Today is the day for a major announcement concerning this BTB...the announcement of who my other writers are! (Drum roll, please...)
When it comes to ECW...the new writer is going to be the one...the only...LEEROY-RIZ!!!
When it comes to Smackdown...he is South Carolina's Shinin' Light...JDawgWWE!!! (And for those of you worrying about him posting before his 30 days...don't. He won't post a show till after the 23rd.)
Welcome to the future of BTB, guys! The Phenomenon is about to strike!
__________________
TPS Rap Quote
If you ain’t Million Dollar Dreamin’ then we op-pee-sites, in high school I was voted the most Ted DiBiase’st. Also the most slept on, cause my Ted DiBiaseness, an Inglorious Bastard, and you looking like a Nazi bitch. Lupe Fiasco/The One/Enemy Of The State
The Phenomenon Strikes: In Serious Question
TPS Is Writing Album Reviews. Lil Wayne's No Ceilings Review HERE Lupe Fiasco's Enemy Of The State Review HERE
(Have A Rap Quote Suggestion? An Album Review Request? PM Me.)
We skip the RAW opening video, and Randy Orton’s theme echoes through the arena, as the three members of Legacy slowly make their way to the ring. Orton has the WWE Championship draped over his shoulder.
Cole: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome once again to Monday Night RAW. We are just twenty four hours removed from The Bash, and as you can see, The Viper Randy Orton is still our WWE Champion. Michael Cole here, and King, what do you think about that hellacious Three Stages of Hell match last night?
King: Without a doubt, one of the most intense matches I’ve ever seen. When we think that this rivalary can’t go anywhere else, Triple H and Randy Orton keep upping the physical and emotional ante. And then Orton and his cronies steal one right out from under The Game.
Orton and gang enter the ring. The Legend Killer gets a microphone and gets ready to address the crowd.
Orton: As most of you can plainly see, I am STILL your WWE Champion.
The capacity crowd boos.
Orton: Vince McMahon may have thought that he could stack the odds so greatly against me that I would have to lose my title at The Bash, but as always I proved why I am the absolute best in the business today. Against all odds, Randy Orton survives. Randy Orton remains above all others. You people continue to miss it. Look at me! Look at this title!
The fans look…and boo.
Orton: Look at these two athletes at my side. Over the course of the past couple months the three of us have DOMINATED this entire show! Did Vince McMahon really think that he would ever change any of that? We will STAY on top. THAT is what Legacy is all about. THAT is why I started this group. To assemble and foster a trio of the company’s best talent. We control this show. We will continue to control this show. And if there was ever any doubt…last night I cemented Legacy’s…legacy.
Orton stops and turns to Ted Dibiase.
Orton: But while our dominance is a sure thing, there are some matters which have arisen that should be addressed. Ted. It seems that you may feel slightly negatively about this situation between the three of us. You may feel like you and Cody are my henchmen. That’s not true, Ted. Trust me. I take care of my own. Which is why-
**King of Kings**
The fans erupt! Triple H makes his entrance, hammer in hand. Orton’s eyes go big, as The Game makes a beeline for the ring. Orton rolls out the back, and Hunter slides in. Cody Rhodes tries to stop Triple H, but gets a SLEDGE TO THE FACE! Ted backs up, standing alone in the ring with The Game…the two of them staring each other down. The Game yelling at Dibiase to bring it. Dibiase thinks about it…but just rolls out of the ring instead. Orton is now at the top of the ramp.
Orton: Hunter! Stop! Stop! I know what you’re doing. I mean, after all we’ve been through this time and time again, right? You feel that I screwed you, and you want another match. Am I right?
Triple H yells affirmation up the ramp at Orton.
Orton: Well guess what, Triple H? After years of this rivalry that’s been going on between this, I can finally say this…that’s not going to happen.
The crowd boos heavily.
Orton: You’ve had your chance to beat me in our numerous title matches, and you failed. I’m not going to indulge you with another opportunity. And with RAW in a state of disarray thanks to the whole Donald Trump incident, I’m betting old man Vince doesn’t have time to bother with your problems, so HE’S not going to indulge you either. From what I hear, he’s too busy trying to get RAW back on track again. Am I right? But I’ll tell you what I will do. I won’t give you a rematch. But I’ll give you a chance to earn a rematch, tonight.
The fans cheer for that.
Orton: IF…you’re able to run the gauntlet tonight, against three opponents handpicked by me. If you can do that, I’ll grant you a rematch. But you have to run the gauntlet. What do you say, Hunter?
Triple H has gotten a mic of his own.
HHH: I say, you’re on.
YEAH!
HHH: But Randy. Tell whoever it is that you have for me, that tonight…they play the game.
**Time To Play The Game**
A close up of The Viper’s sinister grin closes us out before we cut to break.
Commercial Break
**I Spit in the Face**
The Colons make their entrance.
Cole: Welcome back, to Monday Night RAW, as we get set for tag team action. The Colons have cashed in their rematch clause against the new Undisputed Tag Champs. In a somewhat controversial decision last night, Smackdown General Manager added the team of Chris Jericho and Edge to the Undisputed Tag Title match. A match which the Smackdown superstars won.
**Metalingus**
Edge makes his entrance with both Tag Belts around his waist, one above another.
King: Have you ever seen a more cocky superstar on the WWE roster, Cole?
Cole: How about Edge’s partner, Chris Jericho, King?
King: I don’t know. If anything, these two would have to come in at a tie.
**Break the Walls Down**
King: Speak of the devil. Why are these two here on RAW, anyway?
Cole: Because King, the Undisputed Champs can appear on any brand at any time!
King: It was a rhetorical question, Cole.
After Jericho’s entrance, all four men get into place. The Colons look pumped and focused, while Team Edge/Jericho looks cool, calm, collected, and cocky. The ref calls for the bell.
Undisputed Tag Team Title Match: The Colons vs. Edge/Chris Jericho
Surprisingly, these two teams are given ample time to work a good match. It is back and forth for the beginning, then Edge and Jericho get the upper hand. They work over Primo for a while. Primo eventually gets a tag in, and Carlito gets a quick advantage, until Jericho suddenly hits a Codebreaker out of nowhere. Edge follows it with a Spear. Academic three.
Winners: Edge/Chris Jericho (Pinfall)
The Colons are clearly crushed. Edge and Jericho make their departure up the ramp, all smiles.
We cut to the back where Orton and Rhodes are talking about something, both clearly frustrated. Rhodes holds an ice pack to his head. Suddenly Dibiase enters, and gets all the attention in the room.
Orton: Where have you been?!
Dibiase: What?
Orton: Never mind. What was that out there?!
Dibiase: What are you talking about?
Orton: I’m talking about Triple H. Cody takes one for the team. Meanwhile, you just roll out of dodge?
Dibiase: You mean like you?
Orton’s face goes beet red.
Orton: Watch it.
Dibiase: It’s like I told you at The Bash. I’m not going to be your henchman anymore. I joined Legacy to better my own career, not yours. Speaking of which. What was it that you were about to say out there, before Triple H came out. I wanna know what you plan on doing for me?
Orton: Are you seriously asking me that, NOW? We have more pressing matters. I need you and Cody to be the first two members of the gauntlet tonight. We need to be focusing on Triple H.
Rhodes: Right. No problem.
Dibiase: Oh yeah, it is a problem. You see Randy, I’m done doing your dirty work. You want Triple H dealt with, you do it yourself. In the meantime, I’ll be waiting for you to remind me why I joined Legacy. Until then, you know how to reach me.
Dibiase then leaves the room. Orton is about to explode.
Rhodes: Don’t worry. I’ll go talk to him.
Orton: You had better talk some sense into him, while you’re at it.
Rhodes leaves Orton alone. The Champ looks none too happy.
Commercial Break
**Reality**
The Miz makes his way to the ring.
Coles: Folks, if you’re just joining us, it appears that there is some dissension in the ranks of Legacy. And what a bad night for it.
King: Well, any night’s a bad night to be having arguments in your own faction. When’s a good night?
Cole: …Well…
The Miz looks more determined than he has ever been. He is dressed in his usual shorts/t-shirt/fedora combo. It’s all business tonight.
Miz: John Cena!
The crowd pops at the mere mention of the name.
Miz: Last night you and I both know that you stole one from me at The Bash. Which makes it what? Like five and one, now? Why don’t you bring yourself out here for one more wrestling clinic against The Miz? And this time how bout you fight clean?
King: What is he talking about? John Cena beat him fair and square at The Bash.
**The Time is Now**
John Cena comes flying out the gate, getting a hailstorm of cheers and boos. He only poses for a few moments before getting into it.
Cena: Miz, when you first showed up here on RAW, I said I admired your gusto. Going after the biggest dog in the yard to prove your worth…I got that. But I beat you at The Bash. Not only that, I beat you decisively. But you can believe whatever you want in your own warped mind. I don’t know if it’s that your bedazzled fedora is own too tight…or maybe that purple hair dye seeped into your brain, the fact of the matter is John Cena is more than willing to oblige someone wanting a fight. So if you wanna’ go another round…
Cena doesn’t finish his statement, he just tosses the mic aside. As he makes his way to the ring, he removes his hat and shirt. He slides into the ring and calls for the bell.
King: I can’t believe it! We’re getting a rematch from The Bash, right here, right now!
Singles Match: John Cena vs. The Miz
This match is very similar to their Bash encounter. Cena gets in most of the offense, then goes for a win with the STF after about ten minutes or so. However, this time…Cena is KICKED IN THE HEAD…by THE BRIAN KENDRICK!
Winner: John Cena (DQ)
The Brian Kendrick works Cena over with stomps, while The Miz gets to his feet. He quickly joins in. But Cena starts rallying back. Standing and striking down both of his attackers until…he’s attacked from behind by JAMIE NOBLE?! Now it’s a three on one beat down!
Cole: This is brutal! What do these three have against John Cena?!
But then, Cena starts fighting back AGAIN! He climbs to his feet…but then Noble jumps on Cena…locking on The Dragon Sleeper! Cena falls to the ground then begins to yell in pain for a while. Then Noble and The Miz lift up John Cena in position for Kendrick…who grabs the neck…and delivers The Kendrick! Now Kendrick and Noble lift Cena for The Miz, and he is already looking devastated,…but Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale! The three men stand over Cena’s dormant body, raising their hands in victory.
King: What on earth have we just witnessed?
We cut to a back hallway, where Mickie James is making her way to ringside.
Cole: Well, despite the vicious attack by these three young athletes on John Cena, we are scheduled for diva action next.
Cut to Maryse making her way to the ring in another hallway.
Cole: The show continues. Maryse versus Mickie James for the Diva’s Championship. That’s up next.
Commercial Break
**James’ Theme**
Mickie James makes her entrance, getting cat calls and whistles.
**Pourquoi**
Maryse makes her entrance, looking confident.
Diva’s Championship Match: Mickie James vs. Maryse
This match is as good as it can be for these two divas. They go about ten minutes with little reaction from the fans. James has the advantage near the end. She goes for the Mickie-D-T, but Maryse shoves her away, then leaves the ring. She grabs her belt and begins to leave the arena…as she’s counted out.
Winner: Mickie James (Countout)
James looks on, in shock and frustration.
King: C’mon. That’s no way to end a match. What a disappointment.
Cole: Well, I guess the rumor continues, King. Maryse is afraid to face Mickie James.
King: I think she was afraid to lose to Mickie James. Which is what would of happened if Mickie hit that Mickie-D-T.
We cut to the back, where we see a limo pull into the arena. Out steps…Vince McMahon! Vince sniffs in the arena air, buttons his coat, then makes his way into the building, the fans reacting in the background.
Cole: It’s the Chairman! What will he have to say to the WWE Universe?
King: I don’t know, Cole. But whenever the Chairman talks, it’s usually important.
Commercial Break
Castrol GTX presents…The Slam of the Night: A small recap of how Donald Trump screwed Vince over.
Cole: Last week Vince McMahon bought RAW back from Donald Trump for twice what Trump paid for it. It was indeed…the art of the deal.
King: It was incredible. I’ve never seen anyone pull a fast one on Mr. McMahon like Trump did. But tonight, Mr. McMahon claims to have a plan to fix things.
**No Chance in Hell**
Vince walks to the ring like only he can. He gets in the ring, and his music is cut.
Vince: Last week, instead of what was supposed to happen, what happened was Vince McMahon got screwed.
A light array of cheers.
Vince: You see, I went against my better judgment. Instead of signing a new General Manager to RAW, I was enticed by the idea of RAW being under new ownership. I thought it would bring a fresh feel to RAW. Instead, Donald Trump pulled the wool over my eyes, and he screwed Vincent Kennedy McMahon-not only that-he screwed the entire WWE!
A light mixed reaction.
Vince: So over the course of the past week, I’ve been trying to get RAW back on track. How would I do it? How could I get RAW back in line? Well I’ve decided that my initial idea was the right one. RAW will have a new General Manager.
A slightly louder reaction.
Vince: But I’m not going to crown a new GM on a whim like how I sold RAW. No, no. You see over the next three weeks, three different candidates will audition for the part of GM by being GM for a night. Then the Monday after Night of Champions, I will name the new GM based on their performances. These three men are here tonight, so now, allow me to introduce the candidates. First, next week, RAW will be under the guidance of this man…Jonathan Coachman!
The crowd gives a medium, mixed reaction.
**Hard Hittin**
The Coach makes his entrance, looking absolutely ecstatic to be back on RAW. He smiles and waves as he makes his way to the ring. Then once he gets in the ring, he starts shuffling around, in what appears to be almost a dance. Mr. McMahon isn’t amused.
Vince: What…what in the hell…are you doing? Is that a dance-are you dancing?
Coach: I’m sorry, Mr.McMahon. I’m just absolutely pumped, to get the chance to become RAW General Manager. I know I can deliver next week. I’ve been waiting for this chance for a very long time. Frankly, when I left the WWE, I thought the dream was over. I had given up on the idea of joining WWE upper management. And then I got the call. I gotta tell you, I almost jumped out of my skin! Mr. McMahon, I am ecstatic that you’re giving me this chance, and I can guarantee that you won’t regret it.
Vince: I hope so. You see Coach, I chose to give you this chance because you served so diligently under me as RAW Executive Assistant, some time back. I saw potential in you then. When I started to think of candidates, you were one of the first to come to my mind.
Coach: Thank you, sir.
Vince: But you weren’t the only one. In order to become GM, you’ll have to out perform this next man. He will be interim GM two weeks from now…ladies and gentlemen…welcome back, Eric Bischoff!
**I’m Back**
The crowd pops loudly. Bischoff makes his entrance, super cool, with that trademark Bischoff smile. He gets in the ring and shakes Vince’s hand.
Bischoff: Mr. McMahon. I must say, of all the people to get a phone call from, I never expected to hear from you.
Vince: Well Eric. The fact is…quite frankly, I despise you.
A large reaction.
Vince: But you did guide RAW through several years of successful business for this company. I decided that perhaps enough time had passed since I fired you, that it was time to give you another shot.
Bischoff: Absolutely, the right choice, Mr. McMahon. And when I’m done with my night as interim GM, you’ll see that I’m the right choice for RAW’s new General Manager.
Vince: Perhaps, but there is still one more candidate for the position. The man who will get his shot three weeks from now…my son, Shane McMahon!
**Here Comes the Money**
Bischoff’s face drops. The crowd gives a smaller reaction than Eric’s, but Shane comes out prancing around much more than either prior man did. He makes his way to the ring, gets in, and embraces his father.
Shane: Dad, I’ll keep it brief. You and I both know, when it comes to this job, no one is better suited…than a McMahon. Nothing more need be said.
Vince: Well put. But I know you are all capable. This decision will come down to your performances over the next few weeks. And when I announce the new GM, you can bet that it will be after much deliberation. You three better deliver. I’ll see you after Night of Champions.
**No Chance in Hell**
Vince exits the ring, as the three GM candidates stare each other down.
Commercial Break
We come back to a hallway, where it appears Maryse is on her way home. But she is cut off by The Miz. The fans boo off-screen as The Miz steps in front of the Divas Champion.
Miz: Well. You said to make an impact on Cena. And if that wasn’t an impact I don’t know what is.
Maryse smiles, despite herself. She briefly says something
in French, then in English.
Maryse: Yes. I have to admit…that was impressive.
Miz: No…it was awesome.
Maryse: Perhaps.
Miz: So…what do you say, next week you accompany me to RAW? You know…we hang out together all night…get to know each other.
Maryse thinks for a few seconds.
Maryse: …ok.
She grabs Miz’s hand, then pulls a pen from her pocket and writes her number down.
Maryse: Give me a call.
Maryse then leaves an absolutely ecstatic Miz. Suddenly, Kendrick and Noble appear behind him. Miz turns to face them.
Miz: Next week is going to be good…let’s go.
The trio walks out of frame together. We cut to ringside.
Cole: Well, King, there you see The Miz once again, after the heinous three on one attack from earlier tonight.
King: I still don’t understand what that was about.
Cole: Well, hopefully things will come together next week. The Miz was requested airtime on next week’s show. Maybe we’ll get some answers.
**Oh Yeah!!!**
Matt Hardy makes his entrance to the ring, sans cast, in his coat and tights, and somber. He gets in the ring, where Goldust is already waiting.
Singles Match: Matt Hardy vs. Goldust
This is a Hardy showcase, through and through. He beats on Goldust for five plus minutes, hitting all his signature moves. Dust tries to hit his spinning neckbreaker finisher, but Hardy reverses it into the Twist of Fate for the win.
Winner: Matt Hardy (Pinfall)
Hardy celebrates by mean mugging his fallen opponent, then raising a single fist.
Commercial Break
The VIP Lounge is set up in the ring.
**I’m Comin’**
MVP makes his entrance, dressed casually. He walks past the VIP Lounge bodyguard, giving dap, then gets in the ring, mic in hand.
MVP: Yo, cut my music. Ya’ll know what time it is. Big things poppin’-
“Little things droppin’!”
MVP: Lil things droppin’! That’s right. It’s time once again for another edition of the VIP Lounge. Now, most of you know that recently I lost my United States Championship to Kofi Kingston.
Pop.
MVP: Kofi is a great talent here on RAW. Which is why tonight he is my guest on the VIP Lounge. So ladies and gentlemen, without further adieu…your United States Champion…Kofi Kingston!
**S.O.S.**
The US Champion makes his entrance to a fair ovation. He makes his way to the ring in an open dress shirt and jeans, gets in the ring, and shakes MVP’s hand. MVP hands Kofi another mic, then both men sit down.
MVP: Kofi, first off, let me congratulate you on your title win. But moving on, I think the thought on everyone’s mind tonight…when will we see MVP/Kofi Kingston for that US Title again?
The capacity crowd pops once again. Kofi smiles, opens his mouth, but before he can answer-
**Oooh, Chavo**
Chavo comes out, poncho and all, interrupting the VIP Lounge to a plethora of boos. He looks pretty pissed, but not as much as MVP does now. Chavo pushes past MVP’s guard, and climbs in the ring.
MVP: What do you think-
Chavo: I’m doing? What do I think I’m doing? What do you think YOU’RE doing? Last time I checked you lost that United States Title, MVP. And also, the last time I checked, you lost your rematch for that United States Title, MVP. So in my humble opinion, it’s time for you to step aside, and give a REAL contender a shot at that title. So what do you say, Kofi?
As Chavo turns to Kofi, the crowd boos. Kofi shrugs, then lifts the mic to speak, but-
MVP: Hold up, playboy. A REAL contender? And just what makes you a REAL contender? The fact that you were Vickie Guerrero’s whipping boy for the past two years?
Pop.
MVP: Well look around, Chavito. Vickie ain’t around no mo’. So she won’t be throwing you any more bones. Which means, you want a title shot? Well the line starts after RAW’s M…V…P.
Another pop.
Chavo: That’s another thing. You call yourself the MVP? If by MVP, you mean Most Valuable Punk…then I guess you’re right.
Boo!
Chavo: RAW’s true MVP…is right here!
MVP: You think you’re better than me?
Chavo: I know I’m better than you! I can beat you anywhere, anytime.
MVP: Well, why don’t you put your money where your mouth is? Chavo Guerrero versus The Franchise Playa’, MVP. Right here next week?
Chavo: That’s fine with me.
Pop.
MVP: Good. Next week I’ll prove you’re not better than me…I…am better…than you!
MVP tosses his mic aside and throws up the 305. His music cuts back in, as Kingston just stands there, not being able to have said a word.
Cole: Wow. It will be MVP versus Chavo next week, but up next-
We cut to Triple H, in the back, on his way to the ring.
Cole: Triple H runs the gauntlet. It is our main event!
Commercial Break
**Time To Play The Game**
Cole: It’s main event time! Can The Game win this match, and get another shot at Randy Orton?
King: I think that Triple H is capable of all kinds of things with the intense hatred he has flowing through his veins for Randy Orton.
Triple H makes his way to the ring, in vintage fashion.
Gauntlet Match: Triple H vs. ???,???,& ???
Triple H stands anxiously in the ring, waiting for his first opponent.
**Out To Kill**
Cody Rhodes makes his way to the ring, HHH’s first opponent. Hunter seems unfazed. They start things off immediately. Triple H works very aggressively, pushing Rhodes to the limit. But surprisingly, Rhodes keeps The King of Kings at bay. The two men work a good, technical, fifteen minute match. Hunter finishes with a round of his signature moves and the Pedigree.
First Fall: Triple H (Pinfall)
He gets up, still full of energy. He waits for his opponent.
**Biscuits & Gravy**
HHH breathes heavily as Festus is led to the ring by The Viper himself. The Game seems a little fazed, if just for a moment, before we go to break.
Commercial Break
When we come back, Festus walks the steps by himself, gets in the ring…and comes to life by the bell! He immediately charges The Game…who reverses the momentum into a spinebuster! This match is much harder for Hunter. He gets beat down pretty badly. It seems that The Game is pushed to the absolute brink after five minutes of torture…until he reverses a chokeslam attempt into a Pedigree out of nowhere! He makes the pin.
Second Fall: Triple H (Pinfall)
Hunter uses the ropes to pull himself to his feet. His breathing is labored. He looks up the ramp at Randy Orton, who smiles at a battered Triple H and mouths “one more, Hunter.” Orton slowly turns to look up the ramp when-
**Well…It’s The BIG SHOW!!!**
Triple H’s eyes close, and he drops his head, as the World’s Largest Athlete makes his way to the ring. The Game looks devastated, put quickly tries to prepare himself.
Cole: Oh no! It can’t be! After two hard fought victories for The Game, he has to now go one on one with a fresh Big Show!
Big Show climbs between the ropes. Triple H rushes forward to try to get the drop on Show, but is shoved across the ring by Big Show. Big Show stands straight up, and Triple H tries to run forward again, but Show grabs the throat! Hunter kicks low, causing Show to fold over…and The Game tries for the Pedigree! But Show stands up, back body dropping Triple H. Triple stands and turns…into a hard right Knockout Blow!!! Show covers…1…2…3!!!
Third Fall: Big Show (Pinfall)
The fans seem to sigh collectively. The ref tries to raise Show’s hand…but The World’s Largest Athlete isn’t done. He lifts Triple H to his feet, by the hair…cocking back…and delivering a second Blow!!! The fans boo the actions of Show, who just smiles. As Hunter lies prone on the mat, Show lifts his unconscious head from the mat…and delivers yet another Blow into the back of The Game’s head! Show laughs and brushes his goatee.
Cole: No! This isn’t right! The Big Show is absolutely heartless!
King: My God, Michael Cole. The Big Show has brutalized Triple H.
We cut to Randy Orton, who smiles his crazy smile. Finally we cut to Triple H’s unconscious body as we go off air to silence.
End Show
__________________
TPS Rap Quote
If you ain’t Million Dollar Dreamin’ then we op-pee-sites, in high school I was voted the most Ted DiBiase’st. Also the most slept on, cause my Ted DiBiaseness, an Inglorious Bastard, and you looking like a Nazi bitch. Lupe Fiasco/The One/Enemy Of The State
The Phenomenon Strikes: In Serious Question
TPS Is Writing Album Reviews. Lil Wayne's No Ceilings Review HERE Lupe Fiasco's Enemy Of The State Review HERE
(Have A Rap Quote Suggestion? An Album Review Request? PM Me.)
Last edited by theplasmasnake : 08-24-2009 at 02:47 PM.
>> I LOVED the opening promo, it was super realistic from what was coming out of the mouths of Orton, Cole, and King. Some grammar issues none the less great opening promo.
>> Opening match was alright. A bit more action would have made it better.
>> Legacy Segment, looks good, nice to see that DiBiase is starting to lean towards splitting with Orton. Something I have done already in my BTB nice to see that, as I see more potential in DiBiase without Orton.
>> Cena vs Miz, alright so Cena was the ref, apparently because you wrote he came in and asked to ring the bell? Huh?, anyways squash match for Cena, until TBK ? WOW what a suprise but TBK on Cena Really?!? Hmm Im going to have to think about that one.
>> Noble, TBK, Miz I have no clue what on earth TBK and Noble are doing interfering in Cena’s business Im going to have to see in the next Raw to see what unfolds between this.
>> Diva’s , I dont care about them, never did never will.
>> Vince Segment, Alright first the coach was a suprise, next Eric effin Bischoff even more of a suprise, I am liking this man, Bischoff knows how to succed! Nice to see that their are three candidates and they get the opportunity to deleiver, we will see who the GM will be after NOC. Nice segment.
>> Miz Maryse segment, filler segment I guess, but still that stable is questioning me like hell.
>> Matt squashes Goldust, I hope he is going to get a push despite being on Raw, we will see where you go with this.
>> MVP lounge, nice lounge session I liked it nice to see Chavo is not going to job in your BTB , you really are amazing at writing how the superstars should talk.
>> Gauntlet, nice way to start the match off with a legacy member, though it would have been even more exciting to see a legacy member end it as in being the 3rd guy. Obviously Cody would lose. HAHAHA its Festus LOL he is a joke my friend, I hate him! Lol. Obviously Trips would kill him.
WAIT JUST A SECOND ITS THE BIG SHOW!! Now he even beat Triple H what in the hell, what a suprising ending, who is the next contender going to be HMM ?? Im going to have to wait and see, possibly HBK?? Oh who knows.
>> Overall 6.5/10 show. Now calm down it was a really good show, you just need to put in some more action and detail into your matches, your good at the suprising stuff like the Miz stable. Even more the Big show winning. Some grammar issues could be fixed though. GREAT writing for the superstars though. I’ll continue to read this, nice show.
Very, Very, Very nice opening promo Randy Orton very realalistic promo I defanately see it happening in real life. Triple H attacks Orton, shocker lol. I really wish this fued would just end or add something new to it, please don't just give me Orton vs. HHH again at NOC.
Tag Titles match it really recapped which I don't like I want at least a little more then just if it was good and how it ended. But Edge and Jericho retain, yeah it was a squash just to get the fact the Colons have a re-match cluase done with.
Legacy promo, ok I thing I did something very similiar to this in my thread on first Raw lol. I don't think they will break up just yet and they shouldn't I think a face turn of someone like DiBiase needs to happen slowly and well thought out. Wish I think this will be, but you can't just drop out there IMO.
Miz promo, I believe it's seven and one lol. Cena expects the match, why wouldn't he he's superman. Kendrick and Noble attack Cena, damn!!! I do have a problem with this, I don't mind the young heels teaming up against John Cena, but it could've waited, the next PPV is all Title matches, if Cena busy dealing with these three how he's going to be on this PPV? I wouldn't have minded a triple threat or a fatal four way for the WWE Title with HHH, Orton, Cena, and Show.
Diva's Title match ok, I believe that makes perfect sense they will have a re-match at NOC, yeah I hope Mickie goes over because she can acutally wrestle. My only minor bitch about this is WWE did the exact same thing when Kelly was top contender and I think it may be a little to soon for Maryse to do the exact same thing again
Nice Vince promo, I really liked it then the three GMs candidates, I like Bischoff and Shane as my only promblem with them is the fact they are incredibly common choices as Raw GM in modern day BTBs but oh well. I'd like to see one of them be GM, I'm going to Bischoff will because I already have Shane as GM in my thread lol.
Miz and Maryse nice little promo they would make a nice couple, but I think Miz could've done a little more to earn a spot in her pants, I mean heart lol. I think you should've stuck with "You don't talk to me until you beat John Cena"
The Lounge nice promo, at least Chavo isn't doing that Hornswoggle shit, I don't think he needs the title but I do think he needs a few creditabil wins. I bet it'll be Kofi vs. MVP vs. Chavo at NOC.
Cody Rhodes, gets jobb to Triple H good job, he deserves Cody Rhodes is nothing and will never be more ever. Fuestes, this was a WTF moment for me? Ok Fuetes is a face and not creditabil one if Feutes was heel I'd have been ok but I just don't that the Fuetues part other than to wear down Triple H. Then Big Show beats him, I still think Triple H will be in the WWE Title match in like a fatal four way match with Orton, Show, Triple H, and HBK. Otherwise you don't have your two biggest faces on the PPV which wouldn't sell to anyone lol.
Overall I give the show a 6/10: The promos really saved it, the opening one, the lounge, and the Vince one were all great. I think you do need to write out your matches more, I can't really judge any of them because nothing really happened they way you wrote it. But if you improve that and a little better match booking leading towards the PPV could've made it better.
Not Removing until (Started 5/26/10)
[] Edge becomes a Ten Time World Champion
[] Christian is in a World Title Match
[] The Miz main events Raw, Smackdown or a Pay-Per-View and wins
[/] Abyss Cleanly loses a match (Jeff Hardy, Impact 7/1/10)
[/] Daniel Bryan (or Brian Danielson) kicks someone's head in or makes them tap out (John Cena, Raw 6/7/10)
[] Zack Ryder wins a match on Raw
[] The Dudebusters cleanly win a tag match on Smackdown
What’s up, partner? It’s time for feedback…feedback for your first RAW! Here goes:
First thing you got to know if that I usually leave feedback once I read a bit of your show, write my thoughts, and continue reading, etc.
Opening: Boring, boring, and boring. Not what you wrote, just the general concept of it. You can’t be blamed though because realistically, it’s not your fault, this is what you have to work with. I’m hoping you start drifting away from what the product is, by simply having Hunter lose the gauntlet, but that probably won’t happen. I thought that Orton was in character, but at the same time, he was like all bad guys. Orton has a different kind of heel to his character. It’s very hard to write with characters, but at the same time, you’re just starting out. Also, just when the conversation got interesting between Orton and Ted, Hunter came out. Thought it wasn’t the right time for him to come out and interrupt Orton, but I’m sensing the direction you’re going with this. The ultimate, Ted screws Orton/attacks him after the match…and then Ted turns face … eventually taking the title off of Orton. You’re simply foreshadowing this, as I like it. I thought HHH didn’t speak enough, so this brought down the realism of this promo. I thought that it was dumb for Orton to deny HHH his right to a match but allowed him a match in order to get the right to a title match. Thought it would be something that an authority figure would do. Someone whose last name wasn’t McMahon. This is my opinion on the entire opening segment. As people say, people tend to leave reviews of the show, which just summarizes your show and leaves a sentence or two on it. I absolutely hate it when people do that, so I try my best to not do that.
Tag Team Match: Before I get into the match, I wanted to tell you that for a strange reason, I felt like I was reading the report of what happened on an actual episode of RAW. Not because this is copywork, but because I need to find out what actually happened on this week’s RAW, and this seemed so WWE-like that I thought I was reading the actual thing (don’t worry, I meant it as a compliment) I see this is how you’re going to be writing matches, not so bad…maybe a tad bit longer, but it’s fine with the way it is. I’m sure for ppv’s we’re going to be writing our matches in full, as I think we should do it just for pay per views, but it’s going to be hard once we finish Summerslam, as the ppv’s become single branded ppv’s. Nothing I can really say here…I like how you wrote the match, giving your own tell of the match, not just moves for moves, but you tell the story like it is a story. Obviously Team Ego went over, and glad Carlito didn’t turn on his brother.
Legacy promo: Oh snap, seems like I was right….but it happened like a month too early, haha. Seriously, though, it’s good that you brought up what happened before HHH interrupted. Ted being sick and tired of Orton’s shit is good, and you wrote Orton well here. Ted, on the other hand, hasn’t really been shown to us as a face…so this is the very beginning of you creating a character for the man who is known just as Million Dollar Man’s son/Orton’s henchman. This is the beginning for you to create Ted Dibiase Jr. – The character! Make us proud, man.
The whole Miz/Cena fiasco: The effort was good, but it came out all wrong, but it still was pretty good. Let me explain: You had Miz coming out, and the stuff he said was good. I liked how he said that Cena won but not cleanly. What I would’ve liked is some Cena and Miz banter, some back and forth. Instead of an actual one on one match, have Cena and Miz fight. Meaning a face off, a match but no match. Since you went through with the match, you had Cena lose by DQ, which was a good way. I would’ve liked Kendrick to come in an attack Cena like he did. Then have Miz and Kendrick double team Cena, with Cena coming back, like the superman that he is, but then have Jamie Noble come out, with a weapon. You had Cena come back after a 3 on 1 assault, but then Noble, who is half the size of Cena (maybe more) just jump on Cena’s back, locking in some sleeper hold, I don’t buy it. Cena has beat Big Show, Khali, Taker, HHH, Angle, Jericho, Orton, Edge, HBK, and more…and you’re telling me that he can’t fight off Jamie Noble? Your effort was good, your idea is original, new, and fresh…but you must work on the way you deliver these things. Having a 3 on 1 attack on the same time, by kicking him down, followed by a couple of chair shots is the ultimate key on getting an opponent down and out. Then and only then do you have them add insult to injury by having them inflict their finishing moves. I didn’t like how you just had them attack him, without no explanation, without having Miz grab a microphone and explain what we just saw…why we just saw it. I’m sure this is going to be a stable or faction (same thing, but two different words) but this group of young athletes has to make sense…and it’s now up to you, to make it have some sense.
Diva’s Title match: *sigh* … 10 minutes? No way would RAW have a 10 minute DIVA match, nowadays. Maybe that statement is wrong, I read the results of RAW on a weekly basis, but I don’t watch it on a weekly basis. But I’m more than sure that diva’s don’t have 10 minute matches. I have so much to say, but ugh I just can’t make it all out in just a couple of words. I don’t understand, man, how in the world King could say that Maryse is scared of Mickie after wrestling her for…10 minutes!! Jesus, man, maybe walking out of the match after 2 or 3 minutes is understandable. I think you wrote this match, if you can even call it that, so you can get it out of the way. You’re not really interested in the Diva’s division, which is a shame. It’s boring on TV, yes, but in the world of BTB it’s anything but. You control it! You have the power to make it un-boring. You just choose not to, which is a shame. This was a very lackluster piece of writing, that you have just written, and I hope you change that. I take back what I said before on that I like your writing of the matches, because unless things change…this piece of writing for the match was a disgrace. This isn’t bashing, this is just feedback. I won’t praise your show because it won’t help you. I’m looking for ways to help you, just like I’m sure you’ll help me. You can only get better from here, man!
Vince McMahon: Nice to see the boss, here. I figured he’d be out here, and I’m surprised that he didn’t open the show, or close the show, but the timing of his appearance on RAW, doesn’t matter to me, to be honest. It doesn’t change the mood of the segment, nor does it change how I feel about it. I won’t lie to you…the idea of having 3 different GM’s in the next three weeks, followed by the choice on the RAW after NOC bring a very new and FRESH feel to RAW. What I didn’t like though, is again the lack of realism. Only one man can be GM. It’s either Shane, Coach, or Eric. It’s very unrealistic to have these men out here, and let me explain why. Only one man can become GM. When that man is announced, what happens to the other two men? If Shane is chosen, will Eric or Coach just leave? Coach is working with ESPN, if Coach is here on RAW, vying for this “position” then he must’ve left ESPN. What about Eric? If Coach is chosen, what about Eric? Eric, I think, has some beef with Vince. Eric wouldn’t come back to the WWE for a month and that’s it. Very unrealistic. My personal choice would be Bicshoff. I’m going to say that while Shane is the obvious candidate, I’m going to have to say that Vince will pull a massive heel turn and name Eric the GM. Why would he be here in the WWE if it’s just a temporary basis. Plus, I won’t lie, besides for Coach…I didn’t find anyone in character. Vince should’ve been more Vince. But…it’s normal for the writer to have a hard time to get into character in the very beginning.
Miz/Maryse: Maryse joining Miz was very good, as I see her being the manager/valet of the team. She said yes too quickly, haha, nah I’m kidding.
Hardy vs. Dust: Damn, damn shame that you squashed Dust. Turn this man into something big, playa, come on! I won’t comment on the match, because I’ll just be repeating myself. Good to see Hardy be put over here, as you can build this man into a future heavyweight champion.
VIP Lounge: Hmm, I thought this was great. MVP was in character, Chavo’s getting a push…GOOD…have this man win! Don’t job him out next week. Have Chavo beat MVP…believe it or not…you can push BOTH these guys, you just got to come up with it yourself. The only thing bothering me is how Kofi didn’t get to say a word. I’m trying to think of a way to get Kofi to be apart of this show, but nothing’s coming to me. I’ll let it slide…this time, haha.
Side note: Thought the commentating was great all night, just wished they showed HHH before his match.
Gauntlet Match:
Rhodes: Having him be the first opponent was obvious, I’m very surprised that you didn’t have Rhodes go and find Ted, to see what was wrong. Maybe you forgot to include that in the show, but I thought since you had Cody leave the room after him, that maybe you would show the segment, but you didn’t. 15 minute match? Now you’re just being fucking ridiculous, man. I don’t want to say anything else about this, because it won’t be good.
Festus: You had a good guy be Orton’s second choice? I know this guy is retarded and all, sorry if it offends anyone, but I guess it fits, cause Festus doesn’t understand anything until the bell rings. Also, having HHH beat him after 5 minutes…but having him face Rhodes for 15, is just bizarre. I thought this man was the wrong choice, definitely thought all the opponents should be just heels.
Big Show: Great to have him be one of the opponents. Even better to have him beat HHH, I have a lot to say but I’ll save it.
I think I’ll save it…for now, haha. In my opinion, I would have had HHH beta Rhodes in a good SIX minute bout. Have HHH beat Big Show in the second gauntlet match by count out, or something in the 5 minute fall, and have Ted be the 3rd man, and have HIM defeat HHH. Having Show beat HHH does nothing for him because Show is already known. Having Ted beat a tired HHH would be realistic, smart, and could continue whatever storyline you would go through with Legacy. The lack of Ted after the confrontation was not smart of you, as you can’t just have something like that without anything else. Just my opinion, I think you missed the bullet with that one. The idea of the gauntlet match was great, but the fact that Orton made it, stunk. I don’t know, just my opinion. You could have made many better decisions, but you didn’t. I thought that even though you didn’t make some right decisions, it was a still good and overall well written show. You need, and must, work on your recapped matches. You want to recap them? Fine but recap them well! You must work on your promos. You want to write excellent promos? Fine but write them well! Get into the right characters…write them out the exact same way you’d hear it. Sound it out first, out loud to make sure it sounds right. Then, in your head, picture the guy saying it. You also need to make realistic decisions. A 10 minute divas match? A 15 minute opening gauntlet match? With Cody Rhodes? No. Come on, man, you must make normal decisions.
Overall I thought that this show was a great show. The first shows are always the toughest. I know that I would have watched this episode of RAW, if it were on actual TV. Just because some of your decisions were bad, doesn’t mean that this show was bad. I liked this show very much, and I would be lying if I told you that I didn’t want the second show to be posted already. That’s how good I thought it was. It was good enough to be excited for the second show. Don’t take my opinions and feedbacks as insults and bashing, take them for what they are: constructive criticism…just there to get you to get better! Hope you enjoyed this feedback, keep doing yo thing!
Overall, I thought the show was solid. Orton has a different heelish character to him, I would have liked to have seen that more into character. I like how your teetering on the verge of making DiBiase Jr. a face, But Orton in the segment wasn't in character enough. He's the monotone viper. Your making this based on the current product, but getting the Coach and Bischoff thing was nice. I would have liked to have seen an Orton hitting an RKO or DiBiase Jr. taking out The Game after a punch, maybe showing Orton he can out do it, eventually setting up a full face turn if that's what your planning on.
We knew Jericho and Edge were going to win this match, seems oddly similar to the RAW after The Bash if I recall correctly. I would have liked to have seen that match longer, but having Jericho hit the Code Breaker followed up by an Edge spear was great. I wish you kept Carlito strong and have had Primo got the loss. Keeping the possibility of him turning on his brother.
The Cena beat down.. It was alright, nothing special but Jamie Noble? Unless you push him correctly he is dead weight. In my opinion. ECW is where he should be. But if you can book him correctly then I'd like to see it.
Back to the Gauntlet Match. Rhodes losing, as to be expected... I would have liked to see him do better, but like the last post 15 mins? And a RAW Diva 10 min match? Come on dude, NOT HAPPENING! This show would have ran over till 11 30. Even 12. Still first show, working out the knicks.
FESTUS? Are you kidding me?? Go with a tease, a second or third generation superstar! Tease someone joining Legacy dude, that's what's so great about having that. You can tease a Ted replacement in case he turns.
The Big Show was booked nicely. He once beat HHH in a last man standing match on Smackdown, so you could have The Big Show make the case to fight for The WWE Championship match. Big Show could say that's twice in a row (If it is? May have lost once in the middle in singles, not sure). You could be setting up a DX back, but will see.
I liked the show and will tuning into the next. 6.5/10 Thats actually a good rating in my opinion for a first show! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!
__________________ Rhodes Presents: - The Future Has Arrived - A Dolph Ziggler Diary
Okay, I've read all of the reviews and I appreciate the feedback. And trust me, I'm taking it all to heart. I thought I'd pop in here to explain my mindset on some of the things in my first RAW in this thread.
Ted DiBiase's Status The WWE has been hinting at a Ted split from Legacy forever. I didn't want to keep on that path. Instead I'm jumping right into a side program for Randy Orton to contend wth, along with the main event scene. Expect this development to go to new places.
The Miz's Assist A lot of confusion and shock has been expressed over The Miz, Jamie Noble, and Brian Kendrick. What do they have in common? Why is Noble involved? Why is Cena in this program now? I assure you that this story will unfold in a manner that answers all your questions. It starts next week with The Miz's requested airtime. Also, the sleeper Noble used is his finisher. The Dragon Sleeper. You'll see why I'm pushing Noble soon enough.
The Match Lengths I am a fan of long matches as you can see. I think that RAW doesn't allow for nearly enough time for their matches to play out. I wanted these matches to be the center of the show. Events in and of themselves. But I've heard your cries of foul...and I can assure you that my future shows will address your concerns.
The Match Recaps Another complaint is the recap form in which I present my matches. You've asked why there isn't more action. Well...next RAW there will be. You can expect matches to be more action packed from here on out.
Festus I'm not a fan of Festus. Apparently you guys aren't either. I justed wanted a big guy to beat on Hunter for a while after he controlled most of the Cody falls. And even though he's a face...I felt his mental state would allow for him to be manipulated by Orton. You won't see much more of Festus.
The GM Situation Just thought I'd explain my thoughts on this, as it is another thing getting a lot of reactions. I'm not ready to reveal my pic, but I'll just say that if Coach ISN'T picked then you'll know he was used in just a guest role like the guest GMs nowadays. The same for Bischoff. And Shane is obvious. Whoever the GM is...I already have BIG plans for them. They won't just be a figure head.
All in all, I'm happy with the response. The first show is indeed the hardest. I'm trying to stay true to the timeline, while also steering the show in MY direction. Expect things to get better with every show!
__________________
TPS Rap Quote
If you ain’t Million Dollar Dreamin’ then we op-pee-sites, in high school I was voted the most Ted DiBiase’st. Also the most slept on, cause my Ted DiBiaseness, an Inglorious Bastard, and you looking like a Nazi bitch. Lupe Fiasco/The One/Enemy Of The State
The Phenomenon Strikes: In Serious Question
TPS Is Writing Album Reviews. Lil Wayne's No Ceilings Review HERE Lupe Fiasco's Enemy Of The State Review HERE
(Have A Rap Quote Suggestion? An Album Review Request? PM Me.)
The Phenomenon Strikes: A WWE BTB
Re: The Phenomenon Strikes: A WWE BTB
