Join Date: Mar 2006
Re: Legend Presents: World Wrestling Entertainment
Opening Promo - "When’re" is awkward. When are is better imo. The whole part that started with "When're" was really off, and didn't flow to me. He seems to be portrayed as pissed off, but it's not coming out right. I think it's the wording tbh. Not liking the flow of this so far. Don't know why. :S I didn't like the transition from being the best to going to talking about ECW. That was just weird. The "I was the TEN..." line seems awkward to me. I think it's the way that you're portraying Triple H that makes me dislike what he's saying. I think you're trying too hard to make him sound cocky, confident, and tough at the same time. I don't know, but that's what I'm getting. Bischoff now. Haha. I'm loving Bischoff. His explanation sounds great. The 9th/11th comment from Bischoff & Trips was unnecessary imo. I'm loving Bischoff though. He sounds intelligent, and a heel at the same time. I don't think Triple H would stop saying what he was saying because of the fans especially when it's a signature saying. McMahon shows his authority. Everything goes back to normal, and Bischoff, and Trips don't even get a word. That's not usual, but whatever. I loved Bischoff's part of the promo, but I think you still need some work with Triple H especially his character, and flow. Other than that, a nice lengthy promo.
Helms vs. Eugene - Why is this no dq? :S The consequences of not reading prior Raws. Definitely wouldn't expect a gimmick match to start the show though. Some moments where I thought the match should have been over, but the ending wasn't that bad either. I guess you had to make this no dq match look good. Glad to see Helms win. Good stuff.
Carlito/Edge Promo - I love how you write Carlito. Edge is good. "our FRAUDS!"? I think you mean "are FRAUDS!" :S "you’re that guys like Kurt Angle"...talk about confusing. Second time tonight you used "GUARAN – DAMN – TEE". Dat, dat's not cool. Great promo. Edge was great towards the middle, and the end, and Carlito added on with little comments that helped the promo altogether. I just think the end could have flowed a little better.
WGTT/SS Promo - Haas & Shelton are both pretty generic, which is right, I guess, for their characters. A little bit of hate between the two. Foreshadowing of things to come? Kenny comes, and pwns them basically. I like it. WGTT could either reform to beat SS or they could still have some hate, and go into Haas vs. Shelton. Things look good.
Vic vs. Mick - "one that doesn’t take too much away from the prospect of a future bigger feud". That right there sir = high ratings. I love that you said that because it's true, and it happens all the time. Great booking there. Don't really know what's happening in the women's division between Mick/Vic/Ash/Trish, but it sounds intriguing.
Bischoff/Cena Promo - Once again, another phenomenal promo. Cena, and Bischoff were both portrayed well with Bischoof looking like a little bitch, and Cena being well, being Cena. The catchphrase ending was priceless. Your promo writing is better than I remember tbh.
6 Man Tag Match - "cover up any of Chris Masters’ flaws" = lmao. Seemed like the focus was on Haas/Shelton, and Chavo/Masters, which foreshadows those feuds to me. Once again, another great match writeup.
Ash/Trish/Mick Promo - Hmmm. If I'm thinking what this feud is about, it could end up so great, but I won't release my thoughts just yet. The women's division could actually be having a great storyline. Gotta read more to find out though, right? :P
JBL Inc Video Package - Not bad. I don't actually think Flair is that injured because I see JBL/Flair for WM, but I've been really wrong with guesses before in BTB so I don't know. Good promo. Short, but good. JBL was in character, and flowed nicely.
Big Show Promo - Squash. Kane with a steel chain? No physical conflict here, but I'm thinking that these two will end their feud at WM in a gimmick match of sorts. Looks good.
Kurt Angle - I was anxiously awaiting for the WWE Champion to cut a promo tbh. The word "best" has been used so many times this show. Just to let you know. Catchphrase ending again. Not bad. Kurt Angle was entertaining throughout the whole promo, which is amazing considering promos are usually good to me, but don't entertain that much. Character, flow, and wording are all awesome. Good stuff.
Main Event - Sounded like an amazing main event. HBK's music to distract Cena seemed like the best booking option to continue Cena/HBK. The heels get the surprising win, so I'm thinking it's not over between these two teams, but who knows. I like the booking all around though.
Overall - Your actually a better promo writer than I remembered, but yeah, phenomenal promos. Only one that I had a dislike for was the opening promo with Triple H. That one I didn't like at all. Match writeups are great, and nicely detailed. Good work on those. Your booking is phenomenal too. Great decisions in things you do, and great explanations. You're a top booker here in WF. Keep it up.