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Monday Night Raw - May 1st, 2006; Columbus, Ohio

“So, I’m here. Now it’s your turn …"



The Return of the King



Before we get the usual pyrotechnics and opening video, a video package plays, hyping the shocking events of 24-hours ago at Backlash, concentrating on AAE’s new team, “The Sons Of Samoa” debuting; Ric Flair announcing his retirement but being confronted by Randy Orton; Big Show retiring RVD despite Triple H’s return, and HBK returning to screw John Cena out of the WWE Championship.

Now we get the opening Raw video, and quickly following that, the pyro display. After, we’re brought into the arena, where thousands of rabid fans are ready for Monday Night Raw. J.R., Coach, and Styles welcome us…

Jim Ross: Dark days - are indeed - upon us! Hello, everyone, and welcome to Monday Night Raw, just twenty-four hours removed from one of the most shocking, controversial and altogether heartbreaking pay-per-views of all time, Backlash! I’m good ol’ J.R., Jim Ross, here at ringside alongside Joey Styles and Jonathan Coachman!

Jonathan Coachman: “Heartbreaking”, J.R.? Are you kidding me? Last night was one of, if not THE greatest night in the history of Monday Night Raw. We saw Carlito hold on to the Money in the Bank, Haas & Benjamin get DEMOLISHED by my man ‘Mando’s new team, and, best of all, the END of the career of ‘Mr. Unemployed’ Rob - Van - Dam. Haha!

Joey Styles:
I’m glad you had so much fun, Coach, but be that as it may, not only is RVD now without a job, a way to feed his family, but after the assault perpetrated by “HBK” Shawn Michaels last night, John Cena now joins The Showstopper as another superstar to be medically suspended by Eric Bischoff! He’s not here!


“OOOOH CHAVO”



Columbus lets out a nice pop for the man who (rather shabbily on my part, I must add) failed to make the Backlash card last, Chavo Guerrero, who heads down to the ring with his usual gusto, clad in his red tights, black ‘I’m Your Papi’ t-shirt, and bandana. Diving through the ropes as only he can, Chavito Heat drops to a knee in the ring, points to the sky, before posing to more cheers.

Jim Ross: Well, we are gettin’ things under way with a match made earlier today on wwe.com by Eric Bischoff, pitting the two men who have been pursuing Carlito’s Money in the Bank contract vigorously since WrestleMania, against one another!

Joey Styles: “You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours”, J.R. Last night Carlito and his buddy “The Masterpiece” gave a huge assist to Big Show, and are partly responsible for Rob Van Dam’s career being over, so I guess this is the return favour, huh?

Jonathan Coachman: Ever heard of a “match”, Joey Styles? That’s what this is. Carlito beat Gregory Helms fair and square last night, and he took one hell of a tumble from that steel cage, so if you don’t mind, I think he deserves a little ‘R & R’.

“GREGORY HELMS”



An ovation, a little bit louder and a little bit more mixed than Chavo’s, greets ‘Firestorm’, as the increasingly popular youngster, Gregory Helms enters the arena with his arm raised confidently in the air. Draped in his long, leather, sleeveless trench-coat and doo rag, Helms quickly skirts up the ring steps and enters the ring, not looking too fondly upon his sometime tag team partner, Guerrero.

Joey Styles: Who knows what young Gregory Helms must be feeling right now? Last night he was within seconds of taking the Money in the Bank contract away from the despicable Carlito, but, of course, The Masterpiece was on hand to ensure that did not happen.

Jonathan Coachman: What!? I don’t know what match you were watching, Joey, but all I saw was Helms nail The Masterpiece for no reason, and then, when ‘Lito tried to hand the briefcase to the official, Helms jumped in the way and got hit!

Jim Ross: Where do you get off comin’ up with these – these asinine excuses, Coach? You make some of The King’s look positively plausible! “… tried to hand the briefcase to the official.” Gimme a break. Jack Doan would’ve been knocked out if he’d gotten that.

The two competitors, now ready to “get it on”, stretch against the ropes, watching as referee Mike Chioda has a heated discussion with Lillian Garcia at ringside. The lovely announcer looks extremely confused, and Chioda shrugs helplessly, leaving her…

Lillian Garcia: Ladies and gentlemen, I have just been informed that, (reads from paper) by order of General Manager Eric Bischoff {crowd boos}, this will be the first match in “Eric Bischoff’s Extreme Initiative” in preparation for Raw’s annual visit to New York’s Hammerstein Ballroom for ECW One Night Stand on June 11th.

~ Great pop for the mention of ONS, with a small “EC-Dub” chant even starting. Chavo and Helms though, look thoroughly confused, with Greg holding his hands out at Lillian.

Lillian Garcia: Therefore, this match will now be … (shakes her head) a… Tables Match.

~ THUNDEROUS ovation for this announcement, with the camera quickly whirling up the ramp, where several backstage workers hurry down to the ringside area with some wood.

Lillian Garcia: Also, (still reading) any superstar who fails to or refuses to compete in “Eric Bischoff’s Extreme Initiative” … will… (looks confused) be… suspended.

~ Tremendous heat at this revelation, as Lillian sits back down, shrugging her shoulders and saying, “That’s all there is” to J.R., Styles, and a smug Coach.

Joey Styles: Oh my, I don’t believe what I’m hearing!! Eric Bischoff, who isn’t here yet by the way, ladies and gentlemen, has just ordered a – a – what are you smiling at!?

Jonathan Coachman: Nothing. Nothing at all, Joey Styles. Just sit back and relax, ‘cause you’re about to see that you don’t need to wrestle in a dirty little bingo hall to go extreme. Anything ECW can do … Monday Night Raw can do better, baby boy!

Jim Ross: Did you have somethin’ to do with this, Coach? You seem to know an awful lot about it. Oh my – what must Gregory Helms and Chavo Guerrero be thinkin’ right now? This is ridiculous!

1 - Eric Bischoff’s ‘Extreme Exhibition’; Tables Match
Gregory Helms vs. Chavo Guerrero
*If either man refuses to compete, he will be fired*

These two extremely competent athletes manage to, despite being uneasy allies against Mr. MITB since WrestleMania, put on a thrilling contest to serve as this show’s opening contest, not wasting the opportunity. Since Helms is more of a tweener than Guerrero, he has no problems instigating the physicality between the two men, and they beat the hell out of one another for the opening minutes with fists, forearms, head butts, kicks, suplexes, the whole nine yards really.

The match takes a turn for the worst for Helms when he goes under the ring to pull out a table and CHAVITO TAKES HIM OUT WITH A TOPÉ SUICIDA THROUGH THE ROPES!!

When we return from a commercial break though, it Gregory Helms who is back in control, stomping away on the multiple time tag team and Cruiserweight Champion, who then TAKES HIM DOWN with a double-leg, hammering away!! The crowd is siding with Chavito at this point, but Helms once again gets the better of the brawl, first sending Guerrero SLAMMING into the turnbuckle shoulder first, before sending him into the ropes, looking for a dropkick -- but Guerrero holds onto the ropes, and Greg CRASHES onto his back! Racing forward, Chavo quickly hits the ropes as Helms staggers back up to his feet, LOOKING FOR THAT ROLLING LIGER KICK -- but Greg moves throws one of his long legs up, WIPING CHAVO OUT with a stiff BOOT right to the face!!

The crowd actually boos Helms a bit, but he doesn’t seem to mind, as he hammers Guerrero a bit more, before tossing him carelessly into the far corner and RUNNING RIGHT THROUGH HIM with a hard corner clothesline. Seeing his opportunity, Helms leaves the ring, grabs the same table as before, props it up against the bottom rope, looking to slide it in -- BUT CHAVO SMASHES IT RIGHT BACK IN HIS FACE WITH A BASEBALL SLIDE!!

With Helms down and out, Chavo places him on the apron, before setting up the table on the outside behind him. Clambering onto the apron himself, Guerrero drags Greg up, gets behind him, applies the rear waist lock, LOOKING TO GERMAN SUPLEX HELMS THROUGH THE WOOD -- but the former Hurricane hangs onto the ropes for dear life!! After a brief struggle, Helms turns, lifting Chavo up, attempting a scoop slam through the table … only for Guerrero to land in the ring. Greg tries to vertical suplex Chavito back over the ropes--

--But Guerrero just holds on … AND SUPLEXES HELMS BACK INTO THE RING!!!

Pulling Helms back up to his feet, Chavo sends him into the ropes, BEFORE TOSSING HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE WITH MOMENTUM -- BUT GREGORY LANDS ON THE APRON!! The two men trade blows, Helms dangling over the wood below, until Chavito turns, hits the ropes, races back -- FOREARM TO THE FACE!! Helms survives, staggering his opponent, and quickly scurries up the nearby turnbuckle, getting set -- CHAVO LEAPS UP, DROPKICKING HELMS OFF THE TOP ALL THE WAY TO THE OUTSIDE!!!

Helms narrowly avoids hitting the steel steps, but he is still in a bad away, as Guerrero follows him outside, goes under the ring, PULLING OUT A SECOND TABLE, sliding it into the ring, much to the delight of the idiotic fans who’ve been chanting “WE WANT TABLES!!!” all night long. Setting it up in the middle of the ring, Chavo takes Helms, beats him down a bit more, places him across the wood, before ascending the turnbuckle nimbly. Guerrero points to the sky reluctantly, BEFORE LAUCHING HIMSELF OFF WITH THE FROG SPLASH -- BUT HELMS ROLLS OFF, AND CHAVO CRASHES THROUGH THE TABLE!!!

As “HOLY SHIT!!! HOLY SHIT!!! HOLY SHIT!!!” chants boom out around Columbus, the match continues, since Helms never put Guerrero through the wood himself. Both men take a while to recover though, and eventually it his Helms who has the advantage, as he drags the first table from the outside back into the ring, propping it up in the corner.

Sticking Chavo between his legs, Helms lifts him up onto his shoulder, high-angled, RACING ACROSS THE RING, GOING FOR THE RUNNING LIGER BOMB THROUGH THE WOOD -- Chavo slides off and SHOVES Helms towards the table--
--But Helms RUNS UP IT, climbing to the top turnbuckle -- only for Chavito to be right up there with him!! It’s a battle as Helms looks for the NIGHTMARE ON HELMS STREET FROM THE TOP -- but Chavo blocks it, gets HELMS UP – BRAINBUSTERING HIM DOWN SO THAT THEY BOTH CRASH THROUGH THE TABLE BELOW!!! Both men are destroyed as the official calls for the bell to end this travesty.


Winner - Chavo Guerrero @ 9:39.


Though it is his theme music which hits following the bell, Chavo Guerrero might as well have lost the match, as he lies in a crumpled heat amongst the broken, wooden fragments of table, with a similarly damaged Gregory Helms alongside him.

Jim Ross: Good lord. I hope Eric Bischoff’s happy, wherever that no-good S.O.B has ended up. The same goes for Carlito, ‘cause Chavo Guerrero and Gregory Helms have just destroyed one another here tonight, and for what?

Joey Styles: I know exactly what you mean, J.R., and we have Coach here to disagree with us, but I’m sorry, that match right there was nothing but a damn assassination of two of the best, brightest young stars on Monday Night Raw.

Jonathan Coachman: I dunno, fellas. I reckon I’d give that match maybe 4 out of 10, if I’m feeling generous that is. I respect Greg and Chavo’s will to compete and all that, I really do, but let’s face it, when it comes to being the very best in the business, those two guys … well they just can’t cut it, can they? Maybe if they’re injured after tonight it’s for the best. I mean c’mon, anything’s got to be better than coming out here week after week embarrassing yourself on national television, is The Coach right?


~ Medical personnel swarm the ring, as Helms and Guerrero begin to crawl away from the car crash that was the ending to their match, faces contorted in agony…








{Commercials}



*Backstage*

Just entering the building, walking with a serious limp, the Intercontinental & World Tag Team Champion Shelton Benjamin heads slowly down the hallway.

Joey Styles:
Well, there you see yet another victim of Eric Bischoff’s tirade, ladies and gentlemen, one-half of the tag team champions and the Intercontinental Champion Shelton Benjamin, who, just last night, was viciously attacked by Armando Alejandro Estrada’s new team.

Jonathan Coachman: Yes he was, Joey Styles, yes he was. That’s how you make a statement in this business. You pick out the top dogs, the champs, and you take it to ‘em on your very first night. Another great signing by Mr. Bischoff, if I might say.



*Ringside*

When we return to ringside, a virtual phalanx (look it up) of security personnel are surrounding the ring…

***OBSESSION*** Columbus delivers a strong ovation, half positive, half very negative, as the bizarre, beautiful, but FINALLY the NEW WWE Women’s Champion Mickie James … stumbles (?) out onto the stage. Ms. James looks extremely ungainly, glancing over her shoulder and clutching her title belt closely as she hurries down to the ring.

Jim Ross: Ladies and gentlemen, here comes quite possibly the most controversial Women’s Champion in the history of our business. Young Mickie James’ actions at and since WrestleMania have been … questionable to say the least.

Jonathan Coachman: Questionable … or brilliant, J.R?

Joey Styles:
Whatever they may be, there’s no denying that last night, after Trish Stratus and Victoria had not only beaten the hell out of her, but also themselves, Mickie James was able to cover Trish and become the undisputed holder of that belt which she stole back at WrestleMania in Chicago. To put things in perspective, this is Mickie’s first appearance on Raw since the night before WrestleMania … and just take a look at the ring.

Jim Ross: It looks as though young Ms. James has “asked” our esteemed General Manager for a little extra protection here tonight. Guilty conscience perhaps?


2 - Non-Title Match
Women’s Champion Mickie James vs. Gloria McCann

This isn’t the glowing, brilliant showcase for a new champion that one might expect. Remember, just 24-hours ago, Mickie James had the absolute crap beat out of her by two of the most dominant women’s wrestlers of all time, and only just won the belt by hook or crook. At several points in this contest, Mickie hits moves, only to immediately grab her back in pain -- Victoria powerbombed her last night -- and keel over. In the end though, despite the wear and tear on her gorgeous body, Ms. James is able to polish off the game local Diva with the MICKIE-DT for the academic (but overlong) victory.

Winner - Mickie James via pinfall @ 3:11.

Mickie quickly gets rid of the jobber, rolling her from the ring nonchalantly, still wincing, before snatching her championship belt from the official, hugging it maternally.

Joey Styles: Hmmm, that was certainly ungracious from our new Women’s Champion, wouldn’t you say, Coach?

Jonathan Coachman: Listen, Joey, if you looked as good as Mickie James and The Coach do, then maybe you’d understand just how annoying it is to have to share this word with ugly people … you and J.R.


~ Still clinging to her belt with every fibre of her being, Mickie, walking on her knees (because she’s weird right), shuffles over to the ropes, resting her head on them, batting her eyelids, asking for a microphone. Lillian Garcia obliges, and James, still on her knees, moves back slightly, raising the mic to her purty lips…

Mickie James: (crying, out of breath) Oh - oh my God… oh my God…

~ Shaking with the tears, Mickie points to various members of the audience ‘lovingly’…

Mickie James: (wipes her eyes, blubbing) S–Sorry. (Deep breaths) This moment… is so much bigger… than me. This–this moment is for Mae Young, Fabulous Moolah, Chyna… is for the women who stand beside me… *sniff* … and is for every nameless, faceless woman of this business who now h-has a chance… bec-because tonight a door has been opened…

~ The crowd boos this ridiculous, disgusting, disrespectful display, as Mickie ‘sobs’ some more, baring her perfectly white teeth in the process…

Mickie James: (gazing around) Th–thank you. I’m so honoured -- I’m so honoured and I thank the WWE for choosing me to be the Queen for which this blessing might flow, thank you -- I wanna’ thank -- I wanna’ than my agent, I wanna’ thank ma’ mom, who’s given me the strength to fight every single day to get what I wanna’ get, giving me the courage to dream that this dream might be happening and possible for me -- I love you mom sooo much.

~ J.R murmurs, “This is unbelievable”, as Mickie stammers.

Mickie James: And I… (wipes her eyes) I love ma’ daddy, ‘cause—

~ VICTORIA SUDDENLY COMES SPRINTING DOWN THE RAMP!

She gets a HUGE response from the crowd (probably because she just shut Mickie up ), making a beeline for the ring … but runs right into a wall of security, who grab the powerful, Diva, holding her firm as she struggles against them, screaming at the terrified looking Mickie, wide eyes, who clutches her title dearly…

…here comes TRISH STRATUS FROM BEHIND, NAILING VICKIE IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD, KNOCKING HER (accidentally?) INTO THE SECURITY GUARDS, lunging for the ring herself…

… only to be blocked off by the next wall of black-shirted, emotionless men, who wrestle her against the apron!! Horrified, Mickie falls back against the ropes, hand on her head.

Jim Ross: My God it’s–it’s bedlam out here! After that -- was it just me or was Mickie James channellin’ Halle Berry in that speech? -- “acceptance” from Ms. James, the two women she screwed last night want a piece of her!!

Jonathan Coachman: They’re just jealous!



*Backstage*

This time the scene is Kurt Angle-less, as from around the corner, pulls in a swish, silver Mercedes sports car with tinted windows, which pulls into the lot rather quickly, before parking across three disabled spaces, arrogantly askew.

Joey Styles: (Speaking over the top)Someone’s coming to join the party.

Jonathan Coachman: Ooh, I hope it’s Mr. Bischoff.

Jim Ross: It’s a Mercedes, Coach, an expensive looking Mercedes.

Jonathan Coachman: You’re right, J.R., Mr. Bischoff has a limo.

~ Coach’s prayers aren’t quite answered unfortunately as out from the driver’s seat, passenger seat, and three backstage seats hop Kenny, Mikey, Johnny, Mitch, and Nicky of The Spirit Squad, all looking rather dejected except for Mikey…

Mikey: I’m tellin’ ya’, fellas, this car-pool was a great idea–

Kenny: (Interrupting) Shut up and get the bags, Mike. We gotta’ find Mr. Bischoff right away–

???: (Off screen) HEY, DOANE!!!

Kenny: (Turning around angrily, removing his shades) WHAT!?

~ Kenny turns around…

…CRACK!! KURT ANGLE NAILS HIM WITH A CHAIR SHOT OFF THE SKULL!!!

The rest of The Squad jump around in surprise too as their ‘leader’ goes down like a ton o’ bricks, and Angle DRIVES THE CHAIR INTO MITCH’S GUT, before SMASHING IT DOWN ACROSS HIS BACK!! Johnny races in … but gets the chair THROWN RIGHT IN HIS FACE!! Angle then grabs hold of Nicky, pummelling him a few times, before HURLING HIM AGAINST THE SIDE OF THE MERCEDES!!

Ruthlessly, breathing “Son of a bitch” with every blow, the WWE Champion DRIVES Nicky against the car a bunch of times, BEFORE BOUNCING HIS HEAD OFF THE BONNET!! Walking around to the back, Kurt pulls open the trunk of the vehicle, lifts Nicky back up and tosses him inside. Waking back around, he pulls the groaning, damn-near unconscious Kenny, Mitch, and Johnny over in turn as well, piling them all inside the trunk … and closing the trunk.

Breathing heavily, eyes wild like an absolute psychopath, the Olympic Gold Medallist bangs the trunk a few times before turning around, eyes roving in search of his final victim: Mikey. The young cheerleader cowers over by the trashcans, holding his hands over his head in a proclamation of his ‘innocence’…

Mikey: I swear, I don’t have anything against bald people—

Kurt Angle: (Grabbing Mike by the collar) You and me are gonna’ have a little chat.


~ Mikey’s eyes open wide, as Angle snarls viciously and yanks the moronic Mondo up and out of our camera shot, to god knows where…


Joey Styles: (Still speaking over the top)OH MY GAWD!!! This is–this is carnage, total destruction! The WWE Champion has dismantled The Spirit Squad and he’s got Mikey all alone!!

Jonathan Coachman: I–I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!! WHAT’S WRONG WITH KURT ANGLE!?

Jim Ross: Oh man, Angle is out of control!! Angle has lost it!!







{Commercials}

*Video Plays*

Narrator:
It started out as a dream …

- RVD flying over the ropes into Jerry Lynn.

Narrator:
That became a reality …

- Mike Awesome powerbombing Masato Tanaka.

Narrator:
Last year the dream was relived …

- Tommy Dreamer crashing through the flaming table.

Narrator:
This year it will be reborn …

- Sandman brawling through the crowd.

Narrator:
This year ‘Extreme’ will live again …

- Taz suplexing some poor bastard.

Narrator:
This year sees the return …

- Sabu killing himself almost, as a voices echoes out.

“Of …”

- Quick, wild shots of Dreamer, Sandman, RVD, Funk, Taz, Sabu and Awesome.

“… ECW.”



“ECW One Night Stand, June 11th, 8/7CT, live on pay-per-view”

*End video*



*Ringside*

Jim Ross: (Footage of the attack plays)Just moments ago WWE Champion Kurt Angle from behind with a steel chair, as The Spirit Squad argued amongst themselves, it was Angle assaulting first Kenny, and then Nicky, Johnny, and Mitch too, Coach, with that chair—

Jonathan Coachman: What the hell has got into Kurt Angle!? What’s wrong with that man!? He’s got nothing to complain about! The Spirit Squad have done nothing to him! He just retained his WWE Championship for God’s sake!

Joey Styles: So, tonight Kurt Angle has assaulted The Spirit Squad, who were last seen in the trunk of… their car out back. (Footage still pays)Look at the destruction caused by Kurt Angle; and before they were, uhm, accosted by the champion, Kenny and Co. were on their way to find Eric Bischoff, but as far as we know, our General Manager hasn’t even arrived at the arena yet. What the hell is going on here!?


*Ringside*


***VIRTUAL VOODOO***


It takes a few moments but the crowd finally remembers what happened the last time this music played, a mere twenty-four hours ago, pouring heat down over the ominous, King Kong-esque drums, as Armando Alejandro Estrada leads his two huge savages down to the ring, both dressed identically in blue and green sarongs, their hair braided, physiques tattooed.

Jim Ross: Well it was barely twenty-four hours ago that that man right there, the enigmatic Cuban. Armando Estrada, introduced the world to this monstrous tandem–

Joey Styles: And he did it at the expense of our World Tag Team Champions, J.R! Those two–those two monsters destroyed Haas and Benjamin after their match last night!

Jonathan Coachman:
Hahaha, you got that right, fellas! Didn’t I always tell you to never count out Eric Bischoff? Didn’t I? Huh!? Well the same goes for Armando Alejandro Estrada. Just look at those two specimens he’s with.

Joey Styles:
No one’s going to disagree with you there, Coach, but one’s thing for certain, I fee sorry for the two young men who have the unenviable task of facing these two gargantuan beasts for the Raw debut tonight!


~ Estrada, dressed in a grey suit, along with his trademark hat, holds a microphone in hand, as he slowly removes his shades.

Armando Alejandro Estrada:Last night, at Backlash… (raises his hand into the air) … there was chaos, and there was destruction… but only two men were truly … UNSTOPPABLE!! Take a look at the footage, (turns, pointing to the titantron) roll the footage!!

*Video Plays*

- Video package plays. Typical ominous music over the top as Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin celebrate their retention last night.

Jim Ross: What a performance from these two kids; putting their differences aside, both pulin’ double-duty, but still managin’ to overcome the odds!!

- After the match, AAE arrives on the scene to debut “The Sons of Samoa”, sending them on down to the ring.

Joey Styles: “The Sons of Samoa”? WHAT THE HELL!?

Jim Ross: MY GOD … WOULD YOU LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THESE TWO ME -- MONSTERS!?

- Shots of the look of fear and confusion on the faces of members of the audience, and, more importantly, those of the World’s Greatest Tag Team.

Jonathan Coachman: (Stammering)I -- I’VE NEVER SEEN ANYONE LIKE THIS!!

- Shot of the WGTT rushing the ropes but being hammered right back down!

Jim Ross: AWW, JESUS --

Joey Styles: IT’S LIKE THEY WERE CHILDREN!!

- The two savages, going nuts, tossing the steps around as they enter the ring.

Jonathan Coachman: THEY’RE LIKE A COUPLE OF CRAZY MEN!!

- Savage #1 BREAKING SHELTON IN HALF WITH AN AWESOME SAMOAN DROP!

Jim Ross: FOR THE LOVE OF --

- Haas GETTING DRILLED by #2 WITH A NASTY SPINNING URINAGE SLAM!

Jim Ross:(Muffled crowd noise)-- GAWD!!

- Estrada applauding from the apron, smiling evilly.

Joey Styles: THIS IS A DAMN MUGGING!!

Jim Ross: (Over AAE’s voice)That man set this up! (Estrada’s face)He’s been settin’ this whole goddamn thing up for WEEKS, DAMMIT!!!

- Both monsters hitting SIMULTANEOUS REVERSE RUNNING CANNONBALLS in the corner, CRUSHING THE HEADS OF THE WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS!

Joey Styles: OH MY GAAAAWWDDDD!!!

Jonathan Coachman: This is -- this is hard to watch.

- Shot of Estrada breaking a cigar in twain.

Jim Ross: Now what the hell does that me --

- The savages hold up their taped, hideously large thumbs, tongues hanging down to their chins. BOTH Monsters LIFT HAAS AND BENJAMIN INTO THE AIR BY THEIR HEAD AND DRIVE THEIR THUMBS RIGHT THROUGH THEIR THROATS, DAMN NEAR DECAPITATING THEM!!

Jim Ross: OH -- OH NOOO!!!

- The clip of both men drilling the World’s Greatest Tag Team in the throat is replayed several times from several different angles, capturing the reactions of the female and young members of the audience; while Haas and Benjamin fly through the air like rag dolls.

Jim Ross:The World Tag Team Champions have just be DESTROYED by these two monsters!!

- Shot of both the monsters standing over their fallen victims with the tag team title belts in their mouths, looking close to animalistic, as Estrada applauds in between; whilst the camera flashes between shots of both Haas and Benjamin, unconscious, with blood trickling from the corner of their mouths, possibly suffering from internal bleeding.

Jonathan Coachman:Oh my -- I know I’ve said some pretty mean things about Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin in the past, but I -- I had nothing to do with this, guys.

- Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin being carried out of the ring on stretchers; then being loaded into an ambulance.

Jim Ross:(Echoing)This has the fingerprints of that damn Eric Bischoff all over it. I mean, just take a look at who’s out here “handlin’” these two monsters -- it’s Bischoff’s puppet, Estrada.

Joey Styles: … our World Tag Team Champions, Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin, after overcoming all the odds tonight, fighting two matches - one against each other - have been completely and utterly ANNINILATED by Armando Alejandro Estrada’s two savage -- savage assassins, in one of the most impactful debuts I have ever witnessed!

- AAE and Co. surveying the damage.

Jim Ross: Can we please get some HELP out here!?

- Repeated flashing shots of the brutal attack one more time.

Jim Ross: (Repeated, echoing)Can we please get some HELP out here!?

- We then fade out with the shot of the two savages standing over the World’s Greatest Tag Team, arms spread out wide, the tag team titles dangling from their mouths.

*End video*


The crowd is booing the hell out of the terrible trio, but AAE raises the microphone again…

Armando Alejandro Estrada: And those men’s names… (walks up beside one savage) are UMAGA, (steps over to the second) and SAMU! They’re unstoppable, and last night was just a -- como se dic’ -- taste of what The Sons of SAAAAAAMOA are capable of. Shelton Benjamin, Charlie Haas… they were just the first. But ju can rest assured… they won’t be the last.

~ Boos again for the animated Cuban, who is growing more and more agitated with every word, his hands waving all over the place.

Armando Alejandro Estrada: Therefore, the time has now come. Es’ now time for… (points to his team, grinning) these two men, UMAGA, SAMU… to become… Wooooorld Tag Team Champions!

~ Greater heat this time, as Umaga and Samu (as we now can call them) breathe heavily.

Armando Alejandro Estrada: Chaaaaarlie Haas, Shelton Benjamin, Lance Cade, Trevor Murdoch… amigos, ju are hereby being put… on notice, as of right now… (leans back) THE SAAAAAAMOAN BULLDOZERRR… {Umaga roars}) UUUUUUUUMAGAAA, and… the SAAAAAAMOAN CANNONBALL… {Samu slaps his chest} SSSSSSSSAMUUUofficiallychallenge ju… for the World, Tag, Team, Championship.

~ Lowering the mic, the egomaniacal Estrada raises the hands of his two weapons of mass destruction into the air, grinning all the way.

Jim Ross: You gotta’ be kiddin’ me!? Estrada thinks that his two savages -- I guess I’ll call ‘em Umaga and Samu from now on then -- can be Number One Contenders!?

Jonathan Coachman: And why not, J.R.!? Weren’t you paying attention during that video package -- in which I feature so prominently -- they took out the champs!?


3 - Tag Team Match
The Sons of Samoa w/Armando Alejandro Estrada vs. Chet Tyler & Hep Goodridge

It isn’t pretty, it isn’t 5* material, it isn’t PPV quality. But what it is, is the debut of something Monday Night Raw has been lacking for a long time: a new tag team. Since the disbanding of Kane & Big Show, there’s been a spot open for a monster team, and it looks like it’s been filled. From the opening bell the two poor bastard’s jobbers barely get time to breathe, as first UMAGA SAVATE KICKS ONE OF THEIR HEADS OFF, before SAMU LARIATS THE OTHER DOWN TO THE CANVAS!!

Dragging their prey into respective corners, the two monsters CONNECT WITH THE WRECKING BALL’S that they hit last night, CRUSHING THEIR OPPONENT’S SKULLS!! Dragging the carcasses up, the Sons of Samoa hold them in the air by the throat with one hand, as Estrada breaks his cigar in half, AND SAMU AND UMAGA RAM THEIR WICKED THUMBS RIGHT INTO THE JOBBERS’ THROATS, before intimidating the terrified official into counting the three.

Winners - Sons of Samoa via pinfall @ 1:57.

After the match, the referee tries to raise Umaga and Samu’s hands, but they quickly scare him from the ring, as AAE enters.

Joey Styles: Talk about impressive. The Sons Of Samoa -- Umaga and Samu now I guess, like you said, J.R. -- they just killed those two guys in no time at all!

Jonathan Coachman:
Well, allow me to be the first one to tell you this, fellas, but we’re hearing word now that that title match has already been signed for Vengeance. Uh-oh, eh?

Jim Ross:
That’s only two months away, Coach. Haas and Benjamin might not even be the tag team champions by then. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a team with as much size, power and speed as those monsters that Armando Estrada has put together. Haas and Benjamin will meet ‘em head-on though, you can count on that.


*Backstage*

All alone for the time being (but still carrying a bloody steel chair in one hand), Kurt Angle prowls along the corridors, his eyes still wide…

Jonathan Coachman: Hey, hey, would you look at this!? He’s still on the prowl. We need some Federal Marshals or something out here to arrest that psychotic S.O.B! He out of control! He’s a danger to everyone!

Joey Styles:
We’ve already said goodnight to Bischoff The Spirit Squad apparently, but our General Manager is still yet to arrive.

Jim Ross: Aw, man, this is getting way outta’ hand.


{Commercials}


Another vehicle pulls into the garage, this time it’s a red Corvette, which parks in a similarly lax and ridiculous manner as the Spirit Squad did earlier, as Carlito hobbles out gingerly, complete with neck brace and crutches, quickly followed by Chris Masters with the bags.

Carlito: (Hobbling towards the ring) Screw it, Carlito’s goin’ to the ring. Hurry up.

Chris Masters: Want me to bring the briefcase?

Carlito: Yeah, sure, why not.

~ ‘The Masterpiece’ quickly grabs the MITB case and hurries after his injured buddy…


*Ringside*

Jim Ross: Well Carlito and The Masterpiece are finally here and ya’ have to think that Kurt Angle could be – well he’s probably lookin’ for the pair of ‘em. Those two – those two idiots have no idea what’s in store for ‘em.

Jonathan Coachman: ‘Lito … ‘Lito, get back in the car, man, you’re injured.

Joey Styles:
I don’t think that’s going to happen, Coach. You saw the look on Carlito’s face, right? I think he’s still euphoric after managing to hold onto his Money in the Bank briefcase last night, I bet. Did you see the state of him though? That’s a guy who fell almost twenty-feet last night through our announce table. I guess when you’re buddies with Eric Bischoff the medical treatment is pretty good, eh, Coach? You sure recover quick from all those ass-kicking’s you get?

Jonathan Coachman: Shut up, Joey. Carlito’s double-tough, that’s all. So he fell through a table? So what!? He’s Mr. Money in the Bank, gu—


“I SPIT IN THE FACE OF PEOPLE WHO DON’T WANT TO BE COOL”



The Nationwide Arena erupts into boos, filling most of the building, except for a few partisan Caribbean Cool fans in the upper rafters, as Mr. Money in the Bank himself Carlito and “The Masterpiece” Chris Masters step out onto the Raw stage. With Masters holding his briefcase, CCC continues on down to the ring. Carly hobbles up the steel steps and enters the ring, before instructing ‘Piece to go grab him a microphone. The big lug obliges, holding it up to ‘Lito’s mouth as his music begins to die down.

Carlito: (Frowning at ‘Piece) Y’know, Carlito expected a little bit more from his Cabana… in… (Masters quickly whispers in his ear) oh, yeah, in CLEVELAND, OHIO!!

~ Heat for the terrible mistake. CCC is completely (and brilliantly) oblivious.

Carlito:
Carlito means, Carlito heard da’ (shakes his head) liiiitle ovation ‘dat you gave to those idiots for ‘dat Table Match earlier… {heat} but let Carlito ask you somethin’. Who beat Gre–Hurricane Helms last night at Backlash to hold onto… Chris? (Masters holds up the MITB briefcase) To hold onto ‘dis like Caribbean Cool!?

~ Boos from the crowd. ‘Lito tries to smile put has to stop due to his injured neck. Masters applauds away.

Carlito:
Lemme’ put it to ya’ like this, Carlito’s not mad, Carlito’s not gonna’ try an’ make you people feel any worse ‘den you already do, ‘cuz let’s face it, a Major League worst is all da’ Indian’s are gonna’ achieve ‘dis season {Cheap heat}. No, no, all Carlito wants is ‘de proper ovation for a superstar who went through hell las’ nigh—



***MEDAL***



OH NOOOOOZZZZZ~! Columbus BLOW THE ROOF, as for the first time tonight, despite having been kicking ass and taking names all night long, the man who RETAINED the WWE Championship in controversial fashion last night at Backlash, KURT ANGLE steps out onto the stage!! From the top of the ramp, Angle sizes up the two men in the ring, while Carlito looks confused as hell, whispering frantically in the ear of The Masterpiece, trying to ascertain just what the hell is going on here.

Roaring, Angle CHARGES down the ramp, and Carlito shoves Masters IN FRONT OF HIM…

…and it… is… on.

Angle slides straight into the ring, and Masters does as he is told, racing forwards with one of his finely chiselled arms, swinging for the fences, looking to take Kurt’s head off, but the WWE Champion ducks, grabs ‘Piece, and GERMAN SUPLEXES HIM OUT OF HIS BOOTS!

Tremendous cheers rain down on the ring as Masters flies half-way across the ring, and Angle turns towards the fleeing Carlito, who is already half-way through the ropes … but Kurt GRABS HIM, FLINGING HIM all the way to the outside, NECK BRACE AND ALL!!!

CCC writhes in pain down on the concrete, while Angle hops down after him, seething with intensity, yelling, “WHERE’S BISCHOFF, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?”

On his hands and knees, Mr. Money in the Bank tries desperately to get away, but he isn’t going anywhere, as Angle pounces on him, and THE COACH MAKES A BREAK FOR IT!

There is some laughter as Coach abandons his commentary duties and BOLTS PAST THE MELEE, BACK UP THE RAMP! Angle doesn’t even notice him, instead grabbing hold of Carly, rushing forward, and TOSSING HIM INTO THE CROWD HEAD-FIRST! Back in the ring, Masters starts to regain his senses and quickly rushes out after them.

Soon enough, ‘Piece dives over the barricade too, as ANGLE HAMMERS CARLITO ALL THE WAY THROUGH THE MASSES, the screams and cheers rumbling all through the Nationwide Arena, as the three men disappear higher and higher until the fight seems to take them back out through one of the fire escapes…


Joey Styles: OH MY GAWD!!!

Jim Ross: KURT ANGLE IS BEATING THE HELL OUT OF CARLITO AND THE MASTERPIECE, JUST LIKE HE DID THE SPIRIT SQUAD EARLIER TONIGHT!!!

Joey Styles: WHERE THE – WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY GOING!?







{Commercials}


Jim Ross: Ladies and gentlemen, this past Sunday, we thought all our questions would be answered, but instead the mystery surrounding ‘The Nature Boy’ Ric Flair only grew more intense. Folks, stay where you are, ’cause we’re gonna show you exactly what went down last night at Backlash when we were reintroduced to not only a Legend, but also, a Legend Killer. You’ll see what I mean…

*Video Plays*


- We return to Backlash last night, with the video starting out very somber, showing Ric Flair, emotional, but still suited and booted to the max, making his way to the ring, waving and blowing kisses to all of his adoring fans, who we get individual shots of.


Ric Flair:
it’s been a LONG road getting’ to this point I can tell ya. But it feels DAMN good to have finally made it.

- Flair’s face is filled with emotion as he looks around the arena sadly, inter-cutting with shots of the nervous, anxious faces watching him.

Ric Flair: From the bottom of my heart, (looking up) I wanna thank you for everything.

- From Flair’s soliloquy we get a few flashing shots of exactly what Naitch means, as we travel back in time, seeing clips of him being adored (and hated) in various companies and decades around the world.

Ric Flair:
But it can’t last forever. I gotta tell ya, that THE NAITCH … is only flesh and blood. You punch me, I FAAAALLLLL! You cut me, I BLEEEED! And I wrestle for 35 years … I gotta spend some time with my family. I THINK, or at least I’d like to think that I’ve earned your respect and your trust, enough so that when I tell ya what I’m about to say, you won’t hate me.

- Shot of even J.R looking apprehensive, fearing the next words from Flair’s mouth, as he hangs his head.

Ric Flair: I always wanted to go out on top, and at WrestleMania I think I ensured that. SO (trying to smile) for the first time in my career … I am gonna follow through with somethin’ I’d planned a LONG time ago … and I’m here to announce to you all … that I…

- Clips from the career of the great man, holding his numerous World Titles, beating opponent after opponent in the most entertaining matches.

Ric Flair:…am … RETIRING … from the sport of professional wrestling.

- Shot of the horror on everyone, including performer’s, faces. The mood changes drastically though, as Flair’s former protégé, Randy Orton, makes his return
.

Randy Orton:I came out here looking for the greatest wrestler to ever lace up… to ever lace a pair of boots, a man who taught me, me, Randy Orton, the youngest Worlds Champion IN, HISTORY, everything I know. I came out here looking -- looking for “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair, you might’ve heard of him?

Ric Flair:
(Echoing)I’ve given this a lot of thought. I’ve been over it over and over again in my mind … with my wife … with my kids … with my friends … my peers … everyone … ‘til I -- well, ‘til I reached this point
.

Randy Orton:
but instead all I found was the greatest COWARDLY SON, OF, A, BITCH to ever dare to step foot in a wrestling ring!!

- Orton drawing the ire of the fans, his peers, and Flair, but persisting.

Randy Orton:No, no, I was looking for the man I used to run with when I… when I first entered this business, the man who didn’t take crap from ANYBODY, who did what he wanted, when he wanted.

- Flair and Orton face to face over the years.

Randy Orton:The guy who led me, who taught me everything there was to know in this business, a man with more BALLS than a THOUSAND JBL’S… and yet -- and yet, here you stand, telling the world… (right in Ric’s face) … that you’re letting that Wall Street punk run you out of the game.

- Flashback to WrestleMania XXII and its build, with Flair going up against one of the fiercest wrestling villains of the modern era, John “Bradshaw” Layfield, clashing with him at the Royal Rumble, Saturday Night’s Event, and, ultimately, WrestleMania, where he defeats the self-proclaimed “Wrestling God”.

Randy Orton:
you once told me, Ric, you once told me, told me, Dave, and Hunter, that you would never, ever retire while there was still a breath left in you. You told us that so long as you felt Number Seventeen was still only just ‘round the corner … you’d keep on “walkin’ that aisle”. What happened to you? What happened … (snarling) … to that “Nature Boy”?

- The Evolution Era. Clips play, highlighting exactly what TLK is getting at, showcasing Flair’s time spent mentoring the present and future of this business in Triple H, Batista, and, of course, Randy Orton.

Ric Flair: D’ya think I was JOKIN’ back in ’75 when I broke my damn back!? D’ya think I was JOKIN’ when Terry Funk threw me upside my head through a TABLE!? Was I LAUGHIN’, when TRIPLE H, a man I thought -- you thought -- was my best friend, when he BUSTED me in the head OVER AND OVER AGAIN with a SLEDGEHAMMER JUST SIX MONTHS AGO!?

- This time we see Flair’s side of the argument, as we travel back to 1989, as Terry Funk ANNIHILATES Naitch at WrestleWar.


- The video moves forward, we see Flair being bloodied inside a Steel Cage, first by the man himself, Randy Orton, and then by his supposed closest friend, Triple H, who wields “that damn hammer” against Ric.

- Flair and Orton go eye to eye, with the veteran passionately showing the youngster every scar on his 57-year old body.

Randy Orton: That might -- might work on the wife and kids, Ric -- after all, I should know, I’ve met them. It might work on these … people here, but it’s not gonna’ work on me. You’re … (prodding Slick) … you’re walking away ‘cause this business with JBL has got you so scared of not just him, but all of this “New Blood” coming through -- you want to bow out now, quietly, slip out the back door before anyone knows you’re gone … ‘cause you’re scared to DEATH, Naitch … of being pushed aside and forgotten.


It won’t mean a thing if you walk away ‘cause of Bradshaw.

- Flair and Orton face to face later that night…

Ric Flair:
“PUSHED ASIDE?!” (The jacket comes off) ARE YOU KIDDIN’ ME!? (Down goes the jacket) You think YOU or any ONE of those snot-nosed PUNKS sittin’ in the back can hold a candle to THE NATURE BOY!? (Bounces off the ropes) The ONE … the ONLY … Stylin’ and WOOOOO, profilin’ … wheelin’, dealin’ SON OF A GUN!? (Stops cold in Orton’s face) NO! NO! NO CHANCE!!!

- Shots of the various young superstars Orton is referring to, from Carlito to Charlie Haas, Kenny to Shelton Benjamin, Chris Masters, Gregory Helms, etc., all gunning for Ric Flair’s spot near the top of the Raw roster, with Naitch doing his best to fight them all off.

Randy Orton:You might be old, Slick … but you aren’t that old … yet. You heard what I said. If you don’t want people doubting just how good you really are … what kind of man ‘The Nature Boy’ really is, Naitch … then I’d think twice about retiring. You know me about as well as anyone, Ric, and you should know -- you should know that I tend to be much more to the point. Kinda’ like this. (Right in Flair’s face) YOU, RIC FLAIR, ARE PATHETIC!!!

- Various clips of fans shitting all over TLK.

Randy Orton:You listen to me -- you listen to me good. You used to be the best damn wrestler to EVER step in to a wrestling ring. PERIOD! I’m just saying it -- I’m not just throwing it out there like some guys. I MEAN IT! I mean it from the very bottom … of my heart, Ric. I … (shakes his head) … I guess I should’ve figured it out … I mean, think about it, you’ve always been a damn egomaniac, it’s in your NATURE to want to be the best, and all that time in Evolution, in your heart … you knew you’d never, ever … been as good … as me.

- More clips, this time focusing on the career of Young Randall, from his beginnings in Evolution to his World Heavyweight Title win, feud with The Undertaker, The McMahons etc.

Randy Orton:it BREAKS, MY, HEART to see you throwing it all away like this, Ric. It really does. It breaks my heart. Just in the last few months, MONTHS, you’ve gone up against some of the very BEST in the game right now… Money in the Bank, Carlito … former-WWE Champion, JBL… and last Fall, The Cerebral Assassin, The King Of Kings, the guy you so often -- and wrongly -- refer to as the best in the business today … my other mentor… Triple H.

- Clips of Flair defeating Carlito for the Intercontinental Championship at Unforgiven in 2005, besting the Cerebral Assassin in a bloody Steel Cage Match at Taboo Tuesday, and then going toe to toe with The Game in a Last Man Standing Match at Survivor Series.

- Shot of Orton and Flair staring into one another’s eyes, emotions clearly running wild through both of their bodies…

Ric Flair:I was quit when I came out here, Randy…

Randy Orton:
How about it then, Naitch? I’m offering you the opportunity of a lifetime in the twilight of your career. You shut the doubters, the naysayers, up -- shut them up once and for all? All the doubters, all the haters? You make it … one, LAST -- if you want it to be -- glorious run at the side of greatness, at the top of the mountain, with Number… Seven, teen achieved vicariously through me? Whaddya’ say?

Ric Flair:
… I’m twice as quit now.

- Final shot of Flair brushing past Orton, leaving both he and the crowd in shock, and, for the first time in a long time, being booed roundly…


*End video*



Jim Ross: We hope to have some answers soon. But…(footage plays)just moments ago Mr. Money in the Bank, Carlito, was interrupted… by KURT ANGLE!

Joey Styles: And just as Angle had destroyed the whole of The Spirit Squad earlier tonight, our WWE Champion had one thing and one thing only on his mind, but just what that is, we’re still waiting to find out!

Jim Ross: Where the hell did Coach go, Joey, that’s what I wanna’ know!?


*Ringside*

4 - Tag Team Match
The Basham Brothers vs. Val Venis & Viscera

Despite the introduction of Umaga and Samu, there’s just no getting away from the weak state of Raw’s tag team division, and Doug & Danny continue their dual-brand run (thanks to JBL’s wallet) with a simple squash victory over V2 -- yeah, some great matches on this show () -- with the Double Brain Damage to Val.

Winners - The Basham Brothers via pinfall @ 2:48.

Jim Ross: The Basham’s pick up the win here tonight, continuing their rather bizarre hunt to win both the WWE and World Tag Team titles.

Joey Styles: That’s right, but, J.R., I just don’t know how this night could get any more explosive, but it’s going to after this next commercial.



*Backstage - Split Screen*

Gingerly putting the finishing touches to his ring attire, Shelton Benjamin winces as the camera closes in on his heavily taped ribs, whilst Charlie Haas looks on with a concerned expression, not looking too great either.


~ On the other side, the new contenders to the tag title, Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch stroll down the hallway, lookin’ mean, lookin’ lean, and lookin’ confident.

Jim Ross: You’re exactly right, Joey. Another match signed by Eric Bischoff, this one made last week; Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas, after wrestling for nearly an hour last night, after being destroyed by Estrada’s new team, must put their World Tag Team Titles on the line against the hottest team of 2006, NEXT!

{Commercials}


For the umpteenth time tonight we are amongst the (badly) parked cars of WWE personnel, but this time isn’t Kurt Angle or any of Bischoff’s allies, but Jonathan Coachman who is pacing nervously, gabbling on his cell phone…

Jonathan Coachman: Yeah? (…) I understand that, Mr. Bischoff (…) You in a tunnel? (…) Just use the driver the company sent next time (…) Look, I have no idea where-

~ A few backstage workers wander past, and Coach stops, smiling falsely at them.

Jonathan Coachman: (Smiling) ‘Sup? (Back into phone) Yeah (…) no one (…) (winces) (…) I know that, you don’t have to worry about that, sir, I got Torrie to take care of him (…) yeah, he’s still here too (…) I’ll be here waiting (…) hurry up.

~ Coach hangs up, closing his phone and tucking it away in his top pocket. He runs his hand over his smooth head before beginning the waiting game once again.


*Ringside*

Jim Ross: Well that son of a -- what the hell is Coach doing backstage calling people when he’s supposed to be out here doin’ his job with us? I heard him use the name “Mr. Bischoff”, so I assume our ‘boss’ is finally gonna show his face tonight.

Joey Styles: I don’t know if that’s such a good idea with Kurt Angle still around, J.R.


***WRECKIN’ BALL***


Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch, collectively known as The Redneck Wrecking Crew, swagger down the ramp toward the ring. Murdoch wears his eighties wrestling robe, while Cade sports his usual cowboy attire. The two big roughnecks clamber into the ring, getting roundly booed by the sold-out crowd.

Joey Styles: Has there been a better team in the WWE in 2006? The likes of MNM, The Hooligans, and the WWE Tag Team Champions The Bluebloods have all been on fire this year over on SmackDown, but they’ve all tasted defeat; just like The Spirit Squad, and just like our own World Tag Team Champions. These two boys … haven’t.

Jim Ross: That’s exactly right, Joey. We can sugar-coat it any way we like, but the fact remains, Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch, former tag team champions themselves, haven’t lost a single tag team bout all year; that’s over five months now, folks.

***WORLD’S GREATEST***


Columbus erupts with a great response for our World Tag Team Champions, as first Charlie Haas, and then the Intercontinental Champion Shelton Benjamin, The World’s Greatest Tag Team, hobble out onto the stage gingerly, still looking all beat up after last night’s exertions at Backlash.

Jim Ross: Another fantastic response for the World Tag Team Champions here in Columbus, just like they’ve been gettin’ everywhere all year, but Haas and Benjamin look in a bad, bad way after what they suffered last night at Backlash.

Joey Styles: I don’t know what we expected, J.R; last night Haas and Benjamin beat the hell out of each other for twenty minutes in a bonafide classic for the Intercontinental Title, before facing FIVE men in their tag team title defence, barely escaping that one.

Jim Ross: And how can we forget what went down after that match?

Joey Styles: We can’t frankly. Armando Alejandro Estrada’s new … monstrous team, “The Sons Of Samoa”, as he calls them, arrived and decimated the World’s Greatest Tag Team in a major statement of intent to not only the tag division, but the locker room as a whole.

~ Charlie Haas jumps up onto the apron, telling Cade & Murdoch to “Get the hell back”, as Lillian Garcia takes the spotlight for the second time tonight.

Lillian Garcia: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for THE WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS!! {Good pop} Introducing first, the challengers … weighing in tonight at a combined weight of 502 pounds … the team of LANCE CADE … TREVOR MURDOCH … THE REDNECK WRECKING CREW!!

~ More boos for The RWC, as ol’ Murdoch continues to antagonise the crowd with his ‘in your face’ antics, screaming at them to “Shut up!”

Lillian Garcia: Their opponents … wrestling tonight at a combined weight of 497 pounds … they are the current reigning and defending WOOOORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS … CHARLIE HAAS, AND THE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIOOOON SHELTON BENJAMIN … THE WOOOORLD’S GREATEST TAG TEAM!!

~ Great pop for the two All Americans, as Benjamin pumps his fist to the crowd, and Haas … doesn’t. Lillian makes a swift exit, allowing the official to hold the belts up high, before handing them to the outside, and calling for the bell.

Joey Styles: Somehow, I don’t think we’ll be seeing a handshake.

5 - Main Event; World Tag Team Championship Match
The World’s Greatest Tag Team defend against The Redneck Wrecking Crew


Despite their numerous ailments, the plucky and popular tag team champions walk to the centre of the ring … where LANCE CADE LAYS INTO SHELTON BENJAMIN IMMEDIATELY, hammering him with right hands, as the referee gets Charlie Haas and Trevor Murdoch back to their respective corners. Cade presses the advantage, sending the Intercontinental Champion into the ropes a couple of times, each time taking Shelton’s head over with a big Texas-style clothesline. Going for another one, this time Benji ducks it, stops, goes for a kick -- but Lance catches his foot, spins him -- DRAGON WHIP TO CADE!! Shelton tries to hit the ropes again -- CHEAP SHOT FROM MURDOCH, and Cade suplexes Benji down.

Getting the tag, Trevor Murdoch comes in all guns blazing, sending the shaken Benjamin into the ropes, catching him, and SLAMMING him down with a big powerslam, before quickly bringing Big Lance back in. Cade puts the boots to Shelton once again, before hurling him into the ropes and catching him with a knee to the ribs on the way back, making him flip!! The rugged Texan tries it again, but Benji reverse the Irish Whip, throws a clothesline -- only for Cade to roll beneath it, turn–

- HE CATCHES SHELTON’S FOOT -- BUT EATS AN ENZIGUIRI FOR HIS TROUBLES!!

Much to the delight of the crowd, both men go down, and the Intercontinental Champions crawls towards his corner, just managing to MAKE THE TAG, bringing in Charlie Haas.

Haas storms into the ring like a man possessed, assaulting Cade with right hands, backing him right across the ring into the ropes, before shooting him off and hitting a beautiful dropkick right on the button for a near fall!! Pressing on, Haas goes for another whip -- but Big Lance ducks beneath it, boots Charlie in the gut and goes for his own -- but Haas reverses again, and Cade hits the ropes, and HAAS TAKES HIM OVERHEAD WITH A MONSTROUS OWEN HART BELLY-TO-BELLY THROW/SUPLEX!! Another near fall, but Haas isn’t disheartened, continuing to hammer away. He goes for the Irish Whip -- Cade reverses it, sending Haas into Murdoch, who goes for a cheap shot -- Charlie blocks it, and KNOCKS TREVOR DOWN!! Haas turns -- RIGHT INTO A BIG BOOT FROM CADE!!

As Cade makes the cover, Benjamin is swiftly into the ring to break it up, before rather foolish and hot headedly charging across the ring, blindsiding Murdoch, knocking him down to the floor. Hearing the cheers of the crowd, Shelton hits the ropes, races ahead, leaps up, FLYING OVER THE TOP ROPE WITH HIS SOMERSAULT PLANCHA -- BUT MURDOCH MOVES, AND BENJI SPLATS SPINE AND RIBS FIRST ON THE UNFORGIVING FLOOR!!! As the sickening sight sinks in, Cade delivers a backbreaker to Haas, scoring a near fall.

As the EMT’s and various referees rush down to check on the fallen Intercontinental Champion, Cade continues to work over Haas, hitting a scoop slam, dropping a couple of elbows on him, choking him out in the corner, before manoeuvring him over to the RWC corner, tagging in Murdoch. As Big Lance holds Charlie up, Murdoch takes a free shot on one half of the tag team champions, wearing him out against the ropes. Meanwhile, Shelton Benjamin is helped back up the ramp by the medical personnel, seemingly out of this match.

Now defending his titles without his partner, Charlie Haas is fairly helpless, as Trevor Murdoch continues to do damage to him. Distracted by arguing with the official, Murdoch allows Haas to make a brief come back with a flurry of right hands, before he goes for the Irish Whip -- Murdoch reverses it, and Haas hits the ropes -- KNEE TO THE BACK FROM CADE, and a BIG LARIAT from Murdoch, turning Haas inside out! Another tag to Big Lance, and in he comes, immediately putting the boots to Charlie.

Cade beats the crap out of the All-American in the corner for a while, before delivering a gorgeous Vertical Suplex for another near fall, and then going right back to the punishment in the corner. He tries to draw blood from Haas’ muscular chest with some nasty sounding knife edge chops.

The referee Mike Chioda gets in Cade’s face, telling him to knock it off, causing the Redneck to turn his attention from Haas momentarily. The former Ceton Hall resident explodes out of the corner with right hands and even a few European Uppercuts, getting all fired up, before going for the big knockout punch -- but Cade ducks, lifts Haas up, DRILLING HIM DOWN INTO THE CANVAS WITH HIS SITOUT SPINEBUSTER!!! It must be over!!

1...

2...

NO!!!

Haas kicks out, and Cade is absolutely livid, berating Chioda and stomping away on Haas.

Angrily, Cade drags Haas back up, delivers a scoop slam, before running his finger across his throat and heading up top. After balancing himself on the top rope, CADE SOARS OFF WITH HIS FLYING ELBOW DROP - AND HITS IT!! After rolling around clutching his elbow for a few moments, Cade finally makes the cover, hooking the far leg!

1...

2...

NO!!

Haas kicks out again, and Cade is in shock.

Frustrated, Cade tags out, bringing in the incomparable Trevor Murdoch, who immediately drags Haas back up, applies the Full Nelson, before lifting him up, DRIVING him down into the mat with an impressive looking Full Nelson Slam. He gets another two count, and so he picks Haas up, sends him off into the ropes with an Irish Whip, throws a clothesline -- but Haas ducks, stops, and delivers a big right hand of his own!

After rocking Murdoch with a few right hands, Haas quickly turns, hits the ropes, races back -- boot to the gut from Murdoch, sticks Haas between his legs, GOING FOR HIS VERSION OF THE CANADIAN DESTROYER -- but Haas FLIPS OVER, LANDING ON HIS FEET in a display of incredible athleticism, grabs Murdoch around the waist, BRINGING THE BIG REDNECK CRASHING OVER WITH HIS FIRST GERMAN SUPLEX OF THE NIGHT!!

The crowd EXLODES, but both men are down, with Haas completely worn down after the beating he’s sustained thus far in the contest, and Murdoch woozy after that German. There is no one for Haas to crawl to, but Murdoch makes it to his corner, bringing Cade back in. Big Lance grabs Haas, goes for the Irish Whip – Haas reverses it, looking for his own – Cade reverses it, bringing Haas back -- Haas rolls through, wraps the arm, CONNECTING WITH AN EXPLODER SUPLEX TO CADE!! Raging, Haas jumps right back up, grabbing Murdoch on the apron and ROCKING him with a stiff European Uppercut, knocking him down to the floor! Haas turns back around and Cade is back up, laying into the tag champion with more hard right hands.

Backing Haas into the ropes, Cade goes for the Irish Whip – but Charlie reverses, going behind, CONNECTING WITH A GERMAN SUPLEX - THIS TIME WITH A BRIDGE!! 1 … 2 … MURDOCH PULLS HAAS OUT OF THE RING!!! Murdoch takes a swing, LOOKING TO TAKE HAAS’ HEAD OFF WITH THE DAMN RING BELL -- but Haas ducks, boots Trevor in the gut, catches the falling bell, AND SMASHES THE RING BELL RIGHT BETWEEN MURDOCH’S EYES!!! Mike Chioda lets it go () thankfully, as Haas slides back inside.

Back in the ring, Haas gets up a full head of steam, and RUNS RIGHT INTO A VICIOUS LARIAT FROM LANCE CADE, DAMN NEAR TAKING HAAS’ HEAD OFF!!! Charlie looks unconscious as Cade makes a confident cover.

1...

2...

NO!!

HAAS KICKS OUT AGAIN!!

With the crowd going wild, Cade throws a wonderful hissy fit, kicking the ropes and grabbing the referee by the shirt, before finally regaining his sense. Lifting Haas up, he goes for the Irish Whip -- but Haas reverses it once more, and Cade comes flying back - Haas catches him, backs up, AND HITS A BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX, TAKING CADE OVER THE TOP ROPE TO THE FLOOR BELOW!!!

Haas falls back down, Cade writhes, and the crowd BLOWS THE ROOF, as Shelton Benjamin actually comes hobbling back down the ramp, shoving the EMT’s away. Left arm wrapped around his tortured ribs, the Intercontinental Champion grits his teeth with determination, as he hobbles towards the dazed Lance Cade. Grabbing the Texan by the arm, Benji pulls back, SENDING CADE CRASHING INTO THE STEEL STEPS SHOULDER-FIRST!!

Still wincing, Shelton rolls Cade back into the ring, before collapsing back down to the floor. Haas hits Cade with a few right hands, before going for the Irish Whip – it’s reversed and Haas hits the ropes, as Cade lowers his head -- KICK TO THE FACE FROM HAAS!! Cade staggers backwards, BEFORE SUDDENLY RACING FORWARDS WITH A LARIAT -- DUCKED BY CHARLIE, GOES BEHIND, GRABS THE WAIST, LIFTS CADE UP, CONNECTING WITH A HUGE GERMAN SUPLEX - WITH A BRIDGE!!!

1...

{Murdoch starts to enter the ring}

2...

{Murdoch tries to break it up}

THREE!!!!!

Winners - World’s Greatest Tag Team via pinfall @ 10:29. Haas & Benjamin retain the World Tag Team Titles.

The bell rings; Lance Cade slumps to his side in agony and disappointment, while the crowd roars with delight, and Haas falls backwards clutching his ribs.

Outside the ring, Trevor Murdoch sits against the ring apron holding his head in pain, as Cade watches on, mortified, the referee hand all three title belts (including the I.C one) to Benjamin, who agonizingly rolls under the bottom rope. Both Benjamin and the official help a dazed (very dazed) Charlie Haas back up to his feet, each taking an arm and helping the (possibly concussed) superstar back up.

Jim Ross: Ba’ God, I don’t believe it; comin’ in to this match with busted ribs, with busted backs, with throats damn near crushed just last night, and somehow, someway, Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin have stuck it to Eric Bischoff once again!

Joey Styles: Well, as Coach always says, “Whatever gets the job done?” But you’re right about one thing tonight, J.R., Cade & Murdoch dominated the tag champions tonight.


~ Outside by the announce table, Cade and Murdoch finally make it back up to their feet -- not through being unable to do so, but simply through shock -- and stand, hands on hips, just gazing down at the floor dejectedly having suffered their first tag team loss of 2006; but strangely enough, not taking it out on each other.

Back inside the ring, Shelton, still wincing, quickly pulls Haas around from where he was looking, and goes to shake his friend’s hand again…


…WHAM!!! UMAGA AND SAMU ATTACK THE TAG CHAMPS FROM BEHIND, KNOCKING THEM DOWN!!!

The crowd ERUPTS into heat, as the Samoan savages, Raw’s newest superstars, under the direction of the ever present Armando Alejandro Estrada, waste little time. Reaching down, ‘Mags grabs hold of Haas by the hair, dragging him back up, whilst Samu does the same with Benjamin. The thumbs go up, the cigar breaks, and THE SONS OF SAMOA SIMULTANEOUSLY DECAPITATE THE WORLD’S GREATEST TAG TEAM WITH MONSTROUS SPIKES INTO THE THROAT!!!
For the second time in 48-hours, Haas and Benjamin are laid out by these debuting monsters; with Estrada posing in between his talent above the prone bodies of the champions, once again holding all the gold, as we fade out...

{Commercials}


A video package plays very similar to earlier ones, recapping the sinister events of last week, as The Big Show and Paul Bearer kidnap, hold hostage, and assault Dustin Rhodes and Maria Kanellis, making RVD choose between them.

***MEDAL***


The Nationwide Arena ERUPTS, matching the loudest ovation of the night so far. With his Olympic Gold Medals still swaying around his muscular neck, eyes bulging from his head, 2x4 in his left hand, face red with fury, ‘The Wrestling Machine’ and WWE Champion Kurt Angle storms straight down the ramp to the ring.

Jim Ross: WELL HERE WE GO!!! I got a feelin’ that business just picked up here on Monday Night Raw! These fans here in Columbus … have ERUPTED!

Joey Styles: He’s been on a rampage all night long -- involved in perhaps the most controversial endings to a WWE title match in history, Kurt Angle!


Striding into the ring, Kurt doesn’t do his patented spin; instead just marching right across the ring and snatching a mic from Lillian Garcia. As the crowd roars for the Olympian, he waits, his music fading in the background, allowing his supporters to quieten down, before bringing the mic up to his trembling lips…

Kurt Angle:(Throws head up, eyes shut) UUUUUUAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGHHHHHHH!!!!

~ WOW~! The crowd doesn’t know what the hell to do, seeing the pure rage just pouring out of their Olympic Hero; eyes closed, shaking all over…

Kurt Angle: I … (breathing loudly, down the mic) I just needed to get that off my chest.


~ “ANGLE!” chants rip through the building en masse, prompting at least one of the WWE Champion’s eyes to squint open, as he remains, head pulled back up at the lights.

Kurt Angle: And it felt … (licks his lips) … it felt pretty, damn, good.

~ Both eyes of The Wrestling Machine slowly, gradually open, he rolls his neck from side-to-side, before bending his mouth over the stick one more time.

Kurt Angle: After last night … (grimaces, baring his teeth) … after the hell I went through last night, ANYTHING I did tonight was gonna’ be an improvement.

~ The camera focuses in on Angle’s visibly tightening grip.

Kurt Angle: I had John Cena -- (looks up quicker than a hiccup) I HAD JOHN CENA BEAT!! I don’t need short-cuts, I don’t WANT tainted wins; I’M A FREAKIN’ OLYMPIC GOLD MEDALLIST!!!

~ BIG pop from the crowd, with Angle starting to come alive before their very eyes.

Kurt Angle: (Holding up one of his gold medals, stained in blood) Do you know what this is? This is everything to me. This is my life, my love… my passion. And -- (insane look) and Shawn Michaels? YouHUMILIATED ME LAST NIGHT, YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!

~ The majority of the crowd start a “MICHAELS SUCKS!” chant, though the Kliq is still there.

Kurt Angle: (Eyes narrowed) … BIG mistake.

~ Huge pop from the audience.

Kurt Angle: I’ve know, Michaels -- (leering look) I’ve known all along what a spineless prick you were, so am I surprised your ass is hiding away? Not, at, all.


~ Angle grits his teeth with anger.

Kurt Angle: You thought I wouldn’t work it out, Michaels? You thought I wouldn’t realise who let you into the building last night, and who I have to go through to get to you!?

~ Taking a step towards the ropes nearest the entrance ramp, Angle holds up the 2x4 in his hand, gazing at it, almost trance-like.

Kurt Angle: The Spirit Squad? Carlito? Masters? Coach? (Shakes his head) Those stupid S.O.B’s didn’t know what was good for ‘em… so I put their asses out with the trash.

~ GREAT response from Ohio, with Kurt nodding gently.

Kurt Angle: So that leaves just… (points with the 2x4) one more rat sat there on his ass in the back, who’s seen me pick apart his little “team” one, by, one… and ya know somethin’… Eric? If you don’t give me what I want…I’m gonna keep, on, goin’.

~ Angle pauses, eyes still fixed straight ahead.

Kurt Angle: Oh, I know – I know you think you can hide behind that women beater…

~ “BIG SHOW SUCKS!” “BIG SHOW SUCKS!” “BIG SHOW SUCKS!” rings out from half of the audience, but the other half seems to just be engrossed with the champ’s speech.

Kurt Angle: Well, (takes a step toward the camera), I’m a little different to Van Dam, so why don’t you tell ‘em to waddle out here … and try beating up … (points) me?

~ The crowd cheers as Angle gives the hard camera a face-full.

Kurt Angle: Or do you only fancy your chances when you’ve got the rest of your little BITCHES backing you up!?

~ OH!; The crowd absolutely LOVES this, cheering wildly for the WWE Champion.

Kurt Angle: ‘Cause the way I see it, Bischoff, I’M THE WWE CHAMPION! I’M NOT GOIN’ ANYWHERE!! You can either bring Shawn Michaels out here on a stretcher… or you can tell me where his ass is at. Either way… (pounds his fist) HE’S MINE!!

~ Boiling with intensity, Angle turns to face the stage.

Kurt Angle: So … (points) I’m here. Now it’s (up the ramp) your turn…

~ Angle having said his piece apparently, chucks his mic down to the canvas, turns, and begins pacing up and time predatorily as the crowd chants his name…







“WELLLLLL … IT’S THE BIG SHOW”


Switching from the booming cheers, the Nationwide Arena releases a barrage of RELENTLESS HEAT, while Angle stops his pacing to fix his gaze on the stage, for the arrival of the behemoth, The Big Show, flanked as always by the grotesque, pungent Paul Bearer, who brings that burlap sack and a mic with him.

Joey Styles: Mind if I steal a line, J.R.? I think “business has picked up!!!”

Jim Ross:
Well, there he is, ladies and gentlemen: the largest athlete in the world, along with his manager, the repugnant Paul Bearer, the two men who just seven days ago kidnapped and did God knows what to poor Maria; the men who just twenty-four hours ago, banished “Mr. Monday Night” Rob Van Dam from the WWE. This is intense.

Joey Styles:
These two men have been on a collision course all, night, long.


‘Show, smirking, lazily removes his suit jacket, rolling up his shirt-sleeves in preparation for a war, as his music slowly dies down, and the rotund one decides to say his bit, bringing up the stick…

Paul Bearer: (Smirking) Good evenin’, Mr. An—

~ “ASSHOLE!” ASSHOLE!” ASSHOLE!” “ASSHOLE!” “ASSHOLE!” The crowd cuts the sinister human being off before he can even get going, drawing a hideous, distorted, petulant scowl from the obese individual, and a rather withering look from the monster at his side.

Paul Bearer: No, no, (holds up his finger) see a’ take exception to what you all are chantin’ seein’ as ma’ giant an’ a’ have done nothin’ but be nice ta’ you people.

~ The crowd boos loudly, while Big Show nods in head in agreement with his associate, ignoring the simmering Gold Medallist for the moment.

Paul Bearer: Yeeees. (Turning back to Angle) Now, as a’ was sayin’ before bein’ so ruuuudely inta’rupted, good evenin’, Mr. Angle. Lemme’ be the first ta’ say -- even though you don’t have it with ya’ -- congratulations on retainin’ the Dubya-Dubya-E tatle’.

~ A rather confused outbreak of applause runs through the arena, as Bearer, tucking the mic under his pudgy arm for a moment, leads the clapping, along with ‘Show, smiling away at the WWE Champion in the ring. Angle though, continues to mouth, “Bullshit” over and over again, muttering to himself.

Paul Bearer:
(Gazing up at ‘Show) Whaddya’ think, king?

The Big Show: (Leaning down) Impressive, Kurtvery impressive.

~ Angle continues to shake with rage, as a smirking Bearer brings his mic back down.

Paul Bearer: (Looking around the arena) How ‘bout all of you? Impressive, huh?

~ As if they needed an excuse, Columbus begins another “ANGLE!” chant, which Kurt rather rudely doesn’t even bother to acknowledge, eyeballing his enemies instead.

Paul Bearer: (Rubs his chin) But… (finger in the air) was it? A’ mean ta’ say, you jus’ ran ya’ mouth, sayin’ ma’ giant needs help ta’ win his matches…

~ Leaning over the ropes, Angle breathes, “That’s right you fat son of a bitch.”


Paul Bearer: Funny. (Looking around) A’ don’t recollect seein’ ma’ giant gettin’ his ass kicked last night by John Cena, and needin’ ‘Aitch-Bee-Kay to come ta’ his rescue.

~ The crowd lets out a thunderous amount of heat as ‘Show smirks down the ramp.

Paul Bearer: Haha, (giggling) face it, Mr. Angle, the oooonly reason you’re runnin’ around ta’night attackin’ folks is so we all think you aren’t happy ‘bout what went down.


~ Angle mouths something … and Bearer holds the mic back up to Big Show.

The Big Show: You might wanna’ think twice about this fight though, Kurt.

Paul Bearer: (Brings it back down) A’ agree. Think twice, think loooong and hard.

~ Down in the ring the Olympic Gold Medallist just kicks the ropes in frustration, demanding that the macabre duo come down to the ring.

Paul Bearer: Think loooong and haaaard ‘bout messin’ with Mr. Bischoff, Mr. Angle

~ It doesn’t look as though the WWE Champion wants to do anymore thinking, choosing instead to keep his beady eyes fixed on his prey.

Paul Bearer: ‘Cause surely ya’ don’ need any proof of what we… are capable of.

The Big Show: (As Bearer holds the mic up) I think our actions… speak for themselves.

~ Taking a step forward, ‘Show looks as though he is ready to get it on, moving down the ramp, until Bearer just rests a hand on his arm, bringing him back a moment.

Paul Bearer: (Shrieking) MA’ GIANT… BANISHED ROB VAN DAM FROM THIS PLACE!!

~ UNGODLY heat for this.

Paul Bearer: MA’ GIANT… ENDED, MA’ OWN SON KANE’S, CAREEEER!!

~ More HUGE heat, as Bearer mops his brow with a handkerchief, becoming irate.

Paul Bearer: And in case -- (grins, catching his breath) in case you were too busy last week, or too selfish three weeks ago, you’d know what ma’ giant and a’ do ta’ people who try ta’ get under our skin. It started… with (baby voice) heeewwwpless lickle’ Eugene -- we put him outta’ his misery. (Sinister grin) And last week? Dustin Rhodes escaped with his head… but Maria? (Shares a ‘look’ with ‘Show)
Mmph-mmm-mmm. Lemme’ just say she’s gone… and she is never comin’ back. NONE OF ‘EM ARE, KURT, NOT KANE, NOT EUGENE, NOT MARIA, NOT VAN DAM … NOT TRIPLE H!!

~ OH!; WHAT? This mention of The King of Kings catches the crowd by surprise and it takes them a few moments to decide on a suitable response.

Paul Bearer:
(Calming down) So if a’ were you, Kurt … I’d think about ma’ own family…

~ Uh-oh. Oh God. Angle’s eyes open wide at this comment, as the crowd gasps.

The Big Show: (Taking the mic) That’s right, Kurt? Your wife Karen… and little Kyra?

~ Good Lord. The look on Angle’s face is almost indescribable; such is the mixture of rage, shock and fear suddenly running through it. Both ‘Show and Bearer wear large, disgusting smiles as they point down to the ring, waving at Kurt in a threatening manner, feeding off his anguish at this moment–

The Big Show: So I’m gonna’ give you one chance, Kurt.

~ Angle looks up slowly, the foam forming around his snarling mouth.

The Big Show: Do you still want… (holds up his right hand) this?

~ ‘Show admires his own deadly right fist that knocked out RVD just last night.

The Big Show: Or do you want to apologise for what you’ve done tonight?

~ The BOOS are THUNDEROUS at the mere mention of the word “apologise”, but Angle doesn’t need to think twice, stepping back, tearing off his shirt, and bellowing up the ramp, “GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE!” at the top of his lungs. ‘Show glowers…

The Big Show: (smirks) … I was hoping you’d say that.

~ Rolling up his sleeves, Big Show MARCHES down the ramp, and Angle lets out a GUTTURAL ROAR…

…and the fight… is… on.

Stomping up the steel steps, ‘Show waits a moment, talking some trash to the WWE Champion, before throwing his big leg over the top rope and stepping into the ring, where Angle races forwards, meeting the giant with a flurry of right hands!!

‘Show is ROCKED by the barrage, as Angle unloads, rearing back with the 2x4, looking to DIM BIG SHOW’S LIGHTS … but ‘Show blocks it, trapping the bat under his arm, pulling it away, AND PIE-FACIN’ KURT ALL THE WAY DOWN TO THE CANVAS!!!

Angle rolls backwards, a slight look of shock on his face, as Big Show holds the 2x4 in his hands, smiling, BEFORE BREAKING THE PIECE OF WOOD OVER HIS KNEE!!

“Oohs” and “ahs” rumble through the building, as ‘Show growls, “Plan B time?” Back up to his feet, Angle walks back over to the giant AND SPITS RIGHT IN HIS EYES!

Columbus ROARS at the display of disrespect from their Olympic Hero, as the giant stumbles backwards, trying to wipe the saliva from his eyes, allowing Angle to DRILL HIM WITH A SUCCESSION OF NASTY LOOKING EUROPEAN UPPERCUTS … until THE SPIRIT SQUAD (minus Mikey ) slide into the ring, free at last, looking for some retribution on the man who took them out earlier…

Kenny gets dropped, Nicky gets dropped, Mitch gets dropped, Johnny gets dropped, as they all run head on into thunderous clotheslines from the WWE Champion, who is truly on fire, still going after Big Show though, kicking him in the corner, yelling at the top of his lungs, “TELL ME WHERE HE IS?!” as the crowd starts to boo again…

…Angle turns…

…and a sadistic smile comes over his face…

…as first Jonathan Coachman

…with…

ERIC BISCHOFF come down the ramp…

…furious…



CHRIS MASTERS ATTACKS ANGLE FROM BEHIND WITH THE MITB BRIEFCASE!!!

THUNDEROUS heat fills the arena, as “The Masterpiece”, having come back through the crowd, hammers away on The Wrestling Machine, still pissed from his earlier embarrassment, with CARLITO up on the apron directing traffic. The Spirit Squad start to get some shots in too, as Bischoff and The Coach enter the ring, Easy E. trembling with rage, pointing at Big Show, “MURDER THAT SONUVA’ BITCH!!”
The largest athlete in the world doesn’t need telling twice, raging from the cheap attack before, ‘Show stomps over, as Masters and Johnny drag Kurt up, and the big dog starts HAMMERING away with his George Foreman like BODY SHOTS.

It’s nothing but a damn MUGGING, as Styles and J.R. go nuts at ringside, and the crowd lets the heels in the ring know EXACTLY what they think of them, Bischoff and his sycophantic allies pick apart the WWE Champion just like the GM foretold at the start of the show, as Masters pulls A TABLE from under the ring and slides it in, with Big Show laying into Angle to the point that he actually starts BLEEDING from the mouth, much to the chagrin of all those in attendance, but the delight of the psychotic Paul Bearer in particular.

As this assassination continues, Coach is catching his breath over by the announce table, “What a show, huh?” he grins at his colleagues.

Back inside the ring, Bischoff, still holding his neck, yells in Kurt’s face, “YOU JUST MADE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF YOUR LIFE, PAL!”


Masters and Kenny finish setting up the table. Bischoff gives ‘Show a little nod, as if to say, “Do it. Finish him” and the monstrous giant wraps his catcher’s mitt hand around Angle’s throat–




“BEHOLD THE KING … THE KING OF KINGS”




Joey Styles: WAIT A MINUTE!!!

The expression BLOWIN’ THE MOTHERFUCKIN’ ROOF gets thrown around a lot, but there is really know other way to describe the Nationwide Arena’s response, as “THE KING OF KINGS” TRIPLE H makes his way out onto the stage!!!

Jim Ross:
DO YOU SEE WHAT I’M SEEIN’!?


Joey Styles: HERE HE COMES!!!

Jim Ross:
Kurt Angle’s bein’ -- he’s being dismantled in the ring, but… but…


Unlike last night Eric Bischoff knows exactly whose side The Game is on, as a look of UTTER FEAR comes over the boss’ face at the sight of Hunter, jeans, leather and denim jacket … and SLEDGEHAMMER IN HAND coming down the walkway!! Yelling instructions frantically, Bischoff sends the four members present of The Spirit Squad HURTLING from the ring and up the ramp to meet the Cerebral Assassin! Kenny, their leader, goes at full speed … BUT GETS MET WITH THE DAMN HAMMER RIGHT TO THE GUT, doubling him over on the ramp!! Unable to stop himself, MITCH RUNS RIGHT INTO AN IDENTICAL SHOT, AS DOES JOHNNY … before Helmsley BLASTS NICKY RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES!!!


Joey Styles: OH MY GAWD!!!

Jim Ross:
GOOD GOD, LOOK AT THE CARNAGE!! TRIPLE H IS COMIN’ FOR BISCHOFF!!!

Joey Styles:
FOR THE SECOND TIME IN TWENTY-FOUR HOURS!!!


With the arena A ROCKIN’ AND A ROLLIN’, Bischoff quickly gets Chris Masters’ attention, dragging him away from the destruction of Kurt Angle for a moment, and sending him out after The Game as well. Taking the MITB briefcase, ‘Piece hops off the apron, and takes a run, LOOKING TO TAKE HUNTER’S HEAD OFF … BUT H DUCKS, AND HAMMERS AWAY ON MASTERS WITH RIGHT HANDS, TAKING HIM BACK UP THE RAMP!!!


Leaving the ring himself, Bischoff yells at Carlito to back him up, as they try to get the dismantled remnants of The Spirit Squad back into the fight with Helmsley, brawling with him ALL THE WAY UP THE RAMP!!!

Back inside the ring, only FOUR MEN are, left, with Big Show STILL POUNDING AWAY ON THE WWE CHAMPION, with The Coach and the ever-faithful Paul Bearer cheering him on!! With Triple H’s music barely dissipating, but the crowd making enough noise to fill a continent, ‘Show runs his finger across his throat, declaring, “THIS FUCKER’S DEAD!” before sticking Kurt’s head between his legs, lifting him up into the air for the POWERBOMB THROUGH THE TABLE … ANGLE BRINGS A PIECE OF THE 2X4 WITH HIM, CRACKING BIG SHOW DOWN IN THE SKULL!!!

“OHHH” roars the crowd, and Bearer is helpless, as The Big Show TUMBLES THROUGH THE ROPES TO THE OUTSIDE, as Angle lands on his feet, GRABS JONATHAN COACHMAN, KICKS HIM BELOW THE BELT, hooks the arm, GETTING THE COLOR COMMENTATOR UP, AND OLYMPIC SLAMMING HIM THROUGH THE WOODEN TABLE!!!!

A THUNDEROUS ovation greets the sound of splintering wood, as the giant, the man who has taken out so many recently, GETS THE HELL OUT OF DODGE!!

Raw’s final shot, as J.R and Styles holla’ over the top frantically, is of Kurt Angle, the WWE Champion, the Olympic Gold Medallist, The Wrestling Machine, bloody and battered, leaning over the ropes, pointing up the ramp at Big Show, bellowing, “YOU!”


Jim Ross: THE WWE CHAMPION IS LIVID, HE IS ENRAGED, BUT BA’ GOD HE IS STILL STANDIN’!!

Joey Styles: THE MONSTER HAS BEEN SLAIN FOR TONIGHT AT LEAST!!

Jim Ross:
FOR ERIC BISCHOFF TONIGHT THERE TRULY WAS … BACKLASH!!!








END OF SHOW



***



Current Card for ECW One Night Stand II
Date: June 11th, 2006
Location: Hammerstein Ballroom; New York, New York
Event Music: Drowning Pool; Bodies

***NO MATCHES YET ANNOUNCED***


***




Current Card for WWE Vengeance
Date: June 25th, 2006
Location: Charlotte Bobcats Arena; Charlotte, North Carolina
Event Music: Eighteen Visions; Victim

World Tag Team Championship Match:
The World’s Greatest Tag Team defend against The Sons Of Samoa w/AAE


***
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Old 08-02-2009, 07:58 PM   #542 (permalink)
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Default Re: Legend Presents: WWE 2006 - Stop Your Grinnin' And Drop Your Linen

First off I'm going to just bunch a lot of comments together on the show all together instead of segment by segment. So first off you continue to amaze me at the way you can tell a story which is something I've always struggled with but want to fix. Your weekly shows are always a great thing to see and sometimes it's just the small details that are nice.

I mean all along the show was great with Angle first arriving and taking out SS from you building it up to where he went after Carlito, Masters, and everyone else before the final closing segment. That's how you tell a story right there and you did it well. I'm very intrigued to see how this Bischoff/Angle thing works out and to see where it goes but something tells me HBK won't be back for a little while but it's been a while since I've been in here so I really can't tell what's going to happen to be honest.

As for the Sons of Samoa I like the team. I have a team that is similar I want to bring in but don't know when I'm going to. It won't feature Umaga but still I think this is a good way to get Umaga's career started but who is Samu? Is that Manu? Because I always get all of them confused. But um it's painfully obvious these two are going to be future tag team champions in the thread and really why shouldn't they be? Who's going to stop them lol?

I loved you featuring a tag team match as the main event as it breaks away from the normal and you were able to also showcase Benjamin/Haas as well in the process. I'm not the biggest fan of Cade/Murdoch so really I'm not that "high" on them so I'm glad they didn't win the titles but it seems SOS are coming soon if they have anything to say about it.

Everything else in the show was great as well and I love Bischoff's Hardcore Initative concept as I want to say they did something similar in real life heading into One Night Stand in 2005 but can't really remember that far back lol. Um, the Mickie thing confused me but that's generally because I haven't been in here for a long time and well I know it's not a full on "review" but I mean there's really not much that needs to be corrected. Overall everything was outstanding imo and I look forward to seeing your Smackdown.
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Old 08-03-2009, 04:47 AM   #543 (permalink)
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Default Re: Legend Presents: WWE 2006 - Stop Your Grinnin' And Drop Your Linen

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Well Gregory Helms against Chavo Guerrero was going to be a very fun way to start off proceedings, imo. But now with this Extreme Exhibition set up by Eric Bischoff, it’s going to be a great opening to the show. Sometimes one thing I really hate about reading weekly shows is that when people book a great match, they don’t do it justice, but that’s definitely not the case with you. Every time you have a good match, you constantly put in a little more detail, and it shows us just why you’re one of the best around these parts. It was a great start to the show… Although I was a little shocked that Chavo picked up the victory, I mean, after all, Helms has been on a bit of a role as of late, but I guess with Chavo being left off Backlash, you needed to make him look worthy once again. Either way, this was a very fun read. I have one little query though, “Edge tries to vertical suplex Chavito back over the ropes—“ Ahhh, how did that get there? Besides that one little typo, which really doesn’t mean much I’m just a nit picker, this opening was flawless.

Shelton Benjamin is here, and he’s walking with a limp to, hopefully that is nothing to serious. By the way, don’t think I didn’t pay attention to the fact that he arrived alone, rather then with Haas. At this point of time I’ve realized just how this story is slowly advancing, and this is just another one of your subtle hints, to what is eventually going to be the hottest break of a tag team ever in BTB. Not yet, though, not yet, I think this one still has some legs.

Another match? I was expecting a few more segments before our next match, but I know this means we are going to have a killer promo to end the show. Mickie James disposes of some jobber, and I liked how you made constant references to her beating last night, and I liked how you mentioned just how scared and paranoid she looked during her entrance. The other day in the discussion thread people were saying why bother writing out entrances for weekly shows, well Mickie’s entrance is pretty much the reason why. You can portray heaps of things with the entrance, and you did it to the full extent right here.

Jonathan Coachman: Listen, Joey, if you looked as good as Mickie James and The Coach do, then maybe you’d understand just how annoying it is to have to share this world with ugly people.” I had to single this line out, I loved it.

I found the Mickie James promo to come across as a little weird in all honesty. I think clearly it was her acceptance speech, but I don’t know, I guess it just came off a little weird, as I really don’t understand what was so disrespectful that would garner her any heat. If anything, I thought this speech came across as a generic baby face. Maybe I missed something, but I don’t think I did, and If I didn’t, I’m just really confused.

Victoria and Trish Stratus coming out and getting stopped by security shows that definitely both women are going to be gunning for the title still, so things are just going to continue to heat up. Maybe Mickie is going to need a friend to help her out, you know, somebody like a Neidhart or Phoenix?

at the Spirit Squad in a Mercedes, why did one of them not feel upset? Anyway, Kurt Angle was an absolute nut here. What I just want to get some clarification on is why is he attacking the Spirit Squad? Is this something from last night that I missed, or is this just a weird, intense Angle? If it is something I missed, the commentators probably should have refreshed our memories.

ECW One Night Stand should be dandy; I’m definitely looking forward to you writing a whole, extreme event.

Joey Styles: Just moments ago WWE Champion Kurt Angle from behind with a steel chair, as The Spirit Squad argued amongst themselves. I don’t know if I’d call what they were having an argument, as really only one guy spoke .

Armando Alejandro Estrada comes out with the two monsters, and every time he gets the microphone in this thread, I sit back and relax because I know I’m in for some brilliant reading, and that’s exactly what I got here. It was nice and short, got straight to the point, and it introduces us to Umaga and Samu. These two guys should definitely be a great pairing, but I can’t see them being the ones to take the titles away from WGTT. I think it’s because I want ‘Mags to be a singles wrestler.

Jonathan Coachman: And why not, JR!? Weren’t you paying attention during that video package – in which I feature so prominently – they took out the champs!? Another great line from The Coach, I’ve been extremely impressed with the commentary so far tonight. I also thought it was a bit funny how his tone had changed about The Sons of Samoa since last night.

Impressive debut by the Sons of Samoa, and I expect to see some good things out of this tandem within the next few months. Also, quick question, does this mean Estrada is no longer going to be Bischoff’s lackey because damn I was enjoying him in that role?

Kurt Angle being alone, once again didn’t make me think this was a pointless couple of moments, it made me think where the hell is Mikey?

Carlito and Chris Masters in the house as well? I think things are only going to get better and better from this show, and speaking of this show, one thing that I’ve noticed and liked is the way you make the heels park. They all park ‘arrogantly’ because they are arrogant, simple things like these are things that really impress me.

Joey Styles: I guess when you’re buddies with Eric Bischoff the medical treatment is pretty good, eh, Coach? You sure recover quick from all those ass-kicking’s you get? More of the epic commentary that I am loving tonight. It’s good to see Coach isn’t just giving crap, he’s copping it as well. It makes for much better chemistry.

Carlito was clearly very ginger, so the fact that you kept his promo work short was good, although I wouldn’t have minded to hear a little bit more of his epciness. I love the way Masters does everything he is told also, especially since I can’t see it changing any time soon, or at all.

Wow. I love the way you write Kurt Angle no matter what he is doing. His character is so great right now, and this beat down was awesome. Oh by the way, at The Coach.

Smart thinking to put the Flair and Orton video replay on Raw to keep it fresh in every ones heads. Mad props on what was a sick promo to, simply awesome work, as per usual with you .

This really was a terrible match, umm, at least the Basham’s got the win I guess, but overall yuck.

Benjamin and Haas looking sore, the Redneck Wrecking Crew looking great, once again a terrific way to stack the odds, and show just how admirable the WGTT are, right?

Hmm, The Coach is panicking, and I’m looking forward to the epic final promo after the main event. I don’t know how you’re going to put Angle, Bischoff and Triple H, and Big Show if he makes an appearance all into this final segment, but its going to be interesting to find out.

Seriously, this main event was great, nothing really was written wrong at all. Shelton leaving and then coming back is also going to come back into the fray of things later down the line, Haas could say Benjamin abandoned him. Anyway, great match, and just as I predicted, the WGTT defy the odds… again.

Your final promo was awesome. I’m not sucking up your ass or anything, but if I were to highlight the lines I really enjoyed I’d probably be highlighting the whole thing. This was simply a wonderful promo that, well it seems leaves Angle and Triple H against half the roster. Hopefully RVD can get back in some way and even the odds. Whatever happens, this ending was awesome.

Overall, another great show, A really good following from Backlash and things don’t look like they are going to slow down for a second here on Raw.
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Old 08-03-2009, 10:04 AM   #544 (permalink)
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Default Re: Legend Presents: WWE 2006 - Stop Your Grinnin' And Drop Your Linen

RAW Feedback


First off, plz don’t regret posting in full. Trust me; it was a joy to read, as I think I told you plenty of times during the feedback for it. Your match writing pretty much owns, so plz don’t quit on me it now.

Anyway, onto this show, it looks pretty stacked. You’ve got an absolute shitload you can do following on from Backlash, so to say I’m looking forward to it would be an understatement. The video package reminding us just of that potential is a nice touch, and well, Coach owned, as is the norm here. You’ve got to love him.

Kicking off with a match? Interesting. A promo from either of Triple H or Shawn Michaels was expected on my part after their epic returns, however a match with two popular, athletic midcarders is always a very good way to start. The announcement of the tables match with Coach looking a little suspicious after earlier pleading innocence with the match was pretty brilliant. Interesting way to build up One Night Stand, though I must say I like you using it. Surprised to see this as a brawl tbh since both men can go at a quicker pace when necessary, however as cruiserweights they are more grounded types, so I guess the two staying grounded for the most part makes sense. Speed of the match built up very well throughout with the teases of going through the table. The end was pretty damn crazy and really just a whole lot of fun. Pretty innovative and great stuff all round. Not too sure about Helms losing as well as playing heel for the match, as he seems to be the one moving up the card, though this does look to have evened out your midcard to an extent. Should be interesting to see which of these two men gets involved with ‘Lito next.

Nice little reminder of last night with Benjamin. Serves its purpose well.

pha-lanx - –noun
(in ancient Greece) a group of heavily armed infantry formed in ranks and files close and deep, with shields joined and long spears overlapping.


I see. I like this use of actual storylines in the diva division. Exactly why Mickie’s match was just a squash was well explained and it did its job well. Mickie’s actual speech has me a bit divided. While I like the idea behind it, it just didn’t scream psycho Mickie to me, and to me at least, psycho Mickie was Mickie at her best. Both women coming down and showing that they want a piece of Mickie leaves us some build up over the next few weeks before deciding on a definitive contender which is good. The idea behind the promo itself was all pretty good, however Mickie seemed to be lacking a bit on the stick. A bit more paranoia needed to come out, imo.

@ Coach. Seriously, ownage. The showing of intensity was cool to see, though I’m not sure why Angle’s gone after The Spirit Squad. Hopefully we got some sort of explanation on that. @ Mikey’s “I swear, I don’t have anything against bald people”. Top line.

ECW making a real return, eh? Something you don’t usually see. It’ll definitely be interesting to see how you go about this.

Promo from Estrada was good, setting the scene for the debut of The Sons of Samoa well, along with the killer video package. Two squashes in a row isn’t exactly exhilarating, but I guess it’s just the way the show pieced together best. The squash to emphasize the power and force of The Sons of Samoa is a good idea, as is showing them for all to see on free TV. Glad to see them making their intentions clear thanks to Estrada, as like Coach said, after Backlash they’re natural contenders. Along with the disintegrating relationship between Benjamin and Haas, this should make for some good viewing.

An explanation on why Angle is so paranoid will be interesting. As will why exactly ‘Lito is in the firing line. Perhaps moving Carlito closer to that main event scene? I’d mark.

‘Lito with the cheap heat was alright, although the promo lacked a bit of substance behind it. Was hoping for more than just the classic respect promo. Angle coming out and kicking ass was pretty much expected after you hyped him up as going after Carlito, with his intentions being made clear in a very nice way. Hopefully we got more of ‘Lito/Angle in the coming weeks, though for now I’m just interested to see where Angle pursuing The Bisch goes next.

Nice reminder of the emotional promo with Flair last night. You’ve got some real nice angles going on here.

Ugh, The Basham Brothers. Three squashes in a row – especially one featuring The Basham Brothers winning – isn’t exactly screaming match quality. A lot of tag stuff tonight though, hopefully aiding the future of the division.

Oooo, more intrigue. You’re building the arrival of Easy E up well. I expect an epic closing promo with a lot of people to come.

This being your main event just really shows how much tag stuff you’ve had on the show, as well as how hard TWGTT have been pushed. Haas not raising his hand? A small sign, but definitely one that’s there for all to see. Anyway, liking the use of cheating for The Crew to take the advantage every time they do, showing TWGTT as a pair of very talented individuals who are damn hard to stop, whilst also showing that those damn rednecks will cheat when necessary. The continuation of this storyline between Haas and Benjamin is being built up really well too, with Haas having more ‘reason’ to be pissed at Benjamin now, thanks to Benjamin being hurt and taken away. The real beatdown of Haas was drawn out well, and his comeback of suplexes pretty much owned. At first I wasn’t sure on Benji coming back out again, though with the post match assault it all makes sense. Some nice development here.

A reminder of Show and RVD was actually needed at this point, as I’d forgotten about it, so a well timed promo. Would have liked to have seen Show on the... erm, show (accidental pun, I swear) at some stage tonight, however I guess we’re not going to see that. A Show/Hunter staredown at this stage is money, imo.

Angle promo absolutely SCREAMED intensity which is great stuff. Whether it was addressing Shawn or Bischoff’s ‘bitches’ as he so eloquently put it, Angle was in top form. Actually quite shocked you had Show come out, rather than Shawn, though I like the idea of Shawn once again hiding away, showing his cowardice. Show and Bearer were at their cold, calculating best too, with the whole promo just being well set out, building up slowly with the way Show and Bearer go about their business in a beautiful way. Going through the people they’d taken care of and daring to mention Triple H really says it’s on between Show and Tripper, which as I said, is money. The brawl between Angle and Show started very, very nicely, with Angle again showing just how much of a trooper he is. The run ins from Bischoff’s troops continued on well, with Bischoff creating the distraction for Masters being well done, as well as the beatdown that followed, all setting right up into the entrance of Triple H perfectly, especially with Angle about to go through the table. Great show closing brawl, with Coach being the one to take the fall leaving the fans happy. Great way to finish another very good show off.


While you were obviously a bit pressed for match quality, the promos in this show, like always, more than made up for it. Though it was a fallout show it was still at a frenetic pace, with stories continuing well, rather than not much happening as we can often see on these fallout shows. Your main event scene here is stacked to say the least, and you’re definitely taking advantage of it with the angles. Great stuff.
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Old 08-05-2009, 03:50 PM   #545 (permalink)
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Default Re: Legend Presents: WWE 2006 - Stop Your Grinnin' And Drop Your Linen

Quote:
Originally Posted by Broken Star. View Post
pha-lanx - –noun
(in ancient Greece) a group of heavily armed infantry formed in ranks and files close and deep, with shields joined and long spears overlapping.
Smart ass

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Notorious K.O.P View Post
As for the Sons of Samoa I like the team. I have a team that is similar I want to bring in but don't know when I'm going to. It won't feature Umaga but still I think this is a good way to get Umaga's career started but who is Samu? Is that Manu?
I'll address this now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wrestling Observer Newsletter
There has been some confusion and speculation over the recent debut (or re-debut) of the character of Samu on Sunday's Backlash and Monday's subsequent RAW. It is well know that Umaga, Samu's partner, is in fact Eddie Fatu, formerly known as Jamal as part of 3-Minute Warning, who has been off WWE television since 2003. However, despite having only recently been involved in a long-term program with Gregory Helms A.K.A The Hurricane, Samu is in fact Matt Anoa'i A.K.A Rosey. Originally the plan was just to bring back Fatu to join forces with the character of Armando Alejandro Estrada since he has been impressing with recent performances in OVW. It was decided though, with recent concerns over the lack of depth in RAW's tag team division, to bring in Anoa'i too, since he has experience and chemistry with Fatu. Expect the focal points of this new faction, throughout, to be Anoa'i and Hazem Ali, better known as Armando Alejandro Estrada.
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Old 08-09-2009, 12:07 PM   #546 (permalink)
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Default Re: Legend Presents: WWE 2006 - Stop Your Grinnin' And Drop Your Linen

Taken quite a while to get around to it, but I’ve been working on it bit by bit.

Opening promos are one of my favourite things (at least they used to be in years gone by) about PPV events, and I’d go as far as to say, this one is my favourite to read in all my time in BTB. Very poignant imo, and sets the stage perfectly for ‘the backlash’ of WrestleMania.

Second Raw PPV of 2006. Don’t be forgetting the unforgettable NYR. .

Oh hells yeah. IC title to kick this shindig off with a bang. Was worried you might swerve us and not kick off with this match, but I’m glad you made the right call. Been looking forward to seeing Benjamin and Haas tear it up, and with only six matches on the card, there should be no excuses for cutting this one short.

Over the last few weeks, you’ve made huge strides with Haas, making him a helluva lot more than Shelton Benjamins other half. I could easily imagine a lot of the fans being torn between the two here.

Starts off in a sporting fashion, but I’m overwhelmed by the incredible detail you’ve put in, just describing the circling of the ring by the two men. Early dominance from Haas on the mat looked to frustrate Benjamin of all people, who resorts to using the elbow. Had it pencilled for Haas to end up getting frustrated early on, but you continue to surprise with this friendly feud, which gets a little down and dirty as Benjamin breaks away from the wrestling aspect. Still though, Haas appears to be a step ahead of his counterpart, even with things breaking down, and the friendship quickly going out the window.

Completely surprised with the intensity shown already, with both men straying from what brought them to the dance, and going at it with a brawl. Oh boy, trash talking too?? I’m loving this now. Titles > Friendship. Haas continues to hold the keys, dominating his partner. Jesus - a head butt?? Where these two EVER friends?? Incredible turn of events, putting over just how much Haas wants the belt. It’s also starting to become more clear (at least to me) that Benjamin is being positioned as the face for the long run. He’s the one pulling off flashy moves, getting crowd pops, thanks to his athleticism, although the little bit of trash talk ‘It’s all worth it bro’ kept him with some attitude.

Now, things seem to be breaking down ever so much, with an array of near falls for both men, busting out power moves. Nice to see the tradition of the triple Germans living on in this thread, through Benjamin (although we do still have Angle), but Haas isn’t so keen, and turns it around, outgunning Benjo with three of the best, and the crowd reactions to that are simply stunning. From heat, to counting along. Fickle bunch.

Get the feeling we’re about to enter the final stages, with the first real attempt at a finish from Haas, but a nice counter from Benjamin puts a stop to it, and eventually sets Shelton up to take over, use his athletic ability, and debuts a new armbar submission. Terrific use of description to show the pain Haas went through, and yet again, another great example of how athletic the two men are, with Charlie reversing the seemingly unbreakable submission into his own, much more recognisable submission hold, only for Benjamin to counter that into a near fall. Terrific sequence right there.

The Haas frustration must continue to grow, following that last ditch kick out from Shelton off the Total Haastility, and the counter out of the Haas of Pain into the Seated Armbar. Just everything he does to win, Benjamin seems to have an answer for. Despite being able to counter the armbar, it’s everything that Benjamin does that earns the cheers of the fans - although personally, I’d be on Haas’ side after the turnbuckle bomb. Shocked that the champion survived that, twinned with a super kick, and countered himself for the win. Awesome opener. ****. We’ll be clamouring for the rematch now, and I expect it to be even better next time, with Haas THAT much more determined to take the title. Cant wait for it.

Should be interesting to see how this match affects the tag title match later, as it seems Haas now has his mind already on that, asking how Benjamin is doing. Surely, he must still be harbouring some sort of grudge…

Prediction scale; 2 for 2. Benjamin to win, and this to open.

Bitchy Trish Stratus ftw. So sexy in that phase. Anyway, I’m more curious here about the whereabouts now of Maria. Is she just being given time off after whatever it was that went down on Raw?? Or is she still MIA??

I certainly wouldn’t envy Carlito and Helms to have to follow that opener. Should still be decent though. Wise to go for the jugular from the get go. I don’t think the fans would be patient enough for these two to just slip into gear over time. All Helms in the early going, taking it to CCC, outmanoeuvring him at every step - whilst wearing his coat!!! Seems to me that he should’ve kept it on, as once it came off, it was downhill. Y’know, the more I see Masters as a cheerleader for CCC, the more I’m thinking he has an agenda to get a chance at the MITB contract.

Nice shift from high flying, quick paced offence to more methodical attacks from Carlito, keeping it simple, but effective, going to the midsection of Helms. The challenger has been softened up, and it allows Carlito to dominate, nicely putting together short lived bursts from Helms, only to be slowed down by CCC each time, even after the sleeper went wrong for the holder.

Loved the crowd pleasing top rope crotch job. When it happens to someone with comedic ability like Carlito, it tends to go down better, given the type of facials he has to sell that type of move. More high flying with the Hurricanrana - would’ve personally preferred the awesome top swinging rope neck breaker Helms has used from time to time (KOTR 2002).

The comeback is most definitely on for Helms, now, although I had a hard time following the ‘inverted unprettier’ move. Was that the vertebreaker?? Hope not, as that should NEVER be kicked out of. Just plain sick. Helms throws away his advantage, but grabs it back with an excellent little counter to the Back stabber, and segues into another brief LOL moment, with the crotch butt.

Totally expected the shady finish once Masters got involved, but Helms brilliantly avoided the knucks, and delivered a Shining Wizard, but thanks to ‘Piece, this one is still ongoing. Ref bump?? Wouldn’t have expected that in this match, but it opens the door for Masters to get involved once again after the NOHS, but the fight of Helms surprised me greatly, taking out Masters … but getting nailed by the case, and finished by the Back stabber.

Would’ve much preferred a clean win for Carlito to move on, and up, but he will definitely have at least one more showdown with Helms in the coming weeks to draw a line under this feud. Meanwhile, it‘s a tough break for Helms … AGAIN. ***. Good, solid match up.

3 for 4 on the predictions front.

“The Showdown in Motown” - incredible tag line.

Frenzied opening, carrying over the anger of Stratus having been unable to get her hands on Mickie. I assume Victorias involvement in this was purely designed to just keep the inevitable Mickie vs. Trish showdown for later down the road. As far as I was concerned, this was always going to be a case of Trish or Mickie to win, despite the awesomeness of Vickie. And, I’ve got to say, Vickie was put over really well as a threat throughout - a HUGE threat, probably outperforming her two opponents -, not coming across as the filler I’m certain she was designed to be.

LMAO at the cycle of slaps. *Notes it down for future reference*, inventive, innovative stuff, that would undoubtedly be getting massive reactions from the fans in attendance. Excellent little spot to add some fun, yet keep the aggressive nature of the match going. Action just hasn’t let up, even when it briefly came down to the one on one scenarios, as the third person was always quickly coming back into contention, very fast paced, making for an exciting match - certainly not the ‘toilet break’ that many label the womens matches.

‘Argentine Backbreaker Rack Drop’ - show off . Again, such a fast paced array of action; loved this little sequence-

Quote:
Quickly, Mickie wraps her arm around Trish’s head, letting out a wild SCREAM, GOING FOR THE MICKIE-DT -- but Trish spins out of it, DUCKS A MICKIE CLOTHESLINE, runs, hits the ropes, CUTTING MICKIE IN HALF WITH HER VARIATION OF A SPEAR!!! Trish pops right back up to her feet – SUPERKICK FROM VICTORIA TAKES HER HEAD OFF -- MICKIE COMES OFF THE SECOND ROPE WITH A DIVING CROSSBODY ONTO VICKIE, COMPLETELY NO-SELLING THE SPEAR AND ALL THREE WOMEN ARE DOWN!!! Forgetting the stipulations like they always do, the official begins the count…
I love this cycle of offence cropping up again, adds a little bit of fun to proceedings in a way, yet it keeps in with the tenacity of the contest. Just as it looked like Mickie was about to have it won, Victoria snuffs the Mickie-T.

Jesus H Christ- incredible little sequence with the Alley Oop, and the mid air Chick Kick. Off the charts insane. Shocked that Mickie was able to counter Victoria so soon after that too - disappointed actually if I’m honest. Should’ve sold that Chick Kick for much longer imo. Widows Peak HAS GOT to end it for Mickie now … but the triple threat rules saved her. Surely down to Victoria and Trish now. :O

Mickie stole it?? Oh boy, just when I thought Trish had the match wrapped up too, gutting finish for the long time champion. I said earlier that Victoria was in this mainly to stop the inevitable James / Stratus showdown from happening just yet, but her performance was terrific. Still, the long term feud is Trish and Mickie, and I suspect we’ll eventually see Victoria eased out of the equation. ****. Awesome female match up, that’s unlikely to get the plaudits it deserves.

At least the involvement of Estrada made this promo worthwhile. Just cant accept the Spirit Squad whatsoever. Hopefully Estrada was hinting that if they fail to win, they’re fucked … preferably by Umaga .

Heh, this is more like it. Best showing of tension between Benjamin and Haas yet - the last comment from both men tipped this one over the edge. The break up doesn’t seem so obvious to go down now, and I think you’ll be holding off for another short period at least. Just doesn’t seem like the right time to pull the trigger all of a sudden.

Quote:
Jim Ross:
Looks like someone’s got a case of the liver tale.
Think it’s limber tale.

The DQ finish was odd, but quickly cleared up. Loving The Coach doing the donkey work for Bischoff too. LMAO- only the Spirit Squad would think of using a trampoline in a No DQ match. This is going to be an extremely rough night for the champions, especially if it’s Haas that will be doing most of the donkey work, given the condition of Benjamin.

Spirit Squad are almost literally throwing the kitchen sink at Haas, but to his credit, Haas has been phenomenal thus far in surviving the onslaught - surprisingly so, especially with Benjamin acting as more of a hindrance than a help, spending most of his time trying to recover, then immediately trying to jump in, giving the Squad an easy opening to kick the crap outta Haas.

Even as it looks like he’s found an opening, Haas is cut off by another cheerleader, following his break of the count. Lots of alley-oops. Too many. And again, Haas just CANT make that vital tag, despite his tremendous fighting spirit. The hot tag was building and building, and finally you pulled the trigger, and I could imagine the reaction in the arena for that one, as the suspense for it built to a fitting climax, as the German sounded EPIC.

Benjamin does the routine hot face antics of cleaning house with his incredible athleticism, topped off with a ‘anything you can do, I can do better’ fuck you to Haas with an EPIC T-Bone from the top. I doubt it was intended that way, but I want to drive the wedge further between them . The fans would be most certainly going batshit for Shelton at this point, and Haas getting a few moments to recuperate before helping out as the numbers just about looked to be gaining on Benjamin was perfectly timed.

It’s all going wrong now for the cheerleaders. Fucked up chair shot, and the super kick into the chair sees another two down … and it leaves Kenny … who doesn’t seem so cocky now. **1/2. Fairly run of the mill tag match, but had a nice build up to the hot tag, and a good ‘payback’ finish, with everything falling apart at the seams for the challengers, and the WGTT retaining the belts … and seemingly on the same page …

Or??

Hold it, doesn’t look like we’re going to find out just yet … it’s ESTRADAAAAAAA TIME!!!

Sons of Samoa??? Obviously one is Umaga … who is the other?? Manu?? Although Manu certainly wouldn’t be a 400 pounder?? Rikishi with face paint . Regardless … Haas and Benjamin just got fucked up. Interesting, unique debut for Umaga, the first time I think I’ve seen the character brought in for a tag team. I think it was put best on commentary; one of the most impactful debuts you’ll ever witness.

Cant imagine Bischoff will be too pleased that the Spirit Squad are leaving him high and dry, after everything he’s done to help them in the last few months. Trouble ahead for them if you ask me.

The transformation of The Big Show in the last six weeks has been nothing short of incredible. With Paul Bearer by his side, he’s become a scary fucker, and he’s not just making empty threats … he’s going through with it.

This one certainly has the big match feel to it. The big entrances, the descriptions, and even the small detail of RVD climbing into the cage. Has a special feel attached. Big stakes. Makes sense for RVD to be the aggressor, Big Show doesn’t need to come out of the blocks roaring, as he’s going to have all the advantages anyway. No surprise that the attempted Irish whip didn’t work out. Seemed a little odd for Show to try and call it off so soon, as he had really absorbed too much damage, but it was obvious that RVD wasn’t going to just let it happen. The use of the wrist tape was a nice addition, choking out Show with everything he’s got.

Despite being significantly weakened, Show proves to be just too strong still for his much smaller opponent to mash his face into steel. RVD though is literally on fire - and rightly so - with his career at stake. And that, is something you’ve worked well in this early going, as it clearly comes across that this is more than a grudge match; the fight in RVD is that of a man that is fighting for his life. Brilliantly pitched offence from a desperate man.

Yet still, he cant overpower the dazed giant. Every time he’s tried to inflict serious damage, he’s been overpowered, and the second attempt at the cage looks like it could seriously backfire for RVD. And with Big Show dominating, the next portion of the match was tricky to read through. As you put it; slow, methodical, and just how Show would want it. Despite it making sense, it’s also really boring to read, so I honestly just glanced through for a bit, whilst Show dominated completely. With the surroundings of a cage too, it makes it that much harder to keep the action exciting with the big man in charge, as the area is pretty much a closed shop. The offence though was spot on from Show, targeting the ribs, methodically picking the smaller man apart.

Over that little hump, you picked it up a little with RVD doing his damndest to prevent Show from walking out, and from there, it was nice to see the cage actually becoming a factor, with RVD becoming a crash test dummy for Show to throw around into the mesh. Naturally, he still wont give up, grabbing the leg again … but it all appears to be only adding to his plight, as the wrappings come away from the ribs.

Smart tactics from Show too, choking RVD with the bandages, then tying him up, and I gotta love Coaches love for Show; Ingenious . STILL Van Dam wont be stopped, and AGAIN stops Show. Marking out for the desperation of Bearer, trying to drag Show out. The worm has turned, and it’s RVD back to the boil, with a sensational kick from the top, sending Shows skull into the steel … and finally manages to slam his head into it too!!! Absolutely loving the comeback from RVD, written superbly imo, with Show finally taking punishment.

OH JESUS!!! Unreal Chokeslam. Just when it seemed like RVD had Show on the brink, the match literally turns on it’s head. I see what you’re doing there … getting a chair conveniently into the ring … wonder what that’s for?? Hmm…

Burlap sack makes an appearance … but what the hell is in it?? Must be something hard anyway. Regardless, RVD is still refusing to give in. You do love that alley-oop don’t ya?? . Just as it was starting to get a little repetitive, the mysterious chair finally makes an impact, and who better to use it that the master of assisted chair shots … RVD!!! VAN DAMINATOR~!!!

CARLITO??????? WHAT … THE … FUCK??? And now Masters?? What the heck is going on here????? Looks like Bischoff will go to any length to get rid of Van Dam, and it’ll do CCC and Masters no harm to help the boss. Laughed out load when Masters went to help Carlito instead of getting Show out of the ring … the price of love cannot be bought .

Well, this is gonna settle it. TRIPLE H!!!

Wait just a cotton picking minute - he’s HELPING Van Dam????? Pretty good job of it too, taking out Masters, AND SENDING CARLITO OFF THE CAGE THROUGH THE TABLE!!!!!! Holy shit moment of the night, undoubtedly, and it most certainly means Triple H is off the Bischoff family Christmas card list.

Awesome moment, that’s just sent this match completely over the top.

NOOOOOOOOOOOO- he missed the five star :@. Right hand … second right hand … third right hand. Put a fork in this one … it’s done. RVD is history, and Big Show just killed him off. Unbelievable finish. ****. A true talking point match, with all sorts of carnage to give a sensational climax, which the match most definitely needed - fourth star is for the closing sequence alone.

Time for Flair. Didn’t expect to hear him retire. Thoroughly expected him to run for the Smackdown election … and I just knew there would be a twist … and the appearance of Orton provides just that. Not sure what business Orton has on a Raw show … and indeed, why has he been missing since WrestleMania?? Could’ve at least had the commentators flag up those two points during his entrance. Trying to get Flair to un-retire and attempt to hit number 17 … vicariously … through Orton?? Didn’t expect that to fly.

Some great comments from both men throughout this promo, and it sets the stage for what could most definitely be a long running chase for Orton to get Flair back in the ring. Dying to see how you approach it, as it has the makings of a spectacular angle in the long term.

Main event time bay-bay. First blood to Angle with the shoulder, but it’s destined to be a long feeling out process. Everything though, in the early going is going in favour of Angle, outmanoeuvring the ‘champ’ at every turn. Angle spitting completely caught me off guard. If I had to call either man to spit, I’d have said Cena … but Angle?? Intense. Bit of a turnaround from Cena eventually, working his way into this chess-like contest, with a knockdown of his own … and ZING - the receipt, with Cena spitting in Angles face. Personal?? Damn right. Angle responding with a slap … what a bitch, lol.

Very back and forth in these early stages, as it doesn’t seem like either guy is able to get a real foothold on, and dominate proceedings for any length of time. Some trademark offence from both men too, from the awkward Fisherman Cena possesses, to the big forearm uppercut from Angle. Nice to see it get a little more down and dirty on the outside, with Angle surprisingly being the aggressor in this instance, with the attack carrying over to the inside, and a sustained amount of offence for Angle significantly slows Cena.

As you’d expect, Cena goes back to what brung him to the dance to make his fight back, but the balance shifts back and forth a little more before Cena can really take over for a sustained period. Thus far, it’s came across as a spectacular back and forth, no quarter asked - none given affair - what a main event should be about imo.

Counter to ‘You Cant See Me’ ftw. That just about makes Angle the definite fan favourite surely . Throughout, these two are coming off as true equals, matching one another, step for step, which is probably a better rub for Cena, being able to hang with the highly touted ‘best in the business’ at his own game. The counter from German #3 into an eventual Throwback was testament to this.

Surprised to see the flying leg drop busting out this early, as it feels like we’re still in the early stages. Given the previous meetings between them, it makes sense that they are wise to one anothers signature offence, hence the counters to the STFU and the Anklelock respectively. Took me a little by surprise that it’s Cena that ends up focusing in on a body part first, targeting the legs of the champion, and doing so with vigour, busting out a shin breaker onto steps, and then the usual off the steel post that comes with every sequence of ‘picking the body part apart’. Some real intensity shown from Cena too, setting up a few unsuccessful attempts at the STFU.

Seemed like Angle was in a real deal of trouble, so it sort of killed the assault on the legs for him to blast back out of nowhere with the German. No selling isn’t cool … well, he didn’t still favour the leg, but got off too much offence imo. Would’ve preferred to see him attempt the German, but for the leg to give out, and sell the pain a little more. The FU at this juncture also didn’t fit for me, and felt out of place. It’s gotten a little bit shaky at this stage, from the beginning of the short lived Angle fight back.

Hopefully you can get it back on track, with the fight getting back to it’s feet, and the trading blows sequence that’s become a regular staple in big Cena matches, getting the fans fully involved was a positive step to take in my book, after the last passage. No counter for the 5 Knuckle Shuffle this time.

Quote:
The Olympian holds on for dear life, as Cena tries to pull him away -- ANGLE DROPS OFF THE SHOULDERS - AND GOES BEHIND!! Grabbing Cena’s arm, Angle goes underneath, LIFTING HIM UP INTO THE AIR FOR THE OLYMPIC SLAM -- BUT CENA LANDS ON HIS FEET, WRAPS HIS LEG THROUGH ANGLE’S, TRIPPING HIM DOWN, POUNCING ON HIS BACK - APPLYING THE STF-U!!!!
Awesome exchange. The type of thing I love, with big time counter, followed by bigger time counter. You most definitely captured the plight of Angle, letting us into just how much pain he was going through to survive, desperately caught in the STFU, but just surviving.

Shoe goes onto the other foot all of a sudden … and now lets see if Cena has the heart to find the ropes … methinks he does. Again, wonderful description of the pain running through the body of Cena, just like Angle, putting over his heart and will to win. My word, what a set of counters again; from Ankle lock to the FU … to the Angle slam. And it’s still not over!! Another terrific sequence - the type that has an audience going fucking nuts. Heh, strap comes down … bad place for Cena to be now.

It’s turning into a move for move conundrum now, and still, the FU isn’t enough to bring the title home to Cena. It’s going to take something unbelievably special to bring this match to a close … AND A THIRD FU STILL DOESN’T DO IT … BECAUSE SHAWN FUCKING MICHAELS IS HERE!!!!!!!

*Predicted that. Points plz *

Sickening assault from Michaels that surely costs Cena - not only this match, not only the title for now, but his entire future on Raw. No titles for him again … which is a perfect set up for the ultimate chase for the belt. Cena is going to be like a dog with a bone in an attempt to fight his way out of this stipulation, and it has EPIC written all over it.

Angle wins … but the aftermath would have you thinking the only winner here was HBK himself. ****1/2. Unreal ending to a chaotic show. My one concern is the recent amount of sickening, brutal assaults. Kennedy on Matt Hardy, Bluebloods on their tag team rivals, and now this. With a rate of one per week, these assaults are going to start losing some impact imo. The less they happen, the more shocking and brutal they’ll come across in the long run. At least that’s my way of thinking. Nonetheless, spectacular job from Michaels in sending a brutal, sick message to both his rivals … but mostly Cena.

Overall, what can I say?? This was an epic PPV. Just sorry the review was such a long time in coming, but better late than never, eh?? I rambled on a little at times, and at others just relayed the show back to you, but unfortunately that's my style at times, as unhelpful as it is. Great job. At least someone else around these parts loves you
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Old 08-09-2009, 01:06 PM   #547 (permalink)
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This would've been up yesterday, with the show up today, but BT decided to murder Broadband last week. Awesome. Luckily, all it means is that I'm one day behind schedule. Not the end of the world. I'm not going AWOL again.


***



As the anarchic Friday Night SmackDown! juggernaut rumbles through Cincinnati, Ohio this week with the unpredictable McMahon siblings at the helm, will we finally get the answers we have been searching for since WrestleMania XXII over a month ago, and, more importantly, will we crown a new number one contender?

Last week “The Rated R Superstar” Edge cemented his name as one that will go down in the annals of the World Heavyweight Championship, as he achieved what many considered impossible: he defeated The Undertaker in his first title defence. Of course, Edge’s close proximity to the ropes during the decisive pin fall will no doubt be brought into question, but the fact remains, Edge is now the only person in the history of our industry to defeat “The Animal” Batista and The Undertaker in back to back championship matches. Quite possibly the two most dominant champions of all time, and Edge has beaten them both in succession. Who will be next to challenge the self-proclaimed “Master Manipulator”? Are The Phenom and The Animal finished quite finished with their Faustian foe? Whatever the case, the World Heavyweight Champion remains, as always, a marked man.

Speaking of The Undertaker, if “The Demon of Death Valley” still nurses aspirations of championship gold in his future, he will have to act swiftly, since his date with destiny has already been decided. Last week, “The Real Deal” Bobby Lashley fulfilled his end of his agreement with Shane McMahon, and defeated Batista in a bloody, violent No Holds Barred Match -- a stipulation only added at the last minute my young Mr. McMahon -- thanks to some rather timely assistance from the ambiguous Irishman Finlay. As a result, Lashley has now been granted his much desired rematch with the man who defeated him at WrestleMania, but, in what could well be the deciding factor, in any kind of match he or his agent Paul Heyman so desire. The Undertaker’s quest for the World Title may have to be placed on hold … for his own good.

The aforementioned “Fighting Irishman” Finlay not only cost Batista a match for the second straight week last week in Green Bay, he also racked up his third singles victory over the United States Champion Rey Mysterio. Rey-Rey has been in a hotbed of form recently, so this cannot be ignored. Finlay’s previous victories came before Mysterio had gold around his waist. Will this most recent win create thoughts of grandeur, perhaps of the United States Title, or, maybe, even grander?

Also on the broadcast on Friday night, watch out for the combustible situations surrounding the WWE Tag Team and Cruiserweight Championships, as both The Bluebloods and Jamie Noble respectively find themselves in the firing line once again. After viciously assaulting their main rivals The Hooligans, MNM, and The Mexicools last week, William Regal and Paul Burchill have opted to give their slimy accomplices, The Basham Brothers, their championship opportunity this week. Having already successfully defended the titles against Rey Mysterio & Jamie Noble and MNM since capturing the gold at WrestleMania, one has to assume that the pompous Englishmen are trying to run through the competition as quickly as possible. Meanwhile, Jamie Noble’s new number one contender, the man he took the belt from at WrestleMania the incumbent Kid Kash, will get the chance, no doubt much to his delight, to showcase his many talents, as he faces Shannon Moore in one on one competition. How will Noble cope knowing his arch-nemesis is so nearby?

Watch out for Mr. Kennedy also, as he gets ready for his big showdown at Judgment Day with the man he put on the shelf, Matt Hardy, in a warm up match this week from Cincinnati, Ohio.

All this and more on Friday Night SmackDown!, 9/8CT on the CW

Confirmed Matches:

Kid Kash vs. Shannon Moore

Brent Albright is in action

Mr. Kennedy’s first match since WrestleMania | Mr. Kennedy is in action

WWE Tag Team Championship | The Bluebloods vs. The Basham Brothers



***

‘Coulda’ Been a Contender'

***

SmackDown will be posted tomorrow.
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Old 08-09-2009, 04:29 PM   #548 (permalink)
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Default Re: Legend Presents: WWE 2006 - Stop Your Grinnin' And Drop Your Linen

This definitely looks like an interesting show, if only to find out what's going on with Edge. The preview has pretty much detailed all of the rivalries, and it should be great to see what happens next in all of them, though as I said, the World Heavyweight Championship situation is definitely something I'm looking forward to seeing.

Tag Title match looks good too, even if it it The Basham Brothers (ugh). Should at least be a good defence for The Bluebloods.

The rest of the show will no doubt be explosive as you have a lot of heated rivalries going on right now. Looking forward to seeing in what direction you take those, especially what match Lashley and Heyman will choose for Judgment Day.

Show looks good following up from that epic PPV quality show last week. I look forward to it.
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Old 08-09-2009, 04:52 PM   #549 (permalink)
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Default Re: Legend Presents: WWE 2006 - Stop Your Grinnin' And Drop Your Linen

Definitely going to be a show that will give us some answers, as the World Title picture can go pretty much anywhere. I expect that to take up the majority of the show. Also, I have to expect that Lashley will be announcing his stipulation with 'Taker. Some solid matches booked, as I see the Bluebloods retaining and also Kennedy looking dominant.

Double review to come after SD! is posted .
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Default Re: Legend Presents: WWE 2006 - Stop Your Grinnin' And Drop Your Linen

Friday Night SmackDown! - May 5th, 2006; Cincinnati, Ohio

Do you realise what the hell you’ve just done!?”



Coulda’ Been a Contender



Before SmackDown! officially comes on the air, we find ourselves backstage in the U.S Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio, inside the plush General Manager’s office; or, to be more accurate, the interim General Manager’s office. Reclining on one of the black leather couches, dressed in a dark Armani suit, left arm still draped in a sling, Shane McMahon watches the monitor closely, sipping a glass of scotch with his working hand.


Across the room, looking lovely yet business-like in a low-cut dress-suit and skirt, hair tied back, Stephanie McMahon’s eyes flick between the screen and her conflicted brother:

“As we welcome you all to another exciting edition of Friday Night SmackDown, Edge is STILL the World Heavyweight Champion, and we STILL have no Number One Contender.”

~ Taking another sip of his drink, Shane sucks his teeth, rasping at the words of Michael Cole, while Stephanie turns her attentions entirely on her elder sibling, trying to read his reactions to events.

“YOU THINK YOU KNOW ME”

~ Shane SLAMS his scotch down on the table, as the World Heavyweight Champion appears on the screen, along with Lita, heading for the ring…

Shane McMahon: (Muttering) Speak of the devil.

~ Sighing, rolling her eyes like any woman would, Steph marches over, standing directly in front of the television set, obstructing her older brother’s viewer, drawing an irritated glance from The Boy Wonder.

Stephanie McMahon: What are you going to do?

Shane McMahon:
(Shaking his glass) Thought I might drink a little scotch.

~ Steph clucks her teeth, as Shane O’ Mac smirks.

Stephanie McMahon: Yeah, yeah that’s real smart, Shane. Why don’t you just stay backstage and get wasted while I try to actually run this show for Dad? Or better yet, why don’t you go making stupid matches again without consulting me?

~ After an initial frown, like any brother would, Shane simply grins petulantly in his little sister’s face, pushing his drink aside, placing his hood arm behind his head and reclining arrogantly on the couch.

Shane McMahon: I like the sound of that.

~ Stephanie turns, pointing at the television.

Stephanie McMahon: Go out there.

~ … … … … … Shane just stares right back at his sister.

Stephanie McMahon: Just go out there and put all this to bed.

Shane McMahon:
(Taking another sip) We’ll see.

~ Reaching over, milking his injury for all it’s worth, Shane grabs his jacket from the nearby chair, pulling out his cell phone.

Shaking her pretty head, unsatisfied by her brother’s course of action, Stephanie switches the monitor off, as Shane flips open his phone and dials.


Heading over to their office door, Steph pulls it open, sticks her head out to have a quick scan, before breathing a sigh of relief and heading on out. No sooner does Ms. McMahon exit her office and turn right … does she bump into John Bradshaw Layfield, clad in a black suit, hatless, standing in wait with a dark look on his face.

Stephanie McMahon: (Checks her watch, smirking) You’re early, John.

John Bradshaw Layfield:
You had better be on your way to give Edge some bad news.

~ The former WWE Champion eyeballs The Billion Dollar Princess threateningly.

Stephanie McMahon: Well I guess you’ll have to wait and see, huh?

~ JBL stiffens up at being brushed aside so casually, throwing daggers at the youngest McMahon child with his eyes, as the billionaire daughter strides out of her office and down the hallway confidently, beginning the long trek to the ring. As she walks, followed by Bradshaw’s callous eyes, several more individuals watch her, all eager to await their decision for the controversial World Heavyweight Champion…

*Ringside*


His music having only just ended, the egomaniacal World Heavyweight Champion, ‘The Rated R Superstar Edge, clad in jeans, a dark t-shirt, and shades, with his title belt over his shoulder, and Lita at his side, holds a microphone in his hand.

Edge: Can you… (flabbergasted, pointing up at the titantron) can you believe this?

~ A rip-roarin’ “YOU SUCK!” chant breaks out at the mere sound of Edge’s voice, as he gestures up at the screen, a look of complete annoyance on his usually arrogant face, his title belt shimmering on his left shoulder …

Edge: (Looking around at the booing masses) SHUUUT UP!

~ “BOOOOOO!!!” comes the cry fast and furiously from the Cincinnati faithful, with the World Champion grinding his pearly white teeth together angrily.

Edge: (Waving them off) No, no, see you don’t get to silence me anymore, not anymore!


~ The WWE fans would disagree, Champ. The Rated R Superstar can barely get a word in edge ways [/pun], as the thousands in attendance continue to drown him in heat. Lita walks around the ring, screaming, “Shut up” at them all.


Edge: No, no, (shaking head) not after the year I’ve had, not after becoming the first man in a year to beat, to dethrone “The Animal” Dave Batista… not after last week, not after beating… (closes eyes) … THE UNDERTAKER!

~ TREMENDOUS mixed reaction for this comment, as the audience ROARS for both The Animal and The Phenom, but at the same time boos what Edge has done to them both.

Edge: Now, I’ll bet you were all real excited about coming to SmackDown this week weren’t cha’? When you spent a month’s wages of your pathetic, worthless jobs to get these tickets, I bet you were really looking forward to tonight, huh?

~ Edge goofily wags his head up and down, asking, “Huh? Yeah? Huh?”

Edge: I bet you all thought that after all the tears you were forced to cry after WrestleMania when I put The Animal out of his misery, you thought tonight you were gonna’ be treated to a new World Champion… a Deadman Champion. Go on, admit it.

~ A sudden “UNDERTAKER” chant reaches The Ultimate Opportunist’s ears–

Edge: (Suddenly screaming) … WRONG!!

~ Lita laughs, as Edge moves erratically around the ring.

Edge: WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRRRRONG! You were all WRONG!! (Leaning over the ropes) You were wrong, (points) you were wrong, fatty, you too, sweetheart. All of you. WRONG!!

~ THUNDEROUS heat for the World Heavyweight Champion, as he calms down.

Edge: (Relieved) But… y’know who was most wrong of all? I’ll give you a clue. He’s the sanctimonious, hypocritical, self-promoting son of a b**tch sat in the back right now!

~ OH!; The crowd responds with shock at Edge’s rage, as the unstable champion rakes his fingers down the left hand side of his face, grimacing up the ramp.

Edge: Oh yeah, yeah, that’s right, Shane O, I’m talking to you. (Into the hard camera) You wanna’ put me in a match with that -- that psychopath!? (Smirks) Fine by me, boss.

~ Edge turns to Lita, both of them grinning cockily.

Edge: Yeah, it’s fine by me, Mr. McMahon, ‘cause y’see I’ve had – I’ve had an epiphany since last week, and it goes a little something like this… … how many people walking the face of the earth today can say they’ve defeated Batista and The Undertaker, the – two – most – dominant forces in the WWE, in back to back championship matches?

~ Edge pauses, looking into the crowd.

Edge: Any clues? Any ideas? No? Huh? No? Well I’ll tell ya’… … just one, ME, that’s who!

~ “EDGE SUCKS!” “EDGE SUCKS!” “EDGE SUCKS!” “EDGE SUCKS!” overwhelms the U.S Bank Arena once again, with Edge lapping it up.


Edge: I(Head back, eyes closed) am now THE MOST DOMINANT CHAMPION… OF ALL TIME!! I am now the true Animal -- the true Phenom of the WWE, and there isn’t a damn thing anyone can do about it.

~ Crowd boos as a slight “Batista” chant echoes down.

Edge: So, so to all you potential challengers out there stupid enough to have your eyes set on me, it’s not Batista or The Undertaker you have to worry about any more. You should all now live in fear(crazy face) … of the Rated R Superstar.

~ Grinning from ear to ear, Edge looks on as Lita caresses his shoulders sensuously.

Edge: So, and this goes straight to you, Boy Wonder(into hard camera) you can keep throwing all the monsters you want at me, Shane, but you’re gonna’ have to get used to the fact that your time is over… (smirks, pointing to himself) … there’s a new giant killer in town.

~ Edge has his fans, and they pop rather loudly for this announcement.

Edge: It doesn’t matter if you’re 7-feet, 5-feet, 500 pounds, 100 pounds… (takes off his shades) the fact still remains… … we are all now living… in an Era… that is Rated… R.

~ Lowering his microphone, Edge pops his shades back on, takes Lita by the hand and pulls her in sexily, gazing into one another’s eyes as the crowd jeers them raucously.









“BOOYAKA BOOYAKA 619”



Cincinnati ERUPTS with a great ovation, while the look on Edge’s face can only be described as repulsive. Turning slowly, the World Champion and his girlfriend watch as the U.S. Champion REY MYSTERIO emerges; black vest, white tights, white mask and title belt in check, making for the ring. Rey slaps hands with his fans, before stepping through the ropes, and standing toe to-toe with the champ.

Edge: WHAT THE… (Running his hands through his manically, pacing) WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE, REY!? Oh -- oh I get it; they couldn’t let me get all this air-time to myself, huh!?


~ Rey, still without a microphone, just runs a hand across his jaw, staring up at the much taller World Heavyweight Champion, not saying a word.

Edge: (Suddenly holding a finger up) Wait, wait, wait, I see what this is about. (Puts on a patronizing voice) Rey, Rey, buddy, when I was talking about it not mattering how big you are… (puts hand by his waist) you still have to be this tall to go on this ride!

~ Boos from the crowd, as Mysterio lets out a little smile, faux applauding Edge.

Edge: Wait; don’t tell me, I think I’ve got it. (Smirks) … You’re out here to defend the honor of your buddy, “Big” Dave Batista, right?

~ Lita giggles at her man’s side, while Rey-Rey remains silent.

Edge: (Turning to the crowd) Oh, it’s – it’s okay, folks, Batista needs midgets to do his dirty work for him now. Can anyone remember the last time he actually won a match?

~ The crowd boos loudly as the World Champion laughs it up some more. Nodding slowly, Mysterio moves across the ring, waving at Tony Chimel, and is soon handed a mic.

Rey Mysterio: (Turning back to Edge) No, you got it all wrong, homes, I’m not out here to rain on your parade, Edge. I actually came out here to say… … congratulations.

~ HUGE heat from Cincinnati, as Edge grins, and Rey asks them to “Hear me out”

Rey Mysterio: You’re right – you’re right, Edge, you have done something no one’s ever done before. You beat ‘Taker and Dave back to back, something I knew you had in you all those years ago when we were tag team partners, bro. Remember that?

~ Edge lets out a bit of a smirk, before he brings the mic up.

Edge: (Scratches his chin) Why yes, Rey, I do. Don’t be surprised if I don’t thank you for reminding me, ‘cause y’see I’ve spent the better part of four years trying to erase that part of my career from my mind -- y’know, the part of my career I spent carrying a Mexican midget on my back… (scowls) and… getting precisely nothing in return.

~ More heat pours down from the rafters of the U.S Bank Arena, as the ungracious Rated R Superstar sneers. Rey-Rey though, doesn’t seem too fazed by this hideous disrespect.

Rey Mysterio: (Nodding) That’s fair, that’s fair. I can see now, you’re obviously in a different league from me, Edge. I’m not in your class. You’ve had to defend… (points to the World title) that against two of the biggest and baddest around.


~ Edge nods his head in agreement.

Rey Mysterio: So, y’know what I was thinking? I was thinking, “Edge, why don’t you, at Judgment Day, take the night off?” Think about it, you won’t even have to break a sweat, amigo… … (looks back) ‘cause defending the title against a “joke” of a United States Champion would be a walk in the park, right?

~ The crowd pops at the sound of that as Edge’s jaw tightens somewhat, finding himself being backed into a rather tight corner by the U.S Champ. Mysterio continues…

Rey Mysterio: (In Edge’s face) So whaddya’ say… … champ?

~ The crowd begins to buzz, as Edge turns a beet-red.

Edge:
(Holding out his hand) So–so what, we’re just handing out title shots to anyone now, is that it? At least ‘Taker was undefeated until last week. What exactly have you done since WrestleMania, Rey?

~ Mysterio shakes his head, even though Edge has a fair point.

Edge:
(Counting on his fingers) You got beat down by those two English morons.

~ TREMENDOUS heat for the mere mention of the WWE Tag Team Champions, The Bluebloods, though Edge remains focused on his list.

Edge: (Onto his second finger) Then, after you somehow wormed your way into a tag team title shot with fellow Short Round wannabe Noble as your partner, you still ended up getting your ass kicked… and losing. That’s real good so far, Rey.

~ Rey continues to eyeball The Rated R Superstar, not rising to it.

Edge:
Then last week you lost to Finlay… again.

~ Heat for the Irishman.

Edge:
(Laughing) I – I mean really, I think even Funaki’s ahead of you in the line for a shot at… (rubs his belt) this baby. Well, at least you can take comfort in one thing. (Grins) You’re still ahead of Batista. (Turning to the crowd) I mean seriously, when was the last time he won a match?


~ Big time heat. Edge, smiling, slowly turns back to Rey-Rey

Edge: So to answer your question… (pauses) hmm, lemme’ think… … uh, NO, no, I don’t think I’ll be defending my title against you at Judgment Day or anytime soon, Rey-Rey.

~ BOOMING heat for the cowardice of The Master Manipulator, as he gives Mysterio a big cheese-eating grin, smug as you like, right in his face.

Rey Mysterio: (Nodding his head) That’s cool, that’s cool, it doesn’t matter. I figured you’d be too scared to face me anyway.


~ Edge’s face drops.

Edge: WHAT!? WHAT!? SCA – SCARED!? I’m not – I’m not afraid of you, monkey man, I’m a giant killer, you understand that!? A, GI ANT, KILLER!!

~ Loud boos for this unflappable arrogance, with Edge leaning down right in the smaller man’s face, teeth bared, with his red-haired babe of a girlfriend backing him up.

Edge: You know what giant killer’s do to little insects, pathetic parasites like you, Rey? (Lifts up his boot) We… (slams it down) … SQUASH you into the ground, just like that.


~ A smirk actually escaped through the mask of Mysterio, irritating Edge further.

Edge: (Breathing hard) I – I am the greatest champion to ever grace a wrestling ring. I’ve done things that you, Rey, and these morons can only dream about. I was the very first Mr. Money in the Bank, I won the World Heavyweight Championship in my very first WrestleMania main event, and I did it by beating a man who many had hailed as UN, BEAT, ABLE, Batista. (Getting right in Rey’s face) And just last week I did what only a select few have been able to do before me, what even that ‘Flavour of the Month’ Bobby Lashley couldn’t do… … I BEAT… … THE UNDERTAKER!!

~ THUNDEROUS heat, as the comedy seems to have died inside Edge for now.

Edge: So, and let me be perfectly clear when I say this, Rey… (icy cold whisper) there is no one, and I mean NO ONE… … out there good enough… … to face… … me.

~ The World Heavyweight and United States Champions go face to face (or as close as Rey can get), with neither man backing down an inch






“CAN YOU DIG IT, SUCKA?”



Michael Cole:
NOW WHAT!?

Heat fills the U.S Bank Arena, as, clad in a swanky looking grey pin-stripe suit, already clutching a mic in his hands, applauding, Booker T walks out onto the stage, along with his wife, Sharmell. The 5-time World Champion swaggers down to the ring, cupping the mic in his hands as though it were a royal goblet, whilst Sharmell, wearing a long black gown herself, complete with fur coat, holds her left pinkie and chin high in the air.

Booker T: Bravo… (faux applause, talking over his music) Bravo, Edge. Bravo, Reymont.

Calmly, meticulously allowing his wife to sit on the bottom rope for him, Booker T makes his way into the ring.

Booker T: A charming performance from you both, and… (looking at the fans) … and as I am sure that all of these mere… rodents would agree, a most entertaining display of repartee between two gentlemen.

~ Licking his lips, Book takes another step towards them, only for Rey-Rey to cross the void for him, getting right in the face of The Book Man. Cole gives us an, “Uh oh.”

Booker T: (Avoiding Rey’s gaze) But I assure you, there is only one man… resplendent enough to compete for the Worlds Heavyweight Championship.

~ Edge shakes his head, “And who would that be?”

Booker T: And that one man… (ignoring Edge) his record against the two of you, Edge and Reymont Mysterio, is almost absolutely, positively… … flawless.

~ Mysterio raises an eyebrow, as Cole gives us a, “Gimme’ a break”

Booker T: What has occurred in the past between us, shall remain in the past between us and only us. Despite your plethora of challengers, Edge, despite your plethora of suitors, it is unquestionable; everyone knows the next challenger for the World Heavyweight title should be I… … (closes his eyes in ecstasy) … … BOOKAHHH!!!!

~ Huge heat for the idea of this, as Sharmell applauds wildly, and Rey shakes his head with disgust. Edge doesn’t look too impressed by the notion either, until Book turns to him.

Booker T: You see, Edge, you see I concur with you henceforth; it matters not what these… (waves his arm around the arena) … these peasants think!

~ Edge cocks his head.

Booker T: I have slain David Batista… just as you have. (Grins arrogantly) I have even… made the self-proclaimed “Animal”… … (intense) BA’ DOWN… and kiss, ma’, royal, feet.

~ More boos

Booker T: So, therefore… I say… on this day… (holding his arm in the air) … May Fifth Two, Zero, Zero, Six… I hereby challenge… (turns back to Edge) you… for the Worl’ Heavyweight Champions–


“MY NAME IS FINLAY, AND I LOVE TO FIGHT”



Tazz: The hits just keep on comin’, baby!!


Booker is stopped in his tracks, drawing an irritated look from the pretentious one, as he, Edge, and Mysterio all turn to stare up the ramp, where ‘The Fighting Irishman’ Finlay strolls out to the head of the ramp, dressed to compete, holding a microphone in one hand and his deadly yet trusty shillelagh in the other.

Finlay: HEY, REY! (Shouting over his music for a moment) Rey, Booker, since neither of you fellas have been ‘round anywhere near as long as I have, and since none o’ seem to have anythin’ upstairs, lemme’ explain somethin’ to the pair o’ ye.

~ The Irishman approaches the ring slowly, being jeered by the fans at ringside, while Rey Mysterio in particular glowers at him from the ring.

Finlay: (Pointing to himself) I’ve been around this business the longest, I’ve won more titles than you’ve had hot dinners… (Runs a hand across his jaw) In this place, I was undefeated for over four months. Forget about The Undertaker… (gap-toothed grin) … ye’ lookin’ at the first man to defeat Bobby Lashley -- inside a Steel Cage no less -- right here. Oh, and I hold… (holds up his fingers) three pin fall victories over you, Rey.

~ We get a close-up of the United States Champion, who shakes his head ruefully. The Irishman climbs the ring steps.

Finlay: (Walking along the apron) But most importantly… most importantly, unlike everyone else in this ring, I’ve never had a shot… (points to Edge) at that title right there.

~ Edge glances down at his belt nervously, as Finlay steps through the ropes.

Finlay: The bottom line, Edge, is this, these guys (waving his arm at Rey and Booker) can argue all they want, but the truth is…

~ The Fighting Irishman steps towards Edge.

Finlay: … … the cold, hard truth is that no one on this roster… (prodding Edge with his shillelagh) … no one deserves a World Heavyweight Title shot…

~ The dangerous shillelagh begins to creep up Edge’s chest, being watched all the way.

Finlay: … More… than m–



***I WALK ALONE***


The U.S Bank Arena ERUPTS with a DEAFENING ovation, with the four men inside the ring turning to face the stage: Mysterio seems cool with it; Booker and Finlay seem annoyed more than anything, and Edge looks like he’d like to be anywhere other than Cincinnati, Ohio, as ‘The Animal’ Dave Batista emerges atop.

Michael Cole: And HERE – COMES – THE ANIMAL!!

Tazz:
The FORMER World Heavyweight Champion Batista has issues with all four of these men in the ring right now, not least the man with the gold. Gotta’ remember, it was Big Dave who Edge beat at WrestleMania little over a month ago to win the World title, but since then Finlay has cost The Animal a number of matches, icludin’ one with Booker.

Michael Cole:
Talk about the wrong kind of party, Tazz.


~ Wearing his wrestling attire, but with a close-fitting, black ‘Unleashed Rage’ t-shirt over the top, ‘Tista makes his way down to the ring, stoic and cold.

Edge: (Nervously) Look, Dave
-

~ REY KNOCKS THE MIC FROM EDGE’S HAND!
The audience goes CRAZY, popping like mad, as Edge turns to the U.S Champion, “What the hell was that?” with Rey simply responding with an inclination of his head towards the approaching Animal, who is up on the apron, about the enter. Booker nervously edges backward, getting behind Finlay, who seems unfazed by Big Dave, who holds a microphone in one hand. He enters the ring…


Batista: (Suddenly marching right up to Finlay) Go on. Hit me again. Hit me again, I dare you. See what happens. See where I stick that shillelagh, you goofy son of a b**tch
!

~ The crowd “OH’s”, as does an amused Booker T while Finlay simply smirks at the former champion.

Batista: You find somethin’ funny, slick? Huh? (Eye bugging out of his head) Lemme’ tell you I’m gonna’ find funny; it’s gonna’ be funny when I stick my fist straight down your throat, beat your ass, and then beat… (to Booker) your ass… and then kick (looks over at Edge) your ass to take back my World Heavyweight Title!!

~ A HUGE pop greets this, as Edge looks extremely taken aback, not liking his current predicament at all. Running his fingers through his hair, the Rated R Superstar glances at Mysterio, before cautiously crouching down and retrieving his microphone. Batista stays right near Finlay, the two brawlers eyeballing one another, while Booker looks on. Edge takes a deep breath…

Edge:
(Stammering) L – Look, Dave, you gotta’ understand something
-

Batista: I think I understand everything I need to, champ.


~ Edge grimaces, going silent for the moment, as The Animal takes a step back.

Batista: (Glowering at Edge) I “understand” that you are the most gutless bastard who’s ever been champion.

~ OH!; Cincinnati erupts for The Animal once again, as Edge’s face drops, having taken his fair share of insults tonight. He clutches to his belt. ‘Tista steps towards a wary Booker T.

Batista: I understand that no matter how you try to sound, everything that comes out of your mouth, Booker… (leans in) is complete… bulls**t!

~ Booker throws a hissy fit, yelling, “AWW HELL NAW” as Sharmell tries to calm her man, with Deacon Dave heading back to Finlay.


Batista: …And as for you, Dave. (The two go nose to nose) I understand that you wanna’ make a name for yourself in these parts, impress the boss and all that crap, but that fact remains… … (intense) you just signed your own death warrant, pal.

~ Boom. Batista drops his microphone to the canvas with a thud. The crowd lets out another thunderous pop as The Animal angrily glares ahead at the Irishman, the time for talking seemingly over, with Edge, Booker, and Rey backing away from the two bulls…








“HERE COMES THE MONEY!!!”



Michael Cole: You gotta’ be kidding me!!


A VERY mixed reaction fills the arena, catching the attention of the ragtag bunch in the ring (though it takes Batista and Finlay a while longer), as Shane McMahon appears on the stage, sling and all, holding a microphone in his working hand, beaming arrogantly.

Tazz: You gotta’ love Shane O’ Mac.

Michael Cole: Normally I’d agree with you, partner, but after last week…

Tazz:
You’d be like that too if your employees kept attackin’ you.


Showing no trepidation whatsoever, Shane O’ Mac begins to walk down the ramp towards the ring … until Stephanie McMahon quickly rushes out from the back, blocking his path, telling him to, “don’t be stupid, Shane, you’re in a bad enough way as it is.” McMahon looks rather offended by his younger sister’s protective manner, eyeing up the individuals in the ring - in particular the two men who have put their hands on him in recent weeks, Edge and Batista. Taking a step back, Shane returns to the stage, holding his hands in the air, smiling sarcastically at Steph, “Is this okay with you?” She simply sighs and nods her head dejectedly.

Michael Cole: That’s the first smart thing Shane McMahon’s done in weeks.

Tazz:
You mean like the SmackDown Election?

Michael Cole:
You know what I meant, Tazz.

~ The two siblings look at one another for a moment, as Shane’s music fades in the background, and the elder McMahon steps forward (though taking extra care not to appear as though he is heading for the ring), bringing his microphone up to his lips, pointing down to the ring…


Shane McMahon: (Wagging his finger) Gentlemen, guys, fellas, there’s no need for violence, (smirks) despite how much as I’d enjoy seeing Finlay kick your ass, Batista.

~ Big Dave takes a step towards the rope, mouthing, “Is that right?”

Shane McMahon: tonight anyway. Next week? (Nods thoughtfully) Next week sounds much better to me, so how about it? Next week, one-on-one, first time ever… Finlay… versus Batista?


~ Batista and Finlay leer at one another, neither man backing down an inch.

Shane McMahon: (Smirking) But wait, it gets even better. As well as that match next week, we’re going to have ourselves a little… WrestleMania Rematch. (Points past Edge) It’s going to be you, Rey defending your United States Title against the man you took it from… Booker… T.

~ The crowd pops at the sound of that, and Booker lets out a little smirk, letting Mysterio know that he “Stole muh’ damn belt mo’ like.” Edge continues to applaud happily.

Edge: Y’know, Shane, (laughing a bit) y’know, maybe I was wrong about yo
-

Shane McMahon: (Holding up his hand) Hold the phone there, Edge. I’m not quite done.


~ The sound of excitement rumbles through the crowd, with Edge’s eyes opening that little bit wider, swallowing nervously at the furtive undertone in Shane’s voice.

Shane McMahon: See, see all that – that’s all about next week. (Looks around the arena) We’ve still got tonight to worry about, haven’t we?

~ Stephanie raises an eyebrow.

Edge: (Gritting his teeth) What about tonight, huh, Shane?

~ Watching McMahon intently, Edge pulls at his long hair. Shane O’ smiles.

Shane McMahon: Well, I might not like any of the guys in the ring with you right now, Edge, but they do have a point… … we do need a number one contender. Undertaker and Bobby Lashley? They’re involved in their own thing for Judgment Day, so that rules the two of them out, which leaves… … (sighs, looking at the ring) … … you four.


~ Booker smirks

Shane McMahon: Tonight – Tonight we will find out who will be competing against you,Edge, at Judgment Day, for the World Heavyweight title. (Pacing) See, we’re going to have ourselves a little tag team match. On one side of the ring it’ll be “The Animal” Dave Batista {crowd pops} and the United States Champion Rey Mysterio {crowd pops}, and on the other it will be Booker T {heat}, Finlay {heat}… … and the World Heavyweight Champion EDGE!

~ The crowd explodes at the sound of that mega main event, while Michael points out the obvious, “That sounds like a handicap match to me.”

Shane McMahon:
(Finger) But… with a special “Shane O’ Mac style” stipulation.

~ Edge looks terrified, as the other four men wait with baited breath.

Shane McMahon: Whoever gets the winning pin fall in that match… will go on to Judgment Day… to face Edge… for the World, Heavyweight, Championship.

~ Edge blows a gasket, screaming, “WHAT!? WHAT!?” over and over again, while his four potential challengers each have a little smirk, their eyes jumping from man to man.

Shane McMahon: BUT… but you have some incentive too, Edge.

~ The two men look into the eyes of one another.

Shane McMahon: Should you pick up the fall tonight, then all four men… (pointing each time) Booker, Rey, Batista, and Finlay… will take part in a number one contender’s match at Judgment Day with the winner facing you later on in the main event.

~ A TREMENDOUS mixed reaction for that, as Edge stops whining for the moment.

Shane McMahon: So, uh… best of luck? (Smirks) Yeah, best of luck, gentlemen.

~ After a satisfied intake of breath, the extremely confident and unpredictable McMahon steps backwards, grinning at his rather … impressed looking sister, heading towards the back, before stopping momentarily, raising his microphone…

Shane McMahon: Oh, and, Finlay? … … carry on…

~ FINLAY GRABS BATISTA BY THE ARM, SPINS HIM AROUND, AND NAILS THE FORMER WORLD CHAMPION -- THE ANIMAL – RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES WITH THE DAMN SHILLELAGH!!!

The U.S Bank Arena ERUPTS with heat, as Mysterio quickly makes a beeline for the Irishman, only for Finlay to quickly to get the hell out of dodge, rolling from the ring quick as a hiccup, along with (on opposite sides) Booker and Edge, leaving The Animal unconscious.


Michael Cole: WHAT THE HELL!?







{Commercials}


Michael Cole: (Footage plays over the top)Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen, just moments ago Batista got so carried away with Shane McMahon’s huge announcement of the three-on-two handicap Number One Contender’s match later tonight that he turned his back on that damn Irish bastard, Finlay!

Tazz: I’ll you somethin’, Cole, I would not wanna’ be Dave Finlay right about now.

1 - ‘The Notorious K.I.D’ Kid Kash vs. Shannon Moore

The newly announced Number One Contender to the Cruiserweight Championship, the man who lost the strap just over a month ago at WrestleMania, Kid Kash is in action for only the second time since that day, sporting his new look of silvery trunks rather than full-length tights of old (think The Brian Kendrick or Chris Jericho) and his rather fetching goatee beard, as he tackles Shannon Moore.

Young Moore is game, there can be no denying that, perhaps hopeful that a victory over a former champion and current #1 Contender will earn him a shot down the road, but in the end, KK is just too good for his junior. Despite even doing his usual arrogant preening and showboating every chance he gets, Kash still has no trouble putting the former M’Fer away, as he first avoids Moore’s moonsault attempt, forcing the Resident Reject to land on his feet, before Kid quickly nails a 360 degree running Tornado DDT, dropping Moore right on his head!! Smirking, KK follows this up with a lightning fast DEAD LEVEL, before coming off the top rope with the eye-catching DOUBLE-JUMP MOONSAULT for the three.

Winner - Kid Kash via pinfall @ 4:29.


Kash doesn’t just get back up to his feet, he NIPS back up to his feet, arrogantly holding his arms out by his side, as he saunters around the ring, performing little bows to all sides of the arena, getting quite the mixed reaction for once.

KK decide enough is enough and turns to leave -- into a DOUBLE LEG FROM JAMIE NOBLE!!!

The crowd ROARS as the Cruiserweight Champion of the World knocks the man he beat for the title at WrestleMania onto his ass, before pounding away on him with rights and lefts!! Kash manages to wriggle free though, scrambling back up to his feet in desperation.

Noble throws a chop, but Kash smartly ducks it. Noble throws another chop, which KK avoids again, kicking the Pit-bull in the gut, looking for the MONEY MAKER -- but Noble counters, GETTING KASH ONTO HIS SHOULDERS -- but Kash quickly drops off, and flies from the ring!!

The heat pours in for The Notorious K.I.D now, as he arrogantly brushes over the fans at ringside, declaring that “He ain’t worth it”, pointing back at a fuming Jamie Noble, who continues to pace around the ring like a wild man.


{Commercials}


*Cut to video*

Inter-cutting shots flash across the screen of a young superstar, clad in black trunks with shoulder length dark hair and a small beard. He stands in front of a blank screen, holding up his knuckles, adorned with the words, “D-R-U-G … F-R-E-E”…

???: I don’t drink …

Narrator: He is the most exciting superstar to ever hit professional wrestling …

- A shot of the man flying through the ropes with a topé suicida…

???: I don’t smoke …

Narrator: His skills range from Muay Thai Kickboxing to Brazilian Jujitsu …

- Shots of the man delivering scintillating kicks to his hopeless opponents…

???: I don’t do drugs …

Narrator: He’s been a champion everywhere he’s been …

- Shots of the man holding the OVW Championship aloft…

???: My only addiction is competition …

Narrator: He’s a “Straightedge Superstar” …

- More flashing shots of the man wowing crowd all around the world…

???: My name … is C … M … PUNK!!!

- Punk throws his hair back, looking into the camera with steely eyes…

Narrator: And he’s coming … to Friday Night SmackDown!

“CM PUNK - COMING SOON TO FRIDAY NIGHT SMACKDOWN!”

*Video Ends*


Michael Cole: Welcome back to Friday Night SmackDown!, everyone, and just before the commercial break (the footage plays)things continued to get out of hand between the Cruiserweight Champion Jamie Noble and the former champion Kid Kash.

Tazz: Yeah, a solid win for Kid Kash over Shannon Moore, but then Jamie Noble come outta’ nowhere to try and get him some o’ The Notorious K.I.D; these two me hate each other’s guts, Cole.

Michael Cole: And right now our broadcast colleague Josh Matthews is standing by with one of those men, the Cruiserweight Champion, Jamie Noble.


*Backstage*

Josh Matthews stands by, microphone in hand.

Josh Matthews: Ladies and gentlemen, my guest at this time … the Cruiserweight Champion of the World … JAMIE NOBLE!!

~ The crowd cheers as Jamie Noble comes into screenshot, wearing the same black t-shirt he had on earlier, and still breathing heavily.

Josh Matthews: Jamie, just moments ago we saw you attack Kid Kash following his match with Shannon Moore, this following on from the numerous attacks Kash himself has inflicted on you since losing the title at WrestleMania. With Stephanie McMahon signing the rematch the whole world wants to see for Judgment Day, how will you be able to control yourself until then?

Jamie Noble: (Breathing hard) Kash, maybe Jamie Noble didn’t make himself clear a couple o’ weeks back when e’ said it, so lemme’ jus’ reiterate what a’ meant. Boy, at WrestleMania, that was just phase one, that was just me takin’ the Cruiserweight title from a worthless, no-good piece o’ trash like you and ruinin’ your life.


~ The crowd pops in the background.

Jamie Noble: But that’s all in the past, ol’ Jamie Noble has already done that. (Grits his teeth) Now it’s about payback, now it’s about payin’ your ass back for all those times you left me lyin’ in a pool of ma’ own blood, Kash. Ya’ understand?

~ Noble runs a hand through his hair.

Jamie Noble: So as for Judgment Day, Kash… Jamie Noble ain’t just gonna’ beatcha’, a’ ain’t just gonna’ pin ya’ shoulders like a’ did at WrestleMania to take the title. No, no, ya’ little bastard, this time it’s about more than just gold. (Looks right into the camera) This time it’s personal… an’ I’m gonna’ hurt you.


~ The crowd pops as Noble shakes his head, and heads off camera. Matthews nods as he goes, eyes rather wide, following the impressive intensity of the champion.

*Ringside*

2 - WWE Tag Team Championship Match
The Bluebloods defend against The Basham Brothers

After their mutual alliance last week to take out both MNM and The Hooligans, these are really the only teams left to compete for the belts right now, making an awkward heel vs. heel contest. There’s no more camaraderie between the teams tonight though, as Regal and Burchill attack Doug and Danny Basham before the bell, knocking Danny out of the ring, followed by a series of stereo knee strikes, wiping Doug out, before the referee finally gets the veteran Regal to leave the ring.


With Doug and Burchill the two legal men, The Ripper sends the former Secretary Of Defence into the corner, before racing in -- Doug catches him with a back elbow, knocking Burchill backward, before charging out -- caught by Burchill, who HURLS Doug over with a beautiful OVERHEAD RELEASE BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX!!

After scoring a near fall, Burchill drags Doug up and throws him into the corner of The Bluebloods, before making as though the attack Danny on the apron, prompting the official to hurry over an intervene … allowing Regal to go to town on the Basham Brother illegally, delivering a series of stiff left-hands, as well as raking his eyes across the top rope! The crowd doesn’t really know what to think, as Burchill goes back to work, assaulting Doug Basham, before sending him into the ropes, lowering his head -- KICK TO THE HEAD from Doug, followed by a big shoulder tackler take down!! Doug quickly brings in his brother, Danny, holding Burchill up, allowing Danny to get in some free shots. Doug leaves the ring, allowing Danny to have his way with the youngest man in the match, before sending young Ripper across the ring into the corner, looking for the SPLASH -- BURCHILL MOVES!!

With Danny now stunned, Burchill brings in the veteran of the unit, William Regal, and the two proud Englishmen each hook an arm of Danny’s, before HURLING HIM OVER with a textbook DOUBLE-TEAM DOUBLE-ARM SUPLEX!! Burchill exits and Regal scores another near fall for the champions. Bringing Danny back up, Regal lays into the younger (and bigger) man with some of the stiffest shots in wrestling, throwing in a few head-butts too.

After this assault in the corner, Regal goes for the Irish Whip -- Danny reverses it, sending the former European and Intercontinental Champion into the buckle. The Basham races in, right into a BOOT TO THE FACE!! He staggers away and Regal runs (or jogs; Regal’s too awesome to run) past him into the ropes, looking for the RUNNING KNEE STRIKE -- but Danny scoops him up, NAILING A QUICK POWERSLAM!! This time it’s Danny Basham going for a cover–

BRIAN KENDRICK BREAKS IT UP!! The referee calls for the bell.

Winner - The Basham Brothers via disqualification @ 3:06.

The crowd cheers, not caring in the slightest that this match has abruptly ended, as Spanky BEATS THE HELL OUT OF BOTH REGAL AND BASHAM!! Burchill immediately tries to enter the ring … but is grabbed from behind, and HURLED INTO THE CROWD BARRICADE BY PAUL LONDON, DRIVING THE BACK OF HIS HEAD INTO THE WALL!!!

Scared blind by the attack, Doug Basham quickly hops off the apron and begins to back up the ramp with his hands on his head -- MNM, JOEY MERSURY AND JOHNNY NITRO, ATTACK DOUG FROM BEHIND, beating him down on the entrance ramp, bringing security rushing out to try and put an end to this HUGE MELEÉ, with the tag division imploding.



*Backstage*

‘The Book Man’ Booker T shadow boxes in front of the mirror, as Sharmell watches on proudly … until the World Heavyweight Champion EDGE strolls in, Lita by his side, causing Book to stop suddenly, whirling around aggressively.

Booker T: (Squaring up) What is the meaning of this – this intrusion!?

Edge:
(Holds hands up) Relax, bro. Just here to talk tactics.

Booker T: TACTICS!? TACTICS!? (Sharmell calms him down) How dare – I’ll tell ya’ what muh’ tactics are after I beat yo’ punk ass fo’ da’ title at Judgment Day, ya’ dig, bro!?

Edge:
(Raising an eyebrow) Is that – is that your real accent?

Booker T:
Muh’ real accent? (Flabbergasted) ‘Da hell you talkin’ ‘bout, Edge, what ‘de hell ‘dis have ta’ do wit’ muh’ accent?

Edge: (Waving it off) Nothing, nothing. Where’s the Irishman?

Booker T: How ‘da hell should I know where ‘dat fool’s at? It ain’t like Finlay runs wit’ muh’ or anythin’, man. Ain’t seen ‘im since befo’, (shaking his head) but ‘dat don’t matter – ‘dat don’t matter, ‘cause ‘dere’s only one man here who goin’ ta’ Judgment Day, and ya’ lookin’ at him, dawg!

Edge: (Rolling his eyes) Well, this was productive.

Booker T: (Scoffs) Whatever. Jus’ make sure you’re out ‘dere ta’night, man.

Edge: Yeah… (turning to leave) yeah, same goes for you, uh, man.


~ Edge and Lita angrily glare at Booker, before turning around, and arrogantly head from the room. Once the two are gone, Book quickly re-commences shadow boxing.



*Backstage*

A large red,bloody gash adorning his forehead, ‘The Animal’ Batista storms through the backstage area, slamming his fists against various locker room doors, yelling out, “FINLAY!” sending backstage workers scuttling for cover in fear…

{Commercials}


*Backstage*

Arms folded, black leather gauntlets covering his muscular forearms, ‘The Shooter’ Brent Albright appears on our screen, accompanied by his attractive blonde valet, his face conveying a sense of rage that we are not used to seeing, as he points threateningly into the camera…

Brent Albright:
(Scowling) Bob Holly, just who the hell do you think you are?

~ Brent shakes his head furiously.


Brent Albright:
Oh, I – I know who you think you are, Bob(pointing threateningly) you think you’re this big tough guy who has some kind of God-given right to go around gettin’ in younger and better stars’ faces, almost costing ‘em matches, am I right?

~ The blonde woman sighs with disgust in the background.


Brent Albright:
(Laughs) Well, if you wanna’ keep on doing things the cowards way, Bob, then by all means just come out there tonight during my match, eyeball me like some kind of a tough guy, and see if I lose. (Grits his teeth) But I’ve got a better idea. Why don’t you actually come down to the ring and try the Crowbar on for size? I’m game, Bob, only one question left… are you?

~ Boos as Brent bares his teeth.


Brent Albright:
I don’t even know who my opponent is tonight, and frankly, I don’t care. I’ve beaten everyone in my path so far, and tonight’s gonna’ be no different. (Eye narrow) You all need to learn than when you get in the ring with me, you’ve only got two options… (pounds his fist) you can tap out(smirks) … or pass out, at the hands of “The Shooter” … … Brent Albright.

~ Albright brings his arm into the air, showing off his massive guns, before holding his finger up to the lens…


Brent Albright:
(Points finger at camera like a gun) Bang”.

~ Boos flood the silence as soon as the brash rookie stops talking, and he strides off camera, along with his associate. After a few moments of nothing but crowd noise and Tazz’s excited breathing…








***
BLOOD, SUGAR, SEX, MAGIK*** ‘The Shooter’ Brent Albright makes his way down to the ring, looking much more business-like than usual, which doesn’t bode well for Juventud Guerrera warming up.

Tazz: (Chuckling) Haha, it’s that time of the ring already, baby, it’s “Shooter’”time and Juventud is caught in Brent Albright’s sights. I keep tellin’ ya’, Cole, this Albright, he’s the real deal, straight-up awesome. A machine if ever I saw one.

3 - Brent Albright vs. Juventud Guerrera

Poor Juventud’s luck doesn’t improve this week either, after being served up to a pissed-off Jamie Noble last week, he gets similar treatment tonight, as Brent Albright makes short work of him, despite constantly looking up the ramp, polishing him off with his GERMAN SUPLEX, GERMAN SUPLEX, HALF-NELSON SUPLEX trifecta, before earning the submission victory with the deadly CROWBAR!

Winner - Albright via submission @ 2:58.

The crowd boos Albright, who gets up, looking as flawlessly impressive as ever. The boos immediately turn to cheers … as HARDCORE HOLLY stands behind Albright, a scowl on his face!!! The blonde woman shouts, prompting The Shooter to turn around and HOLLY TAKES A SWING -- BUT ALBRIGHT DUCKS, GOES BEHIND, DUMPING BOB ON THE BACK OF HIS HEAD WITH THE HALF-NELSON SUPLEX, knocking him out cold!!

The crowd pours on the heat on the impressive rookie, as Albright staggers backwards a little, holding his face with a bit of shock, before he quickly leaves the ring, message sent loud and clear…







{Commercials}


*Cut to video*

Narrator:
No one gets out of here … alive…

- A guillotine rises into the air; flashing shots of Batista, Mysterio and ‘Taker…

Narrator:
How will we meet our fate? … …

- The blade falls as we see Edge spearing some poor bastard…

Narrator:
At the hands of an executioner? … …

- Lashley posing in the dark, killing someone in the ring; ‘Taker performing the throat slash, followed by the Tombstone…

Narrator:
At the mercy of a callous judge? … …

- Fading shots of Finlay, Albright, Kennedy and Kash doing their signature poses…

Narrator:
Or … at the throw of a switch? … …

- The guillotine blade becomes an electric chair, as Booker T poses in the darkness, followed by Matt Hardy, then a close up of the smiling, evil face of Kennedy, before we see him nailing the Green Bay Plunge…

Narrator:
Whatever the means … the time has come…

- Quick, flashing shots of Hardy posing, ‘Taker brooding, Batista hitting the Spinebuster, Lashley staring into the camera, and Rey nailing the 619…

“To face …”

- The guillotine comes crashing down through the screen.

“… Judgment Day.”



“WWE Judgment Day, May 21st, 8/7CT, live on pay-per-view”

*Video Ends*



*Backstage*

Receiving another BOOMING ovation from the sold-out arena, ‘The Animal’ Batista stalks around the backstage area, his forehead still bloody, his chest still heaving, but now carrying … A STEEL CHAIR in his right hand. Deacon Dave continues to yell, “FINLAY!” with every step, checking a few locker rooms, and even terrifying a few civilians, “You seen Finlay!?” sending them scurrying away. Growling like a beast, Big Dave approaches one door, puts his ear to it and listens. A scowls soon forms on his face.

Furious, Batista KICKS open the locker room door, letting out a LOUD ROAR as he enters…


‘Tista charges into the room, with the camera conveniently following him, as he races up behind the unsuspecting FINLAY, who was just chatting with a few backstage workers, but they quickly scurry, as The Animal crashes the party!

The furious Batista quickly rears back with the chair, and looks to take Finlay’s HEAD OFF
-- just as The Fighting Irishman turns around to see what is going on AND BIG DAVE WHACKS HIM RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES WITH THE STEEL CHAIR!!!

Finlay goes down in a heap, and the backstage workers immediately jump on The Animal, trying to restrain him, as he yells at the Irishman, “C’MON YOU LITTLE BITCH!”

Rolling around, groaning, Finlay touches his own skull, which now features a major
bloody gash on the scalp, prompting Fit to growl, TACKLING BATISTA BACK AGAINST THE WALL!

The Irishman gets in a few cheap shots on Batista, before turning and staggering dazedly (he has no idea where he is) from the locker room. The Animal isn’t going to let his three-time attacker get away that easily, as he TOSSES THE BACKSTAGE WORKERS ASIDE LIKE CHILDREN, nailing a couple of them with right hands, before storming on out of the locker room in pursuit of the veteran.


Soon enough, we are back outside in the hallway, where a bloodied and dazed Finlay staggers along, various officials trying to check on his well-being, though he keeps shoving them aside, “I’m fine DAMMIT!” Until the sounds of the pursuing Animal are heard, and Dave Batista comes stomping back around the corner …

…title gone…

…head bloodied for the third straight week…

…unable to get a win…

…helpless…

…fatigued… exhausted…

…pissed off…



BATISTA SPEARS FINLAY RIGHT INTO THE WALL!!!

The crowd can be heard going absolutely ape-shit in the background, as Finlay crumples against the brick wall, groaning in pain, and Big Dave ROARS, dragging the veteran back up to his feet, spinning him around, and HURLING HIM INTO THE NEARBY TRASH CANS!! At least a dozen backstage road workers, the likes of Dean Malenko, Arn Anderson, and Ricky Steamboat etc. are present now, trying to keep the monster at bay.
But they’re not enough -- it’s arguable whether or not anyone would be enough to halt The Animal in this kind of mood, on this kind of rampage, as he breathes heavily, watching as Finlay crawls desperately on his hands and knees … heading for the parking lot…



*Outside*

There is a parked limousine right by the entrance, as we emerge into the night, following the chaos, though it is not clear whether it belongs to Finlay or whether it’s just the closest thing to a getaway vehicle he can find. Scrambling over it, the Irishman leans over the hood … ONLY FOR BATISTA TO HURL HIM ONTO THE CAR, HITTING THE WINDSHIELD HARD!!! The driver gets the hell out of dodge, as Big Dave steps up onto the hood after Finlay, lifting the dazed Irishman back up to his feet, scooping him up, AND SLAMMING HIM DOWN ON TOP OF THE LIMO WITH A RIB-SHATTERIN’, FUCKIN’ SPINEBUSTER!!!!

As the officials wince and groan, they finally manage to get hold of Finlay as his limp body rolls off the vehicle, getting in between him and the psychotic Batista.

As ‘Tista struggles against the phalanx of security, the camera whirls around to show us Stephanie McMahon, hands over her face, watching on with absolute horror.

Arn Anderson tries to stop her, but the brash Ms. McMahon waves him aside, marching right up to the heavily restrained, seething Animal…


Stephanie McMahon: (Furious) Do you realise what the hell you’ve just done!?

~ Eyes bulging out of his head, Batista fixes his eyes of the hottest McMahon.

Stephanie McMahon: Any title chance you had? (Clicks) Gone. Just, like, that.

~ Batista struggles against the security.

Stephanie McMahon: If that’s what Shane wants, Dave, if that’s what he wants.

~ Is The Animal even listening? It’s debatable. He struggles furiously against the arms wrapped around his arms and torso, as Stephanie shakes her head dejectedly.

Stephanie McMahon: Don’t do this, Dave. Don’t do this… (voice drops) … to me.

~ The chaos continues, as Steph finally relents, allowing AA to usher her away from the danger, as Big Dave screams after her, “FUCK SHANE AND FUCK YOU”

Our final shot before heading into another commercial is of a beaten, bloodied Dave Finlay, in a very bad way, being led away from the scene by paramedics, while ‘The Animal’ Dave Batista continues to fight against his restraints, yelling, “CHICKEN SHIT PUNK!”


{Commercials}


Michael Cole: Ladies and gentlemen, we are back on SmackDown, and, Tazz, we’ve known Batista since the first day he came to the WWE, (the footage plays)but I’ve never seen him in this state of mind, never seen that side of The Animal.

Tazz: Hey c’mon, Cole, you had to know he was capable of it? He’s ‘THE ANIMAL’ after all, and that’s what Triple H and Ric Flair in Evolution trained him to do, destroy everyone and everything, but what he just did to Finlay… oh man.

Michael Cole: Unbelievable. Incredible. Chaotic events here on Friday Night SmackDown tonight, and I don’t know what Stephanie McMahon and Shane McMahon are going to do with Batista after that. Surely he can’t – he can’t still be competing in the main event after what we just witnessed? One thing’s for sure, Finlay certainly–


“KENNEDY!!!”


Well, he ain’t in Kansas anymore. There’s no mixed reaction this week, but THUNDEROUS boos, as the brash, cocky, egotistical Mr. Kennedy makes his way down to the ring, wearing his close-fitting, black ‘Talk Smack’ t-shirt over his blue trunks, chomping away nauseatingly on his gum.

Michael Cole: Oh God, I was hoping we wouldn’t see the egomaniac tonight.

Tazz:
Unlikely, Cole, highly unlikely. That man right there is so high on himself right now, so much in love with himself, believin’ his own hype and all that other crap, I’m surprised we’ve lasted this long without hearin’ from Mr. Kennedy, Kennedy. Remember, he took out Matt Hardy couple o’ weeks back, and at Judgment Day, they’re gonna’ get it on.

Michael Cole:
He’s delusional, that’s what Mr. Kennedy is. Sick.

~ Stepping through the ropes, Kennedy twirls extravagantly on the spot, throwing his gangly arm up into the air, catching his beautiful microphone as it (and the lights) falls…


Mr. Kennedy:
(Eyes closed) Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall with a twenty minute time limit… (smirks) just so I can give you all a little taste of what Matt Hardy can expect… (mouthing each syllable) … in just six, teen, days at Judgment Day.

~ Heat from the crowd, but Kennedy doesn’t give a damn.


Mr. Kennedy:
Introducing first… (gets in position) I weigh in tonight at a simply sublime 239 anatomically superior pounds. I hail… (booming) … from GREEN BAY, WIIISSSCONSIN-AAAAAA …

~ TREMENDOUS heat.


Mr. Kennedy:
MMIISSTTERRRRRR KENNNEEDDYYY–

***KAI EN TAI***


Michael Cole: Thank God.

The look on Mr. Kennedy’s face is nothing short of absolute disgust, as the crowd gives a small pop (mainly because someone just shut Kennedy up) for SmackDown’s #1 Announcer Funaki, who jogs down the ramp happily, wearing his generic wrestling gear, slapping hands with a few of the fans, absolutely no idea what he just did.

Rolling into the ring, ‘Naks waves to the audience, before heading over to a dumbfounded KK (who still hasn’t moved a muscle, btw), grabs his free hand, shakes it, before heading back to his corner, getting set. Ignoring Kennedy’s shock, the referee just shrugs, and calls for the bell.

4 - Mr. Kennedy vs. Funaki

As soon as the bell tolls, Funaki comes out of his corner, fists raised, shadow boxing slightly, as Kennedy remains still, still holding his microphone against his cheek, not even blinking. A small “FUNAKI” chant begins -- AND KENNEDY RACES FORWARDS, SMASHING THE MICROPHONE RIGHT THROUGH THE FACE OF THE JAPANESE SUPERSTAR, CAUSING AN INSTANT DISQUALIFICATION!!!

Winner - Funaki via DQ @ 0:04.

Michael Cole: HEY, C’MON, WHAT THE HELL!?

The crowd goes almost literally () insane, while referee Mickey Henson throws his hands into the air in horror. Kennedy, by contrast, has the look of a man completely focused, as Funaki hits the deck clutching his face, screaming in pain. The ref tries to get in between KK and the former Cruiserweight Champion lying on the deck, by Ken doesn’t want to hear it, grabbing Henson by the scruff of his neck, racing across the ring, and hurling him to the outside like a sack of crap!!
Tony Chimel wisely decides to get the hell out of there, while the camera closes in on poor Funaki, who’s been
BUSTED OPEN, by that damn microphone!! KK leans his head back, eyes closed, soaking up the reaction of the thousands in attendance … a look frighteningly similar to the one he had two weeks ago.

Grabbing his mic, Kennedy angrily begins to HAMMER away on the ‘Naki, over… and over… and over again!! The crowd continues to boo the living hell out of the undefeated superstar, as his face twists evilly!! Jumping to his feet, KK take the flat of his boot up, before he begins stamping away on Funaki like a man possessed!! Soon enough, the resident jobber’s face soon begins to resemble nothing more than flesh that has been shredded into bloody coleslaw, shocking everyone.

Grabbing Funaki by the hair, Kennedy holds him up, yelling at the oncoming security guards to “GET THE HELL BACK!” which they wisely do.

Kennedy smiles, still not looking deranged like one might think he is … just completely and utterly pissed off, his arrogant ways offended.

Retrieving his microphone, dripping with blood like an ice cream cone with syrup, Kennedy gets right in Funaki’s face…


Mr. Kennedy: (Breathing heavily) No one… no one… interrupts… (points) me.

~ Funaki can’t hear a damn thing … but is Kennedy even speaking to him?

Mr. Kennedy: No one… (licks his lips) messes… with me.

~ Kennedy cocks his head.

Mr. Kennedy: (Seething) No one does that…

~ Dropping down, KK is almost seated alongside the Japanese veteran, propping him up with his arm, holding him like a lover, baring his teeth right in his face…

Mr. Kennedy: …to Mister Ken - Na - Day.

~ As the heat continues to ooze down on the pompous platinum blonde, Kennedy pushes his hand against Funaki’s limp head, just shoving him down to the canvas.

Scrambling back up to his feet casually, KK doesn’t bat an eyelid as the EMT’s and paramedics (boy, they’ve had a busy night, eh?) swarm the ring, instead just staring, transfixed, at the blood treacle red microphone in his hand…



*Backstage*

Sat with her hands over her eyes, Stephanie McMahon switches off one of the nearby monitors, sighing with disgust at the events that just took place in the ring … until a little cough catches her attention.

???: Hey, sis, I was, uh, watching that.

~ Stephanie looks straight up – pissed, as Shane McMahon smirks at her from the sofa.


Stephanie McMahon: Oh – oh, I’m sorry, Shane, please forgive me [/sarcasm]. I’m just sick and tired of trying to keep some order around here for Dad, while you just sit on your ass getting drunk and occasionally making the odd crooked main event when you can be bothered! Have you not been watching the show? Batista’s out of control, Kennedy thinks he can do whatever he wants, so do Burchill and Regal… and you?… (Flails her hands)

Shane McMahon: (Takes a sip) That time of the month, huh?

Stephanie McMahon: (Staring) … … …What?!


~ Shane shrugs his shoulders.

Shane McMahon: Look… (hand of peace) just relax, Steph, okay? There’s nothing to worry about ‘round here as long as you know how to handle everyone and everything. The Bluebloods are giving your grief? Fine, they can have it that way if they like, ‘cause if they’re such good buddies with The Basham’s then let’s see how they do… as a team. It’s going be a ‘First Time Ever’, Eight-Man Tag Team match, and whoever scores the deciding fall wins a title shot for their team, okay?

~ Steph frowns, as if to say, “So what?”

Shane McMahon: (Getting up) The Basham’s and The Bluebloods, The Hooligans and their new best buds MNM. They all want a shot, so good old Shane O’ Mac is gonna’ give ‘em what they want. Forget about Mr. Kennedy. At Judgment Day, that bleached-blonde punk gets what’s comin’ to him(winks) and as for big, bad, Dave Batista, as far as I’m concerned, he is still in the main event tonight, and he is still in with a shot for Judgment Day. You know why? (Cocks his head) Because it sells, and that, sis, is booking 101 from yours truly… (cheesy grin) Shane O’ Mac.


~ Stephanie almost looks dumfounded, as her brother polishes off his drink, grabs his jacket and dances out of the room without a care in the world…

{Commercials}


*Ringside*

Back from the break and our ears are already exposed to some of the loudest heat of the evening, as standing on the stage atop the entrance ramp, strangely all alone for once in his life, is obnoxious agent of ‘The Real Deal’ Bobby Lashley, Paul Heyman, apparently having just made his entrance and fishing a microphone out of his pocket.

Clad in his usual grey suit and baseball cap, Heyman looks even more smug than usual, as he takes a look around the arena, soaking up the boos of the sold out arena, before bringing up the mic…

Paul Heyman: (Smiling) Jeer me all you want, but – but ladies and gentlemen, if you can find it inside yourselves… (hand on heart) PLEASE GIVE CREDIT, WHERE CREDIT, IS DUE!!

~ The crowd rains on Paul E’s parade good and proper, as the sanctimonious manager rests his free hand on his chest, directing his speech into the masses with his usual grandeur.

Paul Heyman:
(Smugly) It was ALLLL, MY, IDEA!! It was all MY idea that should he defeat “The Animal” Batista last week, one-on-one, my client would EARRRRN his WrestleMania rematch. And he did just that, ladies and gentlemen, he did just that.

~ More boos.


Paul Heyman: That plan came to fruition just seven days ago. And now, ladies and gentlemen, I would like to introduce to you the FUTURE OF THIS INDUSTRY…



“HELL WILL BE CALLIN’ YOUR NAME”



“…the man who will once again go toe-to-toe with The Undertaker at Judgment Day, my client, THE REAL DEAL, BOBBBBYYYY LASHLEEYYYY!!!”

Heat has gripped the U.S Bank Arena already, as Heyman screamed over the music, and the aforementioned monstrous frame of ‘The Real Deal’ Bobby Lashley strides out onto the stage with a menacing, albeit cold, glint in his eye. Clad in his wrestling attire, with a ‘Dominator’ t-shirt over the top, B-Lash cuts a terrifyingly intimidating figure, as he joins his agent, the beaming Heyman, who doesn’t even bother to let the music stop playing…


Paul Heyman: (Grinning) Oh, Bobby – Bobby, I think it’s time that the people realised that you, sir, as The Real Deal -- that you, sir, as the man that will face The Undertaker for an unprecedented second time at Judgment Day -- you, BOBBY - LASHLEY, are the answer to ALL of Shane McMahon’s problems. Shane McMahon earlier tonight said he was making decisions because it was “Good … Business.” Nobody – NOBODY on the face of the planet today is better for business… THAN BOBBY LASHLEY!!!

~ Lashley nods his head in agreement, as Heyman points at him.

Paul Heyman:
(Admiring Lashley) No man has the physical perfections… of Bobby Lashley. No man has the genetically superior intelligence… of Bobby Lashley. No man has the sheer, unadulterated, animalistic strength of the one, “The Real Deal” Bobby Lashley, AND … no man, that I have ever met IN, MY, LIFE, has the COLD, has the CALCULATION, has the FOCUS to achieve his ultimate goals… more than our Real Deal… BOBBY, LASHLEY…

~ Boos fall from the rafters, drawing a glance from B-Lash.

Paul Heyman:
Now, ladies and gentlemen, I want you… to set your envy aside. I want you to put aside your jealousies, and I want you to (beckons with his hand) stand up and applaud the man who will soon systematically TEAR the human SCAB that is The Undertaker from SmackDown’s rotting carcass… FOREVER, Bobby, Lashley.

~ Crowd boos instead.

Paul Heyman: And as – and as for the match in which… (turns to Lashley) this man will accomplish such an extraordinary feat, let’s just say that there are so many to choose from and such little time left before Judgment Day, so please… watch, this, space.

~ Heyman pockets the mic, and the camera slowly draws us away from the two polar opposite figures standing side by side at the head of the ramp, before they both turn and disappear through the black veil, their words hanging in the night…









*Backstage*

Steve Romero stands by, microphone in hand.

Steve Romero: Ladies and gentlemen, my guests at this time … the team of Paul London and Brian Kendrick, The Hooligans.

~ The crowd cheers as The Hooligans, Paul London and Brian Kendrick, come into screenshot, dressed as they were earlier in jeans and t-shirts, breathing hard.

Steve Romero: Gentlemen, earlier tonight you, along with MNM, made an unscheduled appearance during the WWE Tag Team Championship match between The Bluebloods and The Bashams in obvious retaliation for the events that unfolded last week. But, as announced earlier by Shane McMahon, you must now team with your great rivals MNM in an eight-man tag team match at Judgment Day. What are your thoughts?

Paul London: First thing’s first. ‘Bloods? Bashams? You beat us up, and you beat us down last week. You thought you’d gotten rid of London and Kendrick for good, but make no mistake about it, we’ve been coming after those tag team titles for a long time now, fellas, so what makes you think now’s the time we’re gonna call it quits?

~ The crowd pops in the background.

Brian Kendrick: So as for MNM? Joey, Johnny, we never beat you for the belts, something we wanted to do more than anything, and now we find ourselves on the same team headin’ in to Phoenix in just over two short weeks. Something’s gotta give.

~ London rubs his beard.

Paul London: Right now, fellas, we’re not on the same page. We probably never will be. But next week, we can try and do something about that. One more time. One last match. No titles. No third team. Just The Hooligans and MNM. Mano y mano. We can settle this once and for all, and we can both move on. (Eyeballs camera) We’ll be waiting.

~ The crowd pops as L & K slap hands, and head off camera. Tazz and Cole hype the number one contender’s 3-on-2 handicap match later tonight.

{Commercials}


A video package plays hyping the two PPV main event calibre matches scheduled for next week, with Rey Mysterio defending his United States Championship against the man he took it from at WrestleMania, Booker T, and Batista finally getting his hands on ‘The Fighting Irishman’ Finlay.

***I WALK ALONE***



Showtime. The U.S Bank Arena delivers a thunderous ovation, as the longest reigning World Champion of the modern era, the man who only lost the title a mere month and a bit ago at WrestleMania, “The Animal” Dave Batista storms out onto the stage, still looking like he just came from a bar fight -- which is almost true.

Michael Cole: After what we’ve seen from that man tonight I don’t honestly think mine or anyone else’s words would do him justice. The Animal has been ON A RAMPAGE, after he was struck for the third straight week by Finlay and that damn shillelagh, Batista well and truly took it to the Irishman, beating the hell out of the veteran backstage!

Tazz: Yeah, I mean, Finlay was scheduled to be in this match too tonight, but after that ass-kickin’ Big Dave gave ‘im -- you see that Spinebuster on the hood o’ the car? -- after all that I think we’re just gonna’ be havin’ ourselves a regular tag team match.

“BOOYAKA BOOYAKA 619”



The crowd responds with another TREMENDOUS ovation, certainly matching that of The Animal. As the United States Champion Rey Mysterio explodes out onto the stage, his title belt strapped firmly around his waist. As he heads down the ramp, Rey-Rey watches his tag team partner cautiously, evidently concerned by Batista’s unstable actions so far.

Michael Cole: What an opportunity this is for Rey Mysterio, a man who has been on the roll of his life in 2006. We didn’t think it could get any better when he captured the United States title at WrestleMania Twenty-Two, but now he has an even bigger opportunity.

Tazz: You ain’t kiddin’, Cole. It might just be me bein’ dumb, but I can’t remember if Rey has ever had a shot at the World Heavyweight Championship before in his career, and now here he is, just a fall away from gettin’ that chance.

Michael Cole: But can he rely on his partner, his friend tonight?

Tazz: I - I think so, Cole. I mean sure, Batista’s been off the wagon tonight with all this business with Finlay gettin’ to him, but this is about the World Heavyweight Championship, somethin’ that Dave values more than anythin’. His head’s in this one. Trust me.

“CAN YOU DIG IT, SUCKA’?”



Despite the initial loud pop for the catchiest intro in professional entrance music today, it soon degenerates into booming heat, as the former United States Champion and the former 5-time World Champion Booker T strides out onto the stage, along with his lovely wife Sharmell. Rocking his fetching black and white trunks, Book throws his arms in the air, setting off his fiery pyro, before swaggering on down.

Tazz: Haha, this is what I’m talkin’ about, Cole, THE BOOK MAN! Five-time, five-time, five-time, five-time, FIVE-TIME, World Champion, that’s right ain’t it? But Book’s never held that title since he’s been with the WWE, and I know that’s eatin’ away at him, ‘specially with him being such a decorated athlete an all that.

Michael Cole: I think as you were reading out that list of Booker T’s accolades, you missed out a few of his more noticeable features, namely his pompous, egocentric, selfish, arrogant, whining, self-promoting attitude toward everyone and everything.

Tazz: (Laughing) Well yeah, I was just gettin’ to that, Cole. The way I see it, all those things you just mentioned, they just add to The Book Man’s charm, they’re why he’s been so successful, and that’s why he’s my pick tonight to pick up the win here and go on to face Edge for the World title in a few weeks at Judgment Day.

“YOU THINK YOU KNOW ME”



As the smoke begins to fill the stage, the World Heavyweight Champion himself, ‘The Rated R Superstar’ Edge strides through the cloud, Lita on his arm. The two pose for a while atop the ramp, Edge spinning his girlfriend around by the arm, before making his way to where Booker waits on the apron. Wearing his black and red tights, the title belt around his waist, Edge nervously approaches.

Michael Cole: Well here comes the man at the centre of this whole, messy equation. Edge is the World Heavyweight Champion. He defeated Batista for that title back at WrestleMania, and he defeated The Undertaker to retain it just last week. Make no mistake about it, love him or hate him, Edge is the real deal.

Tazz: You said it, Cole, absolutely. Edge did what no one could do in 364-days when he beat Batista for the World Heavyweight title at WrestleMania. Triple H couldn’t do it, JBL couldn’t do it, and neither could Eddie Guerrero, or Randy Orton, or The Undertaker himself.

~ As Edge anxiously removes his jacket, he and Booker T step through the ropes, entering the ring, looking back up the ramp for…











Nothing to happen. Edge rakes his fingers through his long hair, pulling out large clumps of it in the process, while Booker gulps nervously, realising that his team no longer holds all the cards. Across the ring, a smirk forms on the face of Rey Mysterio, while The Animal just nods his head, satisfied with the damage done to the Irishman.


6 - Main Event; Tag Team Match
World Hvwt. Champ. Edge & Booker T w/Lita & Sharmell vs. U.S Champ. Rey Mysterio & Batista
*Winner Faces Edge for the World Heavyweight Championship at Judgment Day*

Once the realisation dawns on Booker T and Edge that Finlay will not be joining them for the match, their faces fall; their previous arrogance and confidence now replaced by dread at the thought of having the face their two opponents in a fair fight, as Batista and Mysterio … RACE ACROSS THE RING … CLOTHESLINING THE HEELS OVER THE TOP ROPE, as we cut to our final commercial break!!!

We rejoin the match in progress, with Mysterio and Booker exchanging right hands centre of the ring, with Rey-Rey getting the better of the exchange with a flurry of low kicks, before shooting himself off the ropes -- RIGHT INTO A LEAPING HOOK KICK to the jaw!!

This throws Mysterio right into the lion’s den, as he becomes the face teams sacrificial lamb (as if it was ever in doubt ), with the two heels, Edge and Booker, isolating the smaller United States Champion, wearing him out, while the hyped up, impatient Animal paces up and down on the apron. At around the twelve minute mark, Edge, the legal man, decides enough is enough, and UNCOILS WITH A SPEAR -- BUT REY LEAP FROGS OVER THE WORLD CHAMPION, CAUSING HIM TO COLLIDE WITH THE TURNBUCKLE!!!

Both men are down, with Mysterio extremely fatigued, and Edge stunned after that collision with the middle turnbuckle pad. Rolling onto his stomach, Rey begins to crawl, using his elbows, towards his corner, where the caged Animal waits, arm outstretched, desperate to get in. Seeing the danger, Edge quickly clears his head of cobwebs, and grabs Rey’s leg, dragging him back up to his feet, preventing the tag -- BUT MYSTERIO LEAPS UP - ENZIGUIRI TO THE SIDE OF EDGE’S SKULL … AND HE MAKES THE TAG TO BATISTA!!!

Cincinnati ERUPTS, as the man who took out Finlay earlier in the night makes his presence felt, as THE ANIMAL IS UNLEASHED, knocking Edge down with a big-time right hand, before marching straight across the ring and letting Booker T have one as well!! Big Dave, rolling, turns back around -- kick to the gut from Edge, the World Heavyweight Champion tries for the EDGECUTION DDT -- BUT BIG DAVE SPINS OUT OF IT, BRINGING EDGE SPINNING AROUND AND DOWN WITH A SWINGING SIDEWALK SLAM!!!

The former World Heavyweight Champion is well and truly setting the U.S Bank Arena on fire, as he ROARS with intensity, holding his hands in the air, as he scowls down at the man who ended his 364 days reign atop the championship mountain. After shaking the ropes, ‘Tista yells out, “BOMB!” before turning back to his prey–

BOOKER T TAKES THE ANIMAL’S HEAD OFF WITH A SUPERKICK OUT OF NOWHERE!!

The crowd boos wildly, as Booker T celebrates arrogantly, getting right in Batista’s face and bellowin’, “HOW D’YOU LIKE THAT, HUH!?” at the top of his lungs. Almost as soon as The Book Man stands back up after admonishing The Animal … REY MYSTERIO FLIES BACK INTO THE RING, hammering away on the man he defeated for the United States title at WrestleMania and will defend against next week with great fury and terrible anger!!

Such are the force of Mysterio’s blows that he manages to back Booker all the way across the ring and into the ropes. Taking Book’s arm, he goes for the Irish Whip, only for the bigger man to reverse it, before going for the back body drop -- KICK TO THE HEAD!!!

The crowd roars once more as Rey-Rey quickly turns on his heel, hits the ropes once, as Booker T staggers backwards holding his mouth, and Mysterio leaps up -- BOOK CATCHES HIM, LOOKING FOR A WHEELBARROW SUPLEX -- REY COUNTERS INTO THE BULLDOG!!!

His face slamming down into the canvas, The Book Man is punch drunk as he stumbles back up to his feet, wandering blindly around the ring, as the crowd cheers Mysterio on. Racing forwards, the United States Champion leaps up, dropkicking Booker in the back, sending him bumbling into the ropes, becoming entangled in the middle one. Up goes the “619” cry, as Rey-Rey dials it up, turns, races, hits the ropes, comes flying back … NAILING THE 619 TO BOOKER T!!!

Cincinnati is ROCKIN’ AND ROLLIN’, as Booker flaps around like a dying eel on the canvas for a few moments, before staggering back up to his feet blindly - REY GRABS THE TOP ROPE, LEAPING UP, SPRINGBOARDING OFF, LOOKING FOR THE WEST COAST POP -- BUT BOOKER CATCHES HIM IN MID-AIR, SPINEBUSTERING HIM INTO THE MAT!!!!

The crowd delivers quite the mixed reaction for the impressive counter, as both Booker T and most certainly Rey Mysterio lie down and out on the canvas, with Batista and Edge similarly off … until the crowd begins buzzing, before full on booing like crazy, as our cameras quickly switch up the ramp … to show us … that FINLAY, the old Irish bastard who had the hell beaten out of him by Batista earlier in the night, is staggering his way back to the ring … shoving numerous officials aside in the process …

Both Sharmell and Lita look dismayed by this occurrence, though it is The Animal who stirs first,
heading straight for the fallen carcass of the World Champion, Edge, looking to end this thing.

Groggily, The Rated R Superstar pushes himself up onto his feet, looking completely out of it, and turns around … RIGHT INTO A RING SHAKIN’ SPINEBUSTER FROM BIG DAVE BATISTA!!! The Animal is ROLLIN’, as he wastes no time shoving the man who took the title from him between his legs, lifting him into the air, and SLAMMING EDGE DOWN INTO THE CANVAS WITH A BONE CRUSHIN’ BATISTA BOMB!!!! He folds him over!!


1...

{Finlay slides into the ring}

2...

FINLAY BREAKS IT UP!!!

HERE WE GO AGAIN!!! Thunderous heat greets the actions of the uncompromising Irishman, as grabs hold of The Animal, yanks him up off the mat, races ahead, and HURLS DEACON DAVE SHOULDER-FIRST INTO THE STEEL RING POST!!! “Oohs” and “ahs” ring out, as Batista crumples in the corner, and Finlay quickly turns his attention to Edge, trying to pull him over to their team’s corner to make the tag.

Just as the grizzled Irishman is about to tag himself into the match though… BOOKER T grabs him, spinning him around, shouting, “The hell you doin’, man!?” Book obviously wants the tag too, and the two men argue -- REY MYSTERIO FLIES AT THEM -- FINLAY DUCKS, AND REY-REY NAILS BOOKER!!!

The crowd goes wild, as Mysterio and Booker roll to the outside, both men in a serious amount of pain, whilst the wily Irish veteran smiles to himself at his savvy evasion, clambering back up to his feet -- BATISTA CUTS HIM IN HALF WITH A DEVASTATING SPEAR!!!! Another wonderful ovation greets this manoeuvre, as The Animal springs back up to his feet, admittedly still clutching his shoulder.

Wincing with pain, Big Dave hobbles across the ring to where he just annihilated poor Fit Finlay, drops down to his knees, and hooks the far leg of The Fighting Irishman, eyes closed tight, feeling his deserved World Heavyweight Title rematch coming…


BUT THE REFEREE SAYS, “NO.” FINLAY’S NOT THE LEGAL MAN!!!

THUNDEROUS heat fills the arena, as a furious, damn-near psychotic Dave Batista stares a hole through referee Charles Robinson the likes of which you usually only see in Joe Pesci movies, as he storms up to his feet, booming, “WHAT THE HELL’RE YOU DOIN’!?” Angrily, ‘Tista GRABS ROBINSON BY THE COLLAR -- EDGE SUDDENLY GRABS BATISTA FROM BEHIND, ROLLING HIM UP WITH A SCHOOL BOY, AND ROBINSON HAS TO COUNT!!!!

1...

{EDGE PUTS HIS FEET ON THE ROPES}

2...

{EDGE HAS HOLD OF THE DAMN TIGHTS}

THREE!!!!!!!!!!!

Winners - Edge, Booker T & Finlay via pinfall @ 15:05.


An outpouring of heat greets the tolling of the bell, as Edge rolls out of the ring immediately after the fall, getting the hell out of dodge, as Batista realises what the hell just happened.

Scuttling back up the ramp, Edge waits as Lita quickly hurries over with his World Heavyweight Championship belt, and the superstar couple celebrate wildly at the foot of the ramp, the odds well and truly in their favour at Judgment Day…

???: (Clears throat)


~ The U.S Bank Arena’s attention is grabbed suddenly by the sound, with a furious Batista inside the ring, a groggy Booker T and Finlay outside the ring, and a gloating Rated R Superstar at the foot of the ramp all turning to look up the ramp … where Shane McMahon appears on the stage, microphone in hand, getting another mixed reaction.

Shane McMahon: Oh… (smirking) pardon the interruption, champ, I’ll keep it short.

~ Edge shakes his head with both annoyance and confusion.


Shane McMahon: As a man of my word, I’ll make it official. At Judgment Day it will be Batista versus Finlay versus Booker T versus Rey Mysterio, for the right to face you, Edge, later on that night for the World, Heavyweight, Championship.


~ Edge grins, as the crowd cheers a bit.


Shane McMahon: (Nodding) Yeah, yeah I figured you’d be pretty pleased with that.

~ The Rated R Superstar mouths, “Oh yeah”, looking to head off.

Shane McMahon: (Holds up his hand) Wait, wait, hold up a second there, buddy boy, that wasn’t quite what I came out here to tell you.

~ Edge narrows his eyes, concerned.

Shane McMahon: (Smirking) Due to certain, uh… contractual “concerns” from the board following your actions since WrestleMania, they’ve asked me… to appoint the official who will oversee the World Heavyweight title match at Judgment Day.

~ The crowd buzzes as Edge explodes, angrily yelling “WHAT!?” over and over again.

Shane McMahon: And y’know, Edge, I was just going to do the usual, the boring thing and appoint your run-of-the-mill referee… (pauses) but something my sister said got me thinking -- something she said got me thinking, y’see? She told me to take a more active role in this World Title situation, and that’s exactly what I’ll be doing… at Judgment Day.

~ Edge gulps and the crowd begins to stir. Shane O’ lets out a bit of a smirk.

Shane McMahon: (Grinning) So, Edge, and I guess, Batista, Booker, and Finlay as well, say “hello” to the Special Guest Referee for the World Heavyweight Championship match at Judgment Day…

~ Edge has his eyes closed, muttering “No, no” over and over, as Shane smartly turns his finger on himself…

Shane McMahon: (turns)… … MEEEEEEE!!!

~ A loud mixed reaction fills the arena, as Shane lets it sink in. Edge, on the other hand, looks ready to snap.

Michael Cole: WHAT!? How is Shane McMahon the Special Referee!? He – he has problems with almost everyone involved in the damn match!!

Tazz: Talk about a turnaround for the champ, Cole!!

Michael Cole: The World Heavyweight Champion got what he wanted tonight, he slithered his way to victory once again to stack the odds against all of his possible challengers, but thanks to Shane McMahon’s self-appointment as Guest Referee at Judgment Day, the odds just turned on The Rated R Superstar once again. See you next week, everyone!!


SmackDown goes off the air with a shot of Edge, holding his head down at the foot of the ramp in complete disbelief.


END OF SHOW


***


Current Card for Judgment Day
Date: May 21st, 2006
Location: US Airways Center; Phoenix, Arizona
Event Music: Killswitch Engage; This Fire Burns

World Heavyweight Championship Match:
‘The Rated R Superstar’ Edge defends against Winner of Fatal Four-Way Match
{Shane McMahon is the special guest referee}

#1 Contender's Fatal Four-Way Match:
Booker T w/Sharmell vs. ‘The Animal’ Batista vs. Finlay vs. U.S Chmp. Rey Mysterio
(Winner Faces World Heavyweight Champion in the Main Event)

WrestleMania Rematch; Stipulation TBA:
The Undertaker vs. ‘The Real Deal’ Bobby Lashley w/Paul Heyman

---

Grudge Match:
Mr. Kennedy vs. Matt Hardy

Friend Or Foes Challenge; Eight-Man Tag Team Match:
WWE Tag Team Champs The Bluebloods & The Basham Brothers vs. The Hooligans & MNM w/Melina
{If The Basham’s, Hooligans or MNM win, they earn themselves a shot at the WWE Tag Team Championship; If The Bluebloods win, they name their next WWE Tag Title challengers}

Cruiserweight Championship Match:
‘The Pit-bull’ Jamie Noble defends against ‘The Notorious K.I.D’ Kid Kash II


***
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