Finally Out of Cutey Sleep
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: The Fountain of Dreams
Re: Presenting AOW: Art of War Wrestling - The Greatest Affair
Lots of big news to get going all at once…
Spoiler for Latest string of insider news:
Originally Posted by The Informer
~With AOW’s offseason set in stone, the exact amount of time the Offseason actually occurs is what’s being tampered with. As noted on the AOW website earlier today, the date for the end of the Offseason has changed from mid-June to the beginning of June, AOW looking to get back on television starting from June 4th, making the Offseason last between The Outer Limits, March 16th to that June 4th. This cuts it all the way down to only being just over two months long, lasting only part of March and all of April and May. This is made possible by relations with FX getting somewhat better in the last week or so.
~The reason for the shortening of the Offseason is because officials have stated something big will happen in the month of June, so much so, that they need the whole month to go through with it. Whatever this monumental mystery may be, it will most likely involve some kind of build for the recently announced one-year anniversary Pay-Per-View, Origins and Endings.
~The actual arena that will host Origins and Endings actually has yet to be determined, as the two top places slated, the HSBC Arena in Buffalo and the Times Union Center in Albany (both staying in New York), are both looking at how AOW handles its next two big PPVs, This is Exile and The Outer Limits.
~As we noted before, AOW is trying to get as many people on-screen at least once before the Offseason comes up to get them a good pay before the two month hiatus. The recent planned cruiserweight four-way matches and the upcoming Trios Tournament are most likely prevalent examples of this.
~Speaking of ‘hiatus’, the suspension of Muhammad Hassan has nothing to do with any kind of violation of company policies. The suspension is merely a way for Hassan, real name Mark Copani, to take time away for personal reasons, but many in the company see it, as well as the Offseason, to be used by Hassan to evaluate whether he wants to remain with the company. If many recall, Copani had to be coaxed out of retirement after proclaiming many times he did not want to return to wrestling.
~Also as seen on the previous edition of Oblivion, a video package that read “The Saint is Coming” aired, which may sources believe to be the confirmation of the upcoming debut for whomever may be the man AOW snatched from the WWE roster under a new gimmick. Expect this to be the final new character until after the Offseason, with several being introduced in the last several weeks as it is (Kingston, Black, Colon, potentially William Regal).
~Also in roster news, AOW continues to look interested in expanding into a women’s division in coming years. They’ve taken note of many female talents that I’ve mentioned before, many of them getting contract talks. On that note, AOW has signed another OVW talent, British-born Steve Lewington.
~Until next time, this has been The Informer…
Originally Posted by aohdubya.com
ROB VAN DAM ROBERT SZATOWSKI TO BE IN ATTENDANCE AT THIS IS EXILE
The man many of us know as the “Whole F’n Show” who has since somewhat declared himself “The Artist Formerly Known as Rob Van Dam” Robert Szatowski has been revealed to be a ticket holder at AOW’s next PPV extravaganza, This is Exile, coming to you from the Izod Center in East Rutherford, New Jersey. When reached for comment, Mr. Szatowski said he merely ‘wants to enjoy the show with my wife’.
Has Mr. Wednesday Night truly died? Or is he here for much bigger purposes? Time can only tell, but for those of you still wanting to get tickets to sit up next to the Szatowskis, seats are still available!
MUHAMMAD HASSAN SUSPENDED
In our latest aohdubya.com Exclusives, Muhammad Hassan went ballistic and assaulted rookie Matt Sydal after being denied his evident rematch against CM Punk for the Dynasty Championship. Acting Commander in Chief Mick Foley released today that he has suspended Hassan for his actions for an undetermined amount of time.
OFFSEASON UPDATE/ WE INVITE YOU TO OUR ONE-YEAR BASH
We here at Art of War Wrestling are proud to announce that AOW’s fourth Pay-Per-View spectacular, Origins and Endings, has been confirmed to take place on August 19th, 2008. What’s so special about this huge event? Origins and Endings is going to be our ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY PROGRAM! Thank you fans for supporting us this much and giving us enough support to be guaranteed for a full calendar year! Tickets for the event will go on sale after The Outer Limits.
But since we can’t wait until that day, we’ve decided to give you and ourselves an early birthday present by shortening the AOW Offseason by a few weeks! The AOW Offseason will now officially begin March 17th and ending on June the 4th, Oblivion going back on the air same time, same place! Stay tuned for more AOW Offseason news as it develops.
This week on the .com Exclusives, The Mexicools have now had enough, the World’s Greatest Tag Team swallows their pride, and Muhammad Hassan completely loses his cool en route to suspension.
Spoiler for The World's Greatest Tag Team Clears Their Name:
We’re brought to the image of Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas against a white backdrop, neither man looking very happy, but very disappointed. Haas has his head down, while Benjamin has his lips folded in. Both men are holding their AOW Tag Team Championships over their shoulders.
Y’know, what we’re about to say makes us sound like real jerks. Like flip floppers. But it’s not us being shallow or hypocritical or anything. We’re just thinking things through.
~Benjamin rubs his chin for a moment
See, we’ve been in this position before. We got really overconfident. We opened our big mouths. We lost sight. And we paid for it.
The first time it happened, we got put in a four way ladder match. That almost turned out terrible.
And then last week, it almost cost us our titles again because we had no idea who we were gonna face.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – me and Charlie are competitors. We’re pure bred athletes. And sometimes, we get wrapped up in ourselves and say and do stupid things.
So…we both wanna kinda thank you, CM Punk. You were right. About everything. Benji and I realized just how right you were before we had to defend these things last week.
And we realized we had to just shut up and defend these things against whoever’s next in line. We lost our championship heart. I mean, hey – where’s the fun in holding a title you don’t remind people why you hold it?
~Benjamin looks towards Haas, who nods his head
So, with that said, Mick Foley, Charlie and I just wanted to apologize for our attitudes the last few weeks. And to the fans too. But we mostly wanna apologize to you, TJ Wilson.
~Haas again nods is head
We issued you a challenge, then backed out on it. That was disrespectful. And if I remember correctly, you still have to face me, don’t you?
~Benjamin smiles at the camera
We may be the World’s Greatest Tag Team, but we stand on the ground that it’s not just about the competition.
It’s about RESPECTING the competition. And then snuffing you out.
~Benjamin and Haas share in a cocky little laugh at that, their ‘bad’ attitudes not completely gone it might appear, but the two do seem genuine in their words before we fade out…
Spoiler for The Mexicools Know What's Really 'Cool':
~The Green Zone Interview set…
Mike “The Miz” Mizanin here, back to give you the best skinny on the hooey as only I can. And I use that oldies American phrase because I think I’m the only person here right now who can speak American. I present – the gardeners! I mean, The Mexicools!
~The camera pans back to see Super Crazy and Psicosis on both sides of The Miz, both of them staring daggers into him. This is quite uncharacteristic of the Mexicools, Miz taking notice…
What? Can’t speak English or don’t have a sense of humor?
~The two continue to stare a hole through Miz, who goes from stirring the pot to realizing the pot’s about to boil over...
Um…you two had a message you wanted to issue…sirs?
~Miz cautiously hands the microphone to Super Crazy before running off and leaving the two alone…before both Mexicools bust out laughing. The laughing subsides when Crazy looks back towards the camera
Ju’ see that, Carlito? That wasn’t a como se dice “stereotype”. That was the Mexicools bein’ the Mexicools, hombre
“Jur ass is grass and we are the lawnmowers.” Remember, vato?
~The Mexicools cackle once more, reminiscing to Carlito running scared from their prank a few weeks ago
But ju? Ju ran from us when we weren’t even THERE, homes! An’ that’s just Carlito being Carlito. Jou’re a coward.
Oh yeah. We said it. Are you going to sick your como se dice “insurance policy” on us?
~The pranksters chuckle once more, Crazy getting Psicosis to hit the rock on that one
Oh, yeah. Ju’re so much of a coward, ju don’t wanna deal with us jourself. We heard the Mercenaries were looking for us. We’re wanted men, vato.
~Crazy says the last line to Psicosis, who we can hear say “That’s how I like it, homes!”
But that’s the thing – Super Crazy and Psicosis are who ju want. So don’t bring Aero Star into this.
~Both Mexicool’s faces get very serious on this one
Ju can be mad at the Mexicools. But Aero Star is a good friend. We not goin’ to take what ju did to him lightly.
So ju want us, homes – come get us!
Send ju’re Mercenaries. We’ll take them down this Wednesday. And then…ju’re ass really is grass. An’ it’s goin’ to be ours.
~Crazy looks into the camera with a smirk, while Psicosis gets a big grin on his face, nodding his head, as we fade away…
Spoiler for Muhammad Hassan Completely Loses His Cool:
We’re brought to a scene in chaos already in progress, as Muhammad Hassan is throwing Matt Sydal around backstage, tossing him off anything and everything he can find in his rage-fueled path. He finds an equipment box and chunks Sydal against that, leaving the rookie to crumple in pain.
I WANT MY TITLE BACK!!
Hassan’s misplaced rage continues as he kicks Sydal square in the face while he’s crumpled on the floor. He then takes Sydal and forces him over…before slapping on the Camel Clutch! We can hear the vertebrae of Sydal just pop in the worst places, Hassan screaming in intensity, almost drowning out the innocent rookie’s cries of pain. Just when it looks like he may have maimed Sydal, out of nowhere comes a kick to the side of Hassan’s head…from Billy Kidman!! Hassan lets go of the hold, only to look up and see Kidman with more life in him than he’s had in years, kicking away viciously to defend his pupil. Hassan still has much life in him, however, pushing Kidman back, as he hits some equipment spine-first. He recoils back into the grip of Hassan, who flings him head over heels through some more equipment! Before Hassan can cause any more damage, a barrage of officials pull him back, others tending to the fallen mentor/student duo lying on the floor.
I WANT WHAT’S MINE, DAMMIT!! THIS IS UNJUST!
Hassan continues his shrieks of madness, his brutality overflowing, as he is carried away from the scene. We get a shot of Matt Sydal close up, looking vengefully at Hassan, while his mentor is struggling to get to his feet as we fade away…
The Hammerstein Ballroom – Manhattan, New York City, New York
“What Doesn’t Kill You...”
.:Confirmed for Oblivion:.
AOW Tag Team Champion Shelton Benjamin w/Charlie Haas v. TJ Wilson
The Mexicools v. The Mercenaries
The second 4-Way match in the Cruiserweight Championship #1 Contender Mini-Tournament
~Winner faces Gregory Helms~
Christian Cage leads off the night
Decided not to give a long-winded preview since this newswire already had lots for stuff to read on it, so just gave the preview the bare minimum. No idea when the show will be posted, but just wanted to get it up. I’m ridiculously behind on reviews at the moment, I know. I haven’t reviewed someone in ages, I think, but I’m going to keep trying to catch up with that once my schedule gets a little lighter. So don't hate me too much please