Re: Extreme Championship Wrestling 2001 - Tales of a Jaded Old Man
Thanks for all the feedback, gentlemen. It is much appreciated.
Extreme TV: The USA Network has been taken to the extreme, and the hardcore revolution continues at 10PM EST tonight! Two former ECW World Champions will meet in the main event as Justin Credible challenges Sandman, in a match with potential ramifications on the ECW World Title scene! ECW's House of Hardcore graduates and reigning ECW Tag Team Champions 'Dastardly' Danny Doring and 'Amish' Roadkill defend their titles against a young team who, like Doring and Roadkill did several years ago, are trying to come through the ranks in Christian York and Joey Matthews. High-profile stars like 'The Whole F'n Show' Rob Van Dam, ECW World Champion 'The Man Beast' Rhino, and 'The New F'n Show' Jerry Lynn will all be at the home of ECW, the Viking Hall, for Extreme TV, and Balls Mahoney will also do battle against Hot Commodity's Chris Hamrick!
ECW Extreme TV
For the first time in Extreme TVís long, renowned history, the show opens with your standard opening - ďThis is ExtremeĒ blasting in time with the opening video package. No Joey Styles to open up the show, no Paul Heyman shooting on whoever he feels like being mad at this week. Nope, none of that. Instead, it is time to get right to the revolution everyoneís talking about - E..C..W!
As Extreme TV goes ďliveĒ from the Viking Hall in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, Joey Styles is all alone in the Nest - wherever that may be - tonight to call all the action. Styles does his best Don West impersonation (who? This is 2001!) to hype up tonightís main event between two former ECW World Champions - Justin Credible and, the man who single handedly took out Rhino, Jerry Lynn, and CW Anderson last week, Sandman! Styles does have to inform the fans however that both CW Anderson and Tommy Dreamer will not be in attendance tonight - Anderson is in Japan fulfilling other commitments, while Tommy Dreamer is recovering from a back injury that will only see him out for this week. Sounds to me like the booker just had nothing planned for them :shifty:
Setting It Up [81%]
As the commentary work from Styles continues, the Philadelphia fans start to scream in delight as ďWalkĒ fills the Viking Hall, bringing out everyoneís favorite, Mr. Extreme, The Whole Fín Show, Rob Van Dam! RVD isnít dressed for action tonight, but heís already holding a microphone as he walks down to the ring by himself - no Fonz tonight either - and looking serious as ever. RVD gets into the ring, and while he of course does all of his usual posing and taunting for the crowd, he gets down to business soon enough and addresses, well, everyone watching.
Rob Van Dam: Yaí know, ever since ECW first came onto the air on USA two weeks ago, Iíve sat back, and I chilled. When it was my turn to come out to this ring and compete, I came out, kicked some ass, and that was it. And when Jerry Lynn and Cyrus came out to this ring, and had a 24/7 pissing and moaning contest, Iíve ignored all of the crap spewing out of their mouths... until now.
RVD paces around the ring, deciding what he wants to say. All the pot must have gone to his head, as he needs a few moments.
Rob Van Dam: I know that all of you guys out here donít buy into the crap that Jerry Lynn and Cyrus have been sayiní about RVD, but itís time to set the record straight. The big knock on me, apparently, is that RVD thinks Rob Van Dam is too big for this company. Well in case there is anyone out there a little visually impaired - and if you are, I have some...heh... medicinal drugs back there that can help you out - let me just inform you of something... Iím right here!
That draws a pop from the crowd.
Rob Van Dam: If I wanted to, trust me, I wouldnít be here in ECW right now. Two months ago, when nobody really knew what was going on with the future of this company, I got a phone call from Vince McMahon, and I got an offer to go to Connecticut and join the World Wrestling Federation. But where am I, right now? Did I sell out for more money, or am I still standing in an ECW ring, ready and waiting to entertain each and every one of you whenever I see fit?
ďECW! ECW! ECW! ECW! ECW! ECW!Ē
Rob Van Dam: Thatís exactly what I thought! Iím *thumbs* Rob..Van..Dam, and I am *thumbs* E..C..W!
Rob Van Dam: Jerry Lynn, Cyrus, the two of you donít give two craps about ECW! You would love for Rob Van Dam to be some egomaniacal snob and walk away for more money. Tough luck, kid, it ainít happening! The real problem is that Jerry Lynn, you are jealous of *thumbs* Rob..Van..Dam!
The crowdís a big fan of that.
Rob Van Dam: Let Mr. Van Dam teach you all a history lesson: seven times, seven times, Jerry Lynn and Rob Van Dam have wrestled each other in this ring with there being a winner. Do you know how many times Jerry Lynn has walked away a loser? Six, count Ďem, six times! Just once...only one time... has Jerry Lynn been able to defeat me, *thumbs* R..V..D, and when he did, he needed help to do it! It looks to me like when you match up Rob Van Dam with Jerry Lynn... Jerry Lynn canít hold the jock of *thumbs* R..V..D!
More cheers from the crowd. However, RVD's promo time is cut off by ďScapegoat" by Fear Factory, bringing out ĎThe New F'n Show' Jerry Lynn. Lynn, much like RVD, comes out from the back without anyone by his side. Sporting athletic shorts and an ECW tee, Lynn marches down the aisle and into the ring, a microphone in hand, and looking pissed as all hell.
Jerry Lynn: Iím man enough to admit, Rob, without all of your ďhistory lessonsĒ, that you have been better than me!
Cheers from the ECW crowd.
Jerry Lynn: For over two years, I have played second fiddle to you, and I am sick and tired of it! Every match that we have had, I was always on par with you until that final stretch... the bottom of the ninth inning... when somehow, some way, you legged out a victory over me. BUT NOT ANYMORE! NOT ANYMORE!
The intensity from Lynn actually seems to startle Van Dam a little bit, and he takes a small step backwards.
Jerry Lynn: In case you didnít notice what was going on in ECW while you were holding out for more money like the greedy son of a bitch that I know you truly are, Iíve upped my game. Iíve taken my talents to a whole new level, and now, I am more than capable of finishing out of the job! When it comes to crunch time, itís my time! MY TIME! No longer will Jerry Lynn be that guy, the guy who wrestled a five star match... and lost. I am still the New Fín Show - the guy who can put on a five star match... and win.
Lynn finishes with a hoarse whisper, trying to add emphasis to what heís saying. Lynn is putting himself all out there tonight for everyone to see. Rob Van Dam, however, has regained his cool, and simply smirks at Lynn.
Rob Van Dam: Look man, I have a lot of respect for you. Every time we met in this very ring, we put on some of the best wrestling the world has to offer. You took me to my limit every single time. Youíre good, Jerry... but youíre no *thumbs* Rob..Van..Dam!
The crowd chants along with it, and Lynn quickly becomes furious again.
Jerry Lynn: THATíS IT! I have had it with this, Rob! Iím not going to stand back and let you just humiliate me in front of millions of people! Iím not your bitch, Van Dam! Iím JERRY LYNN! IíM THE NEW *FUCKINí* SHOW! AND I AM BETTER THAN YOU!
Van Dam simply smirks at Lynn, which just makes Lynn more made.
Jerry Lynn: I am done with this! You want to make a mockrey of me!? Fine! Next week, I want you! Rob Van Dam! Jerry Lynn! One-on-one!
RVD is already nodding his head in agreement - challenge accepted!
Jerry Lynn: Next week, itíll be RVD versus Jerry Lynn, one more time, and Iím going to show you just how damn good I have become! Next week, it doesnít need to be about any titles, any awards, or anything or anyone but you, and me. The two of us - one-on-one - inside of a steel cage!
RVD continues to nod his head in agreement.
Rob Van Dam: Mr. Extreme and Jerry Lynn, inside of a steel cage, next week? You know Iím all about it! And Lynn, I hate to have to tell yaí this - well, actually, I donít - but when you step into the ring with me next week, the only thing thatís going to happen... is a lucky number seventh win for *thumbs* Rob..Van..Dam!
The two long rivals stare each other down afterwards, neither man daring to make a move as the buzzing crowd cheers the match made for next week. Joey Styles does his best hype job of the match as the show has to take its first commercial break of the evening after that lengthy opening segment.
When Extreme TV returns, we return to already-in-progress wrestling action!
Balls Mahoney vs. Chris Hamrick (w/Hot Commodity) [56%]
With that first segment a lengthy one, the show has to cut out some other action, so weíre already in this match as Chris Hamrick has Mahoney in the corner, kicking away at his mid-section. Weíre informed by Styles that during the break, Mahoney started off well in the early goings, but Julio Dinero entered the ring and Hot Commodity double teamed Mahoney to give Hamrick the advantage. Hamrick tries to wear down Mahoney with a lot of strikes, but he has to use his speed to stay on the offensive, and that he does, scoring a near fall with a jumping and swinging DDT, and then a tilt-a-whirl head scissors take down. However, Hamrick goes for a Confederate Crunch Leg Drop from the top turnbuckle moments later, and his tailbone and leg finds nothing but the canvas as Mahoney rolls out of the way. From there, Balls makes easy work of Hot Commodity. He grabs a chair from the outside of the ring, gets into the ring, and fries Hamrickís brains with the steel chair! Julio Dinero hops on the apron and tries to help his partner, but he is sent flying when Mahoney throws the the chair at him, smacking him across the face! From there, Mahoney scoops Hamrick off his feet and spikes him back down with the Nutcracker Suite (Michinoku Driver II)! Itís an academic cover from there, and an easy victory for Mahoney as he gets his introduction to the USA Network.
Balls Mahoney def. Chris Hamrick
As ďBig BallsĒ by AC/DC hits and Mahoney starts to celebrate in the ring, thereís a lot of noise from a section of the crowd to the left on the entrance aisle. Some one, presumably a fan, is trying to hop the rail. Wait, itís no fan! Thatís Mike Awesome! Heís back again! The former ECW World Champion and traitor hops the guard rail, but right away he is tackled again by ECW security! Four big, burly security members are there right away, and Awesome is brought down to the concrete floor! More security members arrive on the scene from the back, as well as three police officers. Again, Awesome is laughing the whole time as security restrains him, not once trying to fight them. Security members stand in front of the crowd while this scene goes on, the crew needed there because several members from the crowd are trying to jump the rail to get at Awesome, a man they absolutely hate. Itís a near riot scene in the ECW Arena, but thankfully the police men now assigned to ECW TV tapings (thank you USA Network!) handcuff Awesome within a minute, and march him up the entrance aisle and through the back. As he is pushed up the back, the camera catches one line that Awesome says...
Mike Awesome: ...Itís all part of the plan...
Still laughing, the big hoss is taken away from the ringside area as the show cuts to the back for a much needed promo after this chaos.
Too Sweet Just-In-Credible [76%]
In a dimly lit
garage hallway of Viking Hall, stands a man with only jean shorts on, because thatís how wrestlers should dress. Itís a man who will be in the main event tonight, a former ECW World Champion, Justin Credible.
Justin Credible: Last week on Extreme TV, I watched from the back while Sandman went into the ring and made an impact, taking out Rhino with a Singapore Cane. Now Sandman, I know that you got every right to feel like the numbaí one contender to the ECW World Title. I get it. You lost to Rhino, and you ainít got your re-match yet. But sorry, boozey, that just ainít gonna fly for me. You see, what you did last week... that shouldíve been me doiní it! Iím the Impact Player! I make an impact! And the Singapore Cane... Iím the master of it! Not you!
Credible picks up a Singapore Cane and twirls it around a few times. Not impressing anyone, buddy.
Justin Credible: Tonight, Sandman, itís you and me in that ring. And I got news for yaí, chump - Iím gonna kick your ass! Iím going to show everyone that the only man who should be getting a shot at the ECW World Championship is me! Your time has come and gone, Sandman! And me, right now, this is the dawn of the era of Justin Credible! And lets face facts - me becoming the new ECW World Champion once again... thatís not the coolest, thatís not just the best... thatís Just-In-Credible!
Credible gives the camera a powerful stare before the show cuts to a commercial break.
Danny Doring & Roadkill (c) vs. Christian York & Joey Matthews
ECW Tag Team Championship [74%]
Yet again when Extreme TV returns, we're already viewing some 'extreme' action as Danny Doring has Joey Matthews in a dreaded side head lock... OF DOOM~! The focus isn't really in the ring at first though, as Joey Styles has a guest in the Nest - the Full Blooded Italians! 'Little' Guido Maritato is calling the action with Styles, while Tony Mamaluke and, of course, Sal E. Graziano eat a pie of pizza. Little Guido runs down the Tag Team Champions and the challengers throughout the match, pointing out the fact that the FBI should be getting the chance to become Tag Champs, not some green nobodies, fuhgetaboutit!In the ring the action quickly goes to a higher tempo as Doring shoves Matthews into the ropes, but the youngster comes firing back with a tilt-a-whirl head scissors... into a swinging DDT! The young challengers score some early offense as York and Matthews combine several times, showing their great chemistry. Danny Doring is sent over the top rope with a double clothesline, while a few moments later, the young guns knock down the giant Roadkill with stereo springboard missile dropkicks from the third rope! This sends Roadkill to the outside as well, and York and Matthews simultaneously run off the ropes before diving over the top rope to the outside, taking down both of the champions with no-handed planchas!
Despite the high-flying adventures of York and Matthews, their inexperience comes back to bite them. The duo continue their high flying ways, and it tires themselves out within a few minutes. Christian York takes too long to get up to the top turnbuckle when he looks to fly again, and it allows Roadkill to get up to his feet and catch York when he comes off the top with a cross body. The Angry Amish Warrior is able to transition York to his shoulder, and squash him with a running power slam! After tags are made, Dastardly Danny cleans house on Joey Matthews, dropping him with several clotheslines before landing a Bareback (shoulder jawbreaker). Christian York tries his best to help out his partner, but quickly falls to the Wham Bam, Thank You Ma'am (lifting double underhook DDT)! Roadkill comes into the ring then and puts Matthews in a wheel barrow hold while Doring ascends to the top turnbuckle... Danaconda Drop... the BUGGY BANG! Doring makes the cover, and it's an easy count for Jim Molineux - ONE! TWO! THREE! The Champions retain again.
Danny Doring pins Joey Matthew; Danny Doring & Roadkill retain the ECW Tag Team Championship
As the products of the ECW House of Hardcore celebrate their victory, Guido sulks on commentary, still upset that he and Mamaluke didn't get a chance for gold tonight. As Doring and Roadkill continue their celebrations, however, Guido promises to Joey Styles that the FBI will be getting their hands on the ECW Tag Team Titles very soon. With that said, it's time for another pre-taped promo!
Rhino, Angry! You, Death! [69%]
Standing in a dark hallway is the reigning ECW World Champion, and a very angry Man Bast, Rhino. The Rhino is already pulling at his hair and his body shaking slightly from rage.
Rhino: I'm not in the mood for anyone's *shit* tonight! Ever since last week, when Extreme TV ended the way it did, I've been a little... unhinged. I've been a little crazy. I've been, a little, ANGRY!
Rhino yells into the camera, spit flying onto the lens. Tasty.
Rhino: It seems like lately, everybody wants to come at the Rhino. SO COME ON! COME ON AND DO IT! Mike Awesome had a go! So why not the Sandman too!? Singapore Cane! Right, Sandman!? That's what you used to beat me frickin' senseless last week! BAM! BAM! BAM! SINGAPORE CANE! RIGHT TO MY SKULL! ...Do you remember that? BECAUSE I DO!
Again, the intensity of Rhino's yelling sends spit flying everywhere. He takes a few deep breaths, calming himself down ever so slightly, before continuing.
Rhino: Sandman, next time you think about coming at me, I want you to remember just one thing. It took me only one minute to pin your ass and win the ECW World Title. One minute! If you want to come back for more, Sandman, IT WON'T BE A MINUTE! You're not gonna be so lucky next time, Sandman! I'm gonna spend HOURS! Hours torturing you Sandman! I'm gonna make you SUFFER! I'm gonna make you BLEED! Come at me again, Sandman, and I'll make you WISH, that you WERE DEAD! DEAD BY THE TIME THE RHINO'S DONE WITH YA'!
Rhino snarls and growls into the camera, a look in his eye that shows a man, or perhaps an animal, snapping and losing his mind, as Extreme TV heads to its final commercial break.
As the ECW show returns, it is to "Snap Your Fingers, Snap Your Neck" playing throughout Viking Hall, and Justin Credible making his entrance into the ring. The fans give Credible his usual negative reception, booing him and trying to taunt him with insults and chants. Credible just smirks as he stands on the first and second ropes, lifting his Singapore Cane into the air and sticking his tongue out while he poses. However, Credible is cut off as Motorhead's rendition of "Enter Sandman" hits, and the Viking Hall goes crazy one more time for the coolest entrance in professional wrestling today, Sandman! It takes almost a minute for Sandman to be picked up by the camera, but there he is, chugging a beer and smoking a cigarette in the crowd. Sandman makes his way to the guard rail, stands on it, and tilts a beer down so it can go into a fan's mouth. That nerd is happy right now! Sandman then chugs one more beer before smashing the can over his forehead, spitting his beer out into the crowd one he's finished. As Sandman enters the ring and tries to play to the crowd more, however, he is jumped from behind by Credible!
Justin Credible vs. Sandman [69%]
Credible kicks Sandman in the back and uses forearm blows to beat on Sandman as the bell rings, but that's not what the fans want - they want the extreme stuff - so Credible uses his Singapore Cane across Sandman's back three times before braining him across the face! Sandman staggers before taking a Flair flop to the canvas. It remains Justin Credible in control in the early rounds of this contest, Credible mainly keeping Sandman in the corner and punching and kicking away at him. However, the 5-time ECW Champion reverses a whip and sends Credible into the corner turnbuckles before coming off the ropes and planting Credible face first to the canvas with a bulldog! From there, the action quickly goes hardcore as Sandman grabs Credible and throws him between the ropes and to the outside. Sandman then grabs a Singapore Cane, gets onto the apron, jumps off, and smashes the weapon across the skull of Justin Credible! "EC-Dub! EC-Dub!"
Now on the outside of the ring, Sandman continues to use the Singapore Cane, striking Credible across the rib cage with the cane once before Sandman picks Credible up off his feet and drives his throat down onto the steel guard rail with a flap jack! The action gets more extreme as the two men make their way into the crowd when Sandman flips Credible over the rail, and the beloved ECW Icon uses his trademark Southpaw punches to Credible's head to beat on the Impact Player. A fan gives Sandman a chair to use while in the crowd, and the Sandman, always a crowd pleaser, hits Credible over the head with it, knocking him back into a group of fans! The fans push Credible back into Sandman, and he drives the chair across Credible's forehead, busting him wide open! "ECW! ECW! ECW!" Sandman beats Credible back to the guard rail, but not before stopping to chug a beer that a fan gives him, before eventually flipping Credible back into the ringside area.
Looking to try and presumably finish Credible off, Sandman grabs a table from underneath the ring and sets it up right outside of the ring. Sandman grabs Credible and lifts him up onto the apron before climbing up as well, holding his Singapore Cane too. After three left handed strikes, Sandman wraps the Cane across Credible's throat... WHITE RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP... but Credible blocks it! Credible elbows away at Sandman's gut before lifting him up off his feet... BELLY-TO-BACK SUPLEX... THROUGH THE TABLE! "ECW! ECW! ECW!" And from Joey Styles - "OH MY GOODDD!" Both men go through the table, and are down for several moments before Credible starts to stir. The Impact Player rolls Sandman into the ring, and slowly gets into the ring himself, his forehead still bleeding down his face and onto his chest. Credible wants to end things right away, and lifts Sandman upside down - That's Incredible - but Sandman's body weight and momentum reverses it, and Sandman ends up holding Credible upside down before power slamming him to the canvas! Sandman pulls Credible up to his feet before grabbing the second Singapore Cane... WHITE RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Sandman covers - ONE! TWO!
"Yeah! I Penetrate the demons
Their teardrops burn away my eyes
I love the paper-thin cry of the locust
Is there and other way to die"
The pin fall is stopped as 'Extreme Referee' HC Loc stops counting as "El Phantasmo and The Chicken-Run Blast-O-Rama" plays all throughout the ECW Arena, and after several moments, with Joey Styles marking out the whole time, the man everyone knows is coming walks out through the curtain in jeans and an ECW t-shirt, Lance Storm! In the ring, Sandman is stunned at the arrival of the other Impact Player, and Storm walks down to the ring, the slightest smirk on his face, and enters the ring. The two men stare each other down before coming to blows! Even though Storm was never a big face with the crowd, the ECW fans love seeing Storm's return to ECW, and the two men exchange rights and lefts, but it is the Sandman who gets the upper hand, knocking Storm into the ropes. Storm is able to duck a Sandman clothesline attempt, and as Sandman turns around, it's right into a Double Super Kick! Storm and Credible combine again! The two men look at each other, smirk, and embrace! Lance Storm hops up onto the second turnbuckle as Credible lifts Sandman up off his feet... SPIKE THAT'S INCREDIBLE TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER! Justin Credible makes the cover - ONE! TWO! THREE! Justin Credible has defeated Sandman, and it seems like we have a re-union of the Impact Players! Lance Storm is back in ECW!
Justin Credible def. Sandman
As "Snap Your Fingers, Snap Your Neck" once again hits in the Viking Hall, the newly reunited Impact Players embrace again before grinning, and posing in the center of the ring in the trademark Impact Players stance. The crowd is split almost 50/50 in cheers and jeers, and that stays the same as... SUPER KICK TO JUSTIN CREDIBLE! Lance Storm decks his partner with a Super Kick! The Impact Players aren't re-united after all! The crowd is still split as to what exactly is going on, but the answer comes as Storm takes off his ECW t-shirt to reveal another black shirt, but this one with jagged red lettering that reads - N.I.T.R.O! That gets the crowd fully against Lance Storm, and as Joey Styles ends Extreme TV with final words, the focus is on Lance Storm, standing and smirking in the center of the ring as trash is thrown from the audience.
Joey Styles: OH MY GOD! I can't believe what is happening here tonight! Lance Storm... well, is he back in ECW? We all thought he was; it looked like the Impact Players had reformed here in ECW. But this... I just cannot fathom this. Those letters on Lance Storm's shirt - N.I.T.R.O - I think we all know what this means! I hate to say it, but Lance Storm and Mike Awesome are working for the same cause! Those two men both left ECW last year for that company down south with those three letters I am legally not allowed to say, and in case you didn't know, the flagship television show for that company... Nitro. Oh my God, ladies and gentlemen, Mike Awesome was right... there's an invasion coming...
When An Empire Falls - The Tale of World Championship Wrestling
Szumi's back, but not in black - back in BTB! And yeah, I know, he's doing WCW again - so unoriginal.
2008 - Best PPV - Starrcade
2008, 2007, & 2006 - Best Promo Writer
2007 & 2006 - Best Promo(s)
2007 - Most Creative
2007 - Best Feedbacker
2006 & 2007 BTB World Cup - Top Overall Scorer
2007 BTB World Cup - Booker of the Tournament
Only Person to Ever Score Perfect Score in a Tournament
BTB Hall of Famer
World Championship Wrestling 2001 - The Trio Ownership
This was The Trio Ownership; I did it a long time ago, for a long time. T'was a good ready, I think. People liked it and stuff.