Monday Night Raw
Monday, January 23rd, 2006
Charlotte, North Carolina
~ Opening Video
**Across The Nation** booms in through the sold out arena in Charlotte, North Carolina, with a capacity crowd on their feet for the final Raw before the Royal Rumble. The entire building is shaking, as we cut to JIM ROSS and JONATHAN COACHMAN at ringside, who both share equally astonished expressions on their faces.
We are just six days away from he most star studded Royal Rumble in history, and tonight, ladies and gentlemen, Raw comes to you from the home of ‘The Nature Boy’ in Charlotte, North Carolina!
Don’t remind me, J.R. Anyway, I’m looking forward to some huge matches tonight made by our very own Chairman Of the Board Mr. McMahon and Raw General Manager Eric Bischoff!
The odds are stacked against John Cena and Shawn Michaels tonight; not only will they compete against one another for the final spot in the Rumble match, but tonight they will face The Spirit Squad and The Big Show respectively. They may not even make it to Sunday.
We can hope, J.R. Triple H is also here tonight; the man who’s going to take the WWE title away from Kurt Angle this Sunday, and that, J.R, is –
**Space Odyssey 3000** hits to a thunderous ovation from the North Carolina crowd, as their hometown hero RIC FLAIR makes his way out, clutching a mic in his hand. Naitch is wearing a neat business suit, and looks delighted to be home, as he struts down the ramp, blowing kisses to his fans and slapping hands with some others. As he enters the ring, Flair soaks up the ovation proudly.
WHOOOO! ‘The Nature Boy’ is back in Charlotte, North Carolina! WHOOOO!
Huge pop from the crowd, followed by a chorus of “WHOOOS”.
It all started right here for the career of Ric Flair … so it’s only right that it all starts here once again!
My best days may be behind me, sure, but that has never stopped ‘The Nature Boy’ from doin’ what he does – doin’ what he loves best…
And that’s the Limousine ridin' … jet flyin’ … kiss stealin' … wheelin' dealin’ … that this old son of a gun is all about!
Last week, someone was lookin’ to make a name for themselves, someone was lookin’ to get one over on ‘The Nature Boy’ … someone was lookin’ to BE THE MAN!
Crowd boos, knowing who Naitch is talking about.
Carlito, ya wanna be the man, ya have to beat the man … and you, Carlito, and you haven’t beaten the man ... you haven’t beaten ME!
You wanna cost me my Intercontinental title, you wanna play with ‘The Man’, then you have to learn to deal with the consequences. WHOOO!
Flair takes his jacket off and tosses it down.
You thought that the Naitch didn’t still style … WHOOO! … You thought that the Naitch didn’t still profile … WHOOO! … But you thought wrong! WHOOOOO!!!
Six days! Six days! The Royal WHOOOO Rumble! ‘The Nature Boy’ is gonna go back to the top of the mountain … and you’re gonna see, Carlito, why I am ‘The Man’ and –
**Cool** hits, cutting of Flair, and drawing a torrent of boos from the North Carolina crowd. Arrogantly the youthful Carlito waltzes out onto the stage, clad in his jeans and a black Hawaiian shirt. With an apple in one hand and a mic in the other, CCC sneers at Flair, as he stops at the top of the ramp.
Let’s get one thing straight; a few months ago, joo embarrassed Carlito, Ric Flair; joo embarrassed me when joo stole
my Intercontinental title!
Joo couldn’t stand dat Carlito was now da Man and that ‘The Nature Boy’ was dead and buried. Joo couldn’t stand dat the Space Mountain was over and dat it’s line was about as long as your last title reign!
Carlito laughs, as the crowd boos and Flair shakes his head.
But joo know what, Ric, I forgive joo. I forgive joo ‘cause I understand dat at your age joo don’t really know what joo are doing. So you attacked Carlito, but dat’s okay. Dat’s okay ‘cause … ‘cause Carlito doesn’t need the Intercontinental title anymore. Carlito needs something else … Carlito needs the WWE Title!
Ric, Ric, last week was just about making things right. Joo know it and Carlito knows it; joo never deserved the Intercontinental title. But everyone in this building knows dat Carlito deserves to have the WWE Championship around his waist.
Dat’s right. Everyone knows dat this Sunday, Carlito will go all the way and win the Royal Rumble; and I will Main Event Wrestlemania; and I will win the biggest title in this business. Carlito as da WWE Champion … now dat … dat’s cool.
The crowd erupts in a chorus of boos, whilst Carlito just smiles and looks around him, and Ric Flair glares at the cocky youngster.
Carlito, I made your ass tap out at Unforgiven; I beat ya fair and WHOOO square in the middle of the damn ring! Now, you have never and I mean WHOOO never beaten or even pinned ‘The Nature Boy’!
The crowd pops, whilst Carlito looks a little flustered.
You wanna call yourself ‘The Man’, ya wanna walk around like your God’s WHOOO freakin’ gift, then why don’t ya come down to the ring right now and try to beat the WHOOO ‘Nature Boy’!
Crowd pops, as Flair begins to unbutton his jacket, but Carlito looks a little hesitant.
Now, Ric, Carlito knows for a fact that joo don’t want me to come down to dat that ring and kick your ass. I humiliated joo last week, Ric, and joo know what? I think Carlito is too much of a nice guy to do it again.
Carlito shakes his head and mouths “No’ to Flair, as the crowd boos wildly.
Carlito, you’re nothin’ but a spoilt … WHOOO! … patronzin’ … WHOOO! … cowardly … WHOOO! … son of a bitch! If you don’t have the guts to take on ‘The Nature Boy’ then just say so!
The crowd pops, as Carlito looks irate and begins to edge down the ramp.
Carlito is no coward! Carlito is ‘The Man’ and I’m gonna show joo now, Ric Flair. I’m gonna show joo now and this Sunday and the Royal Rumble!!!
Carlito hurls his mic to the ground and tears off his shirt. He races down to the ring, but Flair is already through the ropes, and the two rivals begin to brawl on the outside. Flair levels CCC with chop after chop, but the youngster fights back and tackle Naitch over the steel steps, drilling the sixteen-time World Champion with blow after blow. SECURITY GUARDS rush down the ramp and leap on top of both men, dragging them apart desperately before the carnage can really begin. The crowd boos the decision, and then jeer even louder as ERIC BISCHOFF is seen marching down the ramp with a mic in hand.
Stop it right there! Flair, Carlito, if you two wanna destroy each other so bad then I couldn’t care less. But Raw is my show, so you’re only gonna destroy each other when and where Eric Bischoff says!
The crowd boos, whilst Carlito and Flair still struggle against the security guards.
But if you really want each other that bad, then that’s just fine, ‘cause tonight it looks like we have a hell of a main event on our hands, as Ric Flair, in his hometown, faces Carlito … IN A STREET FIGHT!
Enormous pop from the fans for this huge announcement, and Ric Flair looks extremely excited, whilst Carlito appears less so.
But I don’t want either one of you two laying a finger on the other until the match, so, guys (points to security)
,keep them in their locker rooms until then!
**I’m Back** hits, as a smiling Eric Bischoff makes his way back up the ramp, and Carlito and Flair scowl at one another from between the firm grasp of the WWE security team.
As we return **Sexy Boy** hits to a tremendous ovation to kick off tonight’s action, as ‘The Heartbreak Kid’ himself dances down to the ring. The reception is certainly mixed, given HBK’s actions last week, as he abandoned Cena, but the crowd still loved Shawn Michaels. He waits in the ring for his opponent; hand picked for him last week by Mr. McMahon, ahead of his Royal Rumble Qualifier with John Cena this Sunday.
**Crank It Up** booms out over the PA to some decent heat, heralding the arrival of the man who betrayed Kane last week and cost his team the World Tag Team Championships: the Big Show! The giant glumly walks down to the ring, an emotionless look on his face, as there has ever since he lost to Kane in a Rumble Qualifier.
Shawn Michaels vs. Big Show
A decent if fairly short match to begin with tonight, as Shawn Michaels once again finds himself fighting the odds against the seven-foot monster. Despite HBK’s opening onslaught, Show is able to take control, utilizing his superior size and strength to seize the initiative. In his usual way, Michaels is flung around like a rag doll, before eventually mounting a comeback!
HBK ducks a clothesline attempt from the big man and comes off the ropes with a huge flying forearm, knocking Big Show reeling, but not off his feet. Michaels nips up and sees Show still on his feet against the ropes, so races at him. Show explodes out, catching HBK by the arm and thrusting him into the corner. Show charges, but HBK ducks and rolls out of the way … causing Show to nail the referee! With the official down, HBK goes for some Sweet Chin Music on Show, but the giant swats the leg aside, and nails a Chokeslam on ‘The Showstopper’!
But with no referee, there is no count, and Big Show looks around in desperation. He goes over and pulls the referee up to his feet, trying to re-awaken him and … **Slow Chemical**
suddenly hits to a massive pop, and Big Show freezes in shock, as he looks to the stage. There is no sign of ‘The Big Red Machine’ though and Big Show, smiling, turns back around … SWEET CHIN MUSIC! An exhausted HBK falls on top of Big Show, as the barely conscious referee makes a slow count … one … two … three!!!
Winner: Shawn Michaels @ 07:36
HBK enjoys his victory jubilantly, as he has just defeated a giant. He has his hand held up high, as we cut across the entrance ramp where JOHN CENA can be seen at the top, standing with a serious expression on his face, staring at ‘The Heartbreak Kid’. The two men lock eyes, as we cut to -
The parking lot outside of the arena, where all sorts of commotion is underway. Security guards and other such figures are surrounding a car, where a group of familiar figures stand, shouting animatedly. One of the figures is ERIC ANGLE, the brother of the WWE Champion Kurt Angle; Eric appears to be extremely agitated.
Woah, woah, woah! What the hell’s going on here?!
Suddenly ERIC BISCHOFF walks into the scene, a flustered expression on his face. The security guards part quickly for him, and he stares intently at Eric Angle.
Eric Bischoff: (sarcastically)
Can I help you?
I’m supposed to be meeting my brother here, and now these guys (indicates the security)
are telling me no one has seen him all day.
Look, this isn’t my problem. You’re brother can’t tell the time: so what? But he better make sure his ass is in the arena tonight or so help me god…
My brother is never late. I know –
A familiar figure enters the frame and Eric Angle instantly goes cold and silent. The figure is clad in his wrestling gear, with a sleeveless ‘Game’ vest on over his trunks. Taking a swig from his bottle of water, TRIPLE H grins at both Eric’s.
I miss something good? (To Angle)
Where’s your brother? Oh, that’s right; he isn’t showing his face after what I did to his sorry ass last week. I should’ve known.
Seething, Eric Angle steps towards Hunter.
My brother isn’t afraid of you.
No? Then where the hell is he? Y’see, I’m here. I’m ready to compete. But your brother; he doesn’t have the balls!
Eric Angle looks hard at Triple H, as though a realisation has just dawned on him.
What have you done with my brother you son of a –
Eric Angle lunges, but ‘The Game’ easily side steps him, as security grab hold of Kurt’s brother. Hunter laughs and shrugs at Eric Bischoff, before getting right in Angle’s face.
You’re a nut; you’re nothing, just like you’re brother. Now … being the upstanding citizen I am, I should press charges for Attempted Assault. I should do that, but unlike your brother, I’ve got balls. So how about it, Eric, me and you tonight in that very ring?
Eric Angle looks flabbergasted by the proposal, but nods his head furiously, whilst Triple H grins and glances over to Bischoff.
Triple H: (to Bischoff)
Make the match.
Bischoff chuckles a little bit, before glancing back at the raging Eric Angle, as Helmsley turns his back on the situation and head towards the arena, a huge smile on his face.
When we return to Monday Night Raw, we cut to backstage where a smiling TODD GRISHAM is standing by.
Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my guest at this time … he is the former WWE Champion … JOHN CENA!
Dressed ready for action tonight, JOHN CENA enters the shot to a mixed reaction. He looks pumped up for tonight but still pats Grisham on the back playfully on the back, unsettling the interviewer.
John, last week you were told, along with the world, that the only way you would qualify for this year’s Royal Rumble was by defeating Shawn Michaels this Sunday in the final qualifying match. What are your thoughts on this?
Cena gives a wry smile and plays with his cap.
Y’know, Todd, a man in my position doesn’t have many friends. At times like this, the only person you can fall back on … is yourself. The only word you can trust … is your own.
Another very mixed reaction from the crowd, who know just what and who Cena is talking about.
When I first found out last week – when I first heard that Eric Bischoff had stacked the odds against me yet again … d’ya wanna know what I did, Todd?
Grisham nods nervously.
I smiled. That’s right, I smiled. For the first time since losing my WWE Championship … I smiled.
D’ya know why? It’s I was thinkin’ that Eric Bischoff had somethin’ better in him. I was thinkin’ that Eric Bischoff had somethin’ more. I was waitin’ for the armies, I was ready for the seven-foot giants, ‘cause let’s face it, if it means John Cena goes away for good, I don’t think there’s nothin’ Eric Bischoff wouldn’t do.
Crowd boos slightly at Bischoff, whilst Cena stares at the camera.
So what do I get? What does Eric Bischoff throw in from ‘o little ol' me? Well … Shawn Michaels to be exact.
Huge pop for ‘The Showstopper’.
That’s just what I thought. Two desperate men, their backs to the wall, one with the grey haired wonder in his face and the other with (mocking Vince McMahon voice)
“No Chance In Hell!”
Laughter and a big pop for Cena here.
Does it really get any bigger? I have myself, so I know y’all have been dyin’ to see this match: ‘The Heartbreak Kid’, ‘The Icon’, ‘The Showstopper’ … the one and only HBK going one-on-one with ‘The Doctor of Thuganomics’, I don’t care what they say … ‘The Champ’! Hell, I’m gettin’ goosebumps just now, thinkin’ about it.
Loud pop for Cena here.
Vince McMahon and Eric Bischoff have got to learn that when we throw two dogs into a cage, they usually start fightin’. And last week, the plan worked, ‘cause Shawn Michaels took the first bite!
Again a mixed reaction for this, as HBK’s heelish actions last week were clear.
‘The Heartbreak Kid’ only looks out for himself; I’m startin’ to get that. But last week, Shawn, ya crossed the line. You left me alone in that ring to get my ass kicked. The only thing you didn’t do was kick my damn head off yourself, but now I know how you think, I’ll be keeping an eye over my shoulder from now on.
This draws boos for Cena, as he shows his anger towards HBK.
Tonight, I just wanted ya to know, Shawn, that this thing ain’t done. You already beat the Ugly Sister, and now I’m up against Sleepy, Happy, Grumpy, Dopey and … Sneezy?
Laughter from the crowd and from Grisham too, at this mockery of The Spirit Squad.
There’s only room for one of us in that Rumble, Shawn, and the Wrestlemania Main Event can’t handle us both. I want it just as bad as you do, even more I’d say. I may not throw you to the wolves like last week, but I NEVER
back away from a fight! It’s time to run the Gauntlet, HBK … so if you want some … COME GET SOME!
Cena gives the camera a final, intense look, before nodding jokingly at Grisham and storming off, leaving the crowd buzzing in anticipation.
Back in the arena **Ain’t No Stopping Me** hits next, bringing out the new Intercontinental Champion SHELTON BENJAMIN to a decent sized pop from North Carolina crowd, as he hurries down to the ring, showing off his belt and looking over his sunglasses at the fans.
**Child’s Play** blasts over the PA and the always excitable EUGENE comes scurrying out onto the stage, waving wildly to the fans. He is accompanied by his ‘friends’ and fellow Freaks GOLDUST and SNITSKY. Eugene shakes Shelton’s hand, even though the All-American looks slightly perplexed.
**Pay The Price** brings out CHARLIE HAAS, still looking to make a name for himself since his return. Once in the ring, there still a bit of ill feeling still evident between Haas and Benjamin.
**Firestorm** introduces the first member of the heel team for the evening, as the arrogant GREGORY HELMS struts out onto the stage, clad in his long sleeveless coat and doorag. He eyes up Goldust and Snitsky nervously and opts to linger on the outside.
**Your Teacher** hits to a decent amount of heat and the pompous, disgraced former school teacher MATT STRIKER struts down to join Gregory Helms.
**Masterpiece** is last to play, as the man with the ‘Million Dollar Physique’, CHRIS MASTERS, slowly rises, shedding his cloak and taunting the fans, before heading down to the ring.
Six Man Tag Team Match
Shelton Benjamin, Eugene & Charlie Haas vs. Gregory Helms, Matt Striker & Chris Masters
With a handful of great workers on display, this match runs smoothly and brings with it a lot of excitement. Shelton Benjamin dominates the opening exchanges, taking Gregory Helms out with a huge dropkick that knocks him right off the top turnbuckle to the outside. However, Eugene makes a blind tag to the Intercontinental Champion, insisting on showing off, and takes on his rival Helms. Unfortunately, a thumb to the eye from Helms and a cheap shot from Striker on the apron, gives the momentum back to the heel.
Towards the end, Helms goes to whip Eugene into the ropes, but Eugene reverses it, sending Helms into the corner. Eugene charges, but Helms moves and Eugene collided the turnbuckle chest first. The former Hurricane leaps up and nails the Helms Buster, before making a cover that Haas has to break up. Striker is tagged in, and he and Masters tag in and out in the heel’s corner, wearing Eugene right down. Striker is the legal man and he sends Eugene into the ropes lazily. Eugene comes back and ducks the clothesline, going for his own, but Striker ducks that. Striker kicks Eugene in the mid section and goes for the Inverted Overdrive he calls the ‘Golden Rule’, but Eugene turns it into a back suplex, taking them both out! Both men struggle to the corner, as Eugene tags in Charlie Haas and Striker tags in Masters.
Haas catches ‘The Masterpiece’ with a German Suplex out of nowhere, bridging for the pin, but Helms breaks it up. Haas takes Masters to the corner, but Masters reverse it, sending Haas instead. Masters charges, but Haas moves, and goes for another German on Masters … but ‘The Masterpiece’ swings around and tries to apply the Masterlock! The two men struggle towards the face corner, as Masters tries to synch in the deadly submission. Benjamin makes a blind tag to Haas and rolls Masters up suddenly from behind for the … one … two … three!!!
Winners: Shelton Benjamin, Eugene & Charlie Haas @ 11:45
Matt Striker is just too late to break up the pin, and flies straight out of the ring in utter disgust, narrowly avoiding stamping straight on Shelton Benjamin.
An incredible match up right there with the Intercontinental Champion Shelton Benjamin continuing his recent incredible run on Raw. You just six of the youngest and brightest stars in the WWE right now, folks.
He might have stolen the win tonight, J.R, but I don't think that Shelton Benjamin will be as lucky this Friday on Smackdown when he is one of Raw's six entrants in the Number Thirty Battle Royal. He'll be joined by Charlie Haas and Eugene, as well as my personal favourites Matt Striker and Gregory Helms!
Shelton Benjamin celebrates jubilantly in the ring with his title belt, as Chris Masters sits on the canvas, apparently still unable to quite believe what just happened. Haas nods approvingly at Shelton but does not join in with the celebrations. Furiously, Gregory Helms kicks the ring steps and slides back into the ring, making a beeline for Eugene … but Goldust and Snitsky block his way! Helms talks some trash to the Freaks, before skulking away with his fellow heels.
When we return from the break we cut immediately backstage to Mr. McMahon’s office, where the Chairman of the WWE is sat staring at a television screen with a disgusted expression upon his face. Sitting next to him, looking rather nervous is Eric Bischoff.
Look – sir, it – it’s not the end of the world; I mean – Shawn Michaels isn’t even in the Rumble yet, and y’know, this Sunday –
McMahon turns on Bischoff angrily.
And what are you gonna do about it? Huh? I’ll tell you what you’re gonna do, Eric, you’re gonna make damn sure that Shawn Michaels doesn’t get anywhere near that Royal Rumble this Sunday. Understand?
Eric nods frantically, before Mr. McMahon gives the television a last sneer, and storms out of the room. Bischoff breathes a sigh of relief and leans back in his chair, rubbing his temples. He opens his eyes slowly though, beginning to realise that there is someone else in the room. He turns around slowly to see … THE SPIRIT SQUAD!
The Spirit Squad:
SURPRISE, MISTER BISCHOFF!
Bischoff nearly falls out of his chair with fright, as The Spirit Squad all rush to help pick him back up.
Get – get your hands off me! What the hell do you want?
The Spirit Squad all look at each other in a rather confused way, before one of them, KENNY, speaks.
You said you wanted to see us, Mister Bischoff.
What? Ah right, of course. Wait a second; I said I wanted to see your captain. Who’s the Captain?
All of The Spirit Squad glare at one another and begin to edge about uncomfortably, whilst Bischoff seethes.
Oh for – Look! Which one of you gives the damn orders? Which one of you is in charge of the pom poms?
The Spirit Squad: (All)
Once again, The Spirit Squad all look at one another uncomfortably, all eyeing the tag team title belts that Kenny and Mitch are currently wearing. Bischoff slams his hand against the table.
Enough! Forget about it! Just listen up; tonight you’re all facing John Cena. That jerk is scheduled for a Rumble qualifier on Sunday … but he isn’t gonna make it to Sunday … is he?
The Spirit Squad:
I already got you those damn tag team title, now you better earn it … got it?
The Spirit Squad:
Johnny, Kenny, Mikey, Mitch and Nicky all throw their hands into the middle, on top of the World Tag Team Championship belts.
The Spirit Squad:
One, Two, Three … SPIRIT SQUAD!!!
All members run from the room enthusiastically, slapping hands and screaming, clearly looking forward to their gauntlet match tonight, whilst Bischoff just looks on, aghast.
We shift briefly to a shot of Kurt Angle’s locker room, where his brother ERIC ANGLE is sat silently, clad in an awkward looking tracksuit, his head in his hands, as he waits for his match tonight against Triple H. He continues to glance over at the door, but there is no sign of his brother, the WWE Champion … Eric is all alone…
We head back into the arena, as **My Time Is Now** hits to a mixed but undeniably huge reaction from the North Carolina crowd, second only to that of Ric Flair. JOHN CENA makes his entrance, looking all business tonight, but still salutes his fans warmly, before heading down to the ring.
**Spirit** blasts over the PA next to some surprising heat, as the Gauntlet Match begins, and the first representative of The Spirit Squad is … NICKY!
John Cena vs. The Spirit Squad (Nicky, Mikey, Mitch, Johnny & Kenny)
In the huge third match up, John Cena takes on The Spirit Squad in a Gauntlet Match, as did HBK two weeks ago. The crowd is well behind Cena, as he ELIMINATES NICKY
with an FU almost immediately, before finding it a little harder against Mitch, who utilises a sneak attack to get the advantage. Mitch flies from the top, but Cena catches him in mid air and hits a second FU, and ELIMINATES MITCH
. Johhny is next up to try his luck, and he has a good go, almost rolling ‘The Doctor Of Thuganomics’ up from behind. Cena counters a victory roll into an STFU in the centre of the ring, thus forcing Johnny to tap out, and ELIMINATES JOHNNY
Mikey attacks Cena next, whilst Johnny, Mitch and Nicky skulk on the outside. With the referee distracted by Mitch, Johnny runs into the ring with a tag title belt, but Cena catches him with an FU! Mitch and Nicky get thrown to the outside, and Cena nails Mikey with the title belt behind the referee’s back and ELIMINATES MITCH
. Before Cena can even recover, Kenny hits him with a Steel Chair from behind, thus DISQUALIFYING KENNY
in favour of Cena!
Winner: John Cena @ 10:17
Not caring about their loss, The Spirit Squad pounce immediately on the fallen John Cena and begin to hammer away on ‘The Doctor Of Thuganomics’ until … **Sexy Boy** hits to a huge ovation and out comes Shawn Michaels. HBK charges down to the ring … BUT STOPS! Giving his Royal Rumble opponent one final look, HBK turns his back and heads back up the ramp, as The Spirit Squad all scream with laughter and continue to destroy Cena. Once at the top of the ramp, HBK stops and turns to watch, as The Spirit Squad all lift Cena up high and bring him crashing down with the HIGH SPIRITS! The boos rain down on both The Spirit Squad and an emotionless HBK, as Cena lies motionlessly in the centre of the ring … a broken man …
When we return to Monday Night Raw **Metalingus** hits to loudest heat of the night thus far, heralding the arrival of the ‘Rated R Superstar’ and Mr. Money In The Bank himself EDGE. He sprints out onto the stage, waving his briefcase around and taunting the fans, as LITA follows him obediently. Edge is only clad in his casual street attire, whilst Lita is scantily clad as usual. They strut down to the ring arrogantly, smirking at the hostile fans, before grabbing a mic and entering the ring.
The boos drown Edge out.
C’mon seriously, you can do better than that.
Y’know, I find it kind of hypocritical that you morons are gonna boo me but you suck up to criminals like ‘Mister Road Rage’ himself Ric Flair! But I’ve come to expect that from bigots like you!
Huge heat here, as Edge sneers around him.
Just last week I had to put up with that idiot Van Dam getting my face. Some people … some people; they can’t seem to get it through their heads that 2006 is my year. And –
The “Asshole” chants begin, and Edge looks around furiously.
SHUT UP! I don’t have to listen to you people! It’s this kind of attitude that I’ve had to put up with for years. That’s right: years. That’s how long it’s been that I have been waiting for my chance at the Main Event. But every time I get close, the WWE and all those people jealous of me … they pull me back!
How many title shots have I had in my career? Huh? Think about it. Just stop and think about. Then look at the people I’ve beaten.
I’ve beaten (mocking voice)
‘The Showstopper’ Shawn Michaels. I pinned his ass to the mat. I’ve beaten (mocking voice)
‘The Rabid Wolverine’ Chris Benoit. How many times did I beat Benoit? You do the match and you’ll see that it was countless times!
Crowd boos even louder now at this degradation of their heroes.
I beat that so called ‘Legend Killer’ on Smackdown; Randy Orton … so basically, Randy, basically you’re whole nickname is a lie. ‘Cause you can’t be a ‘Legend Killer’ until you’ve beaten a real legend … you can’t be a ‘Legend Killer’ until you’ve beaten … ME!
Even though Randy Orton is a heel, the crowd still boo Edge.
Oh, wait; wait, ‘cause I’m not done just yet. How about Kane, ‘The Big Red Machine’? I beat him! I pinned his seven-foot body to the mat … not once … not twice … countless times!
The crowd is booing wildly now, whilst Edge is getting manic with his speech.
I’ve even beaten the WWE Champion Kurt Angle, but still I was always overlooked. You just heard that list. No one can match it!!
Then tell me how many title shots all those losers have had. You know I’m right. That’s what made it all the sweeter when I beat five others and won this baby right here (pats the Money In The Bank briefcase)
and guaranteed my title shot.
That’s right, I guaranteed that I would be the World Heavyweight OR the WWE Champion. Even with this Money In The Bank contract, I can still only choose one. But when I win the Royal Rumble this Sunday, I can choose the other too, become the World Heavyweight AND
the WWE Champion … your
It’d be about time too. I’ll be taking one step closer to glory this Friday night on Smackdown when I win the Number Thirty Battle Royal and go into the Royal Rumble the same way I’ll be leaving it … A WINNER!
The “Edge Sucks” chants are incredibly loud now.
Say it as much as you want. Say my name as many times as you can. Keep it your mind, ‘cause it’s a name that you will never forget. You’ll remember me as a ten-time tag team champion, as a five-time Intercontinental Champion, a King Of The Ring, the first ever Money In The Bank … your 2006 Royal Rumble winner …
And last but not least, you all be forced
to call me your
WWE Undisputed Champion!!!
**Metalingus** hits once again, as Edges climbs to the top turnbuckle and holds his briefcase up high, pointing threateningly at the hostile crowd. He eventually climbs down and grabs Lita’s hand, before marching out of the ring and back up the ramp to phenomenal heat.
Upon returning from the break we get a brief recap of what went down earlier, including the making of the Main Event Street Fight between Ric Flair and Carlito, as well as Triple H challenging Eric Angle to a one-on-one match up, due to Kurt’s mysterious absence.
Things are not looking good for Eric Angle right now folks, and as of yet we have heard no word on the whereabouts of his brother, the WWE Champion Kurt Angle. I’m starting to think that Helmsley has had a hand in this.
But you’ve got no proof, J.R. You’re just jumping to conclusions as usual because you don’t like ‘The Game’. That isn’t a very good attitude to take.
**Time To Play The Game** hits over the PA to such heat that it even beats that of Edge, as the #1 Contender to the WWE Championship TRIPLE H makes his way out. Still clad in his ‘Game’ vest, Helmsley does his usual entrance, spitting water up high from the ring apron, before grabbing a mic and prowling around the ring, a menacing scowl upon his brow.
I want all of you people to take a good look at what you’re gonna see in this ring tonight.
The crowd boos, as Helmsley sneers and chews his gum.
I want you to take a good, long, hard look at what I do tonight to my opponent … ‘cause it’s just the start.
More boos from this very anti-Triple H crowd tonight.
Every ass I have beaten, every skull I have split … EVERY BODY I HAVE LEFT BLOODIED AND BATTERED AND COLD
… all of that has made me the single greatest wrestler to ever set foot in the ring!
Huge heat for this and “WHOOOS”, as the crowd remind Helmsley of another legend.
The last time I checked, at Survivor Series I left that jack-off Flair lyin’ in a pool of his own blood, so why don’t you people – why don’t you try and explain to me how he’s better than me?
The crowd pours heat on ‘The Game’, who just paces around the ring slowly.
It doesn’t matter what you people think – it doesn’t matter what you people say! The fact is … I am that damn good. You all know it … and Kurt Angle knows it. The fact that he couldn’t even get his ass here tonight to face me proves that I’m right. There is nothing anybody can do to stop me from becoming the eleven-time WWE Champion in six-days time!
Huge heat once more.
But at least one – at least one member of the Angle family isn’t completely full of s****t
. So c’mon, Eric, let’s see if anyone in your family has the balls to face me. Get your ass out here now, ‘cause I’m done waiting!
Helmsley throws the mic to the mat and kicks it out of the ring before staring eagerly up the ramp, awaiting his ‘opponent’…
Eventually, ERIC ANGLE comes walking down the ramp to no music, wearing one of his brother’s old tracksuits seemingly. He appears nervous to enter the ring, but Triple H invites him in. Slowly, Eric climbs up onto the apron and ducks under the second rope … AND TRIPLE H HAMMERS AWAY ON HIM INSTANTLY!
Triple H vs. Eric Angle
As one would expect, this is the very definition of a Squash match, as Eric Angle has no in-ring experience whatsoever. Triple H does not even remove is vest, but instead hammers down on Eric with boots and right hands for a while, before lifting the helpless amateur up. Helmsley laughs in Eric’s faces before whipping him hard into the turnbuckle, causing Eric to slam to the mat, gasping for air. There is blood coming from Eric’s mouth, as Triple H lifts him up again and sends him crashing across into the opposite turnbuckle, with the same effect. Hunter glances up the ramp with a wry smile, before pulling Eric up for a final time and nailing the PEDIGREE! Triple stares at the fallen, unconscious brother of the WWE Champion, before finally dropping on top for a lazy cover … one … two … three!!!
Winner: Triple H @ 01:32
Triple H forces the referee to raises his hand once again in victory, as the crowd pours the boos upon the #1 Contender. Helmsley stares up the ramp at the entrance … but no one emerges. Triple H lifts Eric Angle back up AND DROPS HIM WITH A SECOND PEDIGREE!
Grinning viciously, Hunter finally exits the ring and begins to make his way back up the ramp – but he stops. Triple H glances over his shoulder at Eric and goes back to the ring. Lifting up the ring apron, he reaches underneath and pulls out THE SLEDGEHAMMER! The crowd give a mixed reaction, as Helmsley stares at the weapon, transfixed, before rolling back into the ring. Security and officials have charged out, but Triple H gestures threateningly with the weapon, keeping them on the outside.
He pulls the bloody and helpless Eric Angle up to his knees and stares hard into his eyes. We see Helmsley stare straight up at the ramp and mouth, “This is for you, Kurt”. TRIPLE SMASHES THE SLEDGEHAMMER INTO ERIC ANGLE’S FACE!!! The crowd erupts into boos, as Hunter drops the weapon and laughs, as security flood the ring. Brushing past all of the officials, Triple H stalks back up the ramp with a menacing expression on his face, gesturing that the title will be coming around his waist this Sunday. EMT’s rush down with a stretcher for the motionless Eric Angle. But where was Kurt?
Returning from the final commercial interlude, the footage is replayed, showing Triple H’s destruction of Eric Angle, including the sickening sledgehammer shot to the skull.
Ladies and gentlemen, I’m gonna have to apologise for what we all just saw. That sick son of - that sorry excuse for a human being Hunter Hurst Helmsley just beat poor Eric Angle within an inch of his life. The man’s not even a wrestler and Triple H showed no remorse. None.
When you try to play the game, J.R, odds are you are always going to lose. I would blame Triple H too much either; ask yourself this, where was the WWE Champion? Where was Kurt Angle? Why didn’t he help his brother?
Would you listen to yourself? Of course I’m gonna blame Triple H. That attack was completely unnecessary. As for the whereabouts of Kurt Angle, well, I think we can safely say now that Triple H has had something to do with the disappearance of the WWE Champion.
That can’t be proved, J.R. That’s slander. Anyway, enough about that, ‘cause right now I’m looking forward to seeing ‘The Nature Boy’ get his ass handed to him.
**Space Odyssey 3000** hits for the second time this evening and the roof is nearly blown off by the hometown reception for Naitch. Ric Flair struts out in his shiny, extravagant gown, looking all business, as one would expect. He still finds time to salute his fans, as he parades in the ring, but finally removes his gown and tosses it aside, before staring up the ramp.
**Cool** hits to much larger heat this time, with the North Carolina crowd fully against the cocky Carlito following his earlier comments. CCC walks onto the stage down the ramp in his ‘Apple Spitter’ t-shirt and trunks looking pumped … but Flair wastes no time, as he meets the Caribou half way and the fight begins!
Ric Flair vs. Carlito
One hell of a brutal match up to close Raw with tonight, as the hatred between these two men is all too evident throughout this contest. Flair dominates for the majority to the delight of the fans, as he lights up Carlito’s chest with chop after chop, knocking him up and down the ramp. For the opening, the Street Fight rules come in as there is no count out, as Flair throws Carlito around on the ramp, sending him into the barrier over and over again.
Flair finally decides to take Carlito elsewhere and leads him down the ramp, around the ring and over to the announcer’s table. After bouncing CCC off the wooden surface, Naitch begins to strip the table of the monitors and the covering, looking as though he is planning to put ‘Lito through it. CCC gets a thumb to the eye of Flair and comes back with some stiff left hand shots. Carlito tries to whip Flair into the table, but Naitch reverses it and CCC goes crashing over it, sprawling into J.R and The Coach. With Carlito down and helpless, Flair begins to do some stylin’ and profilin’ on the outside. ‘The Nature Boy’ does ‘The Strut’ before letting out and almighty “WOOOO” to the delight of the crowd. Full of confidence, Naitch reaches down behind the announce table to grab Carlito … STEEL CHAIR OFF THE SKULL!!!
The sickening shot is greeted with “OOOOOS”, as Flair is knocked clean of his feet. An exhausted CCC throws the chair down and stalks ‘The Nature Boy’ with a sick smile on his face. Naitch rolls over and we can see that he is now a bloody mess, with his face busted open badly. Carlito rolls Naitch back into the ring and scores and near fall. CCC, frustrated, brings one-half of the steel steps in from the outside and props them up in the corner. Carlito lifts the bloody ‘Nature Boy’ up and goes to whip him into the steps … but Flair reverses it and sends CCC crashing spine first into the steel!
As Carlito rebounds out, Flair manages to bounce off the ropes and connect with a chop block, taking the youngster down. Naitch gives a final “WHOOOO” before setting up Carlito for the Figure-Four. He twists around CCC’s legs and – SPEAR FROM EDGE!!!
‘The Rated R Superstar’ throws Carlito on top of Naitch, and the referee makes the count … one … two … three!!!
Winner: Carlito @ 14:54
Edge picks Carlito up and suddenly hurls the youngster over the top rope. Mr. Money In The Bank laughs, shouting something about the Royal Rumble, before lifting Naitch up and tossing him to the outside too. Edge is strutting around the ring proclaiming his greatness as … SHELTON BENJAMIN slides into the ring and the two of them start going at it. The two men exchange blows, before … GREGORY HELMS joins the fray and takes out Benjamin from behind. He and Edge begin to double team the Intercontinental Champion as …
EUGENE AND THE FREAKS (Goldust and Snitsky) come rushing down to lend a hand. The numbers are pretty unequal now, as The Freaks, and Benjamin take on Edge and Helms, until … MATT STRIKER AND CHRIS MASTERS both join the fray. They are soon followed by CHARLIE HAAS and an all-out brawl has erupted in the centre of the Raw ring.
As all of this is going on, Edge quietly drops to the mat and rolls out of the ring, leaving the other superstars hammering away trying to gain the advantage before the Royal Rumble match this Sunday. Joined by LITA, ‘The Rated R Superstar’ smiles happily, as he walks back up the ramp keeping an eye on the others destroying one another. Everything is going to plan…
Current Card for the Royal Rumble
Date: January 29th 2006
Location: American Airlines Arena; Miami, Florida
Theme: "Stricken" by Disturbed
Royal Rumble Match;
Winner has automatic shot at EITHER brand's Champion at WrestleMania XXII:
Entrants in Alphabetical order;
Bobby Lashley, Booker T, Brian Kendrick, Carlito, Charlie Haas, Chris Benoit, Chris Masters, Chavo Guerrero, Edge, Eugene, Finlay, Gregory Helms, John `Bradshaw' Layfield, Joey Mercury, Johnny Nitro, Kane, Ken Kennedy, Kid Kash, Lance Cade, Matt Hardy, Matt Striker, Paul London, Rey Mysterio, Ric Flair, Rob Conway, Rob Van Dam, Shelton Benjamin, Super Crazy, (One Raw Spot Remaining), (One SmackDown! Spot Remaining)
WWE Championship Match:
Kurt Angle © vs. Triple H
World Heavyweight Championship Match:
Batista © vs. Randy Orton vs. The Undertaker
Royal Rumble Qualifier:
John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels