Re: Melvisboy's WWE: The Comeback
Monday Night Raw
Amway Arena, Orlando, Florida
30th November 2009
The Raw entrance theme plays, and the camera cuts to the arena, where the red stage is covered in glorious fireworks, which fly about all over the place, before the camera sweeps across the roaring crowd, and then settles on the announce table. Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler are there to greet us. Both men are smiling like madmen.
Cole: Good evening, welcome to Monday Night Raw! We are live in the stunning city of Orlando, Florida, where the superstars of Raw have invaded the Amway Arena! I’m Michael Cole, with me as always is WWE Hall of Famer, Jerry ‘the King’ Lawler.
King: Thanks, Michael! Tonight’s show is gonna be a spectacular one, we have so much great action, my head is spinning!
Cole: Last week on Raw, we saw the emergence of the newest star on Raw, when the brash and arrogant All-American American Jack Swagger beat Randy Orton in the Main Event, albeit with Kofi Kingston’s help, and punched his ticket to Armageddon, where he will face WWE Champion John Cena for the biggest title in the business.
King: And tonight, Cole, not only will John, Jack, Randy and Kofi all be saying their pieces, they’ll all be in the Main Event, when WWE Champion John Cena and Kofi Kingston team up to take on the No. 1 Contender to the WWE Title, Jack Swagger and the Legend Killer, Randy Orton.
Cole: And what a Main Event that’s sure to be. Also tonight, Carlito’s Cabana returns, when Carlito will invite United States Champion the Miz down to the ring, and the pair will exchange words – Carlito cost the Miz his match with Evan Bourne last week, and declared that he wants the Miz’s United States Championship.
King: Yeah, and we know that the Miz has to defend his title at Armageddon – I bet Carlito would love nothing more than to be his opponent on December 27th.
Cole: And let’s not forget, that’s not all we have on tonight’s show. Also this evening, Chavo Guerrero fights to stay on Raw, and Jamie Noble takes on the man who nearly retired him two weeks ago, Sheamus. Also, the World Heavyweight Champion, the Big Show, is scheduled to be here to team with fellow Tag Team Champion Chris Jericho, to take on the Legacy for a place in Armageddon’s WWE Unified Tag Team Championship match.
King: Man, this show is gonna be so good... oh... can we start now?
Cole: I think we can, King...
Cole and King look towards the stage, as does the entire crowd, as music begins to blare out of the speakers, preceded by the usual words-
I HEAR VOICES IN MY HEAD, THEY COUNSEL ME, THEY UNDERSTAND... THEY TALK TO ME!
The crowd boos the hell out of Randy Orton as he stalks out on to the stage, his face a picture of seriousness. One of the older fans at ringside shouts something at him, and the Viper stops, shooting him a deadly glare, and the fan immediately subsides, shocked he’s merited a response. Orton goes back to walking down the ramp, and Justin Roberts makes a quick announcement.
Roberts: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome... Randy Orton!
The whole arena is on its feet as the fans hurl abuse at the Legend Killer. Orton doesn’t react at all to this greeting – either he’s used to the booing or he’s got other things on his mind. The Viper sweeps over the middle rope and into the ring, collecting a mic from ringside, which he toys with a little in his hands while he looks around the arena. His music subsides, and Orton lets the boos rain down for a moment before raising the mic to his mouth. The arena is lit with a scary maroon glow, as usual for Orton’s individual promos.
Orton: As usual, I get a hostile reaction from you people.
The fans agree with this by throwing more of it at him.
Orton: You people... you are blinded. Clearly I am a victim. Last week, I had my Armageddon WWE Title match stolen from me.
The crowd give him a giant mocking cheer. Orton ponders for a second on whether to play on it or not, then continues, deciding not to.
Orton: Kofi Kingston, being the imbecile he is, decided that it would be nothing short of ideal to get involved in my affairs... again. I would have thought his little victory over me at Survivor Series would have been good enough to satiate him... give him enough pleasure to leave me the hell alone. Obviously not.
Orton frowns and starts pacing.
Orton: Last week... he distracted me. I was about to put Jack Swagger away for good. I was about to win that match. I was about to punch my ticket to Armageddon, where I was going to resume the Age of Orton by beating John Cena!
The crowd boos the mention of the Age of Orton.
Orton: Kofi Kingston? Costing me that title shot is the final straw. Up until now, you’ve just been a fly – you just keep buzzing around my head. I bat you away, you just come back and try again. Now? I’m gonna go get the swatter.
Orton’s words are laden with hate, and the crowd, as well as everyone watching, can see that Orton is deadly serious.
Orton: Kofi, you’ve taken things one step too far. After last week’s... travesty, I went to see Shane McMahon.
The crowd don’t like where this is going.
Orton: At Armageddon, Kofi, you and I are finally going to face off one-on-one.
The crowd go wild for this. Orton lets them settle down, then continues.
Orton: But Kofi, I specifically asked for a match where I could teach you a very painful lesson in what happens when you get on the wrong side... of the Legend Killer.
Orton: Kofi Kingston. At Armageddon, we are going to face off... in a Steel Cage match!
The crowd roars this announcement, but hardly any time has passed since Orton’s line when-
SOS... I HEAR ‘DEM SHOUTIN’! SOS... I HEAR ‘DEM CRYIN’!
Orton’s lighting turns off as the arena turns green, as does the stage, and Kofi Kingston emphatically bursts out on to the stage, to an insane crowd reaction – he’s one hell of a lot more over since he started messing Orton around, it seems. Kingston hits three traditional ‘BOOM’s, to three lashings of fireworks, and Kingston jogs down the ramp, kicking his heels as he smiles at the fans. As he turns to the ring, and Orton, his face becomes as serious as the Viper’s. Kingston rolls in under the bottom rope, and immediately squares up to his enemy. One of the ringside staff chucks him a mic, which soars over the top rope, and Kingston catches with one hand – a daring move for a live show, but nevertheless he pulls it off. Kingston turns and looks to Orton as he music subsides, who is staring straight back at him with a cold tenacity. Kingston raises the mic.
Kingston pauses, then lets a ‘Kofi! Kofi! Kofi!’ chant build up. It dies back down, and Kofi continues, heartened by the support.
Kingston: Randy, you come out here, you try to intimidate me by telling everybody that you could beat me down – that you could break me.
The crowd boos.
Kingston: You’re way off, Randy. You talk about what you’re gonna do a damn lot, and yet I’ve shown you up every time we’re in the same ring together.
The crowd cheers a mighty one, but as Kofi goes to talk again, Orton cuts him off.
Orton: SHUT UP!
The crowd erupts with boos as Kingston frowns.
Orton: Just... shut... up. The sound of your voice just drives me up the wall. Look, you talentless wannabe... They call me Legend Killer for a reason. It’s because I... end... careers. It’s in my job description!
More boos are unloaded on Orton.
Orton: Ok... listen here. On December 27th, it really will be Armageddon for you, Kofi... I’m going to end your world... I’m going to end your career. I’m going to introduce a brand new, glorious chapter in the Age of Orton.
More immense boos for the Legend Killer. Kingston takes it in for a second, then paces a little around the ring before he goes to speak again – Orton attempts to cut him off, but Kingston holds up a hand.
Kingston: Yo, don’t give me that crap again. Now you listen to me. Come Armageddon, when they shut that cage door – you gonna see a side of me you’ve never seen before. I’m gonna unleash something you’ll never have expected. You won’t be fighting me. You’ll be fighting a whole new Kofi Kingston.
A giant cheer goes up for Kofi.
Kingston: What you’re gonna experience at Armageddon... it’s gonna be relentless. It’s gonna be brutal. It’s gonna be unstoppable.
Another big cheer for the Ghanaian.
Kingston: You can preach on and on about what you like to think you’re gonna do to me in that cage... but when it comes down to just the two of us in that structure... you’re in for a big surprise, Randy. You underestimate me, just like you underestimated Jack Swagger last week. At Armageddon? There’ll sure as hell be a new chapter in the Age of Orton... it’ll be the final one.
The crowd gets totally behind Kingston, and Orton fumes as he looks straight into Kingston’s eyes – he looks genuinely surprised that the Ghanaian doesn’t look more scared of him. After a short moment of silence as the pair stare each other down, he goes down a different route.
Orton: Kofi... have you ever been inside a steel cage?
The pair continue their staredown as Orton talks. Kingston’s eyes divert from Orton slightly.
Orton: Have you ever been smashed headfirst into one of those walls? Have you ever been thrown from the top of one as you climbed up it, desperate for freedom from this cruel, unforgiving structure?
Orton deliberately slows down his words, making every syllable a punch to Kingston’s heart.
Orton: Have you ever lain there, imprisoned, knowing your career is in danger? Have you ever experienced putting your health and career on the line in one match that means everything to you?
Orton is almost sneering at Kingston.
Orton: If the clear gap in ring skill wasn’t a good enough reason why I’m going to win at Armageddon, knowing what it’s like to experience it... is.
Orton takes in a breath, knowing he’s got underneath Kofi’s skin.
Orton: And tonight... as much as it sickens me to have to team up with such a pathetic wannabe like Jack Swagger... I am going to lay you out with an R... K... O...
Kingston doesn’t move an inch from his glare.
Orton: I’m going to give a very stark message – I’m going to give you a little taster of what I’m going to do to you when we step inside that cage two days after Christmas...
Orton’s voice has dropped to a deadly hiss.
Orton: Then again, you say I talk too much? Why don’t I stop telling you what I’m going to do... and just... plain... do it.
Orton drops the mic, and goes for an RKO... but Kofi pushes Orton away, leaving him to crash and burn! The crowd roars, and as Orton gets up – Kingston launches into a Trouble in Paradise... but Orton dodges the bullet, as Kofi had just done! The crowd is roaring for someone to connect, and Orton bounces off the ropes, but Kofi bends down, then launches Orton over the ropes with a Back Body Drop! The Legend Killer lands on the outside with a yell, and Kofi pants inside the ring, pleased he won this little battle. Orton, holding his back, begins to inch his way back up the ramp, yelling at Kingston with a red face. Kofi gives him the glare straight back, and Raw goes to the first break of the night.
Raw returns, and we meet Michael Cole and Jerry ‘the King’ Lawler at the announce table. As they talk, some replays of the promo from before play, minus the sound.
Cole: Welcome back to Monday Night Raw, where before the break we heard a huge announcement from the Legend Killer, Randy Orton.
King: I know, Michael! At Armageddon, we’re gonna have a monumental Steel Cage match between Kofi Kingston, and Randy Orton! What a match that’s gonna be!
Cole: A blockbuster match-up, for sure. Kofi Kingston came out and the pair exchanged words – the mind games have begun, as we head on the road to Armageddon.
King: And that’s not the last we’ve seen of Kofi Kingston and Randy Orton tonight!
Cole: You’re very right, King – tonight, Kofi Kingston will team up with WWE Champion John Cena to take on Randy Orton and Jack Swagger. But we still have a huge show ahead of us – starting now, as coming up next, we could be seeing Chavo Guerrero’s last match on Raw.
Chavo Guerrero’s music strikes up and the Mexican Warrior appears on the stage, looking seriously nervous. Very mild boos greet Chavo, who starts to wander down the ramp, his eyes looking at the red ropes, almost wondering if he’ll never go inside them again after this. The bell quickly chimes.
Roberts: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! If Chavo Guerrero loses, he must leave Raw!
Chavo stops on the ramp, his eyes wide as it sinks in. Slowly, he edges his way towards the squared circle, knowing he has to face up to it.
Roberts: Introducing first, from El Paso, Texas, weighing in 215 pounds... Chavo Guerrero!
More mild boos greet Chavo as he gets inside the ring via the ring steps, and he tests the ropes, making sure it’s of a suitable standard for him to fight his possible final battle in. His music subsides, and there is a moment of silence – Chavo clearly thinks Shane McMahon has given him a mammoth opponent. The commentators voice this to the viewers. After a bit more waiting, a fast-paced tune starts up... and out comes a masked Paul London! The crowd give him a mild cheer, though it’s clear they were hoping for somebody the size of a building or someone who had a better chance of getting Chavo off Raw. Still, the crowd seem pleased to see the return of the high-flying London, and as Roberts makes the announcement, London sprints down the ramp.
Roberts: And his opponent! From Austin, Texas, weighing in at 205 pounds... Paul London!
The commentators mention London is returning to WWE after just over a year away from the company, and London slides into the ring at top speed, before leaping onto a turnbuckle, putting both arms into the air, then launching off the top with a beautiful backflip! The crowd cheers for London’s acrobatics, and he heads for the opposite turnbuckle, clambers up, then launches backwards again with tremendous aerial ability, which provokes another little cheer. London slowly pulls his mask off his face, and the crowd see that it really is him, had the backflips not been conclusive evidence. He throws Chavo a hard look, and as he throws his mask and jacket to the ringside staff, the referee calls for the bell to start things off.
Chavo Guerrero vs Paul London
If Chavo loses, he must leave Raw
In a highly competitive match, both men have had the upper hand at one point or another – we join the action at about five minutes through, with Chavo holding London grounded with a headlock. London starts to make his way up, still in the headlock, and throws a couple of elbow shots to Chavo’s gut, but the Mexican Warrior won’t release the hold. London tries something different, and pushes them both towards the ropes, and as they come back, London breaks free of the headlock, bounces off the ropes, and ducks under a clothesline... he bounces off the other side, and Chavo tries for a Hip Toss, but London lands on his feet, and connects with a picture-perfect Superkick! Chavo goes down and London collapses on top of him for the cover... 1-2- last-gasp kickout by Chavo, looks like he’ll be on Raw a little longer...
London makes his way up top, and stands with his feet together on the top turnbuckle for a second... then launches off with a beautiful Moonsault... nobody’s home! Chavo rolls out the way, and London totally faceplants into the mat with a loud ‘clap’ – Chavo looks to take advantage, as the momentum of the missed Moonsault brings London to his feet, and Chavo boots him in the gut... one Suplex... he rolls, they both get up... two Suplexes... Chavo brings them both to their feet once more... the Three Amigos connects! London is dazed on the mat, and Chavo decides he needs to put this thing away – he clambers up the turnbuckle, and points to the sky... Frog Splash connects! The crowd boos as Chavo connects with his finisher, and the Mexican Warrior covers, knowing he’s just won his first match in a long time... 1-2-3! It’s official! Chavo Guerrero stays on Monday nights!
Winner: Chavo Guerrero
Match Time: 6:13
Chavo drops to his knees and clutches his face as the crowd boo him – London looks frustrated and hits the mat a couple of times as he gets up shakily. As Chavo rolls out of the ring, suddenly taking on a cockier attitude, he struts his way back up the ramp, as if telling himself, and everyone, he knew he could do it all along.
Cole: And that’s that – Chavo Guerrero has beaten Paul London with a solid performance, and if Shane McMahon lives up to his word, he’ll be thrown headfirst into the United States Title scene.
King: And after so many superstars on Raw have said that they want shots at that same gold too, I bet Paul London will be looking to get straight back in the title hunt after that loss.
Cole: And don’t forget, at Armageddon, there will be a 6-Man Battle Royal where the winner will earn themselves a United States Championship shot in the weeks following. While that would be a great opportunity, no doubt both Chavo and Paul would want to face the Miz for the title at Armageddon rather than have to beat five other men to earn their shot.
The camera cuts backstage, where Todd Grisham is standing with a mic.
Grisham: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome, the World’s Strongest Tag Team, Montel Vontavious Porter and Mark Henry!
The crowd gives a powerful cheer for MVP and the World’s Strongest Man as the camera zooms out to show both men.
Grisham: Gentlemen, you’re not in action tonight, but later on, Legacy will face off against the Unified Tag Team Champions for a title match against them at Armageddon, as you will next week. Will you be watching that match?
MVP gestures he’ll answer that question and the mic comes his way.
MVP: Well, yeah, Todd. You bet. The thing is... last week, Cody Rhodes beat me.
Mild boos greet MVP’s words.
MVP: And I have only myself to blame. But next week, I get myself a chance at redemption, when Mark and I take on the Big Show and Chris Jericho.
The crowd boos the mention of Jericho.
MVP: We want those titles so bad, and we’re not gonna just give up because of one setback. So this week, we’re gonna sit back and enjoy the action, as should all the fans, and watch Legacy show us all why they aren’t tag title contenders.
A good cheer goes up for the bashing of Legacy. Mark Henry moves over and speaks into the mic.
Henry: And next week will be just the beginning for us, when we beat the Tag Team Champions. Cause after that, we can put last week out of our heads and out of the heads of the people whose opinion we care about, the people who pay their money to watch us.
A big cheer goes up for Henry’s somewhat kiss-ass line.
Henry: And then, as we said last week in the VIP Lounge, we’re gonna head on to Armageddon, and win the WWE Unified Tag Team Championships. The World’s Strongest Tag Team will be back in business next week, you better believe it! Watch... this... space.
Henry quickly checks with a smiling MVP that he has nothing else to say, then the pair nod a thanks at Grisham and head on their way. The camera cuts back to the ring, where a large cheer goes up as the crowd look away from the TitanTron, and see, as do we all, that there are some beach chairs, a table, and a bowl of exotic fruit in the ring. Palm trees stand on the corners of the ring, and the ringside staff have laid out a yellow ring-carpet to add to the beach feel – a new touch to Carlito’s Cabana, it seems.
I SPIT IN THE FACE, OF PEOPLE WHO DON’T WANT TO BE COOL...
The Orlando crowd give a large cheer as out comes a smiling Carlito, his afro a massive sphere on his head. He struts down the ramp with the body language of a man who looks happy to be back, and he slaps the outstretched hands of the fans at ringside with a few casual swings of his arm. He looks in a good mood...
Roberts: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome... Carlito!
Another big cheer goes up for the Caribbean superstar as he gets in the ring, and gets a mic from the ringside staff. He wanders casually around the ring for a moment, then settles himself in one of the beach chairs and relaxes, enjoying the feel of being back on Raw properly. He closes his eyes and takes in a deep breath, then exhales, opens his eyes, and raises the mic. His accent is as heavy as ever.
Carlito: Carlito is back on Raw.
The crowd cheer. ‘Lito smiles.
Carlito: Thank you. Now, wit de return of Carlito, comes de return... of Carlito’s Cabana.
Another cheer as Carlito uses his free hand to beckon around the brightly themed ring.
Carlito: Man, does it feel good to be back. I’ve been away, relaxing, learning how to fish in Puerto Rico... dat’s not important. What’s important is dat I’m back now.
Carlito pauses as the crowd throws him another, smaller, cheer.
Carlito: While I was away, I still watched on Monday nights. And I saw something. De cockiest, most arrogant man ever to hold de title I won, in my first match in WWE.
A booming cheer greets this one – obviously some of Orlando fans are ignorant to the fact the man he beat that night is now the WWE Champion. Carlito continues.
Carlito: That same man is my guest on de show tonight. The Miz-z-z!
Carlito’s accent gets caught on the Miz’s name, and he stumbles a little. Luckily, the crowd knew where he was going with it, and they were too busy booing the Miz to notice the error. Speak of the devil, the United States Champion’s music booms from the speakers, and out he comes, smirking, but still looking at Carlito with a look of anger after ‘Lito cost him his match with Evan Bourne the week before. As the Miz comes down the ramp, highlights are shown of last week’s match between Miz and Bourne. As the camera cuts back, the Miz is slowly getting into the ring, looking scornfully at the ring set-up. He is given a mic, and Carlito beckons for him to take a seat – the Miz postpones doing so for as long as possible, then slowly lowers himself into the other chair, but he doesn’t get as comfortable as Carlito, sitting up instead. Carlito raises his mic, but the Miz cuts him off abruptly-
Miz: Don’t try it. Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing, trying to play mind games with me, the Miz, cause I’m too good for that, and I know you want this.
Carlito looks taken aback as Miz interrupts him, and points to his title. The crowd heaps boos on him.
Miz: Let’s cut to the chase. I only agreed to the joke of a show so I could come down here and give you a warning, Carlito. You don’t get to come down to the ring while I’m in a match. That’s a big no-no. I’m the United States Champion. But you already knew that, didn’t you?
The Miz casts Carlito a patronising look as boos fall on the deaf ears of the Miz.
Miz: I don’t know how long you’ve been gone, because frankly, I don’t care and I couldn’t be bothered to waste my valuable time finding out, but you need to learn something about how Raw works now. Maybe back when you were still here, before you took a break, it was acceptable to walk down and ruin the United States Champion’s match. Maybe that’s just how much of an idiot you are. You don’t understand the consequences... of your actions.
Boos rain down on the Miz as Carlito frowns.
Miz: And I would be very careful about doing it again, because I’m not gonna let it slide any more. So, consider this me letting you off the hook. I’m gonna give you the chance to walk away, and get the hell outta my life, outta my matches, and outta my title contender’s pool, cause I’ve got enough of ‘em who are perfectly happy to wait their turn to get their asses kicked.
Miz smirks, then his eyes goes wide in mock realisation.
Miz: Oh wait, that’s right, you’re from Puerto Rico – you don’t understand a word I’ve been saying. How inconsiderate of me.
Carlito continues to frown and the crowd continues to boo. Miz stands up and speaks deliberately slowly, patting his title as he does.
Miz: You... can’t... have... this. Do... you... understand... me?
Carlito stands to face his adversary.
Carlito: Ok, ju listen to me. When ju and I go at it in de ring, I’ll take dat title from you. Don’t kid jurself, ju know I speak de truth.
Miz stares straight back into the eyes of Carlito.
Carlito: Shane McMahon told me dat next week, I’m geddin’ back in the ring. Next week, ju’ll see what I can do, and see what I’m gonna do to you when I get my chance at dat title o’ yours. Now dat’s cool!
A cheer goes up for Carlito’s catchphrase. Both men continue to stare each other down, their faces only inches apart. They stay in these positions for about 15 seconds, before the Miz tosses his mic from the ring – a second later, so does the Caribbean superstar. The crowd start to roar Carlito’s name, and the pair continue to stare into each other’s eyes with an unrivalled intensity (poetic, I know). Suddenly, the Miz boots Carlito in the gut, prompting a heap of boos from the crowd, and runs into the ropes, going for the Reality Check, but Carlito moves his head, causing Miz to grab at thin air as he runs past... and Carlito drops him with the Backstabber! The crowd goes wild as Miz clutches his back on the mat, and Carlito gets up on the turnbuckle, raising both arms as he proclaims ‘Now dat’s cool! Yeah!’ The commentators rave on about how Carlito has done a number on the United States Champion, and Raw goes to a break.
As Raw returns, we go to the announce table, where Michael Cole and Jerry ‘the King’ Lawler are sitting. No surprises there then.
Cole: Hello and welcome back to Raw. Before the break, we saw the return of Carlito’s Cabana, with special guest, the United States Champion, the Miz, who felt the force of a Backstabber after a heated confrontation between him and the Caribbean superstar.
King: Yeah, Cole, it looks like for the second week in a row, Carlito’s staked a giant claim as to why he deserves that title match at Armageddon.
Cole: Yup, King, but you need to remember that there are tonnes of superstars who have their sights set on the arrogant Chick Magnet’s gold, including Chavo Guerrero, Paul London, who returned earlier tonight, as well as the members of a tag team match scheduled for later tonight, when Evan Bourne will team with the brother of the man which just saw, Primo Colon, to take on the mismatched duo of Santino Marella and ‘the Masterpiece’ Chris Masters.
King: Add Carlito to the mix, and you have 7 wannabe contenders!
Cole: Exactly, King. One of those seven will battle the Miz at Armageddon for the title, and the other six will be involved in an Over-the-Top-Rope Battle Royal at the pay-per-view, the winner of which will face the United States Champion as we lead up to Royal Rumble.
King: That makes my head hurt, Cole.
...IT’S A NEW DAAAAAY!
The bell rings and Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes make their way out on to the stage to strong booing. They look at each other briefly, then begin to walk down the ramp, staring around the arena.
Roberts: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, weighing at 458 pounds... Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase, two-thirds of the Legacy!
More boos greet the announcement as the cocky young team get in the ring, and have a small team talk as they wait for the WWE Unified Tag Team Champions. Their music subsides.
WEEEEELL... BREAK THE WALLS DOWN!
The crowd don’t know how to react at first, but they all wait expectantly, wondering about whether the Big Show will be alongside Chris Jericho. Jericho slowly wanders out, scornfully looking at the ring and the arena, prompting a tonne of boos to be thrown at him. Legacy look at each other with a smirk, knowing it could be an easy one, and Jericho strides down the ramp, titles on his shoulders, and looking behind him occasionally, almost as if Big Show is going to come out yelling ‘Sorry I’m late.’ Yeah... not happening.
Roberts: And their opponent? Weighing in at 231 pounds, he is one half of the WWE Unified Tag Team Champions... Chris Jericho!
The crowd boo him, but Jericho obviously has other things on his mind. Replays show of Jericho’s brutal attack on the Undertaker on last week’s SmackDown, and Legacy are starkly reminded of what Jericho is capable of. Jericho gets in the ring, and the commentators mention that Show is obviously not here – Jericho tosses his titles to the referee, and the man in the middle decides to start the match as a 2-on-1.
Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase vs Chris Jericho
It goes without saying that this match was always going to be in Legacy’s favour, and that’s just about how it’s panned out so far as we approach 5 minutes, with Legacy keeping themselves fresh with frequent tags. Jericho has been hard to put away, however, and he’s been fighting back, even connecting with the Lionsault on DiBiase. As we join the match, Rhodes is pounding Jericho in Legacy’s own corner, and as he is forced to stop by the count, he tags in DiBiase, who peels Jericho from the corner, and flings him across the ring – Jericho comes back off the ropes, ducks under a clothesline, then turns, and kicks DiBiase in the side. He runs back into the ropes, then brings DiBiase to the mat with a simple clothesline. Jericho grabs DiBiase’s legs... and turns him into the Walls of Jericho! The crowd boos, but DiBiase refuses to tap out, straining with clenched teeth as Jericho yells for DiBiase to tap.
Suddenly, the lights go out! The crowd has a reason to cheer in this fight between hated superstars, and the crowd roars as it looks like the Deadman is back! Suddenly, the lights come back on, and Jericho is looking around the ring, having let DiBiase out of the Walls of Jericho. The crowd are disappointed that there’s no Undertaker, and Jericho starts yelling ‘Yeah! Exactly! He’s not coming back, you hear me? He’s gone! Gone!’ Meanwhile, DiBiase tags in Cody Rhodes, and the cocky youngster charges in, and clutches Jericho in an Inverted Facelock... Cross Rhodes connects! Rhodes knocks someone out cold with his brutal finisher for the second week in a row, and this week he claims the scalp of Chris Jericho! Rhodes covers for the inevitable result, 1-2-3!
Winners: Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase
Match Time: 5:52
Jericho is knocked out after the force of the vicious Cross Rhodes, and Rhodes and DiBiase smirk as they have their hands raised by the referee.
Cole: Well, without the Big Show, Chris Jericho always had his hands full tonight, but his one opportunity at winning the match was taken from him by the impromptu trademark of the man Chris Jericho brutally beat down last week on SmackDown, the Undertaker.
King: I knew the Undertaker wouldn’t be back, Cole, not after the beating he took last week.
Cole: And not to mention, Chris Jericho will be doing this again next week, against Mark Henry and MVP, and again the week after, against D-Generation X!
ARE YOU READY?
‘Nice timing’ says King. The crowd gives a booming cheer as the arena turns green, and Legacy in the ring look annoyed by the interruption. Chris Jericho, who is coming round on the outside, his hand on the security barricade to keep his wobbly body up, looks shocked as Triple H and Shawn Michaels appear on the stage, smiling. Each man has glowsticks in their hands, and they fling them across the arena, as if the majority of the fans didn’t already have them – green ‘X’s form a giant, though patchy, ocean across the crowd, and DX receive a tremendous ovation as they come down the ramp. They get into the ring, are handed mics, and Triple H goes to talk first.
Triple H: Cody... Ted... congratulations on making it to Armageddon. I only hope you’ll be as good when you have to face more than one opponent at once.
The crowd give a giant mocking cheer and Legacy aren’t amused.
Triple H: Last week, you obviously thought it was a good idea to attack us after our match – that didn’t work out too well for you, did it? All you did was put yourselves in a very dangerous position.
Legacy look a little taken aback by the Game’s threats. Michaels takes to the mic.
Michaels: Ya see, kids, we showed you earlier this year what happens when you get on the wrong side of us. I would expect you to know not to do that again. Still, obviously... you’re not very smart people, because you went and did it anyway.
Triple H raises his mic as Legacy take a step back from the deadly serious DX. Chris Jericho starts to back his way up the ramp, still facing the ring.
Triple H: We’re not against the Tag Champions next week – by the way, Chris, see you in two weeks, we’ll be sure to make you wish you’d never come here.
Jericho’s eyes go wide for a second, then he hardens and starts yelling ‘You can’t talk to me like that! I took out the Undertaker! I could do the same to you, Hunter! I could do the same to you!’
Triple H: Yeah, yeah. Anyway, because none of us are in action next week, we figured we’d like to give you a taste of what’ll happen to you at Armageddon...
Rhodes grabs a mic quickly from ringside.
Rhodes: Obviously you two are out of your heads, challenging us. Did you see what we just did? We just won ourselves a title shot at Armageddon. We’ve just started on our road to recapturing the Tag Titles that are rightfully ours.
Boos for Rhodes. DiBiase asks for the mic, and he gets it. Meanwhile, Jericho has shuffled backstage.
DiBiase: Damn straight, Cody. Firstly, you two can’t just schedule a match for next week, who the hell do you think you are? Secondly... if we got in the ring, it wouldn’t be a contest. Not any more. Don’t you get it? We’re faster, stronger, and just plain better now. We’ve grown. We’re one title match away from further cementing our ‘Legacy’ in this business. So give it up. Just leave. You’re not getting a match with us next week, and that’s final.
The crowd boos. DX frown, and Legacy smirk, but before anything else can be said-
HERE COMES THE MONEEEEEY!
The crowd cheers mildly for Shane McMahon as the Raw General Manager appears on the stage, a mic in his hand.
Shane: Unfortunately, Ted, that’s not your decision to make. It’s mine.
The crowd cheers, and DiBiase frowns, as does Rhodes.
Shane: And you know what? I think a DX versus Legacy rematch sounds great.
The crowd and DX agree, the former with a bunch of warm cheers.
Shane: So, next week, Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase are going to take on Triple H and Shawn Michaels!
A giant cheer goes up.
Shane: And that’s that.
Shane walks backstage, and DX and Legacy have a staredown as Raw goes to a break.
As Raw returns, we are backstage. Melina is talking to Gail Kim. Neither woman is in their ring gear, and after a small conversation, Kim says a goodbye and leaves. Melina begins to walk the other way, but her path is suddenly blocked by Maryse, who speaks with her usual strong French-Canadian accent, and her grammar is somewhat sketchy. The crowd boos.
Maryse: Oh, look who it is. Ze fake Champion.
More boos are thrown at Maryse.
Melina: The fake Champion?
Maryse: Yes, Ze fake Champion. Had I not been injured, I would have zat title around my waist long ago, no? Zanks for holding it for me. You forget zat not only am I ze strongest and... ha... ze sexiest of all ze Divas, I am ze smartest, too.
Maryse: Last week, I showed you zat I will do anythink to win ze Divas Championship.
Melina cuts her off.
Melina: Like stab your friends in the back?
Maryse’s smile gets bigger.
Maryse: Say what you will. I proved zat I am ruthless, unpredictable... unbeatable. You know you are intimidated by me, and I don’t blame you. After all, I destroyed 3 Divas last week with my French Kiss, and you... you’re scared of it. Because you know at Armageddon, you’re going to feel it too. And zen, when you look up from ze mat, you’ll see me, holding my Diva’s Championship.
More boos for Maryse. Melina, clearly angered by Maryse’s words, fights back.
Melina: You know what, Maryse? Fine. Have it your way. Keep telling yourself you’re the best. You just keep telling yourself you can beat me. When Armageddon comes around, I’ll enjoy watching the expression on your face when you lose.
Maryse’s face quickly turns sour.
Melina: Have a good night, Maryse.
Melina says it with sarcasm and she leaves, leaving for the camera to zoom in on Maryse’s bitter expression. The camera cuts elsewhere backstage, where Shane McMahon is sitting in his office. Suddenly, the door bursts open, and in marches a jubilant Chavo Guerrero. Shane isn’t amused. He echoes last week-
Shane: What do you want, Chavo?
Chavo: Yo, homes, remember last week? You tried to get rid of me, huh? Well, looks like you underestimated Chavo Guerrero, huh Shane? And now, I think you owe me a shot at that United States Title match at Armageddon, don’t ya, homes?
Shane rolls his eyes.
Shane: Chavo, firstly, don’t even think about coming into my office and attempting to rub anything you’ve done in my face, because I’m three times as successful as you, and I’m... your... boss.
Chavo looks like he regrets coming to gloat.
Shane: Secondly, one win means nothing to me. I said you had to earn your place as a contender, and I meant it. So, seeing as you say you’re so great... next week, you can have a match against Kofi Kingston!
The crowd roars as Chavo takes a huge breath in, in total disbelief.
Shane: And as with this week’s stipulation, we have an ‘if’ involved.
Chavo bites his lip.
Shane: You win, I’ll put you in a match the week after, where the winner will face the Miz for the United States Championship at Armageddon.
A corner of Chavo’s mouth curls.
Shane: If you lose... well, you can kiss your United States Title hopes goodbye.
Chavo looks doubtful as the crowd cheers for that part of the stipulation.
Shane: And Chavo? Yeah, remember last week? We’re done here. Get out.
Chavo, back in his place, shuffles out of the office.
Back in the arena, the bell rings, and Evan Bourne’s music hits, with the crowd giving him a great, welcoming reaction. Bourne wanders out, giving the peace sign to the crowd, and behind him follows a smiling Primo Colon. The crowd cheers the high-flying pairing, who give each other a quick high five to get across that they are looking forward to working together, then start to make their way down the ramp.
Roberts: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, at a combined weight of 401 pounds... the team of Primo Colon, and Evan Bourne!
The crowd give a booming cheer, mainly for Bourne, who is on the end of praise from Cole and King at ringside, who prattle on about his win against the Miz last week. Bourne and Primo slide into the ring, and each get up on a turnbuckle, pandering to the crowd a little, before Bourne’s music subsides, and the classic music of Chris Masters strikes up. The crowd boos, and the lights in the arena dim – the camera shows the Masterpiece on the stage, kneeling in his usual position. The crowd begins to boo him, but suddenly, an Italian singing starts up, and the whole arena lights up with red lighting, completely interrupting an incensed Masters, who gets up in a fury. Out comes Santino Marella, smiling like a madman, until he gets Masters in his face, yelling about how the Italian ruined his entrance. Santino chuckles, and starts walking down the ramp, his infuriated tag team partner slowly following behind.
Roberts: And their opponents! At a combined weight of 492 pounds... Chris Masters and Santino Marella!
The crowd boo for the mismatched pairing, and Masters gives Santino serious evils as they take their places in the corner. Santino goes to start the match as the legal man, but as he goes to step between the ropes from the apron, Masters tells him to get back, and gets in himself – clearly he thinks he can do it himself. The bell rings, and the match gets underway.
Evan Bourne and Primo Colon vs Chris Masters and Santino Marella
Bourne and Masters have been the main men in this match as we approach 6 minutes, with Masters very unwilling to tag his Italian partner in. Eventually, he had, under intense offence from Bourne and Primo, tagged Santino in, and as we join the action, it’s Primo in the ring with Santino, with Primo in control, kicking away at various areas of Santino’s appendage. After a few sharp kicks to the Italian, Primo launches off the ropes, and goes for a Flying Shoulder Block, but Santino rolls out the way, and Primo crashes straight into the mat. As the Puerto Rican rises, the Italian gives him a boot to the gut, smiles that he was able to do it, then takes a moment to tell the crowd just how fantastic he is, in his usual broad accent. Masters facepalms on the apron, obviously wishing he’d never tagged him in, and Santino raises both arms in the air, not realising Primo is up, and right behind him. As Santino turns round, he walks right into the inevitable Dropkick from Primo, to a great crowd reaction, and Santino falls back, lightly bouncing off the ropes, then walking into the centre of the ring, dazed. Primo walks up behind him, and cracks his boot to the back of Santino’s head with force, causing the Italian to go down like a sack of potatoes. Primo drops into a cover... 1-2- no! Chris Masters broke it up! The crowd boos, and the referee yells at a smirking Masters, who backs away, back to the apron.
Primo, frowning, gets up from the mat, and waits for Santino to rise. He does, so Primo throws a kick, but Santino leaps out the way with a scream (yes, a scream) and tags in a groaning Masters, who is clearly wishing he had a different partner. Primo goes on the offensive, but Masters no-sells the punches and kicks of the Puerto Rican, instead scooping him up into a basic Powerslam, then bouncing off the ropes and landing an Elbow Drop. Masters shoots the half... 1-2- kick out by Primo, but Masters isn’t done. He peels Primo from the mat, and easily brings him into a Military Press Hold above his head, walking around the ring to show his strength. The crowd boos, and Primo tries to fight out, but Masters is having none of it – he tosses Primo further upwards, then leaves him to fall neck-first onto the ropes, then plants him with a Big Boot as he cannons back! The crowd groans with the impact, and Masters hooks a leg... 1-2—NO! Primo somehow sneaks a shoulder up, and Masters is roaring for a slow count... replays show he might just have a case! The referee stands by his decision, and brushes aside Masters’ protests with a hard face. With his face a fiery red, Masters turns around – but Primo is gone! Masters looks up with shock, realising that Primo has used the time Masters was protesting to crawl to the other side of the ring, and tag in Evan Bourne, who is now standing on the top turnbuckle!
The crowd roar as Bourne sticks an arm in the air on the top rope, and he launches off, connecting with his patented Diving Double Knee Drop to Masters’ shoulders! Bourne grabs both of Masters’ legs on impact, and the referee slides to the canvas... 1-2- Masters uses his strength to break free of the pinning predicament at the death! Bourne grimaces as he rises, but he’s determined to stay on offence, so as Masters rises, Bourne gives him a few sharp kicks, then starts to move about the ring, trying to use his speed to his advantage, especially with Masters being slightly disorientated after the Double Knee Drop from before. Masters takes a few more kicks, then begrudgingly tags in Marella, who looks like his birthday has come early, and walks straight into a Spinning Savate Kick! Santino goes down clutching his face, and Bourne heads for the top rope, smiling... he launches off – Shooting Star Press! Sensational! The crowd goes wild for Bourne’s extravagant finisher, but Masters runs in to break up the cover... but Primo takes him out with a Dropkick, and Masters falls through the ropes! Bourne smiles, and hooks Santino’s leg... 1-2-3! This one is done!
Winners: Evan Bourne and Primo Colon
Match Time: 7:29
Cole: A great team win for Bourne and Primo here tonight, and that pinfall for Evan will further cement his claim to that United States Championship Match against the Miz at Armageddon he wants so badly.
King: Did you see that Shooting Star Press, Cole? I just can’t get enough of that move! It’s totally awesome!
Cole: It’s pretty fantastic, King. Anyway, coming up next, Shane McMahon will host a press conference of sorts where WWE Champion John Cena will be in the same ring as No. 1 Contender to his title, Jack Swagger. We’ll see you after the break.
The camera cuts to a break, following Cole’s words.
As Raw returns, Shane McMahon is in the ring, standing at a podium.
Shane: Hello all, I’m Shane McMahon, though I’m sure you already knew that... Anyway, let’s get on with this interview session. Introducing first, the WWE Champion, John Cena!
The crowd goes absolutely wild as the arena starts flashing, and out comes Cena, totally pumped, and holding his title on his shoulder. He charges down the ramp with a smile, and slides into the ring, before holding the title high, to a massive reaction. The lights in the arena reflect off the shiny WWE Championship, and Cena drops it back on to his shoulder, before walking over to Shane and shaking his hand quickly. His music dies down.
Shane: And now, the No. 1 Contender to the WWE Championship... Jack Swagger!
CHECK, ONE TWO... OH YEAH!
The crowd boos heavily for the All-American American as he arrives on the ramp, beating his chest. Unlike Cena, he is in street clothes, whereas Cena is dressed in his usual shirt, cap and shorts combo. Swagger wanders down the ramp with a smirk, letting the boos rain down on him – it’s surprising how much more he’s booed this week than he was last. Anyway, Swagger gets in the ring via the steel steps, and both he and Cena are handed mics by Shane McMahon, who holds out a hand to shake for Swagger. Swagger looks at Shane’s hand like Shane’s just stuck it up a cow’s ass, but eventually he shakes it, begrudgingly. Swagger looks at Cena and smirks. Cena, in stark contrast, is staring down his contender, aware that he’ll be facing him in four weeks’ time, and also in the Main Event, albeit with two other men there. Shane starts things off.
Shane: Gentlemen, is there anything either of you have to say?
Swagger is quick to raise his mic to his mouth. Cena never even attempted to, instead he waits to hear what Swagger has to say.
Swagger: Yeah, I got something to say... since you’re asking.
Swagger stops talking for a second, and ‘You suck!’ chants start up around the arena.
Swagger: John Cena. Hi. You know who I am, I take it?
Swagger begins to pace a little, though he never takes his eyes off Cena, who doesn’t answer his question.
Swagger: Yeah, don’t answer that, I know you do. I’m sure I don’t have to explain my credentials to you, do I? Cause I’m sure you know that I’m a two-time All-American, I’m sure you know that I’m a former ECW Champion, and I’m sure you know that I proved that I can hold my own with Raw’s elite last week, when I beat the man you’ve failed to beat on so many occasions, Randy Orton.
The crowd boos Swagger, but also the mention of Orton.
Swagger: I didn’t break a sweat. Just like I won’t at Armageddon.
Cena rolls his eyes. He knew this was coming. He raises his mic.
Cena: Ok, I’m gonna have to stop you there.
Swagger looks annoyed, but the crowd cheer.
Cena: Lemme tell you something, Jack, cause you need to understand. Jack, a few years ago, I was just like you. I’d just arrived in this business, I was young, I was brash, and I thought I was invincible.
Swagger’s face goes red.
Swagger: No, let me tell you something, Cena! You and I are nothing alike, we never were, we never will be! And you know... why?
Cena purses his lips as Swagger pauses.
Swagger: It’s because I am a natural winner.
The crowd boos.
Swagger: I have been suppressed, held back, restrained, by idiotic guest hosts who like the status quo. They were too scared to give me my chance. They were afraid of me. Afraid of the talent I possess, the talent that no-one else on this planet possesses. But now, I’m free of restrictions. I was given my chance, and I took it. And now I’m No. 1 Contender to the WWE Championship. I’m so close. I’m nearly the Champion.
Swagger smirks at the thought. Shane is watching intently from his podium.
Swagger: So I’m happy to wait a little longer for my chance. Just four little weeks. That’s all it is. December 27th, the historic day when I will win the W... W... E... Championship.
The crowd boos him and Cena takes up the mic.
The crowd roars and Swagger frowns.
Cena: You need a serious reality check, Jack. You can pretend you’re the real deal, you can say you’re the most talented person on the planet. You can strut around Raw because you’re the No. 1 Contender to the most prestigious title in the WWE. You can even get up in the face of the Champion himself, and tell him that you’re practically Champion already.
The crowd boos, because that’s pretty much what Swagger’s been doing.
Cena: But there’s one thing you’ve forgotten... THE CHAMP IS HERE!
Cena points to himself, and the crowd goes nuts as Swagger fumes.
Cena: You wanna talk about Armageddon? Ok, let’s do that. Imagine this. We’re in Denver. The Pepsi Center. There’s twenty-five thousand fans screaming.
Cena: You and I will be in the ring. The WWE Championship is on the line.
Swagger is obviously thinking about it – Cena smirks.
Cena: You’re on my shoulders.
Swagger’s eyes immediately refocus and suddenly he looks intimidated. The crowd goes wild.
Cena: Michael Cole’ll be yelling ‘Vintage John Cena!’ and then I’ll bring you down to earth. I’ll give you that reality check. You can be sure of it.
Swagger’s face is much paler than at the beginning of the promo. Suddenly, he regains himself.
Swagger: You have yourself a vivid imagination there, John. Shame that’s all it is. Your imagination. A dream. A fantasy.
Boos are thrown at Swagger left, right and centre.
Swagger: You obviously don’t have the patience to wait for Armageddon like I do... So I’ll be happy to give you a preview in the Main Event tonight. But Randy Orton and Kofi Kingston mean nothing to me. Tonight, I only care about taking you down.
Swagger: You’re just like Randy Orton. You don’t take me seriously, either. After tonight, you can bet your sorry ass you will.
Swagger drops his mic and slowly backs out of the ring. Cena doesn’t avert his gaze from the All-American American, and Shane, who looks like he’s happy he didn’t have to do much, nods at Cena, and goes to leave. Raw goes to a break.
Michael Cole and Jerry ‘the King’ Lawler are there as Raw returns.
Cole: Welcome back to Monday Night Raw, we are live in Orlando, Florida, and before the break we saw another of many heated confrontations we’ve seen over the course of tonight’s show – there are some pretty heated rivalries on Raw at the moment!
King: Yup, Cole, there’s John Cena and Jack Swagger, Randy Orton and Kofi Kingston, and the Miz and Carlito! Not to mention, Maryse and Melina, the war over the Tag Team Titles, and Jamie Noble and Sheamus are all fierce battles on the red brand currently!
Cole: And speaking of Noble and Sheamus, let’s have a look back over what happened last week...
Replays show of last week’s events, where all the speech has an eerie echo:
<<<Clip shows Noble in the ring with a mic.
Noble: Tonight marks a new Jamie Noble...
Replays show of Sheamus’ beatdown on Noble two weeks beforehand.
Noble: I’m gonna show y’all. Jamie Noble’s not taking no crap no more...
Sheamus Powerbombs Noble on the outside.
Noble: When I beat you, Sheamus, every last superstar in that, there, locker room – every last one – will look at me, and they’ll think... he ain’t lion food...
Clip shows Noble in the ring again, talking.
Noble: Not no more...
The camera fades to show Sheamus’ backstage interview. While he talks, Sheamus’ beatdown of Noble continues to replay and replay.
Sheamus: I wasn’t trying to put him in hospital, I was trying to end his career...
Sheamus’ smirking face during the interview fills the screen.
Sheamus: I’m gonna finish what I started two weeks ago. Jamie Noble, I accept your challenge...
Another showing of the brutal Powerbomb.
Sheamus: But I warn you. Next week on Raw, I won’t be playing to win the match, oh no. I’ll be playing to put you out of this business... for good.
‘For good’ echoes over and over...>>>
The camera fades into the arena, where the bell rings, and the music of Jamie Noble starts to play. The crowd give him a warm cheer, and the Pit Bull has a little smile on his face as he makes his way onto the stage. He raises an arm with a new-found confidence, and as he slowly makes his way down the ramp, he slaps the hands of the fans at ringside with a little smile – it’s been a while since the fans wanted to slap his hand, clearly.
Roberts: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Hanover, West Virginia, weighing at 202 pounds... Jamie Noble!
The crowd give Noble a nice cheer as he gets in the ring, and he bounces off the ropes a little, psyching himself up for one of the most meaningful matches of his career. Some fans in the corner of the arena start a ‘Let’s go Jamie!’ chant, and soon the whole arena is at it – Noble can’t help but smile, and the only thing to stop the chant is Sheamus’ music, which prompts booing from the crowd as the Celtic Warrior steps out on to the stage. Sheamus looks in the mood for a fight, unfortunately for Jamie, and Noble’s smile is wiped from his face as he looks at the pale-skinned Irishman, who slowly starts to stride down the ramp, the expression on his face one of hate for Noble.
Roberts: And his opponent! From Dublin, Ireland, weighing in at 272 pounds... he is the Celtic Warrior... Sheamus!
A new wave of boos fall on Sheamus, who gets in the ring, and looks at Noble with disgust. Noble looks nervous, and he paces around a little, then bounces his heels. The commentators mention it’s Noble’s biggest match to date (debateable, he’s been a Cruiserweight Champion before, but nevertheless it’s a big match) and the referee calls for the bell.
Jamie Noble vs Sheamus
Though Sheamus has dominated much of the match-up, he hasn’t gone for a single pin attempt, living up to his word from last week. As we join the match at around 6 and a half minutes, Sheamus is choking Noble on the ropes, and the referee forces him to break the count, which he does at 4. As Noble gasps for air on the mat, Sheamus decides not to let up his offence, and grabs Noble from the canvas, yanking him up to his feet by his head. Noble is too dazed to protect himself, and Sheamus knees him in the gut, lifts him on to his shoulders, then wanders into the centre of the ring, before dropping him into a brutal Powerslam! The crowd groans with the impact, and Sheamus follows up with a nasty Leg Drop to Noble’s neck – the Pit Bull rolls away as it connects, his eyes filled with pain and anguish. He scrambles towards the ropes, attempting to use them to get to his feet, but Sheamus kicks away his outstretched arm, then stomps on the back of Noble’s head, driving his face into the canvas with a thump. The crowd groans as Noble’s head cannons off the mat, and Sheamus kneels on the mat beside him, and whispers something at Noble – the Pit Bull, shaking, brings his head up, and shakes it defiantly, then spits in Sheamus’ face!
The crowd goes wild as Sheamus reels backward slightly, and Noble, with clenched teeth, starts to make his way to his feet, as the crowd gets behind him... but Sheamus brings everyone, including Noble, back to earth with a ground-shattering Double Axe Handle to the back of Noble’s head! The crowd’s cheering is stopped dead, and the arena is suddenly silent. Noble is unmoving on the mat, and Sheamus drags him into the centre of the ring by his legs, before lifting him to his feet again. Noble stands limp for a second, but as his eyes refocus, Sheamus puts a crunching right hand to the side of Noble’s face, and the Pit Bull collapses with a groan. Sheamus gets back down on his knees by Noble, and yells at him ‘What aboot now, Noble? What aboot now?’ Noble raises his head slowly once more, his face bright red, and out of breath. He shakes his head, and tries to make his way up. Sheamus swears under his breath out of exasperation, and stands. He wanders over to the other side of the ring, and yells ‘You think I’m done with you, Noble? Oh yeah? Get up! Get up!’ Noble moans on the mat, and slowly, his hand catches the middle rope, and he starts to haul his way to his feet, and limply, he stands by the ropes – the Pit Bull inches his way towards the middle of the ring, but falls back a little towards a turnbuckle, and Sheamus charges, looking for his vicious Bicycle Kick...
But Noble dodges it! Michael Cole screams ‘You’re not serious!’ and the crowd goes absolutely nuts for Noble – Sheamus misses Noble as he ducks underneath the kick, and Sheamus kicks the turnbuckle behind the Pit Bull! The Celtic Warrior howls in pain as he kicks the turnbuckle with all his force available, and Noble looks to take advantage, starting to crawl up the turnbuckle (and I mean crawl, he has very little energy left, it seems) and jumps off with all the energy he has... he connects with an immense Leg Lariat! Sheamus goes down, and Noble crashes to the mat too! Both men look totally out of it, and it’s Noble who moves first, sensing a victory could be in sight... he drapes a single arm over Sheamus... 1-2- Sheamus denies Noble a famous victory! Sheamus stays on the mat, teeth clenched, and Noble tries to stay on the offensive – he crawls over to Sheamus... and locks in his Dragon Sleeper! Sheamus’ head is bent backwards in a nastily awkward position, while both men are kneeling... the Celtic Warrior refuses to tap, and as the commentators mention Noble nearly put Vladimir Kozlov to sleep with this same move once, Noble screams for Sheamus to give in... Sheamus lets out a giant roar and begins to force Noble off him... but Noble holds strong, and Sheamus’ body is being contorted backwards! Immense pressure on Sheamus’ neck and back, and the Irishman is roaring out... the referee asks him if he wants to give in... and Sheamus elbows Noble in the groin!
The referee never saw it, his positioning meant he was blind to the illegal move, and Noble reels away in pain as the crowd heaps boos on the Celtic Warrior. Cole yells about the underhanded move by the Irishman, and Noble’s face has pain all over. Sheamus gets up, grunting, still feeling the effects of the Dragon Sleeper... He picks Noble up after a few moments of recovery for both men, and whips him to the ropes... and connects with a Big Boot to the Pit Bull! Noble goes down, and Sheamus has a maniacal smile on his face for a second, before he picks Noble back up, and lifts him high into a Vertical Suplex position... Powerslam! The crowd let out a giant collective groan as Sheamus plants Noble with a massive Jackhammer-like move, and he stands over Noble’s practically lifeless body on the mat with an expression of fury – he looks pretty frustrated that Noble hasn’t had enough. He peels Noble from the mat, and pulls him into a corner. He brings the Pit Bull into the Crucifix Powerbomb position... this would be it for Noble... but the Pit Bull slips out! Noble rolls Sheamus up... 1-2-3! Unbelievable! JAMIE NOBLE HAS WON IT!
Winner: Jamie Noble
Match Time: 10:05
Jamie Noble has beaten Sheamus! The entire of the Amway Arena is on its feet, and Jamie Noble looks like he’s just won the World Heavyweight Championship! Sheamus is absolutely stunned, and Michael Cole is yelling incomprehensible nonsense into his headset like nobody’s business! As Roberts announces Noble is the winner, the referee hoists his arm into the air, and the smile on Noble’s face is absolutely huge! What a moment for Jamie Noble! The Pit Bull has beaten the Celtic Warrior! The referee releases Noble’s hand, and he drops to his knees, not believing what he’s done. The same small contingent of fans as last time in the far corner start up a ‘Well done Jamie!’ chant, and, as with last time, the whole arena takes it up, and Noble clambers on to a turnbuckle, thanking the fans. Sheamus backs up the ramp, fuming about what happened, but willing to wait for his revenge, it seems, and leaves Noble to have his moment.
Cole: A magnificent win for Jamie Noble tonight, and the Pit Bull has shown us all just what he can do.
King: He was deflated, he was bruised, and he was battered in that match. How he managed to pull out that amazing result is beyond me.
Cole: You’re very right, King. Jamie Noble had little to no energy left, yet he gave every last drop of strength he had to make sure he could beat Sheamus.
King: And it’s a good thing, too – Sheamus kept beating him down! The Celtic Warrior wanted to end Jamie’s career tonight, but no matter how much Sheamus brutalised him, Jamie would just not give up. He would not let Sheamus have his way!
Cole: And so, Jamie Noble’s journey to proving the world he’s not ‘lion food’ has taken its first, giant step tonight, with a huge upset win, and an amazing performance, against the fierce Celtic Warrior, Sheamus.
The camera cuts from Jamie Noble’s smiling face, as Raw goes to a break.
As Raw returns, we go backstage briefly, where Randy Orton is making his way down a corridor, heading for the ring, for the Main Event. Suddenly, he encounters the other two members of Legacy, who show no emotion as they see him – there’s clear tension between the Viper and his comrades after their confrontation last week. They stand in silence for a moment, then Cody Rhodes starts to speak.
Rhodes: Do you respect us yet, Randy?
Randy tilts his head upwards as he often does, measuring Rhodes and DiBiase.
Rhodes: Earlier we won ourselves a Tag Team Title shot at Armageddon. Do you still see us as lazy? Do you still see us as not being ‘deserving’? Huh?
Orton ponders for a second.
Orton: All I saw tonight was the pair of you narrowly avoiding defeat against one man, followed by you both trying to cowardly run away from a match against two men I’ve beaten on multiple occasions...
DiBiase and Rhodes frown at the accusation of cowardice, considering Orton has been guilty of being a coward countless times during his career.
Orton: You haven’t impressed me at all this evening. You both need to try harder. You want me to respect you... yet you give me no reason to.
Rhodes and DiBiase realise Orton may have a point and look away, frustrated.
Orton: Next week is the perfect opportunity for you to prove yourselves. So do it. In the meantime, I have a match, so...
Orton looks both men down, then slowly stalks away, leaving Rhodes and DiBiase humbled, and leaning against the wall.
The camera cuts to the ring, where the bell rings.
SOS... I HEAR ‘DEM SHOUTIN’! SOS... I HEAR ‘DEM CRYIN’!
The crowd gives a big roar for Kofi Kingston as he bursts out on to the stage, and slaps his hands together three times, with three bursts of fireworks greeting him. He begins to bounce his way down the ramp, kicking his heels.
Roberts: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Ghana, West Africa, weighing in at 221 pounds... Kofi Kingston!
Another big roar goes up for Kofi as he springs over the top rope into the ring, and he leaps up onto the turnbuckle, doing his traditional ‘boom’ hand motion – some fans in the crowd decide to join in, with their friends beside them pretending they don’t know them. Fair enough. Kofi hops down from the turnbuckle, and John Cena’s music bursts out! The arena gives an absolutely huge, long lasting roar as the WWE Champion excitably jumps out on to the stage, and Kofi grins in the ring, happy he has a strong partner.
Roberts: And his tag team partner, from West Newbury, Massachusetts, weighing in 240 pounds... he is the WWE Champion... John Cena!
Cena gets in the ring with a smile, and touches knuckles with Kofi, which provokes a great response from the crowd. Cena lifts his championship into the air briefly with a grin, and then hands it gently to a ringside staff member with a ‘thank you’.
CHECK, ONE TWO... OH YEAH!
The cheers for Cena turn into boos for Jack Swagger, who struts out from behind the metal curtain, smirking. He beats his chest on the ramp, then signals to Cena he wants the title with a waist motion, before making his way down the ramp.
Roberts: And their opponents! First, from Perry, Oklahoma, weighing in at 263 pounds... the All-American American, Jack Swagger!
Swagger grins as he comes down the ramp, never taking his eyes off Cena. He gets in the ring, but stays well away from his opponents, instead walking to the other side of the ring, and resting on the opposite turnbuckle to Cena and Kingston.
I HEAR VOICES IN MY HEAD, THEY COUNSEL ME, THEY UNDERSTAND... THEY TALK TO ME!
Immense booing follows these words as Randy Orton makes his way out, surveying the arena for the second time in the evening, looking at the crowd with distaste. As he starts coming down the ramp, he smirks and turns his head to see if the fan who shouted at him earlier is feeling confident – he’s not, and when he sees Orton looking his way, he looks away nervously. Still smirking, Orton continues his descent down the ramp.
Roberts: And his tag team partner, from St. Louis, Missouri, weighing in at 245 pounds... Randy Orton!
A whole new truckload of boos is delivered to Orton as he gets in the ring, metaphorically of course, and he barely glances at Swagger as he moves towards his corner – obviously there is still tension between the two after their battle the previous week. It’ll be Swagger starting the match against Kingston, it seems, and the referee kicks things off.
John Cena and Kofi Kingston vs Randy Orton and Jack Swagger
This match hasn’t had that much amazing action, but Kofi did plant Swagger with a great Floatover DDT early on, which surprised everyone. As we join the match at 8 minutes, Randy Orton is dominating Kofi, who is grounded. Orton stomps all over Kofi... right knee... right ankle... left ankle... left shin... stomach... and then finishes off with a nasty one to the head! Kofi lets out a little gasp of pain as he rolls away, and tries to get up, but Orton pulls him up himself, then pushes him to the ropes, then connects with a Falling Clothesline. Orton covers... 1-2 kickout from Kofi. Orton pulls Kingston to his feet, and tags in Swagger, who boots Kingston in the gut, and whips him to the turnbuckle... then follows up with a big Corner Body Splash! Kingston groans as he falls away from the turnbuckle, and Swagger spins him round, then flings him across the ring with a German Suplex! The crowd groans, and Swagger scrambles across the ring, he’ll shoot the half... 1-2- another kickout from Kofi. Swagger gets him back up, then whips him to the ropes... when he comes back, Swagger goes for a clothesline, but Kofi ducks under it, bounces off the other side, then connects with a Dropkick! Swagger falls backwards, lightly bounces off the ropes, then is grabbed by Kofi... Russian Legsweep! Kofi’s charismatic Legsweep connects!
Both Kofi and Swagger are down – Cena is pushing the ropes as far as they go, stretching his hand out for Kofi to tag... The referee starts to count... 1... 2... 3... 4... Both Kingston and Swagger start to stir... 5... 6... Kofi crawls towards Cena... 7... 8... Kofi launches himself, tags in the WWE Champion, and here he comes! Swagger gets the tag to Orton, and the pair meet in the middle – Cena flies forward, catching the Viper with a Flying Shoulder Block... both men rise... and another! Orton stupidly throws a clothesline, giving Cena the opening for the... Protobomb! Cena stands, and holds his arm high, the crowd goes wild! He waves that hand in front of Orton’s face, and the whole crowd chants ‘You can’t see me’ and Cena goes for it – he bounces off the ropes, and... lands the Five Knuckle Shuffle! The crowd goes nuts, and Cena waits for Orton to rise... he does, and Cena lifts him onto his shoulders... but Orton gets out of it, and goes for his Inverted Backbreaker... but Cena reverses out of it, spinning out of the hold, bounces off the ropes, and plants Orton’s face into the mat with his One-Handed Bulldog!
The crowd goes wild again, and Cena goes up top... Orton slowly gets up, but he’s conveniently placed... Cena launches off... but ORTON HITS THE RKO AS CENA IS IN THE AIR! The sudden silence from the crowd is unbelievable, and the WWE Champion looks almost knocked out... Orton scrambles into the cover... 1-2-- NO! Cena got his hand on the ropes at the very last second, literally milliseconds before the referee’s hand hit the mat for three! The crowd goes insane for Cena, and the noise is deafening inside the Amway Arena! Randy Orton can’t believe his eyes, and neither can Kingston or Swagger! Kingston starts yelling for a tag, and Orton decides to put Cena away before that can happen... he rolls Cena, who is barely awake, out on to the apron, and pulls him up, and through the gap between the middle and top ropes... Cena is hung on the ropes in DDT position! Orton measures him... then drives him into the mat with the Rope-Hung DDT! The crowd groans as this happens, and both Orton and Cena are exhausted from their battle, but Orton drags the Champ into the middle of the ring, and shoots the half... must be... 1-2—KICKOUT FROM CENA! What determination! Orton yells out lot, but he is drowned out by the roaring Orlando masses, who start chanting ‘Cena! Cena! Cena!’
Orton gets up, and kneels by Cena, breathing heavily. He gets up, then wanders over to Swagger, and tags the All-American American in. Swagger hops into the middle of the ring, and decides Cena needs putting away... he picks him up, and sets him up for the Gutwrench Powerbomb... but Cena feeds him a knee to the gut, and breaks free! Swagger reels backwards, but is too slow to stop Cena falling towards his own corner, tagging in Kingston as he does! Kingston hops over the top rope, and slaps Swagger in the chest a few times, then sends him to the ropes, and leaps up, bringing him to the canvas with a quick Crossbody from a standing position! Impressive stuff! Kofi looks for the cover... 1-2- that’s not enough, Swagger kicks out. Kofi waits for Swagger to rise, then whips him to the corner... before connecting to Swagger’s face with a beautiful Lariat! Orton looks more and more disgusted by Kingston with every move the Ghanaian performs. Kingston falls backwards on his feet, and Swagger wanders into the middle of the ring, then collapses on his back – Kingston kicks up his heels... he’s preparing for the Boom Drop! He bounces off the ropes... theatrics... RKO! ‘Wait, what?’ exclaims Michael Cole, and suddenly everyone realises – Orton has RKO’d Kofi Kingston! Replays show that Orton gets in the ring as Kofi bounces off the ropes, and hits Kofi with the RKO! The referee had been busy telling Cena to stay where he was, as the WWE Champion had tried to stop Orton getting in the ring, meaning the referee didn’t catch the illegal man doing what he did! The ref turns to see Orton escaping, and figures he must have just broken up a pin attempt, so he gives him a scolding, but Cena is yelling – Orton’s totally screwed Kofi over! Swagger gets back up, and sees Kofi on the floor... so he picks him up... and drills him with the Gutwrench Powerbomb! The crowd boos the hell out of Orton and Swagger, and Cena groans as the referee slides to the canvas to count the resulting pin attempt... 1-2-3! Stick a fork in this one!
Winners: Randy Orton and Jack Swagger
Match Time: 11:25
Orton and Swagger have their hands raised by the referee, but both men pull their hands away. Orton smirks at Kingston, broken on the mat, and goes to leave, whereas Swagger looks straight at the WWE Champion, who’s gone to ringside to collect his title. Swagger turns to leave, but then stops as Cena gets into the ring, and goes to check on Kofi... but Swagger blindsides him! The crowd hurls boos at Swagger as he puts a boot to the kneeling Cena’s face, sending him down! Swagger grabs the WWE Championship and takes a look at it briefly before dropping it on the mat... and grabbing Cena! He puts him in a non-too-surprising position... and DROPS HIM WITH THE GUTWRENCH POWERBOMB ON TO THE TITLE! The crowd lets out a collective groan followed by a tonne of boos, and Cena clutches his back in absolute agony on the mat, while Swagger smirks. Cena rolls to the outside, still gasping, and Swagger puts a boot to Kingston, pushing him to the outside also, leaving the All-American American as the last man in the ring. He picks up the WWE Championship and holds it high, yelling ‘You better remember this! This is just a preview of Armageddon!’ and continues to pose with Cena’s title.
Cole: Wow. What a Main Event, but what an underhanded way to win by Randy Orton, and what an underhanded attack afterwards by the No. 1 Contender to the WWE Championship, Jack Swagger.
King: Yup, Cole, but that’s just the kind of person he is. He’s talented, but he sure likes to remind people, and if they don’t listen to him, he doesn’t mind convincing ‘em by doing stuff like that.
Cole: Anyway, that’s all the time we have tonight. I’m Michael Cole, along with Jerry ‘the King’ Lawler, you’ve been watching Monday Night Raw, live in Orlando, Florida. Thanks for watching, we hope to see you again next week.
Raw fades to black with the picture of Jack Swagger holding the WWE Championship high as the last image.
Chavo Guerrero bts. Paul London
Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase bt. Chris Jericho
Evan Bourne and Primo Colon bt. Chris Masters and Santino Marella
Jamie Noble bts. Sheamus
Randy Orton and Jack Swagger bt. John Cena and Kofi Kingston
Announced For Armageddon
John Cena (c) vs Jack Swagger
Kofi Kingston vs Randy Orton
Steel Cage Match
United States Championship
The Miz (c) vs ???
WWE Unified Tag Team Championships
Jerishow (c) vs Legacy
Melina (c) vs Maryse
??? vs ??? vs ??? vs ??? vs ??? vs ???
United States Title No. 1 Contender Match