ECW Hardcore TV
January 16, 2001
The Brook Park Armory in Brook Park, Ohio
ECW Hardcore TV begins, and the show opens cold, without the usual opening video. We are outside The Brook Park Armory where the show is being held, and standing in front of the camera is the one, the only, “The Whole Fuckin’ Show” Rob Van Dam! Standing right next to him is his friend and manager, Bill Alfonso, with his trusty whistle in his fingers. Alfonso goes right up to the camera and blows the whistle hard, before taking a step back and blowing it again.
“JERRY LYNN, ME AND RVD SAW WHAT CHU’ SAID LAST WEEK! YOU WANT TO FACE RVD AGAIN?! YOU WANT TO LOSE AGAIN!? WELL LYNN YOU CAN’T HANDLE ROB VAN DAM! YOU AIN’T NEVER BEATEN HIM AND YOU AIN’T EVER GONNA BEAT HIM!”
By the time he’s done talking, Bill’s face is red and he blows the whistle once more for good measure. Van Dam laughs at his friends enthusiasm and then pats him in the back, before grinning at the camera.
Rob Van Dam:
“Jerry, dude, come on man. You really want to do this again bro? I mean, it’s just going to be the same old song and dance. You challenge me; you get really obsessed over beating me….and then you DON’T. We’ve wrestled over, and over, and over, and over…and you’ve never won man. But you know what? I’ll humor you. You’ve got one last chance bro, one last chance. Living Dangerously 01’, Jerry Lynn versus Rob Van Dam. But don’t get your hopes up to high man, ‘cause when we meet in that ring for the hundredth time, I’m just gonna’ kick your teeth out- Err, sorry Fonzie.”
He shoots Alfonso a sheepish smile, as “The Manager of Champions” was obviously offended by the teeth comment.
Rob Van Dam:
“So, uh, where was I? Oh yeah, I’m gonna’ knock your brains out, and I’m going to beat you. Because Jerry, between the two of us, there just isn’t any comparison. And at the end of our match, it’s not going to be you who wins, it’s going to be me. Rob…Van…Dam.”
He points to himself while saying his name, and steps back. Bill Alfonso steps up and puts his face right up to the camera before blowing his whistle AGAIN, cueing the end of the promo. Screen begins to fade out…
Into the ECW opening video, set to the sounds of “This is Extreme” by Harry Slash and the Slashtones! As the song gets heavier and heavier, so does the violence in the video, and when it reaches its fever pitch, Joey Styles yells in the background “THIS IS EXTREME!” The video ends and fades into the ECW logo with the words “Join the Revolution” under it. Static then fills the screen and we are now in the Eagles Nest with “The Voice of Extreme Championship Wrestling” Joey Styles!
“We are in the Brook Park Armory in Brook Park, Ohio, and you are about to watch the most exciting, most edgy, most EXTREME hour in television today…ECW Hardcore TV! We are on the road to Cyberslam 2001, the annual ECW fan convention and supercard, and it is only 3 weeks away! The card is already shaping up to be huge, with a championship match already signed for the show! At Cyberslam, ECW Tag Team Champions Danny Doring and Roadkill will defend their titles against The Unholy Alliance of Tajiri and Mikey Whipreck, led by the Sinister Minister. And speaking of championships, in tonight’s main event, the only dual-champion in ECW, “The Man Beast” Rhino will DEFEND his ECW Television Title against one-half of The Impact Players…Justin Credible!”
With that, we now go to the ring and Simon Diamond and Johnny Swinger are already in the ring. Simon has a microphone in hand, but the crowd aren’t even letting him speak, drowning him out. Diamond’s face is getting redder and redder, and in an attempt to get the crowd to shut up, Swinger gets the microphone from Diamond.
“HEY! All of you should just be quiet! CIVILISED people let others speak!”
Needless to say, that doesn’t help at all, and even caused the noise to increase anymore. Finally, Simon just can’t take it anymore.
"SIMON’S GOT A PROBLEM! YOU ALL NEED TO LEARN SOME RESPECT for Simon Diamond and Johnny Swinger! Simon Diamond and Johnny Swinger are the two most talented workers in this company, and you all need to show it! See Simon Diamond came out here to make a point, and you all just proved Simon right! I’m sick of people ignoring Simon Diamond, I’m sick of people overlooking Simon Diamond! Simon refuses to be overlooked! If Simon and Johnny Swinger don’t get the respect they deserve, then-"
Simon gets cut off, not by the crowd (although they were trying really hard to), but by “Roadhouse Blues” by the Doors! Meaning only one thing…Danny Doring and Roadkill come out from the back and their making a beeline towards the ring! The tag champs are bringing a referee with them, and it could be impromptu match time! The crowd is giving the champions a big ovation, because of their popularity AND the fact that they want to see Diamond get his ass kicked! But Simon has other plans and begins yelling again.
"What the hell do you two think your doing! Simon Diamond demands that you don’t go into my rin-"
He gets cut off again, by a dropkick to the chest from Danny Doring! Simon gets knocked down, and by the time he’s up, the bell has already rung!
Simon Diamond and Johnny Swinger vs. Danny Doring and Roadkill
Simon Diamond is PISSED off, not expecting to have to wrestle tonight. Johnny Swinger offers to represent their team first, and Diamond is happy to let him wrestle first, retreating into the ring apron. On the other side, its “Dastardly” Danny Doring who’s going to represent his team, so it will be Doring vs. Swinger to start things off. The two men circle each other, both not wanting to make the first move. Finally, they tie up, and Doring gets the advantage pretty quickly. He manages to get a hold of Johnny’s arm and then pulls him into a nice short-armed clothesline. Doring goes for the quick cover…one and a half only. Danny backs up a bit and lets Swinger get back up, and when he does, the two lock up again. Swinger gets the advantage this time, able to get Doring into a side-headlock. Danny escapes the headlock by shooting him off the ropes, but Swinger reverses the irish-whip and sends Doring to the ropes instead. But Danny Doring uses the momentum he gets from bouncing off the ropes and hits a nice jumping shoulder block that takes Swinger down.
Infuriated at losing both exchanges, Johnny Swinger gets back up and calls for another tie-up. Doring is happy to oblige and leans in, but Swinger rakes his eyes! The move is dirty, but it is effective, as “Dastardly” Danny Doring immediately reaches for his face. Swinger runs off the ropes….swinging neckbreaker! Johnny Swinger goes for the cover…two count only! Danny tries to crawl to his corner, but Johnny takes none of that, dropping a hard knee across “Dastardly’s” spine. Swinger stands Doring back up…and he hits a brutal Shoulder Jawbreaker! Johnny Swinger goes for the cover once more…
Doring kicks out! Swinger scowls and punts his opponent’s midsection out of frustration. He grabs Danny and takes him to his corner, before tagging Simon Diamond into the match. Now that they have the advantage, it seems like “The Problem Solver” doesn’t have anymore problems about wrestling. Diamond has a huge smile on his face as he leans Danny against the ropes and unloads with a few punches to the face. Simon Diamond irish-whips Doring, and when he comes back, Simon meets him with a hard STO. Diamond hooks the leg…
“Dastardly” Danny Doring gets his shoulder up! Diamond is in disbelief, even though it wasn’t really that big of a move. He gets right up into the face of Mike Kehner, the referee, and begins demanding that he “gives Simon Diamond the three count!”. Kehner stands by his decision causing Diamond to fume. By the time he’s given up on complaining Doring is already back up to his knees, but Simon Diamond puts him back down with a boot to the back of the head. Diamond lifts Danny up to his feet and then grabs him by the head, putting his face right in front of Doring’s face. “SIMON DIAMOND DIDN’T GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO KNEEL!” With that said, Simon brings Doring over with a hard snap suplex, punctuating his words. He stands Doring up again and hits another snap suplex, and Simon immediately gets him back to his feet again! “The Problem Solver” sets Danny Doring up for a Northern Lights Suplex, placing his head under one of Doring’s arms, but that backfires on him, as Danny Doring comes alive, dropping Simon Diamond head first with a DDT! Diamond quickly gets back to his feet, although he definitely looks rattled from the DDT. Simon Diamond is almost frothing from the mouth, having a hard time believing what just happened. This gives Danny the chance to get back to his corner and tag in Roadkill…but right before he can tag him in, Diamond comes back to earth and grabs him by the feet. Diamond tries to pull Danny Doring back to the center of the ring, but Doring kicks him away! Simon flies to the other side of the ring and Danny tags Roadkill in!
“The Angry Amish Chicken Plucker” comes charging out of his corner, but Diamond high-tails out of the ring! Roadkill goes to pursue him, but he is blocked by Johnny Swinger. Swinger charges at Roadkill, but gets DECAPITATED by a big lariat. Roadkill rolls to the outside, going after Diamond, but “The Problem Solver” is already on the other side of the ring. Simon Diamond screams at Roadkill from the other side, but that inattentiveness costs him…as he backs up into Danny Doring, who has a grin on his face. Diamond turns slowly, and when he sees Doring his eyes widen…BOOM, he gets caught by a enziguiri! Simon Diamond goes down, and Doring rolls him back into the ring. Despite looking exhausted from the beating he just took, “Dastardly” Danny Doring goes up top. He yells something to Roadkill, who slides into the ring and lifts Diamond up into a wheelbarrow hold. Doring jumps off…BUGGY BANG! Diamond is knocked clean out and Roadkill covers…
Winner: Danny Doring and Roadkill > Pinfall > Buggy Bang
ECW Hardcore TV returns and we are in the ringside area, Swinger, Diamond, Doring and Roadkill all gone “Man in the Box” by Alice in Chains is playing and the rowdy Ohio crowd are up on their feet, as that song can only mean that the always popular Tommy Dreamer is on his way to the ring! And surely enough, Dreamer does come out, wearing a plain ECW shirt and jeans. Being the uber-face that he is, Dreamer high-fives some of the fans in the front row, before asking for and receiving a microphone from ring announcer Bob Artese. Dreamer enters the ring and begins talking.
“ ‘Fore I begin, I just want to say thank you all for taking time out of your day and comin’ here to support ECW. We’ve been through some hard times recently, but it’s because of all of ya’ that we’re even having this show right now. So from the bottom of my heart, thanks.”
The crowd shows their appreciation for ECW, giving Tommy a good pop.
The chant brings a smile to Tommy’s face and when it ends he continues.
“Anyways, I’m not here on a PR job, I’ve got another reason. But before I can say it, I need to ask somebody to come out here….CW Anderson, get yourself out to this ring man.”
After a few seconds of silence, “Sad But True” by Metallica hits and CW Anderson comes out, all business, and rolls into the ring. He is the epitome of intensity, staring a hole through Dreamer’s face.. The tension in the ring is palpable, but that doesn’t stop Dreamer from talking.
“I’ll just cut to the chase. I heard what you said last week, how you wanted a rematch with me at Cyberslam. Well Anderson, I accept. Cyberslam, Tommy Dreamer versus CW Anderson for the second time.”
"Oh my god! I guess its official then! At Cyberslam 2001, these two will face off in a rematch from Guilty as Charged!"
Anderson looks satisfied and turns to leave, but before he can, Dreamer stops him.
“Wait a second, I’m not finished yet. Anderson, at Guilty as Charged we had a hell of a match. And I’m the type of guy who always wants to do better every time he goes to this ring. So the way I see it, a normal match just won’t do. No, if we’re going to have a rematch, we’re going to have a rematch, the EXTREME way. So you want a rematch? Fine, but if we’re going to do it, we’re not just going to have any old fashioned match. Cyberslam is a fan convention right? It’s for the fans? Well how about this. Cyberslam Tommy Dreamer versus CW Anderson....in a Fans Bring the Weapons match!"
There’s the twist! The crowd are on their feet and are showing their support for the idea. Anderson strokes his chin as if he’s thinking about it, but then he looks around…and nods his head! It’s on! Dreamer smiles and then extends his hand, offering a handshake…Anderson stares at his hand....and then grabs the mic away from Dreamer! He gets a few boos for that, but “The Enforcer” doesn’t seem to give a damn.
"Tommy, before I shake your hand, I just want you to know something. Like I said last week Tommy, I respect the hell out of you. So I want to tell you…that what I’m going to do to you at Cyberslam…its nothing personal. You’ve got to understand Tommy, this ring…is my life. This ring is ME! This ring…its my goddamn legacy. And I can’t…I WON’T let my only legacy be “the guy who lost to Tommy Dreamer two times”. I CAN’T LET THAT HAPPEN TOMMY! So at Cyberslam…when I’m making you bleed…when I’m tearing into your body with the weapon that the people bring…when I WIN THE MATCH….I want you to know….it’s ONLY business.”
With that said, he drops the microphone and takes Dreamers hand! But Dreamer pulls him close, so that they are nose-to-nose and we have a classic stare-off! But before the situation develops anymore, static fills the screen and we are now in the Eagles Nest with Joey Styles staring intently at the camera.
“Well there you go folks, the match has been signed for Cyberslam, which is already shaping up to look like a massive show! On February 4, the ECW tag team titles WILL be defended by Danny Doring and Roadkill, against The Unholy Alliance, led by The Sinister Minister. Also on the cards is the Internet Choice match, where you the fans will be able to vote ONLINE who you want to see compete. The list of competitors will go out the week before the event. Finally, as you just saw, Tommy Dreamer and CW Anderson will have a rematch from Guilty as Charged, and it won’t just be any match…it’s going to be a Fans Bring the Weapons match, and what a brawl that will be! So all of you in the Tri-City area, and even those who AREN’T, mark your calendars, because it’s going to be a hell of a show.”
The camera zooms into his face, before we fade back to the ring, and it looks like its match-time. 1/3 of The Hot Commodity, “Confederate Currency” Chris Hamrick is already in the ring.. Hamrick shouts abuse at the fans, who respond in kind, one particularly rowdy fan yelling that “YOUR MOM AND DAD ARE COUSINS!” referencing Hamrick being a proud “redneck”.
“Hit Me With Your Best Shot” by Pat Benatar hits to a big pop as Nova makes his way to the ring. For Nova, this isn’t just any normal match, this is a chance for vengeance. As Nova is walking towards the ring, we go on a EXTREME REPLAY, showing us a clip from last week’s Hardcore TV. The clip shows The Hot Commodity ambushing Nova and helping Chris Chetti beat him down. We go back to the present, and Nova is already in the ring. The bell sounds and the match is on!
The Ohio crowd are in a uproar! Some fans have begun throwing trash into the ring, and The Hot Commodity and Chris Chetti get the HELL out of dodge before a riot breaks out! Nova is slowly coming to in the ring, and he looks around the building confused, before realization sets in. Nova slams his fist into the mat before rolling outside the ring and running to the back! He’s going after them!
Nova vs. Chris Hamrick
Nova doesn’t waste any time at all, getting right up in Chris Hamrick’s face, going nose-to-nose with the 35 year old veteran. But “Confederate Currency” Chris Hamrick won’t take shit from any young punk, no, he makes Nova back up a bit by slapping the taste right out of his mouth! Needless to say, Nova doesn’t take to that to kindly and after stroking his cheek, he returns the favor with a slap of his own! Hamrick answers back with a hard forearm to the face, and once again Nova fires right back. The fists are now flying, and after a brief stalemate, Hamrick takes the advantage after ducking under one of Nova’s punches and hitting a hard stiff uppercut to the jaw. Hamrick goes for the irish-whip, Nova reverses and sends him into the ropes instead. Chris comes back and goes for a clothesline but Nova ducks under that and then runs off the rope, and when he rebounds off of them he gets met with a hard boot to the face! Hamrick covers, not even a one count though.
Nova gets back to his feet and Hamrick locks him into a front headlock, but Nova pushes him into the corner. Hamrick is reluctant to release the headlock, but a hard shoulder thrust to the midsection from Nova does the trick. Now free, Nova hits another shoulder thrust before going to the other side of the ring. Nova charges’, looking for a corner splash, but Hamrick catches him and tosses him over the top rope. Nova lands on the ring apron, and Chris Hamrick turns to try and knock him off. But Nova is prepared and catches Hamrick with a right hand, making him step back. Nova slingshots himself off the ropes and goes for a nice Springboard Clothesline, but Chris Hamrick runs forward and dodges it. Nova lands on his feet in the center of the ring….and his head is nearly knocked off his body by a stiff clothesline! Hamrick covers, but he only gets a two count!
After those frenetic opening minutes, the match begins to slow down, the advantage firmly with “Confederate Currency” Chris Hamrick. Chris gets back up to his feet and takes his time, stalking Nova’s body, dropping the occasional knee or elbow. After about 15 seconds of doing this, Hamrick drops down and mounts Nova, before unleashing about a dozen hard punches all aimed at Nova’s face! Nova is caught off guard and begins covering up, but most of the punches go through. After that, Hamrick decides to get down and dirty, fish hooking Nova! For the uninformed, fish hooking is a “maneuver” where one wrestler shoves his fingers into a opponent’s mouth and then uses them to pull the opponent’s gums, prying their mouth open. So yeah, not exactly a pretty thing to see. Nova is flailing on the floor, trying to get Hamrick off of him, but Chris Hamrick is RELENTLESS and pulls even harder until Nova has no choice but to bite down! That does the trick and Hamrick gets his fingers out, but it doesn’t matter, because the damage is done. Hamrick gets back up and then drops a big knee to the back of Nova’s head, and then hooks the leg…ONE…TWO…T- Nova kicks out!
By now, Hamrick is already a bit irate at not being able to put Nova away. He brings Nova up to a vertical base and then cinches him into a side headlock, but Nova begins fighting back desperately with elbows to Hamrick’s midsection! “Confederate Currency” Chris Hamrick desperately holds on, but the elbows get him to loosen the headlock, letting Nova shoot him off the ropes and escape. Hamrick comes bouncing off the ropes and tries for a Yakuza Kick…Nova ducks under it and then runs off the ropes as well…he comes back but is met with a hard knee lift from Chris Hamrick! Nova stumbles back up to his feet and Hamrick grabs him and then lifts him into the air, setting up a vertical suplex…but Hamrick has other things in mind and forces Nova to spin 180 degrees in mid-air before hitting one of his trademark moves, a Suplex Stunner that he calls, The Dixie Drop! Nova is down and out, and Hamrick drops down and goes for the win…..
NOVA GETS HIS SHOULDER UP! HE GETS HIS SHOULDER UP JUST IN TIME! Hamrick goes from being annoyed to being completely furious, getting up and stomping around the ring. He shoves the referee, telling him that it was a three, but the official doesn’t change his mind. Hamrick continues pacing around the ring, not sure what to do. Finally, after thinking it out, Chris Hamrick decides to go to the top rope! The 35-year old wrestling veteran climbs to the top and then jumps off, looking for The Confederate Crunch, a Diving Leg Drop! But Nova rolls out of the ring, and Hamrick misses his mark! Nova manages to get out of the ring and is leaning on the fan barricade trying to regain his bearings. In the ring, Hamrick has gotten back up to his feet and then goes out of the ring, going after Nova. But Nova doesn’t go down with a fight, catching Hamrick with a right hand. Chris didn’t expect it coming and is stunned for a few seconds, letting Nova grab him by the head and throw him head-first into the ring apron. Nova begins laying into Hamrick with forearms, before grabbing him again, and then throwing him into the iron barricade keeping the fans from the ring. Nova climbs onto the ring apron and then climbs to the top rope and waits for Hamrick to get back up to his feet. When he does, Nova points towards the locker room and yells “This is for you Chetti!” before leaping off! Hamrick is barely able to react, as Nova grabs his neck in MID-AIR and hits a STUNNING Flying Neckbreaker!
“OH MY GOD!”
Both men are down and out, lying lifeless on the outside! Slowly but surely however, Nova begins to get back up to his feet, using the ring apron for leverage. Nova rolls Hamrick into the ring before following him in and going for a desperate cover….
Hamrick gets his shoulder up at two and three-fourths! Now its NOVA’s turn to be in shock as he leans back on the ropes, looking up at the ceiling in disbelief. But he doesn’t dwell on it for to long, instead grabbing Hamrick and lifting him into position for The Kryptonite Crunch! HE HITS IT! Nova hits the move! He’s going for the cover!
THE PINFALL IS BROKEN…BY CHRIS CHETTI! Chetti and Hamrick’s stablemates Julio Dinero and EZ Money have run down to the ring and are now putting the boots to Nova! Chetti lifts Nova up to his feet…and he plants Nova with the Amityville Horror for the SECOND WEEK IN A ROW! Dinero and Money takes Hamrick and places him on top of Nova, the referee has no choice but to count it!
Winner: Chris Hamrick > Pinfall > Amityville Horror from Chris Chetti
We’re back on Hardcore TV, and we are met with Joey Styles in The Eagles Nest.
“Welcome back to ECW Hardcore TV, and we are on the road…to Cyberslam 2001, which is only THREE weeks away. As I mentioned earlier in the program, the card is shaping up quite nicely, several matches already being confirmed. However, there is one thing that nobody here in ECW is sure about…and that’s the situation around the ECW World Title. The status quo in the World Title division has been constantly changing, and as of tonight, no clear challenger for the title has been set. At Guilty as Chargeed 2001, Rhino blindsided “The Extreme Icon” The Sandman and was able to take the ECW World Heavyweight Championship for his own and become the only dual champion in Extreme Championship Wrestling. And last week, The New Impact Players, Steve Corino and Justin Credible attempted to make a case for themselves as well, attacking Rhino, only for the tables to turn and be on the losing side of the brawl. And THEN in the same night, Balls Mahoney stepped up to the plate and attacked Rhino with a steel chair! With so many different challengers and personalities involved, its going to take something big to stand out, and in tonight’s main event, that’s what Justin Credible will attempt to do, when he takes on Rhino in a match for the ECW Television Championship. We were able to get comments from Credible and the rest of The Impact Players earlier this evening."
That takes us backstage, and The New Impact Players are all there. Justin Credible is dressed to compete and is sitting down on a chair, Francine giving him a back-rub. “The King of Old School” Steve Corino is staring at the camera intently, while Jack Victory just leans on the wall.
"Rhino…you think you’re on top of the world. You’re “The Man Beast”. Your “the only dual champion in ECW today”. You’ve been compared to some of the best and most dominant wrestlers in ECW history…guys like Terry Funk and Sabu…MONSTERS, like Taz and Bam Bam Bigelow…and quite frankly…I think it’s a fair comparison. Because just like all of those PIECES OF CRAP, compared to the Impact Players…you’re NOTHING RHINO! And right now, you may be “the only dual champion in ECW” but not for long. Because TONIGHT, Justin here…he’s going to beat you, and take your Television Title. And then…then I’m going to be coming for MY ECW World Heavyweight Title. Your days are numbered Rhino.”
Credible stands up and grins at the camera.
"Oh yeah, The Impact Players are THE most dominant unit in not just ECW, but in the entire goddamn industry. Not YOU Rhino, not SANDMAN, THE IMPACT PLAYERS! And you and all those losers in the crowd tonight are gonna’ see that first-hand when I beat you down and pin you, one two there, and take your ECW Television Title for myself. Hehe, and when I do, it ain’t just gonna’ be the coolest…it isn’t just gonna’ be the best….it’s gonna’ be…just incredible!"
With that, Credible goes into his usual pose, and Corino slaps Jack Victory in the chest. Victory steps up to the camera…
And the static this. When the feed returns, we are now back in the Brook Parks Armory, and announcer Bob Artese and referee John Finnegan are already in the ring for the main event. “Snap Your Fingers, Break Your Neck” by Grinspoon hits to boos and insults from the crowd. The New Impact Players come out of the back all together, the challenger Justin Credible getting hyped up by Corino and Jack Victory. Francine is holding Credible’s favorite Singapore cane, and by the look on Justin’s face he’s expecting to go to war. Credible is looking to make a big impact in this match, and a win here would go a long way in propelling him up the rankings in ECW. Credible rolls into the ring alone and then leans over the ropes, getting more advice from Corino.
But their attentions are diverted when “Debonair” by Dope begins to play, getting a big mixed reaction from the crowd, leaning towards heel heat. Rhino comes out with both his title belts slung around his shoulders and on the way to the ring he heckles a couple of ringside fans, daring them to punch him. He enters the ring, and then points at Justin, before hunching down, as if preparing for his finisher, the Gore. With both men in the ring, Stephen DeAngelis goes to the center and begins the introductions.
"Ehm…LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, the following match-up is tonight’s MAIN EVENT, and is for the ECW Television Title! ON MY RIGHT, from Ozone Park, New York…he weighs in at 225 pounds, and is ONE HALF of the IMPACT PLAYERS…he is the challenger…JUSTIN…CREDIBLE!"
More boos as Credible goes to the center of the ring and then poses for the fans. Rhino is impatient now, bouncing from toe to toe, ready for the action to begin.
"And on my LEFT, hailing from DETROIT, MICHIGAN and weighing in at 270 pounds…he is THE ECW WORLD AND TELEVISION CHAMPION, the only dual champion in Extreme Championship Wrestling…he is…”THE MAN BEAST”…RHINO!"
With that, Rhino drops both his titles to the ground and then jumps onto the top turnbuckle before letting out a chilling howl. He gets off and then turns towards Credible as DeAngelis gets out of the ring. Referee John Finnegan signals for the bell to ring, and it does, starting the match!
The screen has faded out completely to black, but that doesn’t mean the show is over yet…because “Misirlou” begins to play in the background…PULP FICTION PROMO TIME!
Justin Credible vs. Rhino
ECW Television Title match
Despite Rhino being more of a heelish tweener, against Justin Credible, he’s got the crowd on his side.
RHINO’S GOING TO KILL YOU!
*CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*
RHINO’S GOING TO KILL YOU
*CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*
The chant is getting on Credible’s nerves, who turns to the crowd and yells at them, but that just causes them to get even louder. Justin eventually just gives up and shakes his head, turning back towards Rhino. “The Man Beast” has a glint in his eyes and is staring at Credible like a piece of meat. The two slowly circle around the ring, waiting for the right opportunity to pounce. But then from the outside, “The King of Old School” Steve Corino starts yelling at Rhino. “The Man Beast” turns to the outside and begins yelling back and Credible uses that opportunity to catch Rhino by surprise and he goes for a rollup!
Rhino kicks out with authority and both men immediately get back up to their feet. That cheap shot didn’t do ANYTHING but piss Rhino off, and everybody knows, you never piss of animal! The two begin circling each other once more, but this time, Rhino isn’t going to be distracted. They lock up in the center of the ring…and Rhino doesn’t even BOTHER with any technical wrestling, he just throws Credible to the other side of the ring! Credible gets up and he looks a bit shaken by Rhino’s strength. Nevertheless, they lock up once again, but once again, Rhino just takes Credible and just manhandles him, throwing him to the other side once again. The rest of The Impact Players look upset at what’s going on, Francine yelling support for Credible while Jack Victory and Corino are yelling at Rhino, trying to distract him. Justin slowly gets back up, a bit more wary of going mano-a-mano with Rhino. He utilizes the ring, moving from corner to corner, trying to keep Rhino off balanced. Finally, Rhino’s had enough, and he lunges towards Credible! But Justin sidesteps him and when Rhino turns back around, he gets caught with a big right hand! Justin begins unloading with forearms, forcing Rhino into the corner. Justin climbs onto “The Man Beast’s” shoulders and begins raining down blows to the forehead, but Rhino suddenly charges out of the corner...he plants Justin Credible into the mat with a powerbomb!
Rhino gets back up and then brings Credible back up to his feet as well. Rhino lifts Justin up on his shoulders, and then lets out a primal war scream before hitting a sick looking powerslam. The ECW World Champion stays on top, going for the pin…two counts only. “The King of Old School” Steve Corino is very active on the outside, yelling and heckling Rhino. At first, “The Man Beast” just ignores him, but eventually he turns towards Corino and yells back. “Why don’t you get in here you fuckin’ pussy?!” Of course Corino doesn’t respond, and when Rhino turns back, Credible has already come to and lunges at Rhino with a few punches. Credible manages to fight his way back to his feet and then whips Rhino into the ropes. Justin Credible tries for a hip toss, but Rhino blocks it and transitions into a hip toss of his own. Justin stumbles back up to his feet, using the turnbuckle as a support, and Rhino charges him. Credible manages to side-step him though, and metal is all that Rhino charges into. “The Man Beast” begins stumbling back…and he gets taken down by a Discus Clothesline from Credible. Justin covers…barely a two count though; Rhino has way to much fight in him to be taken out here.
While Rhino is slowly getting back up, Justin Credible leans over the ropes and gets his Singapore cane from Francine. Rhino is back up to a vertical base, Credible measures him up…SMACK, cane shot to the skull! But Rhino’s still on his feet though. Credible lines him up again…SMACK, another cane shot, yet Rhino’s still standing! Justin can’t believe Rhino is still up, but gets over his shock and goes for one more cane shot! But in desperation, Rhino suddenly gets a burst of adrenaline and is able to grab the cane mid-swing and wrest it away from Credible! Rhino throws the cane out the ring, and Credible is in complete shock. Justin recomposes himself after a few seconds and then swings at Rhino, but “The Man Beast” catches the fist, wraps his arms around Credible’s waist…BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX! Justin Credible goes flying across to the opposite side of the ring!
After several seconds, Rhino is the first to get up, but Justin Credible is almost up to his feet as well. But he might want to stay down though…because Rhino is measuring him for the GORE! Credible slowly stumbles back onto his feet…RHINO CHARGES…Gore! Gore! GO- Wait…no! Steve Corino was able to pull his teammate out of the ring just in time! Credible leans on the ring apron, resting, while Francine and Corino whispering talking to him and giving him advice. But Rhino goes to the outside and is going after Justin Credible. Victory tries to stop him, but gets dropped by a right hand, Corino tries to block Rhino as well, but he gets the same fate! Nothing else between Rhino and his prey…except Francine of course! Francine leaps onto Rhino’s back, scratching away at his eyes. After a brief struggle, “The Man Beast” manages to throw her off, and then grabs Justin Credible. He has Credible by the hand…THUD, he slams him head-first into the metal post! Justin slumps to the ground and he’s been busted open! The crowd, being the blood-marks that they are, is going crazy at the sight of the juice! Rhino stands Credible back up and then throws him into the ring like a rag doll…but before he can go back into the ring himself, he gets put down by a chair shot to the back of the head by Steve Corino, who’s had enough of being in the sidelines. Corino and Jack Victory roll Rhino into the ring and then begin stomping away, making sure that Rhino STAYS down! Justin Credible soon joins in, after wiping his face of the blood, and hell, even Francine gets a few shots in!
“This isn’t a match, this is a mugging!”
Rhino’s attempts at fighting back were put out before they could gain any momentum, and after a while, he’s unable to even try. The New Impact Players are standing victoriously over the ECW World and Television Champion, and Steve Corino request a microphone from the outside.
“Let this be an example, to everybody thinking of getting in the way…of The Impact Players! We will…put you all down if we have to, and you know what…that’s what we’re going to do to this piece of shit right here!”
Corino nods at Credible who grins and then lifts Rhino onto his shoulders, he’s setting up for his finisher, a Spinning Belly-to-Belly Piledriver that he calls That’s Incredible! They’re looking to take Rhino out, right here and now! Corino nods at Justin one more time, and he’s going for it….but then…a song begins to play. And not just any song either. For a few moments, it seems like everything has stopped. The New Impact Players are motionless, Corino dropping the microphone and just staring into the crowd, disbelief on his face. Justin Credible is so distracted; he doesn’t even notice that he dropped Rhino. At first, the entire Brook Park Armory is silent. And then the song gets into full gear. The crowd goes wild. The singing begins.
Say your prayers little one
Don’t forget, my son
To include everyone…
Tuck you in, warm within
Keep you free from sin
Till the sandman he comes…
Sleep with one eye open!
Gripping your pillow tight!
TAKE MY HAND….
WE’RE OFF TO NEVER NEVER LAND!
The entire arena begins singing along to the lyrics of “Enter Sandman” by Metallica, which can only mean one thing! THE SANDMAN IS IN THE BUILDING! And soon enough, the former ECW World Champion appears, Singapore Cane in one hand, can of beer in the other! His face is heavily bandaged, and he obviously looks exhausted just walking down the stairs but that doesn’t stop him from KICKING ASS and taking names! The Sandman slides into the ring, and the shit is on! Francine happens to be the first one in his path, and lady or not, she gets a CANE SHOT to the head! Corino is next, and “The King of Old School” tries to dodge it, but The Sandman gets him right in the midsection, slamming the wooden cane into his flesh. But Justin Credible has managed to get himself together, and has a chair in hand….but he gets SENT OUT OF THE RING WITH A GORE FROM RHINO WHO HAS GOTTEN BACK UP TO HIS FEET! The Gore was relatively weak, after all, he did just get beaten down, but it does the job in taking Justin Credible out. With all his stablemates down and out, Jack Victory decides to cut his losses, managing to get out of the ring just in time, and The New Impact Players fall back to the locker rooms en masse and I suppose the match is a no-contest. Back in the ring however, the action isn’t done…not even close.
Sandman and Rhino have managed to take The New Impact Players out, but they still hate each others guts. Upon seeing one another, there isn’t any dramatic stare-down, no, they begin tearing into each other with rights and lefts! Both men are obviously tired, Sandman due to his injuries from Guilty as Charged, and Rhino because of participating in a match only moments ago. But that doesn’t stop them from throwing blows, and both men refuse to go down! They are fully intent on duking it out until one of them gives up…or just straight up dies! But it isn’t to be so, as the cavalry hits the ring, in the form of an army of production workers and wrestlers who begin splitting them apart. The screen begins to fade, the main show ending on a frenetic note, Sandman and Rhino throwing punches at anybody and everybody in sight. The final image we see before we fade out completely is of Sandman a manic glint in his eye, cursing and yelling at Rhino.
We start this one off in the locker room of The Fully Blooded Italians…and why the hell do they get their own locker room? Anyways, the group of “Italians” is just relaxing, Little Guido reading the newspaper, Sal Graziano is eating a pizza, and Tony Mamaluke…is singing “That’s Amore” by Dean Martin?!
“When the moon hits the sky, like a big pizza pie, that’s amore…”
Errr…wonder where that’s going! We fade out and now we’re in some sort of gym, weights and other fitness machines in the background, with Cyrus the Virus.
"Rob Van Dam…you represent ECW. You ARE ECW. And that’s why my client Jerry Lynn…he is going to destroy you. I will kill off this company Rob, and I AM STARTING WITH YOU!"
Camera swivels to the side, to Jerry Lynn who is on his back, bench pressing.
We now go to Danny Doring and Roadkill, standing in front of a generic ECW banner.
“The Unholy Alliance is gunning for us Roadkill, but are we scared? No. Because the fact is, they just aren’t on our level. Sinister Minister, you want your boys to come out of Cyberslam with the ECW Tag Team Titles? Heh, then you better pray extra hard, because the only way that’s gonna’ happen is if god swoops down and TAKES it from us. And even then, it’s going to be one hell of a fight. Right Roadkill?”
Doring nods at “The Angry Amish Chicken Plucker” who glares at the camera.
We’re back with the F.B.I….and now Guido and Graziano have joined Mamaluke in the singing!
Little Guido, Sal Graziano and Tony Mamaluke:
“When your eyes seem to shine like you’ve had to much whine, that’s amore!”
Now we’re with “The Innovator of Violence” Tommy Dreamer!
“CW Anderson…when you and me go into that ring on Cyberslam, it’s going to be a war. But if you want to beat me, if you NEED to beat me, like you’ve been saying….then be prepared to have to KILL ME FIRST!”
We now go to some hallway in the building, and Nova is pissed off!
“CHETTI! CHETTI YOU SON OF A BITCH WHERE ARE YOU!”
He continues walking, and suddenly he see’s Chetti at the end of the hallway! Nova’s eyes widen and he charges his rival…only to get CLOCKED by a chairshot from Chris Hamrick who pops out of one of the doors. Nova’s down, and Chetti approaches his body, a shit-eating smile on his face.
“Nova…when are you gonna’ learn. There’s power…in numbers.”
With that he kicks Nova’s body, and then turns to leave, as we fade out to the next promo…
We are back to the gym with Lynn and Cyrus, and it seems like “The New F’n Show” is done bench pressing. His spotter lifts the weights off of him and Lynn gets up, wiping his face with a towel.
"RVD! No more bullshit, no more draws, no more losses! Living Dangerously 2001…I’m going to beat you! Because if I can’t beat you Van Dam…I’d rather die..."
The camera goes back to Cyrus, who has a smug smile on his face.
Back to the F.B.I locker-room, and they’re having a great time, still singing.
Tony Mamaluke, Little Guido, Sal Graziano:
"WHEN THE STARS SEEM TO DROOL LIKE A PASTA FAZOOL-"
They get cut off by another man, who enters the room. The man has blonde hair and a skinny frame, and is wearing a nice suit and sunglasses. Mamaluke and Graziano don’t seem to know him, but Little Guido’s eyes widen upon seeing him. Mamaluke steps up and then shoves the mystery man.
“Hasn’t ‘chu heard of knockin’ before?! Who da’ hell are you?”
The mystery man grins and then shakes his head.
"No, no, no, the real question my friend…is who da’ hell do you think you are? Where’d you get this creep Guido?"
Mamaluke turns to Little Guido Maritato, his friend and stablemate, who is still in shock.
“Guido, you know this guy?”
“Does he know me? Hahahaha, does he know me?! Haha, he never told you he had a brother?"
The man laughs and then takes off his sunglasses and extends his hand.
“Heh…you can call me…Spanky. Spanky Maritato.”
Finally, we’re now with “The Hardcore Chair Swingin’ Freak” Balls Mahoney, who’s seated in a room...filled with chairs.
“Ever since I attacked you last week Rhino, people’ve been asking me. Why would I mess with a monster like you? My family and friends, they’ve been telling me to back off. My girlfriend wants me to quit so I can get away from you. But that ain’t me. I don’t run from fights. At Guilty as Charged Rhino, you tried to cripple me and a half-dozen other people. YOU NEARLY BROKE ME IN HALF YOU SON OF A BITCH! BUT YOU DIDN’T BREAK MY PRIDE! I’M COMING AFTER YOU RHINO, WITH EVERYTHING I’VE GOT! AND I DON’T CARE IF YOU BREAK MY BACK, OR YOU BREAK MY SPINE, I’M NEVER GONNA’ BACK DOWN!”
And with that, he stands up and grabs two of the nearest chairs and then lifts them both into the air, like a samurai heading into battle….