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Re: The World Wrestling Entertainment

March 13th, 2006 | Freeman Coliseum; San Antonio, Texas

We begin our show, much like last week, with a video package. Our attention this week, however, is not on Shawn Michaels, as instead we see The Cutting Edge, which closed last week’s show. With clips of Edge running from Angle and Cena in the past interjected throughout, we hear Edge talk about how he is sick of Angle and Cena, before the champ declares that after what happened at Saturday Night’s Main Event (cue Edge’s interference in the Angle/Cena match), he’ll never have to face them again. That, as we find out, isn’t the case though, as both John Cena and Kurt Angle make their way out to the ring, following by Monday Night RAW General Manager Eric Bischoff, who informs Edge and the crowd of the main event for WrestleMania 22, where, in a Triple Threat Match, Edge will defend his WWE Title … against KURT ANGLE AND JOHN CENA! The crowd erupts, only to cheer even more when Edge is hit with an Angle Slam, followed by an F-U from Cena. With the image of the two fan favourites locking eyes, we fade away to darkness.



Or at least we did for a moment. That’s right – we are now LIVE in the Freeman Coliseum, music blaring out through the arena, only to be outdone by the boos that get even louder when the WWE Champion, Edge steps through the smoke and out into the arena. Edge is joined by his lovely girlfriend Lita as usual, but in odd fashion, the two don’t get snuggly on the ramp of the ramp. Instead Edge motions to the back, waving for someone to come forth, although nothing happens, at least for now.

Joey Styles: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome here to Monday Night RAW, coming live to you from the Freeman Coliseum. We are just TWENTY days from WrestleMania 22, where that man, the WWE Champion Edge will defend his title against John Cena and Kurt Angle in a Triple Threat Match!

Jonathan Coachman: And it’s an absolute outrage that that match is goin’ ahead. I dunno what’s gotten into our esteemed General Manager Mr. Eric Bischoff there, but forcing Edge to defend his title against those two lunatics? That’s just not safe. I don’t even know if they’ll let the champ make it to WrestleMania!

Jerry Lawler: We can only hope, ‘Coach’. After running away for months now from both men, the WWE Champion is about to get what’s coming to him at WrestleMania.

Edge continues to motion to the back, looking somewhat frantic, although he soon looks a hell of a lot calmer … when A LITANY OF SECURITY GUARDS STEP OUT FROM THE BACK! The security surrounds the champ and his galpal, drawing a smirk out of him as he now confidently makes his way down the ramp.

Jonathan Coachman: Haha, this is brilliant! What’d ya say before, ‘King’? That Edge was running? Well he ain’t runnin’ anywhere tonight, babyboy!

Joey Styles: Of course he’s not running; he’s hiding behind more security guards than the queen herself!

Jonathan Coachman: Hey, the champ needs to be protected, Joe. You can’t just have any Tom, Dick, Harry, Kurt or Cena steppin’ foot in the ring with him.

The champ marches on down the ramp and up into the ring happily, knowing he’s safe as his security guards surround ringside below him, allowing him to grab a microphone and smile away in the ring. Despite being in a good mood, Edge still has to wait for the crowd to die down before speaking.

Edge: Y’know, after the past few months I have no right to be out here smiling. I have no right … I have no right to be happy. I should be sad, heck, I should be angry, but for some reason, I just can’t help it. I mean, let’s think about my past few months.

~ The crowd seems less than enthusiastic about this, but Edge clearly doesn’t give a damn.

Edge: First … first came me cashing in my Money in the Bank briefcase to become your new WWE Champion. Now this … this was something that was supposed to make me happy. This was something that SHOULD have made me smile. I shocked THE WORLD when I came out, and I cashed in and became the WWE Champion. No one saw it coming. It was the shock of the year … no … no, it was the shock of the DECADE.

~ The crowd gives some small boos for Edge.

Edge: You, you people, you had NEVER seen me as someone who could compete at the top level. You had always thought of me as someone who was good, but not quite good enough. Someone who could get close, but never quite get close enough to becoming the WWE Champion. But on that fateful night at New Year’s Revolution, I proved all you of wrong.

~ Heat from the crowd for Edge, who continues on.

Edge: This was something that I had wanted my whole life. I had ALWAYS wanted to become WWE Champion. Since I was just a kid, sittin’ up there in the stands, watchin’ the greats like Hulk Hogan, all I wanted, all I dreamt of, all I thought of was one day becoming the WWE Champion.

~ A slight pause from the champion, who paces back and forth.

Edge: This … this wasn’t just my hopes or my dreams. No. This … this right here.

~ Edge pauses and holds the WWE Title up aloft.

Edge: This was my EVERYTHING!

~ The crowd boos the intense Edge.

Edge: This was all I ever wanted and MORE! This, this was my entire life’s work. This was the result of me putting in hours, HOURS, of painstaking hard work, OF BREAKING MY NECK! This was all of that! And when I won this, at first, it was all worth it. My career, MY LIFE, I was all worth it, because I was a success.

~ Edge pauses slightly to more boos from the crowd.

Edge: I wasn’t like some of those guys in the back, who, who say that they want to be champion, but then do nothing about it. I wasn’t like those guys in the back who come out here every week, happy to just pick up a paycheque before they move onto the next town. No, I … I was a winner!

~ More heat from the crowd.

Edge: But looking back at that moment, thinking back to what happened when I won the WWE Title, do you think people think about me shocking the world? Do you think people think about how I achieved my life’s work? Do you think people CARE about the struggle, about the heartache that I went through? No. Thinking back, people don’t think about that. They think about what Joey Styles said after I won the WWE Title.

~ Edge turns his attention over to Joey Styles, who seems genuinely surprised.

Edge: Say there, Joey. Do ya … do ya happen to remember what it was you said that night?

~ Styles shakes his head and manages to stammer out a “N … no”.

Edge: No? Y’know what? That’s okay, because I remember. Oh yeah, I remember it like it was just last night. Right after I won the WWE Championship, right after my crowning achievement, Joey Styles screaming at the top of his lungs “OH MY GOD! Edge has just STOLEN the WWE Title from John Cena!”

~ Mixed reaction from the crowd as Styles continues to stutter away on commentary.

Edge: That’s right – stolen. The attention … the attention wasn’t on me. It wasn’t on how I had defeated John Cena, this company’s biggest star, to become the NEW WWE Champion. It wasn’t on how I had finally reached the top of the summit after years of hard work. Oh no. The attention … was on … John … Cena.

~ Big mixed reaction from the crowd.

Edge: At the time I looked past it. I thought it was nothing. I mean, what did it matter? I was WWE Champion, right? Wrong.

~ Another mixed reaction, but this time on a much smaller scale.

Edge: My whole career has led up to this, to being the WWE Champion, so for the past two months I should have been living it up. I should have been enjoying myself, but do you think I have? Do you think I’ve got to enjoy myself?

~ The crowd boos as Edge turns his attention to Lita.

Edge: Lita, babe, has there been one moment, one – single – moment where we’ve got to relax and enjoy ourselves? Has there?

Lita: No babe … not one.

Edge: That’s right. That is exactly right! For the past two months, I haven’t been living it up. No, I haven’t gotten to enjoy myself, and do you know why? Do you people … do you know why?

~ The crowd has a guess, shouting out the names “Kurt Angle” and “John Cena”.

Edge: It’s because of Kurt Angle … and John … Cena!

~ Despite being right, the crowd still boos.

Edge: Angle and Cena … they’ve made my life … they’ve made it a LIVING HELL!

~ Mixed reaction from the crowd.

Edge: From the very first night I held this title, FROM THE VERY FIRST, I have had to deal with Angle and Cena night in, night out, demanding shots at me! NO ONE demands anything from ME!

~ Big heat from the crowd.

Edge: It’s not enough that I already beat John Cena either. He had to come crying for a rematch, and he got it at the Royal Rumble. And do you know what happened then? I beat him!

~ More heat from the crowd.

Edge: I beat him one two three in the middle of this very ring to retain my WWE Title, and yet he STILL follows me, he STILL annoys me, DEMANDING a WWE Title match from me. But he’s not the only one. Oh no, Kurt Angle … Kurt Angle also took up some kind of vendetta against me, because unlike Kurt, I could actually BEAT Cena.

~ The crowd continues to boo Edge, but the champion just continues on.

Edge: Oh yeah, that’s right. Kurt Angle … Kurt was jealous.

~ BIG heat.

Edge: He was jealous, because unlike him, I could BEAT Cena. Unlike him, I was good enough to become WWE Champion.

~ The crowd picks up the heat even more.

Edge: You people can boo all you want, but the proof is sitting right here on my shoulder. I beat John Cena with the title on the line not once, but TWICE. How many times has Kurt Angle been able to do that? Oh yeah, that’s right … NONE!

~ Continued heat from the crowd.

Edge: But despite that, despite the fact that Kurt Angle had done NOTHING to earn himself a WWE Title match, he seemed to think he had some God-given right to chase me for my WWE Title. So he got the chance to earn himself a title match. He got the chance to prove that he DESERVES to face me in the Royal Rumble Match, but what did Kurt do? He lost.

~ Boos from the crowd.

Edge: That’s right. At the Royal Rumble both Kurt Angle AND John Cena lost. But did that matter? Oh no, of course not. Why? Because they’re Kurt Angle and John Cena! They can have a title shot whenever they damn well feel like it, and that’s exactly what Eric Bischoff gave ‘em a chance at when he made their match for Saturday Night’s Main Event. Cena and Angle should have BOTH been at the back of the line, but instead they got another chance to get a shot at my title. So what did I do? I took matters … into my own hands. I made sure that NEITHER of Kurt Angle, nor John Cena earned a shot at my WWE Title.

~ Big heat from the crowd as Edge gives a wry smile.

Edge: But yet again, that didn’t matter because Eric Bischoff felt like throwing his weight around and making a Triple Threat Match for WrestleMania, giving BOTH Kurt Angle AND John Cena a shot at my WWE Title without EARNING it. And at first, yeah, I was mad. I mean, why wouldn’t I be? Those two did NOTHING to get a shot at me.

~ Edge pauses, allowing the boos to continue.

Edge: But then I thought about it and I realised something. I realised that this match at WrestleMania … it’s a blessing in disguise. Because while Kurt Angle and John Cena will both be out to get me, just like they’ve been since day one. While the odds appear to be stacked against me – here’s the beautiful part – they’re not. If anything, the odds? They’re in my favour.

~ Slight boos for the arrogance of Edge.

Edge: Because y’see, I may be in there at WrestleMania with Kurt Angle and John Cena. I may be in there with both the greatest technical wrestler this company has ever seen, and the greatest brawler on the face of the planet, but do you think that matters in a Triple Threat Match? No. No it doesn’t matter. What matters is what’s up here …

~ Edge points up to his head.

Edge: And while Angle and Cena may be great wrestlers and brawlers, what they’re in there with at WrestleMania isn’t the greatest technical wrestler of all-time. They’re not in there with the greatest brawler. No, they’re in there with me – the smartest wrestler this company has ever seen.

~ Heat from the crowd.

Edge: What does that mean? It’s simple. At WrestleMania I am going to once again shock the world and accomplish my boyhood dream, walking out STILL your W – W – E Champion!

~ The crowd boos away.

Edge: And after that? After I’ve beaten both Cena AND Angle at the same time, they will NEVER have the right to challenge me for the WWE Title again.

~ More boos as Edge smiles again.

Edge: Now this brings me … this brings me to here and tonight, and just why I have all of these security guards surrounding the ring. Now, I don’t expect you people to quite get it at first, but trust me, it’s simple.

~ Cheap heat.

Edge: I want to be able to walk into WrestleMania at full health, because let’s face it – the only way Cena and Angle are gonna beat me is if they jump me beforehand like they’ve tried in the past.

~ Big boos for that one.

Edge: So until WrestleMania, I am declaring myself unable to compete, whether it be against John Cena, Kurt Angle or anyone in that locker-room.

~ More heat from the crowd.

Edge: And if any of you try and jump me to get a cheap shot in? I’ll have my security take care of … personally.

~ Edge laughs to himself, drawing heat.

Edge: So unless either Cena or Angle want to come out here and concede defeat right now, I see no reason to stay out here. Security? Let’s go.

~ Edge looks to head towards the ropes, until …


The crowd EXPLODES with a huge reaction of mostly cheers as the former WWE Champion, John Cena marches out onto the stage, already carrying a microphone. After acknowledging the fans, Cena quickly gets on with business.

John Cena: Whoa, whoa, whoa, WHOA! Hold the freakin’ phone!

~ Pop from the crowd as Cena smiles.

John Cena: First of all, I wanna thank you, Edge.

~ Edge looks somewhat confused down in the ring.

John Cena: Yeah, that’s right. I wanna thank you, because earlier you said that I was the greatest brawler on the planet, and … well … that’s just about the nicest thing anyone’s ever said about me. So from the bottom of my heart, Edge, really, I thank you.

~ The crowd cheers.

John Cena: Now I’m sorry to say this, Edge, but even though I’m thankful, I’m not out here to take you up on your offer of conceding defeat. You may have heard this before, but hey, I’ll just remind you. That ain’t my style.

~ Another pop from the crowd.

John Cena: No, because y’see, my style’s more … well, I’ll put it this way … if ya want some … come get some.

~ Big pop from the crowd.

John Cena: And the way you talked about how your security would take care of me personally? It made me think they wanted some themselves. And since I’m a fighter and I’ve never seen a challenge that I wanna turn down, how ‘bout I take your boys up on their offer, right here, right now?

~ Big pop from the crowd.

Edge: Are you stupid, Cena? Do you really think you can take on all of ‘em by yourself?

John Cena: Hold on, hold on, hold on. I wasn’t finished. To answer your question, no, I don’t think I can take ‘em all by myself. But y’see, that’s why I’m lucky that I happen to know that there’s another guy back there in that locker-room that wants to get to you just as bad as I do.

~ Big pop from the crowd, anticipating Angle.

John Cena: You may have heard of him …


The crowd goes ABSOLUTELY INSANE, as from the back storms Kurt Angle! Angle joins Cena on the stage, standing side by side with him, nodding at him … BEFORE CHARGING DOWN THE RAMP … AND IT’S ON! THE TWO MEN CLASH WITH THE SECURITY GUARDS, THROWING BODIES EVERYWHERE!

From the inside of the ring Edge looks on as Cena and Angle send the security flying everywhere, showing their skills as they plough through all of them in a matter of moments. Edge is left to look shocked in the ring, with Angle and Cena now setting their sights on him, when suddenly …

???: Gentlemen! GENTLEMEN! Up here!

~ The whole arena turns to the titantron … to see the Monday Night RAW General Manager, Eric Bischoff. The crowd descends down into boos, obviously not happy to see Bischoff, nor are they happy to see the end of the brawl.

Eric Bischoff: That’s right, I’m staying back here tonight. Last time I came out to try to separate you three, all it landed me was on my ass, and I’m NOT taking that risk again.

~ A small cheer from the crowd for the thought of Bischoff getting hit.

Eric Bischoff: Now, as much as I hate to agree with him, Edge is right. Tonight, NEITHER of you two will be getting your hands on him …

~ Heat from the crowd.

Eric Bischoff: Because as far as I’m concerned, the two of you have other unfinished business to attend to. I’m sure I’m not the only one who remembers how your match at Saturday Night’s Main Event ended, am I?

~ Cena and Angle glance at each other, before locking eyes.

Eric Bischoff: Good, because tonight, the two of you will get the chance to finish what you started then … in a TAG TEAM MATCH!

~ Mixed reaction from the crowd, who are disappointed the two aren’t facing in singles action.

Eric Bischoff: It’ll be John Cena and Rob Van Dam …

~ Big pop from the crowd.

Eric Bischoff: Facing Kurt Angle … and ‘The Heartbreak Kid’, Shawn Michaels!

~ HUGE mixed reaction from the crowd as Angle and Cena continue to look at one another. Edge, meanwhile, smiles away in the ring.

Eric Bischoff: Oh, and don’t think I forgot about you, Edge, because you too, will be in action tonight.

~ “WHAT?” Edge is absolutely outraged.

Eric Bischoff: That’s right, you’ll be going one on one … … … with Rob Van Dam.

~ What the fuck? The crowd reacts stunned, with RVD being announced as in not one, but TWO matches.

Eric Bischoff: And make sure that by then, you’ve gotten your little unapproved security force out of my building, okay?

~ Mixed reaction from the crowd, although there’s nothing mixed about Edge’s reaction; he’s still raging it.

Eric Bischoff: Oh, and gentlemen … good luck.

~ And with that, Eric Bischoff disappears from the screen, leaving us to cut to our announce team.

Joey Styles: Oh my God! What an announcement from Eric Bischoff. Not only do we have two HUGE matches, where we’ll hopefully see Kurt Angle and John Cena settle their score, but also, if I heard right, tonight Rob Van Dam will be … in double action?

Jerry Lawler: Yeah, that one caught me off guard too, Joey. I mean did Eric Bischoff forget he already had RVD in a match?

Joey Styles: I don’t think he forgot, ‘King’. I think this is another one of Eric Bischoff’s schemes to try to make sure RVD doesn’t make it to WrestleMania 22 to face The Undertaker.

Jonathan Coachman: I’ll tell you what it is, ‘King’ … it’s brilliant! Mr. Bischoff has given us not one, but TWO main event worthy matches, and why? Because he himself is brilliant. It ain’t got nothin’ to do with that ECW wannabe, RVD.

Joey Styles: Oh come on, ‘Coach’. You know as well as I do that Eric Bischoff has a vendetta against RVD, and he’s looking to take him out before WrestleMania.

Jonathan Coachman: I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about, Joe.

Joey Styles: You can deny it all you want, but the fact remains that …


WHAT? The sudden interruption comes as the arena dims and the music hits, causing the crowd to go into an absolute uproar … as none other than Triple H himself steps out onto the stage in typical fashion, breathing heavily through the darkness, his somewhat broken sledgehammer from last week in hand!

Joey Styles: Ladies and gentlemen, this … this is a surprise to say the least. We have to go to an ad break, but when we return, we will see why it is that Triple H is coming out here. Don’t go anywhere!

With Triple H beginning to advance down to the ring in his casual gear, we head off to a commercial break.

*Commercial Break*

We return from the break to see Triple H now standing in the ring, broken sledgehammer in one hand and microphone in the other, with fans from all around the arena bowing down to him.

Triple H: Y’know it’s kinda funny … I think … I think I just heard Eric Bischoff announce that later tonight Shawn Michaels would be teaming with Kurt Angle to take on John Cena and Rob Van Dam.

~ Big cheer from the crowd.

Triple H: Did I … did I hear that right?

~ The crowd again cheers.

Triple H: You people seem to think I did, but y’see, here’s the thing. I don’t think I can have, because Eric Bischoff knows that if anyone is going to get their hands on Shawn Michaels tonight … it’s going to be me!

~ HUGE cheer from the crowd.

Triple H: Bischoff, I get that you have your little problem with Van Dam. I get that. Personally, I’m not a huge fan of the guy either.

~ Surprised little reaction from the non-smarky portion of the crowd.

Triple H: Puttin’ him on double duty? That’d be fine with me normally, but not tonight.

~ The crowd cheers for the sheer intensity of Triple H.

Triple H: Not after what Shawn Michaels did to me nine days ago at Saturday Night’s Main Event.

~ Again, another pop from the crowd.

Triple H: So Bischoff, here’s what ya gonna do. You’re going to come down to this ring, and you’re going to apologise to me for not putting me in the match in the first place …

~ A big “OH!” from the crowd, who are LOVING the intensity of Triple H.

Triple H: And then you’re gonna put me in there so I can finish what I started …

~ Triple H holds the broken sledgehammer up and stares into it intently.

Triple H: … Last week.

~ The crowd erupts for Triple H as he now paces around the ring, not looking the least bit patient here tonight.

Triple H: Come on, Bischoff. Get out here, or I’ll just march on back there and go after both you AND Shawn Michaels.

~ Another big pop as Triple H continues to wait … before the Monday Night RAW General Manager, Eric Bischoff appears on the titantron, just like earlier.

Eric Bischoff: Hey, Triple H! Up here!

~ Hunter looks to the tron and scowls, far from happy to see Bischoff not having even bothered to come down to the ring.

Triple H: Y’know, it’s funny, Bischoff. I could’ve sworn I told you to get out to this ring and do this like a man.

~ The crowd responds with a gasp, before going nuts with a big cheer.

Eric Bischoff: Y’know, that is funny, Hunter. It really is. But y’know what else is funny? Last time I checked, this was MY show, and not yours. And do you know what that means? That means I call the shots, not you.

~ The crowd boos heavily, not liking the attitude of Bischoff, who is standing up for himself.

Eric Bischoff: Now as far as the second part of your little request goes to be included in the tag team match … how can I put this? Oh, I know … NO!

~ Big heat from Bischoff, who chuckles silently to himself.

Triple H: You’re testing me, Bischoff.

Eric Bischoff: I don’t give a damn. You’re not competing tonight, and do you know why? Because you’re not allowed to compete. You’re not physically cleared to compete after what happened to you at Saturday Night’s Main Event.

~ Heat from the crowd, although Bischoff doesn’t give a damn.

Eric Bischoff: So until you get yourself medically cleared, you’re not stepping in the ring with Shawn Michaels, nor with anyone else for that matter.

~ More heat from the crowd.

Triple H: So let me get this straight … you’re not letting me wrestle Shawn Michaels … because my safety would be in danger? Bischoff, let me make myself perfectly clear. If anyone is going to be in danger, it’s going to be Shawn Michaels.

~ Big pop from the crowd.

Triple H: And if you thought I was gonna take no for an answer just like that? Eric, you know me better than that. You saw what Shawn Michaels did to me at Saturday Night’s Main Event. Heck, it’s the reason you won’t let me compete, but if Shawn Michaels steps in the ring, I’ll make sure it’ll be the reason he’ll never compete again.

~ Another HUGE pop from the crowd, who continue to love what Triple H is saying.

Triple H: I had no reason to help Shawn Michaels when he was having his problems with the McMahons. I had no reason to get involved. I could have just kept going on my way, focusing on the WWE Title, but instead I went out of my way to help him. Out of the kindness of my heart – and that’s not a thing you hear from me too often – I went out of my way to help him. And what did Shawn Michaels do to me?

~ A dark look comes over Triple H’s face, the anger really beginning to come to the surface.

Triple H: He turned his back on me.

~ Heat from the crowd as Triple H pauses.

Triple H: He looked my in the eye and he SPAT … IN – MY – FACE!

~ More heat from the crowd.

Triple H: He took a sledgehammer, and he … he … he …

~ Triple H stops … THEN SUDDENLY GOES NUTS, SLAMMING THE SLEDGEHAMMER DOWN INTO THE MAT! The crowd explodes with a gasp, almost in fear of ‘The Game’ as he slams the sledgehammer into the mat again, and again, and again, and again, AND AGAIN, AND AGAIN!

With Eric Bischoff looking on in shock on the tron, ‘The Cerebral Assassin’ continues to go to town on the hammer, slamming it into the mat until the wood starts to chip away under pressure … AND THE SLEDGEHAMMER BREAKS APART INTO NOTHING!

Enraged, Triple H looks at the bits of hammer, kicking away at them, BEFORE THROWING WHAT’S LEFT OF THE HAMMER OUT OF THE RING, DOWN TO THE FLOOR!

Triple H: Screw it, I don’t need the sledgehammer. I’ll tear that no good son of a bitch to pieces with my bare hands.

~ And the crowd EXPLODES with a pop for Triple H, who shakes with intensity. Bischoff, though, has seen enough.

Eric Bischoff: Hey, Triple H! Triple H!

~ Bischoff finally gains Hunter’s attention, turning him back towards the tron.

Eric Bischoff: Listen, Triple H, this isn’t happening. Not tonight. I get that you’re angry, but until you’re medically cleared you’re a liability to me and my show.

~ BIG heat from the crowd.

Eric Bischoff: So I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to ask you to leave the ring.

~ Bischoff looks on at Triple H, watching as ‘The Game’ looks down to the mat, before slowly turning back to Bischoff.

Triple H: Make me.

~ MASSIVE pop from the crowd for the emphatic statement from Triple H.

Eric Bischoff: What … what did you say?

~ Bischoff looks shocked, but Triple H remains stony faced.

Triple H: I said make me. Either Shawn Michaels gets his ass down to this ring so I can tear him apart limb for limb right here and right now, or I stand here and wait until he has no option but to come out and face me.

~ Another big pop from the crowd. Bischoff, meanwhile, gets up from his seated position on camera.

Eric Bischoff: That’s it. You asked for it.

~ Eric Bischoff exits the shot, seemingly heading out of his office as the live feed cuts. In the arena Triple H still stands in the ring, waiting, hoping to get his hands on his former best friend. Shawn, however, doesn’t appear forthcoming, and Triple H is left off in silence for a moment, until …

???: There he is, gentlemen. In the ring.

~ We look at the top of the stage … and see the RAW General Manager, Eric Bischoff walking out with a microphone, leading a legion of security guards out to some intense heat.

Eric Bischoff: Get that man OUT of my building!

~ The crowd looks on and buzzes as the security team heads to ringside, surrounding the ring in an attempt to force Triple H to realise that he’s against all odds here. Triple H, though, doesn’t seem to care, looking around at the army of guards, ready for a fight.

Eric Bischoff: NOW!


‘The Game’ is fired up, and he’s attacking anyone he can get his hands on, throwing fists at the security guards on the apron … but he’s soon tackled down from behind by the guards from the other side of the ring! The crowd boos as the security force tries to suppress Hunter … ONLY FOR ‘THE GAME’ TO COME OUT OF NOWHERE AND FIGHT ALL OF THEM OFF!

Swinging wildly, Triple H puts up the fight of a lifetime, refusing to be carried out of the ring without a fight, but the numbers once again get the best of him as the guards tackle him down, then hold him there as they try to calm him down. Triple H, however, doesn’t want to be calm, and he continues to kick and flail, albeit to little effect, until the guards finally pin his arms and lift him up to his feet.

With Triple H under their control, the guards head for the ropes with him … BUT TRIPLE H BURSTS AWAY AND CLIMBS FROM THE RING, RUNNING UP THE RAMP … ONLY TO BE ONCE AGAIN CAUGHT BY THE GUARDS!

The security guards get their man again, this time refusing to let go as they drag him up the ramp, past their boss who yells at them to “Get him out of here!”

Joey Styles: I don’t believe this. Despite all of his best efforts, Triple H has been taken from the building, and while I’d like to believe it’s for his own safety, I can’t help but feel that Eric Bischoff is out to protect Shawn Michaels.

Jonathan Coachman: And so he should be, Joe. ‘HBK’ is a precious commodity. You can’t have him being taken out by that mongrel whenever he feels like it. Good on Mr. Bischoff for taking control.

Jerry Lawler: After what Shawn Michaels did to Triple H at Saturday Night’s Main Event, he’s got whatever’s coming to him.

Joey Styles: Agreed, ‘King’, but moving on right now to what we were expecting to see before Triple H made his presence felt, Todd Grisham is standing by backstage. Take it away, Todd!

We cut off backstage, where, as promised, Todd Grisham stands.

Todd Grisham: Thanks Joey. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my guests at this time, they are the World Tag Team Champions, Kane and the Big Show!

The crowd gives a very nice pop as the World Tag Team Champions, Kane & Big Show step into view, their giant frames towering over Grisham as he prepares to speak.

Todd Grisham: Gentlemen, last week we saw the two of you interfere in the match between Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin and Ric Flair and Chavo Guerrero, causing Flair and Chavo to win by disqualification and Haas and Benjamin to challenge you for the World Tag Team Titles. Why?

Big Show: Y’know all week, we’ve been hearin’ the same question. People have been askin’ why we would get involved in somethin’ that doesn’t concern us. As a matter of fact, people have been doin’ one better and askin’ us why we’re scared of Flair an’ Chavo, because that has to be the reason that we gave ‘em the DQ win last week. But y’see, that’s not it. That’s not it at all.

~ A small reaction as Big Show pauses.

Big Show: I mean, first of all, the stipulation to that match? It was about our World Tag Team Titles, so if you ask me, yeah, that does concern us.

~ Small pop from the crowd.

Big Show: Secondly, scared … y’know what? I’ll let Kane handle this one.

~ The crowd remains silent as Kane cackles to himself.

Kane: Us … scared? To all of those people who called us scared of Flair and Guerrero … to all of those people who called us scared of facing a team who is on the same page at WrestleMania … to all of those people who said we were scared that we would LOSE these titles at WrestleMania 22 …

~ Kane pats the belt on his shoulder.

Kane: Let me ask you … do we LOOK scared? No … no we don’t. Another question … have you people seen us over the past six months? Have you not seen what we’ve done? We have been …

~ Kane again begins to cackle away to himself a bit, before continuing.

Kane: We have been completely and utterly DOMINANT!

~ Big pop from the crowd.

Kane: We have faced every team that has come our way and we have torn them APART. And yet people think we’re scared? Those people … who THINK we’re scared … they couldn’t be more WRONG!

~ A small pop from the crowd.

Big Show: It’s like this. For months now, we’ve been sittin’ at the top of the tag team division, and quite frankly, we haven’t had a whole lot to do. There haven’t been a whole lotta teams that we haven’t beaten. But then along come Haas an’ Benjamin, and they … they’re somethin’ different.

~ Small pop from the crowd.

Big Show: Sure, they’re not on the same page, but they’re still one of the greatest tag teams you’ll ever see. Chavo an’ Flair? Yeah, we’ve already beaten them. But Haas an’ Benjamin? Now that’s a whole other story.

~ Another small pop from the crowd.

Big Show: So what we did last week? Consider that us throwin’ down the gauntlet to you, Haas an’ Benjamin. We’re lookin’ for a challenge, so let’s see if you can give us one at WrestleMania.

~ Show smirks, then nods at Kane as the two now walk from view …

… Before we cut off elsewhere backstage, to see the Intercontinental Champion, Ric Flair styling and profiling his way down a corridor, wearing a classy robe over his ring gear.

Joey Styles: Ladies and gentlemen, that was the World Tag Team Champions, but up next it’ll be the Intercontinental Title on the line as ‘The Nature Boy’ Ric Flair defends his title against his close friend, Chavo Guerrero. That’s next here on Monday Night RAW!

Off we head to a commercial break.

*Commercial Break*

And we return from the break to see footage of Triple H being escorted from the arena, now thrown out the door.

Joey Styles: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back here to Monday Night RAW, where after an explosive start, not only have we seen two mega matches announced, but we’ve also now seen ‘The Game’ Triple H ejected from the building by Eric Bischoff!

Jonathan Coachman: Thank you, Mr. Bischoff. Triple H isn’t just a threat to others, but he’s also a threat to himself. Did you not hear that he’s not medically cleared, Joe? Thank God Mr. Bischoff had the sense to make sure he didn’t get injured any further!

Jerry Lawler: I think we all know who Eric Bischoff was looking out for by ejecting Triple H, and it’s not Triple H.

Silence for a moment until we hear the sound of the ring bell tolling, prompting the camera cut across to see Lilian Garcia standing in the ring.

Lilian Garcia: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and it is for the INTERCONTINNENNNNTAL CHAMPIONSHIP!

A big pop from the crowd as we wait …



A very good pop rings out from the crowd as out from the back steps the third generation wrestler, Chavo Guerrero. Guerrero motions for the crowd to get to their feet, and for the most part they comply, continuing to cheer Chavo on as he makes his way down the ramp.

Lilian Garcia: Introducing first, the challenger, from El Paso, Texas, weighing 215 lbs, CHAAAVO GUERRERRROOO!

Joey Styles: Chavo Guerrero has been on quite a roll of late since moving here to Monday Night RAW, and a victory here tonight would not only continue that, but would also cause people to really take notice of him ahead of the Money in the Bank Ladder Match.

Jerry Lawler: Not to mention that the Intercontinental Title would like great alongside the others title in the Guerrero family legacy.

Jonathan Coachman: It doesn’t matter how good it’d look. You heard Gregory Helms last week. This title match is nothin’ but a sham, designed for Flair to say that he “defended” his title.

Joey Styles: You may believe that, ‘Coach’, but I believe we’re about to see a great match between two of the most talented men on the RAW roster.

Jonathan Coachman: Ignorance is bliss, babyboy.

Chavo continues his way down the ramp, then climbs up into the ring, posing for the crowd before readying himself for battle.



The crowd gives a MASSIVE pop as out from the back struts the legend himself, ‘The Nature Boy’, the Intercontinental Champion, Ric Flair. The cries of “WOOOOOOOOOOO” only grow louder from the crowd when Flair himself lets out his familiar cry, before styling and profiling his way on down the ramp, his robe partially hiding the gold that peaks on out from under it.

Lilian Garcia: His opponent, from Charlotte, North Carolina, the reigning and defending INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION, ‘THE NATURE BOY’ RIIIC FLAAAIIIIRRRR!

Joey Styles: An absolute legend of the business, two weeks ago Ric Flair admitted that his first Intercontinental Title reign had been below par, and that from now on he wanted to refocus and put his attention on the title. This has never been shown better than, even with the Money in the Bank Ladder Match looming, he has the title on the line here tonight against ‘The Mexican Warrior’ Chavo Guerrero.

Jonathan Coachman: It must feel good to walk into a title match knowin’ that your opponent is just going to lie down for you anyway.

Jerry Lawler: Chavo Guerrero’s a proud man, and I don’t think he would ever lie down for anyone, even his close friend Ric Flair.

Flair enters the ring and disrobes, before handing his Intercontinental Title to the referee. The ref raises the gold into the air, showing it to the crowd as the match looks set to begin …



The crowd groans, turning to the stage to let out a chorus of boos as Gregory Helms steps out onto the stage with a microphone in hand … dressed to compete!

Gregory Helms: Hey! Hey, Flair, Guerrero. Up here, esses.

~ The crowd boos the arrogance of Helms, who continues to talk as he strides down the ramp.

Gregory Helms: Last week … last week you avoided defendin’ this title one more time, Flair, and for me … for these people, that was crossin’ the line. I couldn’t let this go on anymore. These people … they wanted to see me put an end to the sham of a title reign …

~ Big heat from the crowd as Helms continues to walk down the ring.

Gregory Helms: And this sham of a match between the two of you. So y’know what I did earlier? I went to Mr. Eric Bischoff, and I explained my side … no … I explained our side of the story …

~ Helms motions out to the crowd as he says that, drawing even more heat.

Gregory Helms: And Mr. Bischoff happened to agree with me. He agreed that this match was nothin’ but a cover up for you to “defend” your Intercontinental Title. So here’s what he did … he made this match … between you and Chavo … he made it a Triple Threat Match.

~ Heat from the crowd as Helms now walks up the steel steps and climbs up onto the ring apron, looking in cockily at the frustrated pair of Chavo and Flair.

Gregory Helms: Ric Flair … vs. Chavo Guerrero … vs. ‘Your Hero’, Gregory Helms.

~ More heat from the crowd.

Gregory Helms: And fear not good people, for I promise do the right thing by you, and walk out of here your NEW Intercontinental Champion!

~ More heat as Helms pauses to tear off his ring jacket and throw it to ringside.

Gregory Helms: Referee … ring the bell. It’s time.

The cocky Helms climbs into the ring now, and the referee complies with his request, starting this match.

Match One ~ Intercontinental Championship; Triple Threat Match:
Chavo Guerrero vs. Ric Flair © vs. Gregory Helms

Having been the one to call for the bell, Helms looks ready to go, bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet, while Chavo and Flair stare at him, still shocked that this has suddenly become a Triple Threat Match. The two men glance back and forth, with Helms still readying himself … until he changes his mind and rolls from the ring! The crowd boos the cowardly Helms, who yells at Flair and Chavo to go at it, telling them not to just lie down for one another. Initially shocked, Chavo shakes things off with the shrug of the shoulders, then looks to the defending champion with a cheeky smile, eager to test himself against the greatest of all-time. Ever the competitor, Flair doesn’t back down either, and the two men come forth, locking up.

Wanting to make a good first impression, Chavo is the one to make the first move, grabbing the arm of Flair and yanking it overhead into a wristlock. Chavo holds the move for a moment, only applying a little pressure as he twists on the wrist, allowing Flair to make him pay by snapping out and locking in a wristlock of his own. Chavo grimaces in pain, shocked by the counter, but he soon rolls through, then twists the arm of Flair around and rolls him up out of nowhere … two! Flair kicks out, much to the relief of a panicked Helms, who had began to slide into the ring. Both Flair and Chavo get up, and this time it’s Flair who is able to catch Chavo, getting a small package … two, as Helms breaks it up this time! Gregory doesn’t want to take any risks, diving through the ropes to break up the pin, but as he gets up, he realises both Guerrero and Flair rising too, both men locking their eyes in on him.

Helms shakes his head, not wanting to get involved, before rolling from the ring and attempting to run away, but to no avail as Chavo and Flair roll out opposite sides of the ring and surround him. With nowhere else to go, Helms slides back into the ring, then runs at the ropes as Flair and Chavo slide in … rebounding right into a double elbow! The former superhero and now just hero flops back to his feet, right into the clutches of his waiting opponents, who take it upon themselves to beat the absolute holy hell out of Helms, not at all happy that he has butted his way into their match. Helms finally finds some space when after being sent over with a double suplex he rolls from the ring, leaving the two friends to now once again go at it.

The two nod at one another respectfully, then come forward and slap hands … only for ‘The Dirtiest Player in the Game’ to come out with a poke to the eye of Chavo! Flair then corners Chavo, slapping him across the chest with a few chops … before the lying, cheating and stealing Chavo comes back with a thumb to the eye of his own. The advantage now his, Chavo keeps control of Flair for a short time, all while Gregory Helms remains down on the outside. Chavo continues his dominance though, and following a suplex, seems to think the end is nigh as he heads towards the corner, then climbs up to the top rope … THINKING FROG SPLASH … ONLY FOR GREGORY HELMS TO POP OUT OF NOWHERE AND SHOVE HIM DOWN TO THE FLOOR BELOW!

The cocky Helms has recovered, and he climbs up into the ring, ready to take advantage of a downed Flair … but Flair catches him in a small package out of nowhere … two! Both men get back to their feet, but Flair doesn’t even get a look in as the hatred of Helms takes over, with the youngster forcing Flair back to the corner, then absolutely PUMMELING him, the referee not being able to do anything due to the no DQ nature of the match, with Helms damn near knocking Flair out as he sends him down to a seated position, before backing out of the corner, then charging in and nailing Flair in the skull with a huge knee!

Flair is on dream street in the corner as the crowd boos heavily and Helms declares it over, then pulls Flair out of the corner … AND SETS HIM UP FOR THE VERTEBREAKER … BUT FLAIR SLIPS OUT THE BACK AND FALLS AWAY, CAUSING HELMS TO TURN … RIGHT INTO A SPRINGBOARD DROPKICK FROM CHAVO GUERRERO! The crowd goes nuts as Helms goes down, with Chavo motioning for him to get up … only to tackle him right back down, then storm onto him with a series of right hands, perhaps looking for vengeance for Flair! Helms eventually rolls free, with both men getting back to their feet … AND CHAVO BOOTS HELMS RIGHT IN THE NUTS!

The crowd gasps as Chavo talks some trash, clearly angry with Helms, before hooking him up and nailing a suplex … and he rolls through! Chavo rolls over, then hoists Helms up … second suplex … AND THEN A THIRD! CHAVO NAILS THE THREE AMIGOS! The crowd goes wild as Chavo gets up and calls for the end, heading to the corner … HE’S FEELING FROGGY … AND HE LAUNCHES … BUT HELMS GETS HIS KNEES UP INTO THE BACK OF CHAVO! Guerrero gets up holding his back gingerly, and Helms acts fast … NIGHTMARE ON HELMS STREET! The crowd boos as Helms makes the cover … TWO! FLAIR DRAGS HIM OFF!

Helms is irate as he gets back to his feet, turning to see Flair smiling at him … BEFORE GRABBING HIM RIGHT IN THE NUTS! The crowd goes nuts themselves as Helms hops around the ring in extreme pain, with Flair not relenting … UNTIL HE TRIPS HELMS UP AND THINKS FIGURE FOUR, BUT HELMS PUSHES HIM OFF WITH HIS FREE LEG! Flair hits the turnbuckle … and Helms charges in to nail him with a knee right to the jaw! Flair is knocked stupid as Helms then turns to see Chavo charging at him, so he ducks the clothesline, then kicks Chavo in the midsection … AND QUICKLY HOOKS HIM UP … VETREBREAKER! HELMS GETS IT!

Gregory Helms makes the cover … BUT HE’S DRAGGED OFF AT TWO AND THROWN FROM THE RING BY RIC FLAIR! Flair then makes a cover of his own … AND GETS THE THREE!

Winner (and still Intercontinental Champion): Ric Flair via pinfall @ 8:24



The crowd goes wild as Flair slowly gets to his feet and falls back to a seated position, clearly in pain following the match. A faraway look in his eyes, the beating from Gregory Helms looks to have taken a toll, but in the ring Flair sits victorious, while on the outside Gregory Helms comes to and looks incredulous, irate that Flair took the victory and title out from under his nose.

Joey Styles: Ric Flair has done it! He has retained the Intercontinental Championship, and let’s see you call THAT a sham of a victory, ‘Coach’.

Jonathan Coachman: It was a sham of a victory! Did you not see Ric Flair take advantage of all of Gregory Helms’ work and STEAL the victory? That man should NOT be Intercontinental Champion! Gregory Helms should!

Jerry Lawler: Hey, ‘Coach’, it’s about who gets the pin, and in the end, ‘The Nature Boy’ just outsmarted Gregory Helms. Helms may have been good, but Ric Flair is STILL Intercontinental Champion.

Jonathan Coachman: He didn’t outsmart anyone. What Ric Flair did was out and out cheat, and that is NOT something you wanna see from a champion.

In the ring Flair is now back up to his feet, with Chavo slowly coming too. Noticing his friend, Ric walks across to him, then helps him to his feet to a big cheer to the crowd. Both men smile at one another respectfully, before embracing in a hug.

Joey Styles: Now that’s what this is all about. Some great sportsmanship there by two legends here on Monday Night RAW.

We now cut away from that and head backstage … where we see Carlito seated, looking on at a monitor, presumably having just watched his three RAW opponents come WrestleMania. ‘Lito looks surprisingly calm, nodding away to himself.

Carlito: Those three beating de living hell out of each other? Now dat … das cool.

~ The crowd boos as Carlito mutters to himself … but he’s suddenly interrupted by the presence of someone else in the room.

???: Ahem.

~ ‘Lito turns along with the camera … to see Chris Masters standing in the doorway, a suspicious look on his face.

Chris Masters: ‘Lito, man, it’s good to see you. I haven’t seen you …

~ Masters stops to ponder to himself.

Chris Masters: As a matter of fact, I haven’t seen you since last week’s show, when you promised me you’d talked to Mr. Bischoff about gettin’ me a spot in Money in the Bank. Funny that?

~ Carlito looks surprised, stammering away to himself.

Carlito: H- H- H- Hey ‘Piece. Ju know … yeah … dat … dat is funny. Das very funny.

~ Carlito laughs nervously, though Masters looks far from amused.

Chris Masters: I’m not laughing, Carlito.

~ Realising the seriousness of Masters, Carlito suddenly stops.

Carlito: Uhhh … me … me neither.

~ The crowd laughs at Carlito’s cowardice as he looks from side to side.

Chris Masters: Listen, ‘Lito, I wanted to talk to you about last week, okay? Now did you, or did you not ask Mr. Bischoff for a spot for me in Money in the Bank?

~ Carlito takes a moment, looking far from comfortable.

Carlito: Well …

Chris Masters: No “well” Carlito. Did you, or did you not?

~ Carlito gulps.

Carlito: No … no Carlito didn’t ask Mr. Bischoff, b- b- but Carlito meant to. Honestly, Carlito … Carlito just forgot.

~ Masters shakes his head.

Chris Masters: Yeah, right. This is just like the Elimination Chamber and the Royal Rumble all over again.

~ Carlito shakes his head now, though a lot more frantically than Masters before.

Carlito: No. No, ‘Piece, ju gotta believe me. Dis … dis was just one big mistake. Carlito meant to ask Mr. Bischoff, because … because Carlito needs you. Yeah, das right. Carlito needs you.

~ Masters raises an eyebrow.

Chris Masters: You need me?

~ Carlito nods his head.

Carlito: Yeah, Carlito needs ju to help Carlito win Money in da Bank … whether you’re in it … or not.

~ Masters looks at Carlito, considering his options, before responding.

Chris Masters: I’ll think about it.

~ And with that Masters leaves the shot, leaving a nervous looking Carlito to look on. We, meanwhile, head off to a break.

*Commercial Break*

We return from the break to see the Monday Night RAW General Manager, Eric Bischoff walking down a corridor with some nobody.

Eric Bischoff: Now listen, I want you to tell Shawn Michaels it’s the exact same thing as last week. I’ve taken care of Triple H for him, now all he has to do is take care of RVD, okay?

Nobody: Okay, Mr. Bischoff.

~ Our nobody now takes off, leaving Bischoff as he gets to a door and stops, opening what appears to be the door to his office … only to stop in his tracks, as in his office, sitting on the couch is the WWE Champion, Edge, with his girlfriend Lita. The crowd boos the pair as Edge goes to stand.

Edge: Oh, hey Eric. Were you … were you not expecting us?

~ Bischoff sighs, then responds reluctantly.

Eric Bischoff: What do you want, Edge?

Edge: What do I want?

~ Edge strokes his chin thoughtfully.

Edge: Hmm, what do I want? What could I possibly want? Oh, I know.

~ Edge snaps back into a serious mode.

Edge: I want to know just why in the HELL I’m in a match with Rob Van Dam.

~ Pop from the crowd for the RVD mention.

Edge: Didn’t you hear me earlier, Eric? Huh? Did you not hear me when I said I didn’t want to compete again until WrestleMania? Allow me to make myself perfectly clear, in case I didn’t earlier. As your champion, I – do not – want - to compete – until – Wrestle – Mania. Ya got that?

~ Heat from the crowd as Bischoff stands before Edge emphatically.

Eric Bischoff: Well as your General Manager, I do want you to compete, okay?

~ A mixed reaction from the crowd.

Eric Bischoff: But your match tonight? I actually did it as a favour to you.

~ Edge looks mystified by that claim.

Eric Bischoff: Yeah, that’s right, a favour, and here’s why. You may have noticed that RVD’s on double duty tonight, and let me assure you, that’s no mistake. There’s a reason for that, and that reason is this – tonight, I want RVD taken out once and for all.

~ Heat from the crowd.

Eric Bischoff: Now this is where you come into things, because tonight, you have the chance to take RVD out.

~ Edge scoffs, clearly not on the same page as Bischoff.

Edge: And just why in the hell would I want to do that?

~ Bischoff smiles, a plan clearly in mind.

Eric Bischoff: Because not only if you take RVD out will one of your WrestleMania opponents, John Cena find himself in a handicap match …

~ Heat as a devious smile starts to cross Edge’s face.

Eric Bischoff: But also, if you take RVD out tonight, I’m willing to let you have the next two weeks off, to freshen up, shall we say, for WrestleMania.

~ Edge’s devious smile is now a full grin, going from ear to ear.

Edge: Y’know what, Bischoff? You’ve got yourself a deal.

~ And with that Edge motions for Lita to leave, which she of course does, joining her boyfriend in exiting the office.

We, meanwhile, cut back to ringside to hear …



OH YEAH! The crowd gives some decent heat as out from the back bounces The Spirit Squad, fronted by their benevolent leader Kenny Doane, who already has a microphone.

Joey Styles: Oh no.

Jonathan Coachman: Oh yeah!

The Squad stops at the top of the stage, with Kenny at the front, beginning to speak.

Kenny Doane: Y’know, last week we came out here and we told you people that we are the biggest …

~ “WHAT?”

Kenny Doane: The baddest …

~ “WHAT?”

Kenny Doane: And the meanest team to ever step foot in the WWE.

~ “WHAT?”

Kenny Doane: And boy, did we ever back that up in the ring!

~ The crowd gives some great heat as the other four morons bounce around in the background, slapping each other high fives.

Kenny Doane: But some people have said that last week … that last week proved nothing! That all we did was win a five on two match, and that anyone could do that!

~ The crowd cheers, obviously agreeing.

Kenny Doane: Squad, is that the right spirit?

~ The whole Spirit Squad leans forward to the mic.

All: NO!

~ The crowd boos the idiocy of The Spirit Squad.

Kenny Doane: I didn’t think so, which is why tonight we are gonna step foot in that ring with five of the toughest cats we could find!

~ Mikey Mondo leans in.

Mikey Mondo: OH YEAH!

~ Heat for Mondo, who receives high fives from all of his buddies in the background.

Kenny Doane: So tonight, we’re gonna prove that we’re the biggest … the baddest … and the meanest team Monday Night RAW has ever seen!

~ Again, Mondo leans in.

Mikey Mondo: YEAH BABY!

~ Mondo again receives plaudits from his team-mates for his stunning performance.

Kenny Doane: Spirit Squad … let’s show these idiots what spirit is all about!

The Squad now advances down the ramp, before springing up into the ring off their trampoline where we see their competition … five local boys. Oh, you should be surprised.

Joey Styles: The Spirit Squad are going to prove they’re the quote unquote “biggest, baddest and meanest team on Monday Night RAW” by facing five local wrestlers? Oh come on.

Jonathan Coachman: Hey, Joe, I spoke to these five guys who The Spirit Squad are facin’, and they’re some of the best talent San Antonio has ever seen. Five mini Shawn Michaels right there.

Joey Styles: Oh yeah, ‘Coach’? Then what’s their names?

Jonathan Coachman: That’s not the important thing, babyboy. What’s important is that The Squad’s gonna show what they’re all about – spirit.

The mess of people in the ring sorts itself out, and we get this one underway.

Match Two ~ Ten Man Tag Team Match:
The Spirit Squad vs. The J.O.B. Squad

The less famous 2006 version of the J.O.B. Squad, featuring absolutely no one of note doesn’t even put up a fight at all. Just like last week, The Spirit Squad completely destroys their opponents in goofy fashion, complete with the High Spirits and Sky High Leg Drop from their leader, Kenny Doane to gain the three.

Winners: The Spirit Squad via pinfall @ 1:43


Lilian Garcia: Here are your winners, THE SPIRIT SQUAD!

The Spirit Squad goes absolutely crazy in the ring in celebration, looking like they’ve all just won world titles at WrestleMania, rather than having just squashed five jobbers in under two minutes.

Joey Styles: That was a joke.

Jonathan Coachman: What do you mean, Joe? My boys were impressive in there. Did you not see that Sky High Leg Drop by Kenny Doane? The kid is just 20 years old, and he can already pull somethin’ off like that! It’s a thing of beauty, babyboy.

Joey Styles: It may be, and yeah, The Spirit Squad looked good, but if they actually want to prove themselves, then they should face some actual competition, instead of whatever local wrestlers they can find.

Jerry Lawler: I agree with, Joey. I mean, that didn’t do much for me to prove that The Spirit Squad are the biggest or baddest. It just showed me they can bully smaller men.

Joey Styles: Impressive or not, The Spirit Squad are here to stay from the look of things, but moving on right now to backstage, where Maria is standing by.

We cut away to the interview area to see the always lovely Maria.

Maria: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my guest at this time, Rob … Van … Dam!

The crowd gives a big pop as Rob Van Dam steps into view, looking as calm as ever despite his current situation.

Maria: Rob, RAW General Manager Eric Bischoff has made these past few weeks hard for you, and with two matches tonight, things don’t look to be getting any easier. Do you maybe regret challenging The Undertaker to a match at WrestleMania 22 now, or do you still stick by it?

Rob Van Dam: Y’know Maria, last week I got the exact same question from Todd Grisham, and I gave him what I thought was the right answer. Last week … last week I said “NO”, I didn’t regret laying down the challenge to The Undertaker. But this week … this week Eric Bischoff has thrown a lot more at me. I mean, I don’t just have Shawn Michaels comin’ for me. I also have Edge.

~ Heat from the crowd for the WWE Champion.

Rob Van Dam: Now Edge, he’s a heck of a wrestler. A tough dude. Hell, he’s the WWE Champion, and it takes a lotta talent to be WWE Champion. Trust me, I think I’m pretty talented, but I’ve never held it before. And from what I’ve heard, this isn’t just any match for Edge. There’s a bit on the line for him here. So he’s probably gonna want to go out and do anything he can to take me out.

~ RVD pauses slightly, thinking, picking things up a bit as he continues.

Rob Van Dam: But then, even if I survive that, even if I can survive whatever Edge throws at me, I’ve still got Shawn Michaels comin’ for me in a tag team match.

~ VERY mixed reaction for Shawn in his hometown.

Rob Van Dam: With Hunter outta the way tonight thanks to Bischoff, I’m all he’s got to worry about. I’m the only thing on his mind. So even if I survive Edge, who’s to say I’ll survive Shawn Michaels? I’ll tell you who … I am.

~ A big cheer from the crowd.

Rob Van Dam: Because as much as Eric Bischoff doesn’t want to admit it, last week, when I stepped foot in the ring with Shawn Michaels, I proved that I belong in the ring with the very best in this business. Now two of those guys in one night? Yeah, I’ll admit, it’s gonna be tough. But like I’ve told The Undertaker before, it doesn’t matter to me. Bischoff can’t confuse me with whatever he’s throwing at me. My mind is clear, and I know what I’ve gotta do. I’m not goin’ out there just to survive tonight … I’m goin’ out there to win!

~ A great pop from the crowd.

Rob Van Dam: And at the end of the night, when Edge and Shawn Michaels walk away from this arena, they’ll know why they smell like fire. They’ll know it’s because they’ll have just had their ass smoked, courtesy of everybody’s favourite superstar, R – V – D!

~ The crowd gives a big cheer as RVD gets set to walk away, before stopping and turning back to the microphone.

Rob Van Dam: Oh, and Undertaker, as far as what you said on SmackDown!? Bring your best shot tonight, dude, ‘cause I’ll be ready.

~ RVD now smiles and leaves the set.

Joey Styles: RVD’s first of two matches is up next. It’s RVD vs. the WWE Champion, Edge, live here next on Monday Night RAW!

And off we go to a break.

*Commercial Break*

We return backstage in the interview area, with Todd Grisham standing by.

Todd Grisham: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my guests at this time, Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin!

The crowd gives a decent pop as Charlie Haas & Shelton Benjamin step into view.

Todd Grisham: Gentlemen, earlier we heard Kane and the Big Show giving their reasons for why they cost you guys your match last week, forcing you to team up at WrestleMania. Your thoughts?

Shelton Benjamin: Our thoughts? Our thoughts? Our thoughts are simple. What Kane an’ Big Show did last week … that was BULLSHIT!

~ A surprised reaction from the crowd at the explicative from Benjamin, who has always seemed a lot more reserved.

Shelton Benjamin: For the first time in ages, I’m here at RAW not in a tag team match, and the only reason for that is ‘cause I’ve got one at WrestleMania. Kane and Big Show can say that they had business in our match last week all they want, but the fact of the matter is they didn’t. We weren’t fightin’ for a chance to challenge them for the World Tag Team Titles. We were fightin’ for a spot in Money in the Bank ‘cause we didn’t want to face those two giants in the first place.

~ Benjamin tones it down a level.

Shelton Benjamin: It’s just too damn bad that the reason they interfered is ‘cause they’re lookin’ for a challenge, ‘cause now that they’re facin’ us, that’s the opposite of what they’re gonna get.

~ Some small heat from the crowd.

Shelton Benjamin: We don’t wanna face ‘em at WrestleMania, and we certainly don’t wanna win. WrestleMania is just the last night before the start of our new careers because Eric Bischoff won’t let us out of this match, not that we ever wanted to be in it in the first place. So …

Charlie Haas: Y’know what, Shelton? I think you’ve said enough. I think it’s time that you speak for yourself.

~ A surprised pop as Charlie Haas lets his voice be heard, shocking Shelton.

Charlie Haas: I’m sick and tired of listening to you say “we” this and “we” that like you speak for me, because you don’t. Only I speak for me.

~ Another pop for Haas.

Charlie Haas: And y’know, I think it’s enough with the whole agreeing to not team together thing, because last I checked, I do want to team with you. But not because you’re better than me and ‘cause I wanna get in the limelight with you. No, it’s because I wanna help you.

~ Shelton raises an eyebrow, surprised at this perhaps more than anything.

Charlie Haas: That’s right. Since I’ve been back, you’ve been talkin’ about how you’re too good to team with me, and how you’re a former Intercontinental Champion, and y’know what? You are, so congratulations. You were successful without me. At least at first. But since you lost that title, you’ve spent months losing to anyone on the roster. The only matches you’ve been winning have been when you’ve teamed with me.

~ A very nice pop from the crowd.

Charlie Haas: So Shelton, you’re not too good for me. No, and y’know, I’m willing to prove it. You wanna see that I can go just as well as you can? Big Show and Kane wanna challenge? I’ll tell you what. I’ll hit two birds with one stone.

~ Rather than looking at Benjamin, Haas now stares down the lens of the camera.

Charlie Haas: Big Show … I’m challenging you to a match, next week here on RAW, one on one.

~ A big pop for the gutsy Haas.

Charlie Haas: You wanna challenge? You got it. And then when I’m done with you …

~ Haas now turns back to Benjamin.

Charlie Haas: We’ll just see who’s the world’s greatest.

~ Another good pop as Haas walks from view, leaving a shocked looking Benjamin to stand still with Todd Grisham.

We don’t remain there too long though, as we now cut back to ringside.

Joey Styles: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Monday Night RAW, where Charlie Haas has just well and truly thrown the gauntlet down. He wants to prove himself to Shelton Benjamin, and he’ll do it next week he says when he goes one on one with the Big Show, if the Big Show accepts his challenge.

Jerry Lawler: And what a match that’s gonna be. I know Charlie wanted to prove himself, but he’s throwing himself right in the deep end there!

Silence for a momentum, before …



The crowd goes CRAZY with heat, as, not for the first time tonight, out from the back through the smoke emerges the WWE Champion, Edge. Not smiling like earlier, Edge now has a determined look on his face, set for action as his girlfriend Lita follows him down the ramp, massaging his shoulders as they go.

Lilian Garcia: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Toronto, Ontario, Canada, weighing 245 lbs, he is the W – W – E CHAMPIIIOOOON, ‘THE RATED R SUUUUUPPPPPEEERRRSTAR’, EDGE!

Joey Styles: Earlier tonight we heard this man Edge saying he didn’t want to compete again until WrestleMania, and in a strange turn of events, if Edge does satisfactory damage to RVD, as judged by Eric Bischoff, Edge could well be granted those two weeks off thanks to the man who has put him in numerous tricky spots in the past in Bischoff.

Jonathan Coachman: I knew Mr. Bischoff would come through in the end for Edge, and he’s gonna do it in a big way tonight! All Edge has to do is take out the trash – literally!

Jerry Lawler: You say that like it’s an easy task, but Shawn Michaels couldn’t do it to RVD last week. There’s no guarantee that Edge will be able to tonight.

Edge slides down into the ring, then circles around, eager to get the match kicked underway tonight.


The crowd goes into a FRENZY as out from the back calmly steps Rob Van Dam. RVD holds his arms out with a smile on his face, looking as relaxed as ever as he comes down the ramp, despite the circumstances he finds himself in.

Lilian Garcia: His opponent, from Battle Creek, Michigan, weighing 235 lbs, ROB – VAN – DAM!

Joey Styles: As you pointed out, ‘King’, last week it was Shawn Michaels, now this week it’s Edge who’s gonna be trying to take RVD out. Or at least he’ll have the first shot at it, because RVD is also scheduled to take part in our tag team main event later tonight.

Jonathan Coachman: Trust me, RVD is NOT gonna make is that far. If he thinks he can just waltz on past the WWE Champion, he’s about to find out that isn’t the case.

Jerry Lawler: We heard how highly RVD rates Edge earlier. I don’t think he thinks this is gonna be easy, but he does look confident.

RVD does his signature taunt as his name is announced, before walking his way down the rest of the ramp and rolling into the ring … WHERE EDGE INSTANTLY AMBUSHES HIM, KICKING THE MATCH OFF WITH A BANG!

Match Three ~ Singles Match:
WWE Champion Edge w/Lita vs. Rob Van Dam

This match is off with a real bang, with Edge having forced RVD back into the corner so he can blast him with a quick series of kicks and right hands. With RVD already reeling, Edge then backs out of the corner and charges in, looking for a running shoulder thrust … but RVD elevates himself, wrapping his legs around Edge’s body so he can catch him with a sunset flip … two! Both men get up and this time RVD is first to the punch, ready to strike as he forces Edge all of the way back against the ropes. ‘The Rated R Superstar’ is vulnerable, and RVD knows it, sending him off with an Irish whip, before catching him with a drop toe hold on the rebound! Edge holds his face, falling onto his back, and RVD continues to go along with the theme of the fast start to the match by quickly dashing off to the ropes and thinking rolling thunder … but Edge rolls away out to the floor! RVD stops himself from jumping, before shrugging his shoulders … AND LAUNCHING HIMSELF OVER THE TOP ROPE DOWN ONTO THE FLOOR ONTO EDGE WITH A PLANCHA!

The crowd goes wild as RVD is the first man up, taking a bow and soaking up the reaction from the crowd, before moving back after Edge. The WWE Champion tries to crawl away, looking for space, but RVD simply won’t allow it, first kicking Edge in the ribs, then hoisting him up in a suplex position where he lands a few jabs to the midsection of Edge … all leading to RVD then dropping Edge midsection first across the crowd barrier!

The crowd goes nuts as RVD climbs up onto the apron and does his good old thumb taunt … only to then be distracted by Lita, who climbs up onto the apron! The crowd boos as RVD and Lita mouth off at one another, with Lita audibly telling RVD he’ll never be able to beat The Undertaker, angering RVD … ONLY FOR RVD TO BE SUDDENLY TAKEN OUT WITH A CHOP BLOCK BY EDGE! RVD falls on the apron awkwardly, his hitting smacking off the mat before he tumbles in a heap down to the floor. Edge initially allows the referee to count, seemingly content with the count out, before remembering he has to do more to RVD and bringing him into the ring, leaving us as we go to an ad break.

Back from the break, and the WWE Champion is still in complete control, working over the knee of RVD like we’ve seen in almost every match that RVD’s competed in since his return. Despite the continued focus on RVD’s leg by the heels, Van Dam is resolute, refusing to quit due to the heavy work Edge puts in, even surviving a half Boston crab. This frustrates the WWE Champion, who after breaking the hold, stomps away at RVD’s leg, trying to do even more damage. Edge then goes to lift RVD out, but RVD’s injured wheel seemingly gives way on him, not allowing him to get up. Edge continues to try to lift his foe, but to no avail, as he keeps just falling back to the mat.

Realising he may have accomplished his goal of injuring RVD, Edge decides the time is right to finish the job … backing off to the corner … AND CROUCHING DOWN FOR THE SPEAR! The crowd boos as RVD slowly gets back to his feet, looking awfully ginger on that one leg, then turns … SPEAR … NO! RVD KICKS EDGE RIGHT IN THE JAW WITH A SPINNING HEEL KICK! HE WAS PLAYING POSSUM! The crowd erupts as RVD makes the cover … TWO!

The kickout does nothing to deter Van Dam, who assists a groggy WWE Champion back to his feet, then begins to pepper him with rights and lefts, before sending him off to the ropes and catching him with a back body drop on the rebound! Edge hits the mat hard, rising back up to the mat quickly right into Van Dam, who whips him into the corner then follows him in with some driving shoulder tackles. The crowd cheers as RVD backs away, then comes back in … and with practically one leg executes a monkey flip! Edge goes down into a perfect position near the ropes, and RVD runs off to the opposite ones, then comes back looking for rolling thunder … BUT EDGE TRIPS HIM UP OUT OF NOWHERE … AND LOCKS IN THE SHARPSHOOTER!

The crowd erupts for the old Canadian favourite, giving some great heat as Edge leans right back in the hold, causing pain to shoot not just through the injured leg of RVD, but also through his lower back. With the hold being considerably harder to break than the half crab due to Edge having all of his strength applied to holding RVD in place, this is much more of a struggle for Van Dam, who not only has to think about whether it’s worth continuing in this match, but also that he has another match later in the night that he’s meant to compete in! Despite the smarter option perhaps being to tap out, RVD grits his teeth and fight on, pulling himself towards the ropes … PROMPTING EDGE TO WALK HIM BACK TOWARDS THE MIDDLE OF THE RING!

The crowd can’t believe it, as RVD is surely finished, caught damn near in the middle of the ring. ‘The Whole Damn Show’ attempts to claw his way towards the ropes, but they’re seemingly an eternity away, causing him to raise his hand up into the air …


The crowd erupts with a pop, but Edge is far from amused, keeping the hold locked in for a little longer, before finally letting go and tugging at his long locks, angry at the fact he couldn’t force RVD to submit. Lita turns her man’s attention back towards RVD though, and the champion looks to go back to work, lifting RVD up, then sending him off with an Irish whip, although RVD is able to duck under a clothesline on the rebound, perhaps aided by his slower than usual run … before striking with a kick to the face! Edge goes down, and RVD runs off to the ropes … rolling thunder finally connects! RVD makes the cover … two!

The crowd can’t believe it as RVD gets to his feet, lifting Edge up with him before sending him into the corner, then charging in and striking with a huge corner spin kick! Edge is practically out on his feet, allowing RVD to pick him up and scoop him down with ease … THEN GO FOR … AND NAIL THE SPLIT LEGGED MOONSAULT! RVD hooks the leg … TWO!

The crowd responds in shock, gasping at the kickout that even causes RVD to look at the referee quizzically, before getting back on with business, heading for the corner. Unfortunately for Van Dam, his knee injury is obviously having a negative effect, and he struggles as he climbs the ropes. This gives Edge time to recover, and with him so near to the ropes, he only has to get up to strike RVD with a right hand from close range. Edge continues to rock Van Dam a few more times, before climbing up the ropes with him and thinking superplex … but Van Dam fights him off, showing his determination with some blistering right hands, before a kick to the side of the head sends Edge tumbling down to the mat below. The WWE Champion gets back to his feet … and gets struck with a thrust kick right to the side of the head! This sends Edge across the ring, causing Van Dam to drag his tired body to the cover … TWO!

Edge again escapes, showing the pain threshold required to be WWE Champion, causing RVD to wonder what he has to do to defeat the champion. RVD seems to struggle with himself for a moment, before climbing back up to his feet and lifting Edge up too … only for Edge to rake his eyes! The crowd boos as Edge takes the easy way out with the rake of the eyes … THEN HOOKS RVD UP FOR THE EDGECUTION … BUT RVD SPINS OUT OF IT AND ROLLS EDGE UP … TWO! Both men get up, RVD looking immediately for a clothesline, but Edge ducks … EDGE-O-MATIC … NO, RVD HAS A COUNTER FOR THAT TOO, WRAPPING HIS LEGS AROUND EDGE AND ROLLING HIM FORWARD INTO A VICTORY ROLL OF SORTS … TWO!

Van Dam seemingly has a counter to everything Edge can bring, the two climbing up once more … AND EDGE JUST PLAIN BOOTS VAN DAM IN THE FACE! Nothing fancy there as Edge runs with what works, knocking Van Dam out of his socks with the boot … before heading for the corner … AND CALLING FOR THE SPEAR! RVD slowly pulls himself up, unaware of what is happening behind him as Edge readies himself … SPEAR! WAIT … NO … RVD SUPERKICKS EDGE RIGHT IN THE JAW! EDGE LUNGES FORWARD RIGHT INTO A SUPERKICK! The crowd erupts as Edge is sent rolling from the ring by the force of the move … BUT RVD IS RIGHT ON IT, CHARGING TO THE ROPES, THEN COMING OVER WITH A SOMERSAULT PLANCHA!

Both men go down on the outside to a huge pop, and they remain there for a moment, before RVD goes to lift Edge up … but Edge rams him back into the apron … THEN DECIDES HE’S HAD ENOUGH AND BACKS UP OFF THE RAMP! With Lita carrying his WWE Title, Edge heads for the back, leaving a confused looking Van Dam to roll back into the ring and get the count out victory.

Winner: Rob Van Dam via count out @ 12:01

No music plays and no announcement is made. Instead we remain in silence as RVD stands in the ring, alone.

Joey Styles: Well Edge has said that he’ll get the job done for Eric Bischoff but did he … did he just run away?

Jonathan Coachman: He didn’t run away, he … he just left some of RVD for Shawn Michaels to take care of!

Jerry Lawler: I think he ran away, ‘Coach’.

Things remain silent for RVD in the ring …


The crowd erupts with a huge pop as the familiar gong rings throughout the arena, prompting the lights to go out.


The lights remain out, with absolutely nothing happening …


The crowd goes nuts as the lights come back on … AND RVD IS STILL STANDING THERE! The mind games clearly not working, RVD just smirks to himself as the crowd looks on in awe.

Joey Styles: Oh my God! What the … what the hell was that?

Jerry Lawler: I think that was The Undertaker … and I think ‘Coach’ needs a change of pants.

Joey Styles: But look at RVD. He’s still standing there in the middle of the ring. Ladies and gentlemen, if you needed any more proof after last week that RVD isn’t afraid of The Undertaker, you’ve got it right there.

Jonathan Coachman: What’s WRONG with Van Dam? Why isn’t he scared?

Joey Styles: You heard him last week, ‘Coach’. RVD doesn’t let anything psych him out, and apparently that includes The Undertaker. Speaking of psychology though, up next we’ll be chatting with Mickie James’ psychiatrist, following the past few weeks of assaults at the hands of Trish Stratus. That’s next on Monday Night RAW.

We head off to a break.

*Commercial Break*

We get back from the break not at ringside, but rather backstage, where we see the WWE Champion, Edge stumbling down a corridor, holding his head in pain, with his girlfriend Lita holding the gold not far behind. Edge is clearly in a lot of pain, still grimacing away to himself until …

???: Hey! HEY EDGE!

~ Edge turns around … to see none other than the Monday Night RAW General Manager, Eric Bischof enter the shot to a big reaction of heat!

Eric Bischoff: What the hell was that? I thought we had a deal!

~ Edge looks pissed, getting fired up by Bischoff’s presence.

Edge: What was that? What was that? That was me deciding that I’m not going to be your puppet. I’m the WWE Champion! The W – W – E Champion. I am NO ONE’S puppet!

~ Heat from the crowd as Bischoff looks set to bite back.

Eric Bischoff: You want the deal off? Y’know what? That’s fine!

~ Edge looks someone relieved, though he still breathes heavily.

Eric Bischoff: Yeah, that’s fine, because my part of the deal? It’s off too!

~ Edge almost laughs at Bischoff mockingly.

Edge: You think I care? Did you not hear me before? I’m the WWE Champion! It doesn’t matter who you throw at me!

Eric Bischoff: Good, because over the next few weeks you’ll be going one on one with John Cena AND Kurt Angle!

~ A HUGE pop from the crowd.

Eric Bischoff: Let’s see if it matters now, champ.

Bischoff walks from the view pissed, while an angered Edge starts to panic, before lashing out at a crate, kicking it as hard as he can!

From there we cut back to ringside where we see our announce team.

Joey Styles: Oh my God! What an announcement from Eric Bischoff. Over the next few weeks Edge will go one on one with his challengers for WrestleMania, BOTH Kurt Angle AND John Cena!

Jonathan Coachman: No Mr. Bischoff! Why?

Jerry Lawler: He obviously wasn’t happy to see Edge walking out on his match with RVD, and he’s decided to pay.

Joey Styles: On a more personal note, ladies and gentlemen, momentarily we’re going to be joined by Mickie James’ psychologist, Dr. Hayden Stojkovic. But before we do that, we just want to give you a brief look on what has happened to Mickie over the past few weeks.


Footage of Mickie James apologising to Trish at Saturday Night’s Main Event, explaining herself and her life, only for Trish to both physically and mentally abuse her is shown, along with footage of the same happening on last week’s Monday Night RAW.


We return back to ringside to see our announce team are looking up at the screen to see Dr. Hayden Stojkovic, who looks middle aged, balding with a brown mullet and a reasonably sophisticated suit on. Yes, I just described Frasier Crane.

Joey Styles: Thank you for joining us, Dr. Stojkovic, here on Monday Night RAW.

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: It’s no problem.

Jerry Lawler: Now, first of all, Doctor, I was wondering if you could explain the nature of your relationship with Mickie James, and how long you’ve known her.

~ Stojkovic looks quite uncomfortable, but he goes ahead.

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: Before I say anything else, I just wish to state that this is usually information that is confidential between the patient and the doctor. Ms. James, however, has agreed to allow me to share with you this information in the public domain, and that’s why I’m speaking on her behalf.

~ Stojkovic once again pauses, clearing his throat.

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: My relationship with Ms. James is simple. I have been her lifetime psychiatrist.

Joey Styles: So that means you’ve had a professional relationship with Mickie for her whole life?

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: Yes. I have been Ms. James’ psychiatrist from a very young age.

Jerry Lawler: Can you possibly give us any details about what brought these meetings on?

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: Ms. James came to me at a very young age due to a lack of social abilities. From a very young age she had troubles reaching out to the other children and making a connection to them. She lacked the abilities to do so, because as you may have noticed, Ms. James isn’t quite as normal as you or I. Not only has she lacked ever having anyone around her in her life, preventing her from knowing how she should be interacting with others, but she also suffers from a disability that prevents her from being able to read the facial expressions of others.

~ The psychiatrist pauses for a moment.

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: You may be nervous. You may be sad. You may be angry. You may even be happy, but Ms. James has no way of knowing. All she can do is assume the emotion of the person she is talking to and hope that she is right.

~ A slight pause from dramatic effect.

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: As I mentioned before, Ms. James has also lacked human interaction from a very young age, and as a result she is unsure of how to not just act, but also react around others. She came to me at a very young age to try to rectify that, but unfortunately it cannot be fixed completely until she has constant human interaction whilst also coming to her appointments so that we can analyse what went wrong with what she’s done and what went right. As I’m sure you can tell, that has not happened just quite yet.

Jonathan Coachman: But you’ve been seeing her your entire life. How has the opportunity for you to do that NOT come up yet? This all sounds a little fishy to me.

~ The doctor sighs, looking not too comfortable about being in this position.

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: Through Ms. James’ early life, she lacked the courage to approach other people. The main reason her grandfather brought her to me was because of this. With no mother for her to interact with most of the time, Ms. James didn’t understand how she should interact with others, or how to even begin to interact with others.

Jonathan Coachman: But what about since she’s been here in the WWE? Or even when she trained to become a pro wrestler? Surely you could have helped her in that time. She’s been interacting with people all of the time here!

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: She has indeed, but when I saw Ms. James this week it was the first time I had seen her in over four years. As she told you, when Ms. James got up and left home for the dream of becoming a professional wrestler, she left everything behind. She left behind the home she had grown up in, the small family she had grown up with and everything else that surrounded her. That included me.

~ Another awkward pause, with ‘Coach’ now biting his tongue.

Joey Styles: What can you tell us about Mickie’s current state? Are the rumours that she is here in the building tonight, yet under order not to appear by you true?

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: Ms. James, psychologically, is in the worst state she’s ever been in. As I’m sure you know, the one person she felt she could connect with, who she felt could understand her was the woman she left home to emulate … Trish Stratus.

~ A big mixed reaction for Trish, mainly leaning towards boos.

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: Ms. James thought that Ms. Stratus was more than just her friend, but also her mentor. That was significant in two ways. As you know, Ms. James didn’t have any friends as a child. But it’s not only that either. She never had that mother figure either to guide her, and she looked up at Ms. Stratus and gave her that role of the mother figure. She looked up to her for guidance.

~ Another pause for dramatic effect.

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: Physically, Ms. James is okay. Those scars have healed. But mentally … mentally, those scars may never heal. Ms. James may forever be left mentally scarred in one way or another.

~ An awkward pause as the doctor is unsure of what to say next.

Jerry Lawler: But what about tonight? Is she backstage tonight?

Dr. Hayden Stojkovic: Yes, Ms. James is backstage tonight. However, she is under strict order not to appear for her own mental safety. She is in a very fragile state at this point, and …


The crowd gives some very good heat for the sudden interruption as Trish Stratus walks out, microphone already in hand, ready to talk.

Trish Stratus: Y’know what? I think I’ll start to answer the questions about Mickie James.

~ Trish looks up, noticing the psychiatrist still on the screen.

Trish Stratus: Thanks for steppin’ up, shrink, but I’ve got this. It’s been fun having you though. Bye-bye now.

~ Trish waves innocently at the tron, which the psychiatrist soon disappears from, with Trish now turning towards the ramp and walking down to the ring.

Trish Stratus: So we’re out here to talk about Mickie James, huh? Boy, have I got a lot I could say about her.

~ Trish climbs up the steel steps and through into the ring, still holding the microphone.

Trish Stratus: What as your last question, ‘King’? Is Mickie James here tonight? Was that … was that it?

~ Trish looks over to ‘King’, but no one from the announce team says a word.

Trish Stratus: Oh, what’s the matter, ‘King’? Cat got your tongue? Y’know what … that’s fine, because I can do this little interview about Mickie James all by myself.

~ Heat from the crowd.

Trish Stratus: Now, as touching as that interview was – really, it was a real tearjerker – I hate to do this, but I have to come out here and play the role of the partypooper. Because, y’see, as much as I just hate to let you know, of course Mickie James is backstage. Of course she’s in the arena tonight. She’s here.

~ Small pop from the crowd.

Trish Stratus: I mean, she has to be here. She had to tell that “shrink” what to say.

~ Heat from the crowd.

Trish Stratus: Didn’t you see her? She was just off to the side there, whispering to him what he had to say! I mean, you don’t believe he was actually a shrink, do you? Did any of you happen to catch his name? Hayden? What kind of a name is that?

~ Trish laughs to herself as the crowd boos.

Trish Stratus: Trust me, if a kid is named Hayden, he is not going to be smart enough to get a job as a psychiatrist!

~ More heat from the crowd for Trish.

Trish Stratus: But hey, I guess it’s kind of fitting that Mickie went out and found herself a fraud of her own to represent her, eh?

~ More boos from the crowd as Trish laughs some more.

Trish Stratus: So now that we’ve got that out of the way, how about I tell you the real story about Mickie James, m’kay? A story about selfishness. About greed. Y’see, Mickie James’ life … Mickie James’ life isn’t the hard luck story she’ll have you believe. Mickie James’ life and her career here in the WWE, it’s built around lies and deception.

~ Heat.

Trish Stratus: I mean, let’s look at what she’s done since she arrived here in the WWE. First she met me backstage, claiming to be my “number one fan” and that she’d just been signed. Yeah, right.

~ More heat for the sarcasm of Trish.

Trish Stratus: But then she claimed she wanted to “help” me. Yeah, she wanted to help me and my friend Ashley to fight off the other divas who were targeting us to try to get to my Women’s Title. Oh, by the way, did I mention that it was during that time that Mickie also ran Ashley off Monday Night RAW?

~ More heat from the crowd.

Trish Stratus: But she just wanted to be our friend, didn’t she? She just wanted to be my friend, and she’d never do anything to hurt me. After all, accidents happen, don’t they Mickie?

~ Yet again the crowd boos.

Trish Stratus: Look Mickie, it’s like this. You can pretend that you’re not just plotting against me and my Women’s Title. You can pretend that you didn’t mean to take out my friends, that you didn’t mean to take out Ashley or Rebecca. But Mickie, what you’re pretending and what I know … they’re entirely different things. You can keep lying to these people and telling them you have emotional issues, but deep down, I know you’re nothing … but a fraud.

~ More heat from the crowd, not that Trish gives a damn.

Trish Stratus: So Mickie, let your little sob story continue all of the way until WrestleMania, so I can write my own chapter in the book of Mickie James. The night Trish Stratus got redemption and ran Mickie James out of the WWE … for good.

~ Trish smirks, proud of herself and what she’s said, only to suddenly hear …


The crowd doesn’t really react at first, although they eventually give a decent pop as Ashley Massaro walks out onto the stage. Nodding at the audience, Ashley makes her way down the ramp and joins Trish in the ring, a microphone of her own in hand.

Trish Stratus: Ashley, it’s, uh … it’s nice to see you. Just like last week, but I thought … I thought you were gone.

Ashley Massaro: No Trish, I was gone. And just to acknowledge what you said earlier, yeah, it was because of Mickie James.

~ A small bit of heat as Trish nods along.

Ashley Massaro: But Trish … after listening to what you’ve had to say for the past few weeks, if anyone needs a psychiatrist … it’s you!

~ A big pop from the crowd as Trish looks shocked.

Ashley Massaro: You think Mickie James pretended to have emotional issues just to get a shot at your title? Trish … you’re crazy.

~ Another big pop from the crowd.

Trish Stratus: What are … what are you talking about? Mickie ran you out of the WWE! Don’t you get it? She ran you out of here!

Ashley Massaro: You’re right, Trish. Mickie did run me out of here. But she’s also the one who brought me back.

~ A small pop from the crowd.

Ashley Massaro: You remember that surprise Mickie promised you last week right before I came down to the ring to check on her? That surprise … was me. Surprise!

~ Another small pop.

Ashley Massaro: Just like she told you she did to Rebecca, Mickie James sought me out, she found me, and she begged me to help her become closer to you. She’s not stupid, Mickie. She knows she has issues. And that’s why she came to me for help.

~ Ashley pauses slightly.

Ashley Massaro: Last week … last week was meant to be me coming out and explaining Mickie’s side of the story for her to you, so you could understand what she’s been through. And tonight, I came here to San Antonio to do the same thing.

~ Small pop from the crowd.

Ashley Massaro: But y’know what? There’s no point to that now, because Mickie James isn’t the one with the problems. You are!

~ Another pop.

Ashley Massaro: Trish, I hate to break it to you, but not everything is about you. Maybe if you realised that and cared about Mickie instead of just caring about yourself, you wouldn’t have this match with her at WrestleMania.

~ Trish is beginning to grit her teeth as Ashley looks to continue.

Ashley Massaro: But to be honest, I’m kind of glad you have that match at WrestleMania. Because after seeing what you’ve become, I can’t wait to see you lose your title to Mickie James.

~ A great pop from the crowd.

Ashley Massaro: Maybe then you’ll realise that not everything is about you.

~ Another pop from the crowd as Trish continues to seethe away to herself … BEFORE SUDDENLY SLAMMING THE MICROPHONE INTO ASHLEY’S HEAD! IT’S SATURDAY NIGHT’S MAIN EVENT ALL OVER AGAIN!

The crowd boos as Ashley takes the role that Mickie’s had for the past few weeks … but before Trish can do anymore damage the crowd erupts into a cheer … AND MICKIE JAMES HERSELF COMES RUSHING DOWN THE RAMP!

Panicking, the Women’s Champion quickly rolls away out of the ring, and looks on … at an ENRAGED LOOKING MICKIE JAMES! Gone is the sweet and innocent Mickie … MICKIE IS MAD!

Trish can’t believe it, backing up the ramp to safety as the crowd breaks out into a “Mickie! Mickie! Mickie!” chant.

Joey Styles: Thank God for Mickie James! She just saved Ashley from a horrific beatdown!

Jerry Lawler: But look at the look in her eyes! Mickie’s innocence … Mickie’s innocence has been killed!

Jonathan Coachman: Forget Mickie’s innocence. She looks like she’s going to kill Trish if she gets her hands on her!

Joey Styles: Mickie James looks like she’s finally learnt to stand up for herself, and not a moment too soon. With WrestleMania just three weeks away, what does this mean for the Women’s Title match?

We continue to look on at Mickie breathing in and out heavily, the crowd chanting her name in unison as we head off to a break.

*Commercial Break*

We return from the break back at ringside with our announce crew.

Joey Styles: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Monday Night RAW, where our tag team main event of John Cena and Rob Van Dam taking on Shawn Michaels and Kurt Angle is not far away. However, before then we want to once again show you what happened before the break when Ashley confronted Trish Stratus in the ring, following Trish interrupting Mickie James’ psychiatrist.

We get a replay of what went down before the break. Read the above segment if you somehow missed it.

Joey Styles: Gentlemen, I don’t think I’ve ever seen that look in Mickie James’ eyes. ‘King’, I think you said it best when you said Mickie’s innocence is gone.

Jerry Lawler: There was a newfound fire in Mickie’s eyes that we just saw. We’re dealing with a brand new Mickie James right here, and that may be the Mickie James that Trish Straus will have to deal with at WrestleMania.

Jonathan Coachman: Poor Trish. That fraud is gonna kill her!

We cut away from the announcers to go backstage, where we see The Spirit Squad, seemingly in their own private locker-room, bouncing around as they look on at a monitor which just went to black. They make all kinds of noise at first, but they all fall silent when Johnny Jeter speaks up.

Johnny Jeter: Hey guys, I’ve got an idea. How about we watch the finish to the match … AGAIN?

All: YEAH!

~ Kenny, who has the remote, presses play again so we can see The Squad hit the High Spirits, before Kenny himself hits the Sky High Leg Drop, causing The Spirit Squad to go into an absolute frenzy … when suddenly the TV is turned off … and we see The Redneck Wrecking Crew enter the scene.

Lance Cade: Gentlemen, I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Lance Cade, and this … this is my partner, Trevor Murdoch.

~ Murdoch grunts at The Squad, who have suddenly bunched back away from The Crew.

Lance Cade: This is quite an impressive locker-room you’ve got yourself here, boys.

~ Murdoch looks around, looking far less impressed than Cade.

Lance Cade: Courtesy of Mr. Eric Bischoff, am I right?

~ Cade smirks away.

Lance Cade: Speakin’ of impressive … your performance earlier … now that was impressive too.

~ Cade smiles, but as Kenny goes to talk he turns back serious, cutting Kenny of before he can even begin.

Lance Cade: But if ya think that ‘cause y’all the new golden boys here on RAW, that you’re gonna get a shot at the tag titles before us … well boys, you’ve got another thing comin’. ‘Cause while you may be flashy and impressive like your locker-room here, Murdoch an’ myself, we’re like our locker-room too … the communal locker-room. We may be rough around the edges and not as flashy and (Cade grabs at Kenny’s uniform) stylish as you guys …

~ Cade once again goes serious, leaning in towards The Spirit Squad.

Lance Cade: But you get in our way of the tag team titles, and we’ll make you roadkill.

~ Cade dips his cowboy hat, then takes a step back with Murdoch by his side.

Lance Cade: We’ll see you later, boys.

~ Cade & Murdoch now exit the locker-room, leaving The Squad dead quiet.

We now cut back to ringside to see Rene Dupree standing by in the ring just like last week, his music playing in the background and a microphone in his hand.

Rene Dupree: Excusez-moi.

~ Heat from the crowd for the foreign language.

Rene Dupree: Ladies and gentlemen, for your … viewing pleasure, I, Rene Dupree, am here to once again teach you a lesson in style and class.

~ Small heat from the crowd.

Rene Dupree: Last week … last week, we saw the very worst that you disgusting Americans had to offer, and I took care of it in a matter of minutes. So I ask you, to any American in the back, come out here and do your best to fight for your country. Prove that you filthy American pigs can tangle with the technical prowess that only a Frenchman … can offer.

Dupree smiles and drops the mic, then waits for a moment, until …


Dupree look immensely disappointed as, in the second time in two weeks, Eugene comes wandering out onto the stage to accept his challenge. The mentally handicapped nephew of Eric Bischoff makes his way down the ramp rather quickly, waving out at all the fans in the arena as he does so.

Joey Styles: Rene Dupree looks far from happy, as for the second straight week his open challenge has been met by Eugene.

Jonathan Coachman: Would you be happy, Joe? Rene Dupree is out here trying to prove himself as a serious competitor, and for the past two weeks that JOKE has come out.

Joey Styles: Well I understand why Rene isn’t happy, but I wouldn’t call Eugene a joke.

Eugene climbs up into the ring, and after waving out to the fans some more, prepares for battle.

Match Four ~ Singles Match:
Rene Dupree vs. Eugene

Much like last week, this is just another squash to show off the abilities of the underrated Rene Dupree. Dupree runs through Eugene likes he’s nothing, reeling off all of the moves in his moveset, before finishing things with the Dupree Driver for the three.

Winner: Rene Dupree via pinfall @ 1:42


Lilian Garcia: Here is your winner, Rene Dupree!

Dupree gets back to his feet to have his hand raised by the referee in victory. Despite it just being a win over Eugene, Dupree looks to further celebrate his victory, doing the French Tickler of his on the spot.

Joey Styles: Rene Dupree impressive again, and it looks like he’s content with having beaten Eugene.

Jonathan Coachman: Eugene will do for now, but mark my words, sometime in the future Rene Dupree is gonna have a big impact.

Jerry Lawler: I just hope when he has that impact that he’s not doing that little dance. He looks ridiculous!

After the in-depth thoughts from ‘King’, we cut away from Dupree …

… And we’re now backstage to see Shawn Michaels sitting on a bench, lacing his boots. His hometown crowd goes ABSOLUTELY WILD with a huge mixed reaction as the stoic Michaels goes about his business … when Kurt Angle suddenly enters the shot, and the two former rivals go face to face to a huge reaction!

Kurt Angle: Shawn … you don’t like me … and I sure as HELL don’t like you.

~ Big mixed reaction from the crowd.

Kurt Angle: But if me and you … if we wanna win tonight … we’re gonna have to work together … you got it?

~ Michaels smirks, his arrogance shining through.

Shawn Michaels: Kurt, I don’t give a damn if we work together. You just make sure that you leave Van Dam … to me.

Michaels sneers, then sits back down, looking on as Kurt backs away and we head off to a break.

*Commercial Break*





We return to ringside to see our commentators sitting by as “I Dare You” by Shinedown plays in the background.

Joey Styles: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Monday Night RAW. As you can hear in the background, that is indeed our theme for WrestleMania 22, “I Dare You” by Shinedown who we’d like to thank, and gentlemen, we are just twenty days away from the biggest show of the year.

Jerry Lawler: WrestleMania fever has well and truly hit, Joe. This is the one time of the year where almost everyone is in a good mood.

Jonathan Coachman: And why wouldn’t they be? WrestleMania’s where all the stars come out babyboy, especially this year when ‘The Coach’ makes his WrestleMania debut on commentary.

Joey Styles: As monumental of an event as that’ll be, ‘Coach’, we also have a heck of a card stacked up for WrestleMania, perhaps none bigger than Rob Van Dam challenging The Undertaker in an attempt become known as the guy who ended The Undertaker’s streak at WrestleMania.

Jerry Lawler: This promises to be a heck of a match, Joey. A couple of weeks ago I wouldn’t have even given Van Dam the slightest of chances, but these past few weeks he has impressed me. It would be an upset, but I think he can do it!

Jonathan Coachman: Joe, I don’t know why you’re even bothering to announce this match. Once Shawn Michaels gets done with RVD in tonight’s tag match, this match isn’t gonna happen at WrestleMania. And to that, I say good riddance, because I am NOT being embarrassed by Van Dam on the grandest stage of ‘em all.

Joey Styles: Speaking of being embarrassed, the United States Champion Booker T was again embarrassed on Friday Night SmackDown! this past week when Teddy Long announced that he would have to defend his United States Title against Chris Benoit one more time. That, however, isn’t all, because if Orlando Jordan can beat Benoit this week on SmackDown!, he’ll be included in the match, making it a Three Way Dance.

Jonathan Coachman: Teddy Long is a racist. Why’s he gotta hate on my fellow playa Booker T like this? Booker already beat Chris Benoit. What more can he do?

Jerry Lawler: ‘Coach’, Teddy Long IS black, but I agree that this will be rough on Booker. Can he come out victorious? I dunno, although a lot may change if Orlando Jordan beats Chris Benoit this week on SmackDown!.

Joey Styles: The Women’s Championship will be on the line as Trish Stratus defends against Mickie James. Trish Stratus thought that she had already broken Mickie, but Mickie has come out with new fire here tonight. Can Trish possibly retain after seeing that?

Jonathan Coachman: Trish is the best women’s wrestler the world has ever seen, so yeah, she can do it. She’s just gotta make sure that Mickie James doesn’t kill her.

Jerry Lawler: That’s easier said than done, though ‘Coach’. You saw the look in Mickie’s eyes earlier.

Joey Styles: The World Tag Team Titles will be on the line when Kane and the Big Show defend against Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin. Benjamin has been looking to back out of this match, but earlier tonight you saw Charlie Haas finally stand up to him. Can these two get on the same page before WrestleMania and show why they were once called The World’s Greatest Tag Team?

Jonathan Coachman: I’m sure they could if they wanted to, but after Haas treated Shelton like that earlier tonight? Yeah, good luck getting’ on the same page now.

Jerry Lawler: They were never on the same page to begin with, but at least Charlie has had a say now. Just how close they can come at WrestleMania might be shown by how well Charlie fares against the Big Show next week.

Joey Styles: The WWE Tag Team Titles will be defend by MNM as they face the returning Hardy Boyz. Matt and Jeff proved they’ve still got the chemistry this past week on SmackDown!, but MNM will be out to prove that they’re the greatest tag team of all-time and not The Hardy Boyz at WrestleMania.

Jonathan Coachman: MNM all the way in this one baby. Comin’ off a big win over the World Heavyweight Champ Batista and Randy Orton, there ain’t nothin’ that can stop the MNM train.

Jerry Lawler: Well I had the pleasure of watching The Hardy Boyz develop from youngsters into what they are today, and after seeing that I can’t help but feel that WrestleMania will be their night.

Joey Styles: In perhaps the most personal match on the card, it’ll be Shawn Michaels taking on his one time best friend Triple H, and it will be No Holds Barred!

Jerry Lawler: Well Triple H was removed from the arena by Eric Bischoff earlier tonight due to not being medically cleared, but the same thing won’t be happening at WrestleMania. Triple H will be out for revenge, and I feel he’ll get it.

Jonathan Coachman: This match is all about Shawn Michaels and his chance to take out Triple H on his way top gettin’ his smile back. Ironically, he’s gonna have to do it by beating the happiness out of another man for good, but I think Shawn can do it.

Joey Styles: Eight men, a ringside full of ladders and pain guaranteed. For the man who climbs up a ladder and unhooks the briefcase suspended twenty feet in the air is a contract that guarantees them a world title match, any time any place over the next twelve months. Who will walk out of WrestleMania as ‘Mr. Money in the Bank’?

Jonathan Coachman: My pick all along has been Gregory Helms, and I’m stickin’ with him. He may have fallen short of winnin’ the Intercontinental Title earlier tonight thanks to Ric Flair’s cheating, but trust me, he’s gonna walk out of WrestleMania as ‘Mr. Money in the Bank’.

Jerry Lawler: As much as I’d like Ric Flair to win, this will be his first ladder match ever. I do think, however, that his close friend Chavo Guerrero is huge opportunity, having found new life here on RAW, plus ladder match experience.

Joey Styles: Those men are vying for a shot at a world title, but what about the World Heavyweight Title match itself? The World Heavyweight Champion Batista defends his title against his former team-mate and 2006 Royal Rumble winner Randy Orton.

Jonathan Coachman: Randy Orton’s on the climb once more, while Big Dave is on a decline. With WrestleMania looming fast, I can’t see any other way for this to go than an Orton victory.

Jerry Lawler: It’s gonna be tough for Batista, there’s no doubting that. He may have lost his past three matches, but Batista has been World Heavyweight Champion for a year now, and I think he may just come good when the time is right.

Joey Styles: And finally the main event from Monday Night RAW. The WWE Champion Edge defends against the two men he’s been running from for months. It’s Edge vs. Cena vs. Angle for the WWE Title at WrestleMania.

Jerry Lawler: And Edge can’t run over the next two weeks, because in the lead-up to WrestleMania he’ll be facing BOTH Kurt Angle and John Cena in one on one matches! Life isn’t going to be easy on the champ before WrestleMania.

Jonathan Coachman: Contrary to what you may believe, Edge hasn’t run from anyone, and he’s not gonna start doin’ it now. Trust me, my boy is gonna walk into WrestleMania as champ and he’s gonna walk out just the same. The ones who should be worried about the next few weeks are Cena and Angle, ‘cause they mightn’t make it the WrestleMania if they piss off the champ.

Joey Styles: That’s WrestleMania and that is in twenty days, folks, but the night before WrestleMania in 19 days we will see the Class of 2006 inducted into the Hall of Fame. Announced thus far are the late great Eddie Guerrero, Jim Ross and Verne Gagne. Who will be the latest man to be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame?




We return from that in the backstage area … or more specifically, in the trainer’s room, where Rob Van Dam sits on a table. The crowd gives a huge pop as RVD stretches his freshly taped knee out, the doctor packing up beside him.

Rob Van Dam: Hey, thanks again doc.

~ The doctor nods at Van Dam and leaves the view … to be replaced by John Cena, drawing a MASSIVE mixed reaction out of the crowd, mostly comprising cheers.

Rob Van Dam: Hey, it’s ‘The Champ’. What’s up dude?

John Cena: Sup with me? Dude, I’m not the one who just went through a match only to have to compete again. Sup with you? You ready for our tag team match?

~ RVD smiles and stretches his knee out for Cena to see.

Rob Van Dam: You know it.

~ Cena can’t help but crack a smile.

John Cena: That’s good to hear man. I’ll see you out there.

~ Cena turns to leave, only for Van Dam to grab him by the shoulder.

Rob Van Dam: By the way, John … if Shawn Michaels wants a piece of me? Let him try.

~ Another smile from Cena.

John Cena: Alright, you got it. I’ll see ya out there man.

And with that Cena walks off as Van Dam looks on into the distance while we head off to a break with a caption down the bottom of the screen telling us the main event is next.

*Commercial Break*

We return from the break and immediately hear …


And the crowd goes ABSOLUTELY OFF THEIR HEADS as out from the back comes the hometown hero Shawn Michaels to an amazingly mixed reaction, with the cheers perhaps just taking the cake. Like a man on a mission, Shawn isn’t particularly exuberant, instead walking down to the ring with a focussed expression on his face.

Lilian Garcia: The following contest is a tag team match, and it is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from San Antonio, Texas, ‘THE HEARTBREAK KID’ SHAAWWWNNNN MICHAELS!

Joey Styles: Last week this man Shawn Michaels officially began his quest to regain his smile, starting by taking out Triple H, and ending, as he says, when he finally regains the WWE Title. Tonight Shawn will be looking to take out RVD to get in the General Manager’s good books, but even if this is but a sideshow for Michaels, he still looks to be a man on a mission.

Jerry Lawler: Oh, no doubt about it, Joe. Shawn is all focus towards his goal. The only problem is that with that focus has come a deep dark side we never knew existed, at least not anymore.

Jonathan Coachman: Problem? ‘King’, this is a blessing. Shawn Michaels knows what he wants, and he’s willing to go out and get it. Don’t be mad ‘cause you’re not as strong minded as Shawn Michaels.

Michaels climbs up into the ring and again doesn’t pose, instead just readying himself as we wait.


And the crowd gives a MASSIVE pop as Kurt Angle stomps his way out onto the stage. Cutting his ever intense figure, Kurt marches halfway down the ramp, then throws his arms up into the air, triggering pyro to fly out wildly behind him.

Lilian Garcia: His partner, from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, weighing 225 lbs, KUUURRRTTT AAANNNNGGGLLLLEEEE!

Joey Styles: Tonight Kurt Angle gets his chance to finally beat John Cena, but coming in the next two weeks before WrestleMania, Kurt will get his chance to get his hands on Edge. With that in mind, will Kurt be entirely focussed on tonight?

Jonathan Coachman: As much as I hate to say it, yes, he will be. Kurt’s a focussed guy, and he knows what he’s goin’ for. He has his tunnel vision, and tonight that vision is on John Cena.

Jerry Lawler: Exactly. When you get something in Kurt Angle’s mind, he will only focus on that thing. He may be focussing on Edge next, but for now his worry is John Cena, along with RVD.

Angle climbs up into the ring to join his partner, but he doesn’t acknowledge him, instead just taking up a place beside him.


For the second time tonight, the same tune blasts out, but the reaction is just as loud as Rob Van Dam walks out onto the stage. Despite looking a little proppy on his knee, RVD remains calm, walking down the ramp with a relaxed expression on his face.

Lilian Garcia: Their opponents, first, from Battle Creek, Michigan, weighing 235 lbs, ROB – VAN – DAM!

Joey Styles: RVD is out here for a second time tonight following his earlier match with Edge in which his previous knee was already tested. Will this have an effect on this match here?

Jerry Lawler: Oh, no doubt, Joey, especially since it’s been awhile since RVD wrestled. The adrenaline would’ve cut out about ten minutes after his first match, and now all he’s going to be feeling is the pain in that knee.

Jonathan Coachman: And that is exactly what Shawn Michaels is going to take advantage of. You give that man that slightest advantage, and he’ll take it for all it’s worth and then some. That’s how good Shawn Michaels is.

Rather than climbing into the dangerous territory of the ring, Van Dam waits at the foot of the ramp for his partner …


The crowd gives a GIANT response for the former WWE Champion John Cena, who charges out onto the stage, full of energy. Cena clearly doesn’t want to waste any time, running down the ramp to join Van Dam, then sliding into the ring … AND THIS ONE IS UNDERWAY!

Match Five ~ Tag Team Match:
Shawn Michaels & Kurt Angle vs. Rob Van Dam & John Cena

This match kicks off with a bang as the teams pair off – RVD and Michaels go at it in one corner and Cena and Angle in another. The two sets of two trade shots, slugging it out much to the enjoyment of the crowd, who cheer rabidly. It takes awhile, but eventually Michaels and Angle get the advantage, Angle thanks to a knee lift to the midsection and Michaels thanks to a boot to the knee of Van Dam. The two then hammer their foes into the corner, before backing away and charging in … both being struck with elbows to the jaw! Angle and Michaels stagger back … then get their heads taken off with a pair of clotheslines!

RVD is quick to capitalise on this, pitching Shawn through the ropes, before following him up and hammering away on him on the outside … leading to him getting him up for a suplex and dropping him on the crowd barrier! The crowd cheers as RVD climbs up to the apron for the second time of the nigh and does his classic thumb taunt … then this time connects with the spinning leg drop! In the ring Cena is controlling Angle, kicking away at him in the corner until Angle attempts to stumble out. Cena, though, is all over him, grabbing him and sending him off with an Irish whip, before scoring with a reverse elbow on the rebound! Cena makes the cover … two!

Cena continues his offensive advantage for the next few moments, working together well with RVD, who makes his way up onto the apron to work over Kurt Angle, all while Shawn Michaels continues to struggle on the outside. Shawn’s positioning eventually pays off though, as when RVD runs off to the ropes he is able to grab Van Dam by the leg, distracting him, allowing Angle to swoop in with a chop block! Angle then looks to follow up, going right after the leg of Van Dam, but RVD manages to kick him away and tag in John Cena, while Angle tags in Shawn Michaels.

These two men have a brief stare down, the crowd in San Antonio going crazy as they do so … before they go right at it and slug it out in the middle of the ring, Michaels with chops and Cena with straight up right hands! Eventually Cena is the one to get the advantage to the displeasure of the San Antonio crowd, sending Michaels off with an Irish whip, only for Michaels to slide through his legs on the return, then poke him in the eye. The crowd goes wild as Cena staggers back, but Michaels soon turns them against him, telling them in no uncertain terms to fuck off.

Michaels now turns his attention to the reeling Cena, grabbing him by the head and looking to ram him down face first into the corner, only for Cena to reverse by reaching his foot out, then slamming Michaels’ head down instead! The crowd cheers as Michaels falls back, with Cena quick to follow, grabbing a front face lock and dragging ‘HBK’ across to the corner to tag in RVD! The crowd gives a nice pop as RVD comes back into things, combining with Cena for a little teamwork as the duo hook up with a double hip toss that gets a two.

RVD is quick to follow up, lifting Michaels up to his feet then whipping him into the corner so he can follow him in, only for Michaels to get his boot up. RVD staggers away in pain, prompting Shawn to charge in at him … right into a back body drop! RVD is suddenly fired up, calling Kurt Angle into the ring too, which Kurt happily complies with, wanting to get an attack in on Van Dam … but he runs right into a spin kick! Angle goes down … but then so does RVD, taken from behind with a chop block by Michaels!

From here on out RVD is in major trouble, taking a sustained beating at the hands of Angle & Michaels, although Michaels is the one to do nearly all of the work, wanting to please Eric Bischoff. Like earlier with Edge though, Van Dam proves to be persistent, and in spite of Michaels’ best efforts, continues to battle on. He even starts to fight back following Michaels driving his elbow down into his knee, kicking Shawn in the head a few times to stagger him up, before getting back up and going for a kick to the midsection … but Shawn catches him and nails the dragon screw! RVD is down … and Shawn takes advantage, locking in the figure four leglock!

The crowd goes wild with a mixed reaction as RVD writhes in pain, clearly under a lot of pressure from the hold. Shawn shows no remorse, leaning back as far as possible to try to put as much pressure on as he can, forcing RVD to try to rush to the ropes as soon as possible. That’s easier said than done though, and RVD is forced to struggle, desperately trying to pull his body towards the ropes, having to drag Michaels along with the ride while he’s at it, making it damn near impossible …


The hometown boy looks extremely frustrated, bickering with the referee … before deciding to bring RVD back into the middle of the ring and go figure four again … no, RVD kicks him off … then rolls him up on the rebound … two! The crowd cheers as both men get to their feet and run off to the ropes … before nailing one another with a clothesline! Both men are down. With both Cena and Angle looking for a tag, the crowd claps on in encouragement as both RVD and Michaels struggle closer and closer … and they make the tags!

The crowd goes wild as Cena and Angle run into the ring … Cena clothesline! Cena hits a second clothesline, then a third, before pushing Angle back into the ropes and getting him on the rebound with a sit out hip toss! A disorientated Angle spins back to his feet … AND GETS CAUGHT WITH THE PROTOPLEX! The crowd goes nuts as Cena springs up and tells Angle “You can’t see me!” on his way off to the ropes … BEFORE COMING BACK WITH THE FIVE KNUCKLE SHUFFLE! Angle is on dream street, getting back up to his feet … RIGHT INTO F-U POSITION … BUT HE SLIPS OUT … GERMAN SUPLEX … AND THE HANDS ARE CLASPED! The crowd goes nuts as Angle goes for the second, nailing it … BEFORE THE THIRD … NO, CENA FIGHTS OUT OF IT WITH ELBOWS … THEN COMES BACK WITH THE OVERCASTLE, SMASHING ANGLE’S FACE INTO THE MAT!

The crowd cheers as Cena gets back up … BAM! SHAWN MICHAELS DRILLS HIM WITH SWEET CHIN MUSIC OUT OF NOWHERE! Rob Van Dam now rolls back into the ring … AND GETS SOME SWEET CHIN MUSIC TOO … WAIT, NO, HE DUCKS … THEN HITS MICHAELS WITH A SUPERKICK OF HIS OWN! Michaels goes down, though this clearly takes a lot out of Van Dam too, who nurses his knee tenderly … AND ANGLE COMES FROM BEHIND … ANGLE SLAM! ANGLE NAILS IT!


The crowd goes wild as both men remain down on the mat, slowly starting to get to their feet just as the crowd begins to boo for some reason … AND AS ANGLE TURNS AROUND HE GETS SPEARED OUT OF HIS BOOTS … BY EDGE! THE CHAMP STRIKES ON ANGLE … THEN ON CENA TOO! BOTH MEN ARE DOWN!

Winner: No Contest @ 12:49

No announcement comes, as the WWE Champion instead just stands over his two fallen foes, a manic look in his eyes.

Joey Styles: Oh my God! Edge has come out here, and just like at Saturday Night’s Main Event, he has ruined this match!

Jonathan Coachman: He hasn’t ruined anything, Joe. The fun is just beginning!

The crowd doesn’t share Coachman’s sentiments though, booing as Edge smiles, picking up the WWE Title from the mat and going to raise it in the air …


Jerry Lawler: Maybe the fun is only just beginning.

Jonathan Coachman: No Van Dam! Don’t do it!

The crowd continues to cheer as Van Dam now heads to the corner, then goes up to the top rope … AND COMES FLYING DOWN … FIVE STAR FROG SPLASH! RVD CONNECTS WITH THE FIVE STAR FROG SPLASH!

Joey Styles: Five Star Frog Splash! Edge may have escaped it earlier by walking out on his match with RVD, but he couldn’t run forever!

RVD gets to his feet, clearly winded following the move, but the crowd continues to cheer … WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN SHAWN MICHAELS SLIDES IN THE RING BEHIND RVD WITH A STEEL CHAIR!

Joey Styles: Michaels has a chair! Turn around RVD!

Jonathan Coachman: Hit him Shawn!


Joey Styles: Van Daminator! RVD just nailed Shawn Michaels with the Van Daminator!

Jonathan Coachman: This is horrible!

RVD looks around, noticing he’s the last man standing in the ring with everyone left laid out around him on the floor, and a sigh of relief finally comes from Van Dam.


The crowd continues to cheer as RVD heads for the corner, going to the second rope to acknowledge the fans.

Joey Styles: What a way to end Monday Night RAW! RVD comes out, against all odds, standing tall here, having once again overcome Eric Bischoff! We are just three weeks away from WrestleMania, and could this be the scene at WrestleMania too? We’ll see in three weeks time! Good night everybody!

We now begin to fade away, all of the way to …


AGAIN! The crowd erupts with a huge pop as the arena falls dark …


The lights come back on … AND THE UNDERTAKER IS IN THE RING … GRASPING RVD BY THE THROAT! The crowd erupts as The Undertaker lifts Van Dam up … THEN PLANTS HIM WITH THE CHOKESLAM!

Van Dam is down, the only man now being left in the ring The Undertaker, as he drops down to his knee for his signature pose, allowing us to once again fade away to black.



April 2nd, 2006 | Allstate Arena; Rosemont, Illinois

World Heavyweight Championship:
Randy Orton vs. Batista ©

WWE Championship; Triple Threat Match:
John Cena vs. Kurt Angle vs. Edge ©

Interbrand Match:
Rob Van Dam vs. The Undertaker

No Holds Barred Match:
Triple H vs. Shawn Michaels

United States Championship:
Chris Benoit vs. Booker T ©

World Tag Team Championships:
Charlie Haas & Shelton Benjamin vs. Kane & Big Show ©

WWE Tag Team Championships:
The Hardy Boyz vs. MNM ©

Women’s Championship:
Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus ©

Money in the Bank Ladder Match:
Gregory Helms vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito vs. Paul London vs. Ric Flair vs. Finlay vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. ???

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