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PRESS CONFERENCE HOSTED BY VINCE ON WWE.COM

: We here at the WWE feel that Monday Night Raw has been lacking EXCITEMENT in recent months, and I have decided that drastic measures need be taken. So without further ado, I introduce to you the man I have brought back to the WWE to shake this company up....VINCE RUSSO

: wwe.com? If you want to hear my thoughts, buy my latest RF video shoot, it's only the 14th I've done this year. I'm not hear to talk a whole bunch of hyperbole and bull, I just want you all to know RIGHT NOW that I GUARANTEE YOU that today is the day that the WWE became current once again in modern culture, today shall henceforth be known as VINCE RUSSO DAY. Starting this Monday night on Raw, I will show you all exactly what a world created by Vince Russo looks like. Thank you.
So, I'm not going to write this as a straight-up parody like WWE the Sitcom, this will be pretty much as realistic as possible, with the hook being it's a modern Russo-written WWE. Well, there'll be some stuff that stretches the imagination, BUT THIS IS FANTASY DAMMIT

I'm only going to be writing Raw & PPVs. In this UNIVERSE, Smackdown, NXT etc still exist, but we'll just work with the pretext that nothing that happens on those shows means anything, so you don't need to read them. Hell, just for interests sake, we'll say HHH is 100% in charge of NXT and runs it as a territory to feed into WWE, but Raw is strictly RUSSO, BABY.

Here's THE ROSTER:

Released: Drew McIntyre, Epico, Ezekiel Jackson, Jinder Mahal, JTG, Primo, Ted diBiase, Yoshi Tatsu, Aksana, Tamina Snuka
Promoted from NXT: Kassius Ohno, Paige

Alberto Del Rio, Alex Riley, Antonio Cesaro, Big E Langston, The Big Show, Bo Dallas, Brad Maddox, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Chris Jericho, Christian, CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Curt Hawkins, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Darren Young, David Otunga, Dean Ambrose, Derrick Bateman, Dolph Ziggler, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Evan Bourne, Fandango, The Great Khali, Heath Slater, Hornswoggle, Jack Swagger, Jey Uso, Jimmy Uso, Jinder Mahal, John Cena, Justin Gabriel, Kane, Kassius Ohno, Kofi Kingston, Mark Henry, Mason Ryan, Michael McGillicutty, The Miz, R-Truth, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio, Ricardo Rodriguez, Rob Van Dam, Roman Reigns, Ryback, Santino Marella, Seth Rollins, Sheamus, Sin Cara, Tensai, Titus O'Neil, Triple H, Tyson Kidd, The Undertaker, Wade Barrett, William Regal, Zack Ryder

AJ Lee, Alicia Fox, Brie Bella, Cameron, Kaitlyn, Layla, Naomi, Natalya, Paige, Nikki Bella, Rosa Mendes

Commentary: Michael Cole & JBL

General Manager: to be announced THIS MONDAY ON RAW


WELCOME BACK, CHOSEN ONE
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Old 05-02-2013, 07:00 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: World Russo Entertainment


May 6th 2013- Russo's World


Vince McMahon heads to the ring for the HUGE ANNOUNCEMENT. Vince admits that at times things have been stale over the years, but he always knows when it’s time to SHAKE THINGS UP. The Chairman of the Board confirms that Vickie Guerrero and Brad Maddox have had their contracts TERMINATED! Now we can usher in some CRAZINESS, as it’s time to get right down to business and unveil the new General Manager of Monday Night Raw… VINCE. RUSSOOOOOOOOO!!
Russo comes out to a subdued reaction, although his natural arrogance draws some heat. Russo introduces himself: “Ladies and gentlemen, my name is VINCE. RUSSO. Some have called me the antichrist of professional wrestling, YEAH I SAID PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING, others have called me the greatest mind in the history of the business (fans heckle this claim, but Russo ignores them). Russo says he has sat in his penthouse in NEW YAWK CITY, and watched the WWE crumble like Stalin’s empire. Well, ladies and gentlemen, THE MESSIAH HAS COME TO FIX EVERYTHING. Vinnie Ru promises to make 2013, 2014 and 2015 the most must-see years in the history of Monday Night Raw, before saying he has something he needs to get off his “well-chiseled” chest: “JIM CORNETTE, you no-good redneck son of a bitch, I hope you’re watching out there on your couch in the DEEP SOUTH, and I hope the tears running down your cheeks right now are enough to keep you hydrated, because I am BLACKBALLING you from the entire industry you no-good hick, YOU CAN KISS MY ASS”. Vinnie Ru then throws down the mic and leaves the ring, the new General Manager ushering in the new era of Monday Night Raw!



The first match of the night sees:

--KOFI KINGSTON VS JACK SWAGGER (with Zeb Colter)--
UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH



Before the match, Zeb grabs the mic and tells Kofi Kingston that he is not a REAL AMERICAN, he had to SNEAK over the border when he came from “Nigeria, or Cameroon or wherever the hell you came from”, and as such it is a DISGRACE that he holds the “championship of our once great country”. Kofi starts off like a house-on-fire, hitting big moves, such a cross-body from the top rope, popping the crowd and running around at 100mph. The balance of the match shifts when Zeb Coulter distracts the referee on the apron, and Swagger uses brass knucks from his singlet to knock out the Champion. Referee Mike Chioda turns round as Swagger makes the cover, 1-2-3, we have a new United States Champion!
Swagger and Zeb celebrate by beating down Kofi after the match, Zeb now waving a Confederate flag, which he uses to jab in the gut, before cracking him over the back with the flagpole. Swagger and Zeb stand over the falling Kofi, proclaiming “WE THE PEOPLE!” as Swaggers’ new theme music, “Redneckified” by Neal McCoy. Big heat.


WINNER: Jack Swagger, becoming NEW UNITED STATES CHAMPION




We cut to WWE Champion John Cena standing backstage with promoted interview-conductor Renee Young. The CHAMP says he is just as shocked as anybody at the arrival of Vince Russo, but he’ll back the new management 100%, because you can either fight change or you can embrace change. The new General Manager interrupts. Vince Russo, with a wry smile on his face: “JAWN CENA. The whole world has waited years to see us 2 icons face-to-face (again nobody in the crowd responds to this). Well Superman, I got some news for ya, YOUR EASY RIDE IS OVER, BUDDY BOY. I’m gonna make your life a living hell, Jawn Cena. In Vince Russo’s WWE, we don’t have room for any Superman, there’s no black and white, JUST SHADES OF GRAY, BABY. Tonight, Jawn Cena, you defend that title against RYBACK in a Falls Count Anywhere Match! And the Special Guest Referee? Well, you’ll just have to wait to find out like everybody else!”. Russo walks off laughing maniacally as Cena looks concerned.



--THE PRIME TIME PLAYERS VS TONNES OF FUNK--



Tag Team action time on Raw. Tonnes of Funk perform their usual dance routine on the way to the ring, smiling and jiving all the way. The match kicks off with all 4 men in the ring smack-talking, but just as the bell rings, TENSAI TURNS ON BRODUS! The big man levels his partner with a clothesline, before delivering a big boot to the face of the Funkasaurus. The Prime Time Players watch on laughing, before doing their millions of dollars dance all the way up the aisle. In the ring, Tensai takes a steel chair to the back of Brodus, with commentators Cole and JBL questioning why Tensai would do such a thing. JBL suggests Brodus may have told him to “funk off” earlier in the day.

WINNER: NO CONTEST



Antonio Cesaro is working out in a private area backstage when KASSIUS OHNO comes into frame. Ohno is holding a Ring of Honor “Best of Kings of Wrestling” DVD in his hand, and introduces himself, with Cesaro saying he knows exactly who he is. Kassius says he’s been watching Cesaro for the last few months, and his stock has collapsed. Kassius suggests they reunite the KOW. The Swiss Superstars mulls this over in his mind before walking off, saying he needs to practice his yodeling. Ohno looks disappointed.




Sheamus comes out to the ring, with a big smile on his face. The Celtic Warrior says he has some “very special guests for us: TIMMY, COREY AND MIKEY, 3 Make-a-Wish kids whose dreams are coming true as they get to enter the ring on Monday Night Raw! Sheamus does some lame Bart Simpson-ish gags with the kids, before MARK HENRY’S music hits. The World’s Strongest man walks to the ring whilst on the mic, saying it’s great that these kids get to have their dreams come true, but he has a dream of his own: a Monday Night Raw without Sheamus. Henry enters the ring and the 2 men square off, brawling to the outside, and all the way through the curtain. The Make-a-Wish kids look scared, but Michael Cole praises the high heavens that they managed to get out of this scary situation unscathed. Just then…FEED-ME-MORE! RYBACK’S music hits, and Ryback makes his way out to the ring. BIG HUNGRY paces back and forth, looking incredibly pissed off. The number one contender asks Timmy, Corey and Mikey who their favourite Superstar is, and all 3 respond “John Cena” defiantly, knowing THE RYBACK cannot harm them. Big Hungry then asks all 3 who they think will win the WWE Championship match tonight. Timmy says Cena, Corey says Cena, but before Mikey can respond with his answer…RYBACK HITS HIM WITH A DEVASTATING SPEAR. MIKEY HAS BEEN BROKEN IN HALF, surely suffering numerous broken ribs. Timmy and Corey try to escape the ring, but Ryback grabs the pair by their hair, lifts both of them onto their shoulders, and hits SHELLSHOCK, shaking the ring! Ryback instigates FEED ME MORE chants, standing over his three felled victims, who have a combined age of 21. The crowd is in complete shock.






We cut to Santino, with his jaw dropped, watching on a monitor backstage. The Cobra (Santino’s right arm) pops up, and asks “can you believe what we just saw?!”. Santino says it was the craziest thing he ever did see, when out of nowhere, his LEFT ARM pops up, dressed as a PYTHON. His two arms begin arguing with each other, when VINCE RUSSO enters frame. “No, no, no, not on MY Monday Night Raw. You either get rid of the cobra BS, or your ass is out of here, ANTHONY”. Russo walks off laughing manically as Santino drops his head in sadness.




Footage is shown from a recent Fozzy performance in Seattle. Fozzy were rocking the stage, with the rowdy 2,500 fans seemingly having a great time. However, the music stopped suddenly, and Jericho looked all around himself quizzically when…DA DA. DA DA DA DA. DADADADA. Fandango and his valet Summer Rae waltzed their way onto the stage! Jericho asked Fandango what the hell he thinks he’s doing, “this isn’t WWE Johnny, we’re not working tonight”. But Fandango attacks Y2J, and hits his finisher “The Perfect Ten”, right there on the stage, knocking Jericho unconscious! Fandango then gives a DDT to Rich Ward, through the drum set, and the rest of Fozzy sprint off stage in terror. Fandango then demands that the crowd “sing my song”, and they follow the man’s orders, with ChaLaLa echoing through the venue, Fandango and Summer Rae soaking it all in.



--TEAM HELL NO VS 2MB--
NON-TITLE MATCH

Daniel Bryan got POP OF THE NIGHT, as per usual, with his YES chants. The Champions made quick work of their jobber opponents, dominating the entire match. The finish came quickly, with Kane hitting a Chokeslam on Heath Slater, before Bryan hit the FLYING GOAT to get the three count. After the match, THE SHIELD came through the crowd! Bryan and Kane tried to fight them off, but that PACK OF WOLVES mentality was too strong, and The Shield beat the Champions down. Rollins & Ambrose put Bryan through the announce table, before pulling a table out from under the ring. They set the table up outside the ring, and Roman Reigns & Seth Rollins were about to put Kane through the table, when Dean Ambrose stopped them pointing to his head. Ambrose then went under the ring…and pulled out GASOLINE AND MATCHES! To the SHOCK of the crowd, Ambrose set the table ON FIRE, and Reigns & Rollins slammed Kane through the FLAMING TABLE!!! Kane rolled around in agony, TAKING OFF HIS MASK to try and attend to his seemingly injured face. The medics came out to look on Kane as The Shield made their exit through the crowd.



WINNERS: Team Hell No



We go into 's office. A massive photo frame on the wall features Russo in a Christ-like pose, as well as posters of numerous 80s sitcoms plastered around the walls. Russo is sat in a massive leather chair behind a marble desk. World Heavyweight Champion Dolph Ziggler walks in with AJ Lee and Big E Langston. Ziggler welcomes Russo back to WWE, and says when he was in college Vince Russo was his hero, blatantly sucking up to the news boss. Russo tells Ziggler he’s booked Dolph & Big E vs Randy Orton & Alberto Del Rio, and it’s UP NEXT. Before they leave, Vinnie Ru asks AJ to stay behind. She seems reluctant, but Dolph nods his head, they kiss, and Dolph & Big E leave. Russo tells AJ that there are certain things she could do if she wants to really get ahead in this business, certain “favours”…when AJ interrupts him. She says that Dolph is her man, and she is loyal to the end. Russo becomes incredulous upon hearing this, foams at the mouth with anger and screams at AJ: “WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU AWR? YOU’RE AS BIG A SLUT AS TAMMY LYNN SYTCH, GET THE HELL OUTTA MY OFFICE!”. AJ slaps Russo before leaving, which leaves the new boss with a sadistic grin on his face.



--DOLPH ZIGGLER & BIG E LANGSTON (with AJ Lee) VS RANDY ORTON & ALBERTO DEL RIO--

After everybody has made their entrance and the match is about to begin, IRONMAN hits, and Vinnie Ru stands atop the aisle. Russo says NOBODY defies an order from him, and tells Orton & Del Rio to “get the hell out of my ring”. The BOSS says that Dolph Ziggler & Big E will pay for the sins of AJ Lee, and introduces their new opponent: OSCAR THE WRESTLING BEAR. Out stumbles Oscar, a 400lb Alaskan Grizzly Bear. Dolph and Big E look concerned, but Big E assures Dolph that he’s “got this one”. Oscar sizes up his 2 prey in the ring as the crowd anticipates certain death for Dolph & Langston. However, Langston runs at the bear, knocking him off his feet, before hitting the BIG ENDING. Oscar’s trainer runs out to the ring in tears, the match declared a non-contest. The bear trainer cuts an impassioned speech on why animal cruelty is so deplorable, and why majestic creatures like Oscar should be allowed to roam in the wild, not be forced to perform for our entertainment. Many crowd members have tears in their eyes at this emotional speech…WHEN BIG E CHARGES AT THE TRAINER AND TAKES HIM DOWN. BIG ENDING FOR THE TRAINER. Dolph & Big E stand over Oscar & his trainer, triumphant, as Russo is shown watching backstage, nodding his head at the monitor, saying: “now THAT’S what I’m talking about. THAT is the reaction I wanted. You guys just passed the inauguration”.



The cameras catch up with Kane in the lockeroom, speaking with a medic. The medic informs Kane that the burns he sustained earlier in the night are so bad that he will have to wear a mask over his face for the rest of his life. Kane turns to the camera and shrugs. Daniel Bryan comes in shouting “NO! NO! NO! The Shield cannot get away with this! I’ve spoken to Vince Russo, Kane, and we have The Shield at Extreme Rules…in an INFERNO MATCH!”. Kane asks Bryan what the hell he’s thinking, and the Tag Team Champions argue as the segment fades out.




Triple H makes his way out to the ring. The Game says at Extreme Rules, he’ll be locked inside a steel cage with a monster- but he feels confident. He feels confident because WWE IS BETTER THAN UFC. The Game BURIES the UFC, before TITO ORTIZ MAKES HIS WAY OUT TO THE RING. Tito says it angers him to see HHH trying to bury the UFC like he’s some sort of tough guy, but when Brock gets him in a cage at Extreme Rules, Triple H will learn what it means to TAP OUT. HHH just sits back and allows Tito Ortiz to continue his rant, and when Ortiz stops, HHH asks, “you finished?”. Tito says he is, and The Game says “good”…BEFORE LAYING OUT TITO ORTIZ WITH A PEDIGREE! The Game then gives Tito Ortiz the CROTCH CHOP, before walking off laughing, satisfied with a thorough BURYING of Tito Ortiz.



MAIN EVENT TIME
--JOHN CENA VS RYBACK--
FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE MATCH FOR THE WWE CHAMPIONSHIP



As the match is about to begin, VINCE RUSSO makes his 27th appearance of the night, coming out to the top of the aisle to announce the Special Guest Referee: …VINCE. RUSSO! The crowd groans horrendously at this announcement, as Russo has booked himself over almost every segment of the show The match begins with Cena constantly about to gain the upper hand, but Vince Russo preventing him from attacking Ryback by breaking up the action, and checking on Big Hungry as if he is injured. This constantly allows Ryback to get cheap shots in on Super Cena, and eventually the challenger is dominating the match. Vinnie Ru tries to count out Cena with a fast count after Ryback hits a big spinebuster, but the CHAMP manages to kick out at 2! Cena eventually fights back, and clotheslines Ryback over the top rope, the brawl spilling high into the crowd. Ryback appears to be getting the upper hand, but all of a sudden a MASKED CROWD MEMBER hands John Cena a tennis racket! Cena uses the racket to beat the shit out of Ryback, all the way back into the middle of the ring. THE CHAMP hits the AA, but at the 2 count, Vinnie Ru feigns a shoulder injury, and acts incapable of completing the three count. CENA has had enough at this point, and lifts Russo up in the AA, but RYBACK takes Cena down with a BIG BOOT! The half-conscious Russo orders the timekeeper to ring the bell at this point, and thus, in classic Vince Russo fashion, we end the show with a NO CONTEST!!! However, Ryback continues his attack on CENA, and the shows goes off the air with Ryback hitting SHELLSHOCK on CENA, as Vince Russo stands over the fallen CHAMP holding the WWE Championship above his head. For some reason.

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Old 05-03-2013, 10:34 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: World Russo Entertainment

NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Wrestling Observer
Raw received a record 6,487 complaints from the Broadcasting Commission over the content aired on Monday night.

The Make-a-Wish children were not actually young kids, but rather midgets who Vince Russo paid $650,000 in plastic surgery fees to make them appear much younger.

Raw peaked at a 3.5, but dipped at a shocking 1.4. Final rating came in at a 2.6. Vince Russo came to the immediate defence of the rating, stating that the ratings much be "purged", and has said things will get much, much worse before they get better.

Backstage, the entire roster were furious from the start to finish of the show, with many questioning the quality of the show, content of the show, and Russo's decision to book himself all over the show. Russo responded to the claims by saying "people want REALITY, and since I'm Head Writer, I should be all over the show". As plans stand, Russo will be a prominent fixture over Raw for the coming months.

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Old 05-03-2013, 11:23 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: World Russo Entertainment



I really enjoyed it and the fact that WWE has some Hollywood writers and someone creative as you posts only on a forum is the best example why pro wrestling (especially WWE) is so lame and in such a shitty state. The segment with Ryback and 3 little kids is already my favourite segment, especially after the real Raw episode with WWE exploiting the kids
I'm really looking forward to this, keep up the good work
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Old 05-03-2013, 12:03 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Great work man... Hats off to you... its freaking awesome.

Next Time I meet you, you are .
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Old 05-03-2013, 05:22 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: World Russo Entertainment

Fucking hysterical. Repped.
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