Just for fun, hopefully we can come up with a thousand things we have learnt from WWE over the years. Ill go first:
1) When Randy Orton was having visions in his head, us viewers were able to look through Ortons mind to see the hallucinations. Us viewers must have powers. (During Undertaker vs Orton storyline)
91: CM Punk knows you have a vagina!
92: If you did something, just remember, you did it for The Rock!
93: WWE can magicaly replace the "N" word with "Suckah" (Hulk Hogan, We Comin For You N.. Suckah!)
94. WWE tells us who to like and hate.
95. WWE will edit all taped shows to reinforce this.
96. WWE then punishes wrestlers for getting over outside of WWE sanctioned pushes.
97. Vince will lose money just to prove he controls wrestler fates.
98. Only roll-ups, weapon shots and finishers can end matches.
99. Taker will never, ever lose at WM.
94. WWE tells us who to like and hate.
95. WWE will edit all taped shows to reinforce this.
96. WWE then punishes wrestlers for getting over outside of WWE sanctioned pushes.
97. Vince will lose money just to prove he controls wrestler fates. 98. Only roll-ups, weapon shots and finishers can end matches.
99. Taker will never, ever lose at WM.
And countouts, disqualifications, tag team mis-communications, no-contests, being put in an ambulance/casket/hearse, catching fire, getting knocked out, climbing the ladder and retrieving something, capturing a flag, undressing your opponent to her underwear, touching the four turnbuckles of the ring while being strapped to your opponent, escaping a cage, escaping the Punjabi Prison, putting your opponent on a stretcher and rolling him past a line, drawing first blood, putting your opponent through a table etc.
I fail to see your point. You want a match to end after a bodyslam? Well, it can, if it's a BODY-SLAM CHALLENGE.
107. Jim Ross is better than you. Even if you are a veteran and former world champion who's made more money for the company in one year than he has in his entire life and we aren't sure exactly why.
108. Old guys can still work the crowd just by sneezing (but anybody under 45 obviously can't)
109. You don't have to be 6'5 and weigh 300 pounds to be world champion. All you have to do is hit a 619.
110. Wrestlers don't have to train for big ppv matches. Instead they cut promos hoping to get the call from Hollywood.
111. WWE makes a tribute video for a guy that died who hasn't been seen in over 30 years. By the way did they ever find the whereabouts of that Umaga guy?
112. JBL is a bully, racist, and stereotype of white america and so we must all hate him.
113. Daniel Bryan is a promo guy and entertainer. Bryan Danielson was a wrestler. Stone Cold Steve Austin was a promo guy and entertainer. Stunning Steve Austin was a wrestler. John Cena is a promo guy and entertainer. Prototype was a wrestler. Notice a unearthly pattern here TNA and Ring of Honor wrestling?
114. Chris Benoit didn't do it. It doesn't matter if the evidence is right in front of your face and the case has been solved for 5 years now. How can a mark possibly fadom a innocent professional wrestler can ever kill his family right. It's impossible.
115. Eric Simms a total nobody is more respected by professional wrestlers and professional wrestling fans of the last couple of generations than Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior, Ric Flair, and Macho Man combined.
116. If you don't know who The Sandman or New Jack is we'll forgive you but if you don't rate every single Kawada and Misawa match at least 5 stars you must be reprimanded.
117. Dave Meltzer contracted Hep C from Abdullah the Butcher.
120. Armdrag
121. Randy Savage has been in the danger zone
122. HES GOT A BAISYCKLE
123. Nobody won the 2004 Royal Rumble
124. The Rock will take your post, turn that sonofabitch sideways and stick it up your candy ass
WWE taught me that the only way to kill a zombie is to let his green soul out of the urn.
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